Middle School

Luhan was laying on his bed and stared at the ceiling. Since the day Sehun left, Luhan has been in a state of depression. He was quieter than usually, he spent most of the time sitting in his room. He barely talked to someone especially not to his father and sister. When Hara tried to aprroach him, he would just walk pass her. He only talked to his father when he was asked. There was a not previously known distance between them and it's broke his heart. After several weeks he decided to pull himself together and once for all forget about Sehun. Luhan tried to distract himself, he concentrated on playing more soccer, spent time with friends and pursued his hobby but when he was alone, Sehun would come to his mind.  And Sehun wasn't making it easier for him. Everytime he called, Luhan had to control himself not to snatch the telephone away from one of his family member. He also wrote him a lot of letter. Knew that it was the best not to read them but he didn't have the heart to throw them away. His mother noticed the strange attitude of her son, was really worry but his father said that was because of his puberty.

Nearly a year has passed.

He looked at the alarm clock. 6 a.m. School starts today again. He jumped out of his bed and went to the bathroom.

"Morning, mother" He gave her a kiss on the cheek and sat next to her. The housemaid brang his breakfast. 

"Where is father?" He asked, hoped that he was already gone.

"He already went to his office." She replied and sipped on her coffee. 

Hara, who was sitting across Luhan, tried to start a conversation with him. "I heard from mother that you been hanging a lot with the Park's son. What's was his name again?"

"Chanyeol" 

She tried to ignore the cold tone from him. "He is a nice kid. I'm sure you going to be great friends." 

Luhan stared back at her "I hope i will not lose him too." Hara's body slightly tremble. She looked down and concentrated on her food again. Before his mother could say anything further, he stand up from the table. "I have to go now."

When he was outside the house, Luhan breathe out in relieved. His chauffeur was standing in front of him, waiting to drive him to school. When he was about to enter the car, someone took a hold of his wrist. He turned his face to the side, a bit mad at the bold action, but his face expression changed immediately when he saw who was standing next to him.

Oh Sehun.

"Since when are you back?" Luhan asked. They were both now on the playground, where they always used to be. They stand next to each other but there was a huge distance between the two. Luhan took a side glance at him. Sehun had grow a lot. His hair was shorter and his shoulder broader. 

"Yesterday night" he replied. 

"I'm sorry for your lost." Sehun nodded. They both seemed like a couple who broke up with each other and now having awkward conservation. Sehun, who no long could bear the silence, started to talk.

"Luhan, why are you ignoring me?"

"Let us discuss this another time okay? I don't want to be late" He tried to avoid any eye contact with Sehun. 

"Do you know how much in concern i was? Everytime you didn't pick up the phone or didn't want to talk with me, that you didn't answered my letter or even read them. Every month i asked my aunt to look after you , every week i played with the thought to visit you, every day i'm scared about that fact that maybe something might happen to you and every hour i missed you badly." Luhan's heart skipped a beat. He looked up at him and immediately regretted it. Sehun's eyes were filled with sadness and pain. He bit on his lips, fought with the wish to took Sehun into his arms. How can i forget you when you look at me like that?

Luhan closed his eyes. He never thought this moment would come, wished that he would never have to say this word, but what choice does he have? 

"I'm tired of you, Oh Sehun"

"What?"

"The way you talked, the way you cried, the way you being a smartass and they way you smiled, just everthing " he paused, "sicken me."

Sehun looked irritate at him. "Luhan, why are you saying something like this? I don't understand you." 

Luhan groaned "Did you listen to what i just say? What's there not to understand!"

"That's not you, the Luhan i know would never say something like that."

"Well, it seems that you don't know much about me. Time changed, Sehun, so do i. Do you know why i was always so nice to you? Because my mother was befriend with your parents, because i pity you, there's nothing more behind it. Now i have enough, your endlessly sorrow just bored me to death."

"Don't go to far, Luhan." Anger rose in him. He clechend his hand to a fist.  

Luhan leaned closer to Sehun. "What do you plan to do? Are you going to stop the friendship with me? Because i don't give a about it. I don't care about your feeling, i never have."

Sehun felt like someone just stab him in the heart. He forcefully grabbed Luhan's arm. Luhan winced at the pain. "Is that what you want? Look me in the eyes and says it!" Luhan gulped, felt how his body started to tremble. Never had he seen Sehun so angry and it scared him. He knew that Sehun probably will never forgive him in this life. That he will never look, touch and smile at him again. 

He took a deep breath, try to control all his emotion and stared right in Sehun's eyes

"You heard me. I meant every word that i just said."

They hold their stares for a moment, the time stood still for both of them at that moment. Sehun slowly let go of his hold, his face was expressionless.

"I'm apologize that i wasted your valuable time, i won't bother you anymore in the future. Please don't talk to me again"

With that sentence he walked passed Luhan. Luhan felt on the ground, his legs gave up on him. Tears filled up his eyes. He wanted to scream but was afraid that Sehun would heard him. He biten his lips too hard, they started to bleed. He promised himself that he will never forget how much he hurt Sehun.

"I'm so sorry" he whispered. 

Rain fell down on him. 

High School

"I'm finish up the cleaning. Can i help you with something else?" Kyungsoo asked. 

"There's no need. I still have some paperwork to do, you can go home now. Good job today" Sehun's aunt smiled at him. Kyungsoo bowed his head, grabbed his bag and made his way out. 

Since it was still early, he decided to walk around for a little. He was really nervous because tomorrow will be his first day in SM high school. The SM high school is one of the most well known private school. Getting accepted to this elite high school is the first step torward entry to a higher social class. They only took students with outstanding grades. Students, which parents or grandparents went to this school, are often prefered. The rich and powerful family spend loads of money in their child private eduacation to get them into this school. For the most family the high tuition fee was not a real problem, but for Kyungsoo it was. His family was not wealthy.  His both parents have an average incomes, but since it was Kyungsoo's wish to enter the school, his parents did everything to make his his dream come true. They both got two jobs, they worked til late night and even took a loan. If anybody in this world deserve it to enter this school, it would be their son. When Kyungsoo heard that he got accepted, he jumped around in his house, hugged his parents more than fifty times and the smile never left his face. He was very thankful for his parent and promised himself to make them proud. Kyungsoo smiled at the sky. 

It's going to be a good day.

It's going to be a bad day.

Kim Jongin totally forget that school started today. He checked on his phone. 8 missed call from home. 1 missed call from Sehun. He decided that it was the best not to call his parent since they will only end up arguing with each other. Jongin's father is the principal at the SM High School, it was the manly the reason why Jongin got accepted. His parent practically force him to visit the school. In Jongin's eyes, his life was complete planned by his family and it made him crazy. He often get in trouble just to provoked his parents. That is the only way to get real attention from them, because no matter what he did it was never good enough.

Sometimes he wondered, why he even tried.

He dialed Sehun's number. 

"Where are you?" Sehun answered. Jongin rolled his eyes.

"Good morning you too."

"I'm apologize. Good morning. Where are you?"

"I'm at Baekhyun's house. Let's us meet in", he looked at the clock on the wall " 20 minutes in front of the school gate."

"Ok. Don't be late!" 

"Bye you too!" He hung up.

Clicked. 

Baekhyun stepped out of the bathroom from upstairs, already dressed in his uniform. He walked down the stairs to the kitchen. He came to a halt when he spotted Jongin, who was still laying on the couch and playing on his phone. He hit him on the forehead. 

"Move your , we're going to be late!"

Baekhyun's dad were rarely home, he were usually on business trip for month. His mother died when he was still young and his father couldn't take care of him. It's not that he didn't love his son, but he was always busy and lacked of experience when it came to kids. So it was always the housemaid who was there for him. Even though Baekhyun claimed that it doesn't bother him, that his father was not by his side, Jongin knew that inside Baekhyun was a lonely person. 

He watched Baekhyun, who was now standing in the kitchen, making himself a sandwich. Jongin lazily got up and walked up to Baekhyun. He snapped away the sandwich and bit on it.

"Hey, give it back! How can you do such cruel things?"

Baekhyun jumped up, reached out his hand, but Jongin just hold the sandwich higher, which was now out of his reach. Baekhyun pouted. A smirked grew on Jongin's face, he leaned closer to his shorter friend.

"Give me a kiss and i will hand it back" Baekhyun quickly stepped back. Blush suffused his cheeks. 

"Don't joke around like that. I have a boyfriend." There was an awkward silence between them two. Jongin smiled and tousled Baekhyun's hair.

"I know, i know. I won't do that again" He gave Baekhyun his sandwich back and walked to the bathroom. Baekhyun looked worried after him. Once he was inside he sitted down on the ground and sighed in frustration.

Why do i always want what i can't have?

Enjoy the chapter!