Boy oh boy, things are not going the way I planned this year. Long story short, the apartment I was living in was going to be demolished so I had to move out. On a positive note, I'll be moving over to California to live with a cousin of mine. I missed that girl. I'll type as much as I can during my move but I won't promise a long update soon. I hope the year started out well for all of you and I hope you enjoy this chapter :)

“Then I promised her that I’d take her to New York when she got older.”

Jessica had taken me home that night after she visited her sister. It’s been three days since then and currently we were on my porch. She said she came to talk about the things she couldn’t with others and that made me feel warm inside again.

“So promises are a big deal to both of you, aren’t they?”

Jessica nodded. “It's dumb really. I don't come through with one promise and that gives her the right to just explode?"

"You did leave with no explanation, Jessica." 

"... Maybe I shouldn’t have promised her all those things. I should’ve just said nothing at all.”

“Well, it was probably a good thing that you made so many promises. I mean, you did complete most of them. You bought her a doll when she behaved well for a week, you took her to do some indoor rock climbing when she aced her test, you even convinced your parents to buy her a dog after she passed middle school with A’s and B’s. You kept past promises and that’s what’s important.”

I turned to face Jessica and she was looking at me with a smile. I looked away. “W-what?”

“You just always do that thing to me.”

“What thing?”

“That thing where you make me feel like maybe I’m not such a bad person after all.”

I shook my head. “You aren’t a bad person. You’re the opposite.”

She inched towards me. “Taeyeon, tell me about your childhood.”

“My childhood?” Jessica nodded. “Well, I wasn’t a very active kid. I mostly read all the time.”

“You’re kidding me.” She said mockingly.

I chuckled. “I went to private school for a bit and then my parents put me in public school.”

“Did you get good grades?”

“I never got an A in any subject other than literature.”

“Wow, and I thought you’d be the type to love math.” Jessica then rested her head onto my shoulder.

I felt giddy again, my face grew warmer and my heart raced a second faster.

“You’re alright with this, right?” She asked.

I my lips and looked out into the trees nearby. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“What was your dream?”

I scratched my head. “I never really had a dream. I only wanted to be accepted by the people I met.”

“So what would you call that?”

I thought about it for a moment. “I considered it a distant future.”

I then felt Jessica’s hand intertwine with mine. I felt lightheaded, like the world was moving way too fast. Are these the feelings friends can give you?

“It’s not such a distant future now, Tae. You’ve made more friends than you thought possible.”

I gripped her hand a little tighter. “Jonghyun and Simon are my friends?”

She lifted her head from my shoulder. “Of course they are. Simon wants to get to know you better and you’re all Jonghyun ever talks about.”

“I-I am?”

Jessica snorted. “Don’t tell me you haven’t seen the way he looks at you.”

"I haven't..."

Jessica brought our hands onto her lap. “Well I have and let me tell you, it’s pretty hilarious.”

I smiled. “I’m glad they want to be friends with me.”

“They aren’t the only ones.” I looked at her. “Remember the girls that were in Jonghyun’s apartment?”

I nodded.

“They want to meet you too. They think you’re a funny and unique character, especially Hyoyeon.”

“The blonde girl?” I questioned.

“Yup, she wants to fight me for you.” Jessica laughed.

A silence passed before I said something that I probably should have thought about.

“You’d win.”

“Win what?” Jessica asked.

“The fight with Hyoyeon, you’d easily win.”

“I know I would. Nobody takes my girl away from me.”

I looked at her with a shocked expression. What just happened? Jessica called you her girl. I know that, but…why?

She released my hand from hers and threw an arm around my shoulder.

“N-no I didn't m-mean it like that! Friend, no one takes my friend away! I-I mean come on! We’ve obviously have grown so close. I-I automatically win!”

I nodded. “Automatically.” I repeated.

She retracted her arm and crossed her arms. “Y-you know what I meant, right?”

I nodded again. Jessica only sighed.

Silence had made its way back and Jessica was shifting uncomfortably.

Here we go, Taeyeon. You’ve been socially active for a while now, make use of what you’ve learned so far.

“I do have one other friend.”

Jessica brought her attention back to me. “You’ve already told me about Sunny.”

“No, it’s someone I haven’t mentioned before.”

“I’m listening.”

“Mr. Park is a mentor of mine. He’s like an uncle but not by blood. He usually made me feel better when all the other kids used to pick on me.”

“You were bullied?”

I nodded and smiled. “Almost every day.  I used to be a stuttering mess, more than now I guess. Nobody wanted to be friends with the kid who read books as much as I did. Whenever a teacher encouraged the class to read, they’d say that they didn’t want to end up like me. High school came around and it was worse.”

“What happened?”

I thinned my lips. “One day during class, a boy had asked me if I’d like to speak with him. I was thrilled that someone even wanted to talk to me, so I agreed. As I followed him out, someone pushed me from behind and lock the classroom door behind me. I got up and there was a circle of people surrounding me. One by one, they all had a negative thing to say about me. I was too nerdy, I was too isolated, I wasn’t good enough, I was trash, and my parents raised me to be a failure. By the time a teacher arrived, everyone had their laugh.”

“Where does Mr. Park some into this?”

“During that time, he used to motivate me. I’d come to him crying, saying that I’d run away from home than spend another second with those kids. I’d leave his side, understanding that running away from my problems wouldn’t solve a thing. That was a usual routine actually, I’d cry almost every day.”

“Everything you just told me sounds like such a traumatic experience, yet you haven’t cried one bit.”

“I cried enough during high school. I guess it’s just not worth it anymore.”

Jessica sighed. "Life gets really difficult sometimes, doesn't it?"

I nodded. 

"See, if Krystal had a legit reason for acting the way she is and being mad at me for a silly promise, then I'd be able to understand her. I'd be able to make her better."

I played around with the hem of my shirt. "You know what I still don't understand?"

"What?" Jessica responded. 

"You."

"W-what do you mean?"

I tugged on a loose string. "That day we met at the park, with Jonghyun and Simon, you sorta just... left me there."

Jessica was silent, so I continued. 

"A before that you were talking about how you wanted to get to know me better, about wanting to be one of my closest friends. When you left, that made me feel otherwise."

"First off, I'm sorry I made you feel that way." Jessica started. "Second, as you get to know me, you'll see that I have the patience and tolerance of a two year old."

I raised an eyebrow. "That's your excuse?"

Jessica laughed. "No. As you know, I'm not so keen about Jonghyun being anything other than a teacher. That day, he recommended to go on a double date, right?"

I nodded. 

"Well... I admit that I got sort of jealous."

What in the world is going on? How do I react to this? What do I say? How do I respond?

"Why?" With a question, of course.

She shrugged. "I honesty felt like he was taking you away from me. He was stealing my friend just to flirt with her. I didn't like that."

Flirt with me? Is she insane?! Why in the world would Jonghyun bother to... oh right. 

"S-still!" Oh, what's this?

"Still what?"

"Jealousy doesn't mean you can just leave me there. You know that I have a fear of rejection, so please, next time you feel the need to leave when we're together... take me with you." I mumbled the last part but she had heard me either way. 

She didn't say anything and there was no way I was going to look at her after saying what I did. I felt a mixture of emotions, mostly embarrassment. 

"I won't leave you anymore. If I do, I'll take you with me." Jessica finally said. 

"Really?" I turned to face her slowly. 

She smiled. "I promise."