The brisk wind felt good. It whipped across the soccer field, the wide open space offering the least protection from the cool air. The remnants of snow piled haphazardly on the sidelines solidified the late winter atmosphere. Minseok ran down the field with all of his might, intent on stealing the ball from Chanyeol. It was exhilarating – playing a game of soccer with his pack.

“Hyung!” Tao cried as he managed to steal the ball from a tired Kyungsoo and make a pass towards Minseok.

Minseok received the soccer ball with ease, turning to run down field towards the goal. It was funny how something so simple as playing soccer had so much of an effect on his mood. It had been a long few days (weeks, really); with his Father’s arrival the pack had begun to resume their normal lives – hinged on the promise that no more attacks would be launched towards them.

The ball landed in the goal, flying past a cringing Suho.

“That almost hit me in the face!” Suho threw his hands up.

“Sorry” Minseok smiled, not actually caring one bit. The ball was far from Suho, the haphazard goalie was just being dramatic.

“Okay, we need to switch team members up” Kyungsoo finally arrived where the group was standing. Kyungsoo was not exactly an athletic wolf, the running involved in playing soccer was a bit beyond his abilities (or any athletic goals he ever held for himself). “You guys are too good.”

“Yah! We can beat them!” Chanyeol turned towards the smaller man, shooting him a scowl.

“I think we should just stop.” Suho sat down, hands on his head, “I am so tired.”

“I agree.” Kyungsoo weighed in.

“So do I!”

The group turned towards the newcomer. It would be a lie to say they didn’t know he was coming. Well, at least Minseok knew he was coming but he had ignored it.

Luhan was marching down the field, face red and eyes wide.

“Minseok, you shouldn’t be doing something so dangerous in your condition.” Luhan practically pounced on his mate, wrapping his arms protectively around his midsection.

Chanyeol groaned. He had seen enough of an overprotective Luhan lately to last a lifetime. Suho even shook his head. He was certain he would never be that clingy to Jongdae, even if Jongdae was carrying his pups (which he was not, regretfully).

Minseok felt the familiar fire creeping up from his chest into his face.

“I was playing soccer, Lu! I am not ing sky diving!” Minseok remained in his lovers embrace, but stiffened his posture. He was sick of being treated like a porcelain tea cup, ready to break at any moment.

“But what if you fell down hard? Or something worse…?” Luhan queried, tightening his embrace.

“Luhan, you have to let me live my life...”

“I have to protect you, Min” Luhan breathed. “I have to keep you safe. I hate thinking what could happen to you…”

And that did it. Minseok snapped. Because the last thing he liked to think about was being a helpless creature, always having to be protected.

Minseok jerked hard, sending Luhan crashing back, hitting the still frozen ground hard. Luhan’s eyes were wide as he took in the back profile of Minseok, stalking down the field.

“Minseokie?!” Luhan called, springing to his feet to give chase.

Minseok whirled around, fury on his face. His pack stayed still, watching the lovers quarrel with more interest than they probably should have shown.

“Damnit Lu! I am not dying! I am not breakable! Give me some space! What are you going to do when I start university?”

“Wait, you are going to go to school?” Luhan looked sincerely surprised, “But Min…”

“And stop calling me Minseokkie, or…I…” Minseok swallowed hard, choking on the words he did not exactly mean but needed to say none the less, “Or I am going to move out.”

That shut up the pretty rich boy. And the pack. Minseok turned and stalked off, letting his words hang over the wolves standing frozen on the soccer field.

***

The movie theater was far from packed. It was a matinee showing of the cheesiest romantic comedy that had been released that year. It annoyed Minseok more. After storming away from his annoying mate he had wandered around for a bit, finally wandering into the darkened movie house.

Minseok needed a place to think, to be alone, and hopefully to forget that stupid jerk face that he had fallen in love with. And here he was, watching two people indulge in gags and stupid bickering amidst a love line that Minseok could have written drunk. Aish.

There was another person in the theater, sitting in the front. Minseok had paid him little attention. That is until the man had turned slightly, allowing Minseok a look at his side profile. He recognized him. He sense him, he had just driven off recognition amidst his own contemplation.

“Dad” It was a whisper, but if the man was truly Minseok’s Father he would hear it. Any wolf would.

The man stood up and walked towards Minseok’s seat, at the far back of the theater.

“Minseok-ah?”

“Why are you here?” Minseok asked, genuinely curious why his Father would be watching such a terrible movie in the early afternoon.

“I needed some place to think” Like father like son, “Why are you here?”

“Well, I needed some alone time”

“Is Luhan getting to you?” His Father asked. He remained standing. In the dark Minseok could not exactly make out his facial expression, but he sensed the older man’s apprehension over sitting near his son.

“You, um, you can sit down if you want to.” Minseok found the words difficult to speak. It was strange, this feeling. This man was his father so he felt some sort of obligation to be close to him, even if he barely remembered him. His memories of certain events were crystal clear, but his memories of how much he cared for his father were locked in a haze. He felt responsibility towards filial behavior but had nothing to back it up, at least nothing he could feel with absolute clarity.

Sung Woo sat, consciously sitting one chair away from his son. He knew this relationship was not exactly full of confidence at this point, he didn’t want to push his luck.

“You know he is a good kid.” Sung Woo spoke carefully, “He has had a lot of responsibility since he was young.”

Minseok huffed. So his Dad was on Luhan’s side? Well, it could almost be a reasonable thing, after all his Father seemed to have spent more years as an acquaintance of Luhan than he had spent living as Minseok’s dad. Which honestly did nothing to calm Minseok’s racing mind.

“Yeah, and he sure likes to show it.” Minseok muttered.

“He loves you” Sung Woo chanced a glance at his son, “But he is a needy person. He has always guarded his pack fiercely. He loves too much.”

“Unlike you.” Minseok wasn’t even aware he had said it until it was too late.

Sung Woo tensed. “How so?”

“You were free this whole time and never looked for me? I mean, you couldn’t find me with all of your connections?” Minseok was hurt by this fact, even if his Father had promised he had searched for him. He felt like it was an embellished truth (if a man who was so connected could not find him who could) and in his current mood he had no problem voicing it.

“I tried” Sung Woo sighed heavily, “Don’t take your anger at your mate out on me.”

Minseok looked straight ahead, not ready to admit anything.

“Do you know how I met your Mother?”

Minseok didn’t. Honestly he had no idea how his Mother and Father had met. Life in the pack was such a distant memory, his time with them so short. He had never had a chance to sit around on a hot summer night, hearing his parents recall the stories of their youth. He shook his head, still not looking at his father.

“She was such a beautiful woman...” Sung Woo said, his words drawing him back through the decades, “I met her at the red moon gathering. Do you know what that is?”

“Was that when the unmated wolves of the province gathered?”

“Yeah” Something about how Minseok recalled this detail made Sung Woo’s chest swell in pride. His son was a wolf after all. “She was small, with eyes that could captivate anyone from a hundred yards away.”

It was silent for many moments, neither man speaking.

“You have her eyes in fact. Honest, fiery but calm eyes…a beautiful contradiction” Sung Woo smiled “She was so sure that she would never be mated, much less to anyone that was outside of her pack. And then we caught each other’s scent on the wind. She smelled like honeysuckle, like lilacs, like a beautiful flower that lingers in the night breeze. I loved her. From then on I loved her.”

“How did she die?” Minseok dreaded the answer but he needed to know. He had always assumed all of the adults of the Cloud Mountain pack had been killed the day that the purge reached them. If not the day of shortly after, when they were dragged off to that horrible government lab.

“I don’t know” Sung Woo felt tears springing up, his cheeks were hot with memories and grief, “I never saw her after the purge.”

Minseok didn’t know what to say. He remembered his mother, what pup could forget their mother? The woman that nursed them, held them, loved them. At least every pup had a mother that hopefully did all of those things, Minseok knew others were not as lucky as him. He remembered her scent the most, a comforting smell that put his mind at ease, a scent that signaled he was safe and the world could not harm him.

Sung Woo chocked on a sob, stiffening his back he held a hand to his mouth. He would not break down in front of his son.

“My greatest regret is that I could not protect her…or you.”

It was the first time Minseok had truly considered his father’s regret, his feelings towards his family – hell, his packs, slaughter. It was painful to consider, because it added on to a grief that Minseok tried to keep buried. He had always attempted to be strong for the remaining Cloud Mountain pack, he was their leader after all. He had long ago given up crying over his past. Long ago he had given up considering things like how his Mother felt or how his Father felt during the purge.

“Minseok” Sung Woo’s voice was raspy, full of the sorrow that had bubbled up in him as he thought back to the decade before, “Just know that I love you.”

Minseok remained still, staring at the floor. The horrible movie playing on the screen. The darkness blanketing the reality of the moment in a way that was welcome by both men. They didn’t want to see the pain in each other’s faces. They didn’t want to feel like kindred souls as they confessed their burdens. They weren’t close enough to share their hurt, their suffering, and their struggles.

Sung Woo stood. Before he left he placed a hand on Minseok’s shoulder, patting his son’s shoulder once and then twice before he took his leave.

Minseok remained in the theater for many minutes after his father left; his mind swimming with feelings of regret, of love, of memories. Of the smell of honeysuckle. Of what it felt like to have parents. He found himself placing a hand on his abdomen as he recalled a time gone by.

***

Sehun was done. Completely and totally done. Or at least he was pretending like it. He pulled the covers tightly over his head, faking a snore.

“Sehun-ah?” Tao whispered.

Sehun was sure his roommate, his best friend, that guy he had kissed yesterday was staring at him. But he would not give in. Nope, he would not give up. He was asleep damnit!

Tao sighed, then sat on his own bed. Or at least that is how Sehun assumed he moved given the slight creak of the bed springs.

Sehun tensed. It was too difficult to avoid someone who you shared a room with. Since the kiss the day before Sehun had been carefully strategizing the best ways to avoid his roommate.

It wasn’t a horrible kiss, or an unwelcome one necessarily. Tao had seemed to enjoy it, his hand finding the small of Sehun’s back as he pulled him closer. Their lips were joined for what seemed like an hour, but was much less time if Sehun had to judge by the clock he spotted as he ran away from the playground. Yep, he ran away.

As Sehun’s face grew hot, as he felt a tug in his stomach, as blood rushed to somewhere blood did not usually rush to (well, unless it was a year ago and he was eying up that picture of Luhan taken in front of that brick wall full of graffiti and edgy promise) he panicked. He had broken their lip lock and promptly ran for his life. He heard Tao call after him, but he kept going. Sehun was pretty sure he had never ran so fast in his short life. Romantic confusion was a great motivator.

So now Sehun was busy pretending to be asleep. He had pretended to be sick earlier in the day – or at least give some kind of impression of why he was in the bathroom for two hours as Tao hung out in the room. Oh, and then he kept getting phone calls whenever Tao approached him. It was too bad the phone never rang, he was hoping Tao bought that he had his ringtone on silent. Or something. Aish.

“Sehun…I know you are awake.” Tao whispered.

Sehun shut his eyes tighter.

“If you want me to forget what happened yesterday just tell me.”

Sehun felt like screaming. So the kiss was so easy Tao could just forget it?

“Hun-ah, if you want to go back to before please just let me know.”

Sehun gripped the blanket tighter, his blood boiling. So Mr. martial arts super wolf was so unfazed he could just go back to before?

“Hun-ah, I have kissed people before. You don’t have to worry, it isn’t like it means anything.”

Tao’s expression was priceless. His eyes were as wide as an owls as his roommate threw off his covers, springing to his feet in one swift motion.

“It meant nothing to you?!” Sehun yelled, his face flushed, “You kissed other people?!”

Tao was not sure how to respond, so he did what he did best.

“Yeah- and why are you avoiding me?!” Tao jumped off his bed and ran to the bathroom door.

Sehun should have known. He should have expected it. He heard the bathrooms door’s lock click, followed by a sob. It was going to be a long night in the Sehun/Tao room.

***

The low lamp light was what welcomed Minseok. The house was sleeping by the time he had found his way back to the estate. It was a long time before he had felt like he could return home, like he could think straight. His anger at Luhan was justified, his mate was being overprotective. Yet his anger could have taken a better route than a threat of leaving. And his Father’s words had helped him realize that more than he cared to admit.

Luhan was sleeping, lying on his side with the blanket scrunched up at his side. The sight made Minseok smile. His mate always looked so innocent, so childlike, when he slept. Not wanting to wake him Minseok carefully grabbed his pajamas, changing into the white t-shirt and grey sweat pants in the bathroom.

As Minseok went to turn off the bathroom light he caught his reflection in the bathroom mirror. He looked tired, he looked exhausted to be honest. But what he focused on was his eyes. Were they really like his mother’s? How could he forget how she looked? How could his memories focus on things like how soft her fur was when, as a pup, when he cuddled into her side? How could he recall her scent, her words, but not her eyes?

It was a few minutes before Minseok made his way to his mate’s side, slipping under the bit of blanket that Luhan did not have grasped tightly around him. It was a few minutes before Minseok could let his thoughts go. It was a few minutes before Minseok could relegate fractured memories to the reality of a home, a mate, and pups of his own.

a/n- I had to write a sleeping Luhan scene after today’s news that he is going to be absent from TLP in Bangkok due to exhaustion. Rest Lu and take as much time as you need. Poor baby! Hope you enjoyed this angsty chapter, let me know in the comments. P.S.- Rose, I lied. Here is an update a few days early. Hehe, let me know what you think!