Myungsoo’s turned away at the hospital.

“I’m sorry Myungsoo-ssi, but you can’t go in there,” the nurse tells him, barricading the door. Myungsoo might have pushed past her in his distress but he restrains himself. It would get him kicked out and that wouldn’t do any good.

“But I need to see if he’s okay, I need to see him, I need to see Sungjong-” I need to tell him I love him.

“I understand Myungsoo-ssi, but he’s in surgery right now,” the nurse says gently. “He’ll be in there for a few more hours. You’re welcome to wait.”

Wait? Wait? Wait to see if Sungjong will make it or not, she means. But Myungsoo doesn’t say that out loud and instead thanks her before storming from the hospital, afraid he’ll start crying again.

He doesn’t go back to Sungjong’s home. Sungyeol is probably still there and he can’t deal with him right now.

Instead, he winds up at his studio. He can’t remember if he has any appointments today or not. He can’t bring himself to care either way.

Taking one look at his desk, he feels his heart start to finally break. Just a little. Covering the desk are pictures of Sungjong that he meant to give to the younger later. Or keep them for himself. He hadn’t decided yet.

But looking at them now just reminds him that Sungjong could be dead, he could be gone, and he would never know...he’d never know.

He’d never know how much Myungsoo loves him and it would be all Myungsoo’s fault because he hadn’t told him. He’d been too scared to tell him and now the world is laughing at him because he blew his chance.

Tears drip down his face but he ignores them as he swipes the photos and papers from his desk, not caring that they go flying everywhere. He’s beyond caring at this point.

He starts to throw things around, shouting and crying at the same time, and not caring that he’s completely destroying his studio. He doesn’t care that things are breaking, he doesn’t care that he’s ruining one of the only things that brings him happiness, he doesn’t care.

Because Sungjong brings him happiness, Sungjong is his happiness and without him, Myungsoo doesn’t know what he’ll do. Is there anything for him to do now?

Why did he have to meet him? He isn’t used having to live for somebody. He knows Sungjong isn’t either.

Maybe he’ll stay alive for Myungsoo. Maybe Myungsoo will be selfish enough to think Sungjong will fight to live for him.

Maybe.

It’s been a week. Sungjong hasn’t woken up yet.

Myungsoo goes to visit him everyday, clearing the same time slot in his schedule. He would spend all day at the hospital if he could but he knows it wouldn’t go any good if he lost his job. Then he wouldn’t be able to take care of Sungjong.

Even with little hope, Myungsoo continues to think of time after Sungjong has woken up and he’s confessed. They’d live together then, in Myungsoo’s apartment because he knows Sungjong’s home has too many bad memories.

Myungsoo would go soft and slow, getting rid of all of Sungjong’s fears and soon Sungjong would be okay again.

They’d get a dog, or maybe two. It would be nice to come home to a pet but it’d be even better to come home to Sungjong. He’d kiss him, ask him about his day, and they’d go from there.

They’re stupid fantasies, Myungsoo decides, but they’re all he has.

“You’re here again?”

He doesn’t look up to see Sungyeol standing in the doorway. They’ve crossed paths a couple times, each wanting to see Sungjong and Myungsoo tries not to talk to him any more than he has to.

So he merely nods and tries to ignore Sungyeol’s presence as he pulls up a chair alongside Sungjong’s bedside.

They sit in silence for a while, Myungsoo still gripping his lover’s hand tightly.

“Has there been any progress?”

“No,” answers Myungsoo shortly. It’s quiet once again but when he catches sight of the time, he groans to himself. It’s time to go.

He hates leaving the other two alone, even though he knows Sungyeol can’t do anything with people constantly around.

“I’m leaving first.” He presses a kiss to the back of Sungjong’s hand and gets up, stiffening when Sungyeol calls him.

“Myungsoo-ssi?”

“Hm?”

“You really are good for him, you know.”

Myungsoo grips the doorknob until his hand hurts. "I know."

A/N: So it's been awhile and I'm really sorry for that. School's been absolute murder and I need to start doing things for college, so there's that...just really stressful. So I'm terribly sorry you all have had to wait for a long time!

Also, I'm getting a new trailer soon but it probably won'y be finished until after this fic is done, so if you want to periodicallly check after this fic is marked as 'complete', that would be welcomed as well.

This is the second-to-last chapter. Everything's going to be wrapped up next chapter, so I'll do my best to have it out as soon as I can and make it up to everyone who's waited. :)

Until next time darlings!