Thanks for ate TheHeartlessVixen for meeting me up when I was in Manila. :)

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It's been a year! This is my New Year's gift to you. :)

And I will have new fics when this story ends. The Ruined and The Crown and there's one coming.

If I could just spend with Baekhyun alone this day, I would. This could be the last with him for I will finally tell him the truth. I don’t want to keep his life from misery and for sure he won’t forgive me. And I know I deserve it for I will scar his life.

But unfortunately, we have to attend this party for all the idols. I don’t know why did they came up to this idea since it never happened before. It was sponsored by all the companies for all the artists and this is hosted by SBS.

“You know, you don’t have to go,” Sooyoung said. “You could take this time to spend with the twins.”

I smiled. “The twins were the one who chose my dress. They said that I should come since they will be going to their grandparents with GD’s sister for he needs to attend to the party too,” I explained. Assuring that this is okay.

I thought about what Jiyong said yesterday. That made me nervous because I don’t know what will happen next. Surely, we will have a complete family but what about the people around us? They would really think that I just used Baekhyun to lure Jiyong again. Or they would think how I am to have a children outside marriage, how irresponsible mother I am, or how jerk Jiyong is. I could take all the insults and hatred but what about the future of my twins? And also, what about my work? SM for sure will sue me for defamation, for bridging of contract regarding the identity of the twins and this could cause a ruckus to my members. I don’t want to drag them down. So before these things get worst, I should talk to my family, to my members, to the company, to Jiyong that I will be quitting. I’m choosing my family over my carrier. I’ve already saved up enough to raise my kids until college.

After preparing myself for an hour, I’m finally done. It was a formal party and so I am required to wear a gown. I guess most of them was present tonight. It was said that this party is for the idols to have their free time to interact with other idols since recently, they were lots of instances regarding bashers when their idols were caught talking or just looking at their biases. Tsk. Fans now were really immature.

At first, Baekhyun insisted that we should be together in going but I declined for our own safety. I already hogged him yesterday away from his friends and besides, we will all see each other at the event. And there’s no way that I’ll go with Jiyong because I know for sure that my life will be in a total danger.

I still couldn’t get over the fact that he said he still loves me. I know, he does. But he got me tongue-tied. I couldn’t even utter a word! I would just deal with him… soon.

“Oppa?” I said through phone. They were loud noises on the background.

“Where are you? Can I go with you at the party?” I asked, looking at my reflection in the mirror.

“I’m already here. I am the MC later. Why? Don’t you have someone with you?”

“Uh, my members were on different salon. I’m with Sooyoung, and he’s boyfriend is here. Isn’t it rude for me to come with them?”

“Oh, Sunny’s here also. How about Tiffany?”

I sighed. She’s at the second to the last of my resort.

“You know I still haven’t talk to her yet, but I will, soon. Just not now, oppa. Okay?” I really miss her but I still have no soul to talk to her while there are still things crumpled up right in front of me. I’ll take everything one by one. I can’t serve two masters at the same time.

“Would you like me to call GD?” my eyes automatically widened.

“Omo, no, no, no,” and then the line was cut off.

After minutes of thinking how could I go to the event safely, or should I drive instead with this gown… he called.

“Would you like me to pick you up?” he said with a hoarseness on his voice. I could feel the chills running through my whole body.

“No, no,” I said.

“Are you avoiding me?” there was a hint of sadness on his voice. I know I hurt him yesterday when he got no response from me. He told me he loves me, and I stood there, saying nothing at all.

I love you is a statement, not a question to answer. And by knowing Jiyong, if ever he got a positive answer from me, all hell will break lose. He’ll do everything he can just to get me and I am not ready for that.

I drew a deep breath and sighed. “No. I am not avoiding you. I just told you about my plans, right? Can’t I be with my boyfriend for the very last time?” I softly said. I know it will do me no good if I’ll argue with him.

He was silent for a minute and said, “I need you to be safe. Don’t move, Taeyeon.”

And then the line went off. Hanging me with his words. I was consciously looking around the place, I couldn’t move, what if he’ll pop out somewhere here with just a step I’ll take?

“Kim Taeyeon?” someone asked by