Chapter 12
Kyuhyun bit his lip as he shot all the Zergs to pieces. Beside him, Heechul occasionally watched when he wasn’t tweeting/replying to tweets on his iPhone. Even after a month and a half, the novelty of the new StarCraft hadn’t died. Heechul had even borrowed the game and installed it on his laptop as well. Even Kibum, who visited the dorm more often, borrowed the CD to be able to play with it. During breaks in their schedules, Kyuhyun almost always brought his laptop out and started playing. Currently, they were on break from filming one of the variety shows.

“Aish!” the magnae grumbled as his character got blown off. He leaned his head back on the chair’s headrest and closed his eyes.

“Kyuhyun,” Leeteuk suddenly called.

Kyuhyun lifted his head up and turned towards the door. He smiled and stood up at once when he saw that Jin Ri was there. “What are you doing here?”

“Can we talk outside?” she pleaded, glancing at the members, who were watching them curiously. She didn’t usually visit them on their schedules.

“Is something wrong? Did something happen?” Kyuhyun asked in concern as soon as they stepped out into the hallway and closed the waiting room door. His brow furrowed as she glanced around as if making sure that no one would be listening.

“I…” Jin Ri hesitated. 

“Jin, what’s the matter?” he gently repeated, trying to meet her eyes.

After a couple of seconds of not saying anything, she took a deep breath. “Nothing really. Just that… I tried to run away.”

“What? From whom?” he responded, frowning in confusion.

“From you,” she answered. She put up a hand before he could say anything else. “This thing with us,” she went on, gesturing back and forth between them. She gazed up at him. “You… It makes me happy in such a way I’d never been before. It’s been a while and I never really thought I deserved to be such.”

“Jin Ri—,” he started, wanting to interrupt.

“Please just let me get this out,” she insisted, shaking her head. “I know it doesn’t make sense and I’m probably thinking too much, but I just want you to know that this time I know.” She looked intently into his eyes, hoping that he understood what she meant. She hoped that he heard what she couldn’t say out loud. “I just know,” she repeated, biting her lip and averting her gaze from his.

They both stood there for a while, the gravity of her words sinking in. Kyuhyun had a look in his eyes that Jin Ri had never seen before, but one that he gave her all the time. She always just happened to miss it or purposefully ignore it.

“It scares me so much,” she continued, more softly this time. “It’s scares me to the point where I don’t think I can do it…” She lifted her eyes to his. “I’m sorry.”

“Jin Ri,” he began again.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to run away,” she interrupted, smiling a little. “I told you that I was done and I am.” She then bowed slightly. “That’s all I wanted to say,” she told him in almost a whisper. “I’ll let you get back to your activities.” She bowed again and walked away. 

~ * ~

“Is Kyu okay?” Eunhyuk asked, nudging Siwon.

The filming was just about to start and Kyuhyun was sitting down, ignoring the fans that were calling out his name, and was just staring into space. He was hunched over, his elbows resting on his knees, his hands clasped together.

Siwon shrugged then turned to Heechul. “Hyung,” he commented, nodding towards their magnae.

Heechul, without hesitation, stood up and sat down beside Kyuhyun. “I take it that your conversation with Jin Ri didn’t go well?”

Kyuhyun straightened up and gave him a confused expression. “What?”

“You’re always so happy whenever she’s around,” Heechul rephrased. “What’s wrong this time?” The older male was taken aback when the magnae suddenly grinned widely. “Ya! What’s wrong with you?” He hit the magnae hard on the arm.

Kyuhyun began laughing. “Nothing’s wrong with me. In fact, nothing’s wrong at all,” he informed him.

“Then what’s with the brooding and everything?” Heechul demanded. “You know all of the other members are so concerned that maybe Jin Ri broke your heart and that you might be going through what you went through when you and Na Young broke up. That wasn’t a very pleasant time for us either, you know.” He frowned when he remembered how Kyuhyun used to lock himself in his room whenever they didn’t have any schedules. He barely ate and barely said a word to any of them. It took almost half a year for him to function normally again.

“I’m not brooding,” Kyuhyun defensively said. “And this is nothing like what happened with Na Young. Jin Ri’s nothing like her.”

Heechul stared at him. “I thought you said that Jin Ri reminded you so much of Na Young.”

The younger male shook his head. “Maybe in the beginning she did. But when I started to really get to know Jin Ri, I realized how different they were from each other. And when Na Young visited…” He smiled. “They’re not the same. I don’t know why I even told Jin Ri about that.”

“You told Jin Ri that she reminded you of your ex?!” Heechul gaped at Kyuhyun when he nodded. “Pabo! Why would you do that?”

“I was just… I wanted to be honest,” Kyuhyun sputtered, turning red at the reaction of his hyung. He felt like he just did something really grave.

“You never, I repeat, never compare your ex with your current girlfriend,” Heechul instructed seriously. “You’re not even supposed to talk about your exes without them insisting upon the topic.”

“But Jin wasn’t my girlfriend then,” Kyuhyun argued. “So, technically, I didn’t break that rule.”

“Still, Kyu, I thought you would—wasn’t your girlfriend then? So does it mean you guys are together now?” Heechul sidetracked. He knew that the magnae knew that things weren’t completely platonic between them. It was a relief to know that he had finally admitted it.

“No,” Kyuhyun immediately countered, raising his hands and waving them to emphasize his point.

“Then what?” the older asked impatiently.

Kyuhyun silently took a deep breath as he thought back to his conversation with her earlier. “I think… I think she just told me that she loved me.”

“That’s a good thing, right?” Heechul asked, looking curiously at the magnae. His expression confused him. Wasn’t he supposed to be jumping up and down in joy?

Kyuhyun smiled for a moment then sighed. “She’s scared,” he relayed. “And it scares me that she’s scared. I want to make her happy. I don’t want her to be disappointed in me.”

“If she loves you like she said she does then she most likely doesn’t expect anything from you,” Heechul imparted. “And her fears probably pertain to other things.” He paused as if letting what he said sink in. “So what did you tell her?”

“I didn’t get the chance to say anything,” Kyuhyun revealed, glancing at his hyung. “She suddenly walked away and we had to go film.”

“I suggest you see her first thing after this,” Heechul advised.

~ * ~

“These look really good, Kyu,” Jin Ri complimented as she looked through the printed photos that Kyuhyun had taken. “You don’t need my help anymore.”

Kyuhyun looked up at her, some sort of worry in his eyes, halting the witty comeback that he wanted to say. “What do you mean? We’re not going to stop seeing each other, are we?”

“No, boyfriend,” she teased, rolling her eyes. Sometimes Kyuhyun’s paranoia about them stopping their friendship made her want to laugh aloud. But she supposed that she couldn’t blame him. It was her fault that he was afraid that she would leave. “I’m going to hang around you until you grow sick of me.”

“You better prepare yourself then,” he boasted. “You’re looking at forever here. I’m never going to grow sick of you.”

“Forever is just a word,” she replied, half-serious, half-joking. “Anyway, I like this one,” she declared, holding one of the prints up. It was a side view photo of herself, laughing, some strands of hair on her face.

“I love this picture,” he remarked, getting the copy from her and looking at it wistfully. She grabbed the photo from him and started to stuff it in her wallet. “Hey! That’s mine!” he protested, making a move to get the photo back.

“But it’s my photo,” she reasoned, pointing at herself.

“It’s you in the photo but it’s my photo,” he corrected her, smirking. “Now give it back.” He held his palm up and waited for her to place it on his hand.

“Hmph,” she commented and grudgingly handed him the picture. When he finally took it back, he started writing on the back of it. “Are you going to at least make me a copy? I really want to put one on my wall.”

“Fine, you can have this one,” he suddenly gave in, standing up and handing the print to her. Then he left her in the living room, going into his room.

She was about to put it in her wallet when she noticed that he had written something on the back.

You can have this photo because I have the real thing in my life. And she’s more incredible than any beautiful photo of her taken combined.

Jin Ri left the photo on the table.


Kyuhyun wondered, as he rang the doorbell, whether it was such a good idea for him to be there. He had followed Heechul’s advice and immediately rushed over to Jin Ri’s apartment as soon as filming was over. He wondered if he should think about his actions more clearly because he was afraid that he was going to get shot down again. Time and time again, all the hints he’d dropped, all the gestures, the gifts, she’d received them politely, but never with a welcoming smile. She was that afraid.

The door opened and Jin Ri, in a white robe, stood in the doorway, surprised to see him. “Kyuhyun, it’s three in the morning. What are you doing here?” she asked, rubbing an eye, trying to blink her sleepiness away.

“Can I come in?” Kyuhyun replied, averting his gaze from her and ignoring her question for the time being.

She opened the door wider, gesturing for him to come in. He went straight to the living room, her following in his wake.

“Do you want anything to drink or eat?” she offered, turning to go to the kitchen. His hand shot out to grab her wrist. She stopped and faced him, a curious expression on her face.

“I’m fine,” he told her, dropping her wrist. He didn’t know why, but he felt like he wanted to get over it already. He just wanted to talk to her and be open.

“What are you doing here, Kyuhyun?” she asked again, pulling her robe tighter around her.

“I was hoping we could talk,” he said, looking her in the eye for the first time since he arrived. “We didn’t really get a chance to do so earlier.”

“Can’t this wait ‘till later?” she responded, smiling a little, looking him over. She then frowned at his clothes. It was the very same ones that he was wearing when she came over to the set. “Did you just come from filming?” He nodded. She then made him sit down and, before he could protest, she went straight to the kitchen and prepared something for him to eat.

They spent the time with him eating in the kitchen in silence. Kyuhyun seemed concentrated on his food, while Jin Ri just watched him eat, not really thinking of anything.

“How’s Na Young?” she asked conversationally. “It must’ve been really good seeing her again.”

“She asked me to sing at her wedding,” he shared, putting his chopsticks down and meeting her eyes.

“She’s getting married?!” she exclaimed, eyes widening in surprise.

“What did you think she came over for?” he wanted to know, eyebrows raised, his mouth forming a small smirk.

“Well, not that,” she admitted, looking somewhat relieved.

“Is that why you left so suddenly?” he inquired, his smirk growing bigger.

She rolled her eyes. “Stop it with that cocky smile of yours.”

“Cut me some slack, will you?” he insisted teasingly. “This is the first time I’m getting any sort of confirmation from you.”

She looked confused. “Confirmation of what?”

“Of how you feel about me,” he straightforwardly answered. He chuckled when her cheeks turned red.

“Are you done eating?” she asked, avoiding replying to his comment. Without waiting for his answer, she got his plate and stood up, putting it on the sink. She started washing it, her back facing him.

He got up from his seat and walked to the space behind her. Slowly, he wrapped his arms around her waist and rested his chin on her right shoulder, hunching over her petite frame. Almost immediately she stiffened, nearly dropping the plate she was washing.

“What are you doing?” she demanded in almost a whisper.

“I know you’re scared,” he began quietly. “I know that you’d rather run away than be with me. But I want you to know that I’m going to do everything I can to make you happy, to assure you that things would be okay, to make your fears subside.” He paused, touching his cheek on hers. “It’s not going to be easy. We’re going to fight. We’re going to hate each other sometimes. You might even throw things at me.” He smiled when she chuckled. “But I promise you that I’m always going to come back to you because…” He got the plate from her hand and placed it on the sink. Then he turned her around to face him, looking into her eyes. “…because I’m sure about you. I just know that it’s you.”

Jin Ri stood there, looking at him, watching every facial expression that flitted on his face. She knew he was sincere and she appreciated everything that he said. But… “Kyuhyun, we barely know each other.”

Kyuhyun smiled and nodded. “I know it’s only been a couple of months, but Jin, you’re all I think about. I just… This may sound cliché, but it’s never been this way with anyone.”

“That is cliché,” she agreed, nodding. She chuckled when he made at face at her.

“So… what do you say?” he asked, smiling a little as he searched her eyes. She hesitated. “How about we start with I like you?”

“That’s so middle school,” she giggled.

“I’m willing to go middle school for you any day until you feel comfortable enough,” he told her eagerly.

“I like you, too,” she responded, making up her mind and smiling. All of a sudden, she was just tired of waiting. She really did like Kyuhyun a lot and she thought that maybe it was worth giving a relationship with him a try. Especially when it seemed like he was willing to go slow for her. She then stood on tiptoe, her wet hands grasping the sides of his shirt, and gave him a peck on his left cheek.

He shook his head seriously. “That’s not going to do.”

Before she could ask what he meant, his hands were already on the base of her head, his thumbs on the sides of her face and had pressed his lips against hers. Her eyes flew shut as his soft lips moved against hers and she found herself kissing him back as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

“That wasn’t very middle school of you,” she remarked when they pulled away.

“What—you never kissed anyone in middle school?” he shot back in shock. He ducked as she slapped his arm.

“We should take a photo,” she suddenly stated, untangling herself from him so that she could get her camera. Being a photographer, she wanted to document and preserve a moment as important as this. After all, it was a while since she had been this happy.

He chuckled and followed her to her room, where she was retrieving one of her Polaroid cameras. He walked over to her photo wall and noticed that the picture of her that he had written on the back of, the one she had left behind, was now plastered on there. He continued to look at the photos, smiling as he realized that there were a lot of photos with him in it.

“I see you’re smiling conceitedly again,” she observed, standing beside him and looking at the photo wall as well.

“I can’t help it,” he admitted unabashedly, gesturing to the wall. To him, it was just proof of how much their relationship had grown over the few months they had known each other. It made him so happy that he didn’t know how he could ever stop smiling anymore.

She chuckled and waved him over. “C’mon, let’s take a photo,” she said, stretching her arms, holding the camera as far away from them as possible, while he situated himself behind her, his arms around her waist.

Once the photo was taken and printed, Jin Ri placed it in the middle of her photo wall. She smiled contentedly as she looked at their faces side-by-side, their smiles as bright as the sun. Kyuhyun wrapped his arms around her waist once again, hugging her from the back. He gave her a kiss on the cheek.

“I like you, Chung Jin Ri,” he sincerely declared.

“I like you, too, Cho Kyuhyun.”