Osteogenic sarcoma, also known as Osteosarcoma.

In other words, bone cancer.

No one likes to mention the C word in my house, but it's something that we have to talk about on a daily basis. And it's also something I've been dealing with since I was ten years old.

At the time, I had no idea what the hell they were talking about. I was just a kid, addicted to video games and wanting to hang out with my friends. But as I got older, I began to understand just how severe it all was.

When I was little, they described it to me in a way that when I think about it now, makes me want to choke the doctor for even daring to tel me such a lie. 

I was told, "There are these little armies running around inside your bones, and they're trying to shoot your insides. But don't worry! We're going to give you something that's going to kill that army, and you'll never be sick again!"

What a load of pure bull .

The reality of the situation was simply this: I was dying, and they didn't want to come right out and say it.

When I was old enough to finally understand this concept, I decided to do some digging of my own, considering my family wouldn't tell me anything. Thanks to the internet, I was able to find out some pretty interesting things about what was really going on inside my body.

Turns out, it was a lot more than a bunch of "little armies" going on in there. The fact of the matter was that there were a lot of medical terms that my mind probably couldn't comprehend at the time, so they used that to explain it to me.

My type of cancer was a bit more radical than most, and understanding it takes a while before it all makes sense.

The year after my ninth birthday, I began to complain a lot about pain in my body, and when I signed up for dance class, it got even worse. I was taking pain killers almost every hour because it was so bad.

After that, I started getting fractures in my bones, like I fell in dance class one time, and hurt myself really badly, aquiring a fracture in my bone. I've never actually broken a bone, but I have had more fractures than I can count.

After a series of imaging tests, bone x-ray's, MRIs, CTs, chest x-rays, bone scans, PET scans,  (You thought I was done? Ha! No.) a biopsy, needle biopsy, surgical biopsy (Not a fun experiecne, let me tell you) and lab tests, they discovered that I was a walking minefield.

They determined that I had stage one MS of osterosarcoma. Meaning that, for the the time being, I was okay. Nothing had spread, there were a few localized tumors that they removed, so that was a good thing. But it was still there.

You can have different grades of tumors in your body, ranging from highest to lowest. Mine, happened to be one of the second highest ones out there. A fancy word called, Telangiectatic, which is a subtype of Osteosarcoma. The tumor is in the Ewing Family of Tumors, which I will not go into. (It's to much work to explain)

Only hiccup was that they told my parents I had about five years to live. (JOY!) But with localized treatment, a little chemo therapy, and removal of three tumors on my knees, that I could add maybe two more years onto that. So I will have lived a grand total of seventeen years. (Even then, the odds were low)

What's funny about the whole thing, is it's not common cancer. There are roughly eight hundred new cases of osteosarcoma develop, four hundred of them in children and teens. Not to mention it's more common in males than in females. (Yay for me!) I grew relatively fast for my age, being almost five feet by the time I reached my tenth birthday, which wasn't normal for my age group.

There really isn't information on what causes my cancer, but they do know that thanks to my awesome genes, I inheirited this lovely disease from my parental units. (When they found out about it later, they felt horrible) I feel bad that they have to live with that knowledge, but there's really nothing I can do about it.

I knew all the facts, I knew all the statistics, I knew the risks. And the sad part of all of it was, I could do nothing about it. At some point in time, I was going to die, I just didn't know when.

I know this is also killing my family. My parents, my sister, even my poor dogs Jjanggu and Monggu can understand that I won't be there one day.

There are so many things I know, yet they don't make a difference. In the end, I'll be dead, my life will have ended as fast as it came. I could most likely be dead by the time I'm eighteen. I could have died sooner. I am going to die.

Wow. Now that's a scary thought.

I wish there were something I could do to change things. To take some of the pressure off my family, and the small group of friends that I have.

But the letter C isn't always the easiest thing to deal with.

~*~

I have been set up by many people in my life.

They told me, "You need to have a girlfriend!" (Yeah...that didn't go so well...)

Turns out, I like guys. Not girls.

So after I figured that out, they started setting me up with guys. .

It was possibly the worst experience of my life.

The first date, was this guy Suho. God, he was a tool. Cocky, thought he knew everything, and by the end of the night only tried to get in my pants a total of thirteen times. In the end, he walked me to my door, asked for a kiss and a second date. I kicked him in the balls and said, "Have a nice night!"

Second date, worse than the first. I had no idea that someone could be such a royal pain in the , but Byun Baekhyun takes the cake. I swear to God, I wanted to ring his scrawny neck before the night was over. (Plus, guys that wear makeup just aren't my thing)

Third date, not to bad. I didn't enjoy it, but it wasn't terrible. Chen was a nice guy, cute, but boy was he annoying! He wouldn't shut up, he literally talked my ear off. And he thought practical jokes were funny. Haha, no.

By the fourth date, I was ready to get up and leave. Park Chanyeol was the loudest, rudest, and most ignorant person that I've ever met in my entire life. I do believe that he's not all together, like something's missing up there.

So, to say the least, I gave up on dating. It's not like I would ever live to get married and have kids right? Who needs love?

There's no point in it any ways.

~*~

"Kai! My man! Listen, do I have news for you!" Sehun said happily, throwing his arm around my shoulder. I rolled my eyes as I reached into my back pack to take out some pain killers. My back had been killing me all day, and I needed some sort of relief.

"Sehun, I swear, if this has anything to do with a blind date, I will seriously punch you in the jaw." I replied to him, walking over to the water fountain. Sehun sighed,  removing his arm so I could take my pills. "Come on Kai, this could be the one! He's a great guy, just give him a chance." I swallowed a large gulp of water, letting the two blue tablets slide down my throat.

"I told you, I'm not doing blind dates any more. It's just not worth it. I'm going to die any ways, if you want to get me something get me another dog or a cat or something." I said, fixing my back pack on my shoulder again. Sehun means well, I know, but I can't take the set ups any more.

Sehun placed his hands on both of my shoulders. "You don't have to give me an answer. Just think about it, I'll send you his number, just shoot him a text! What's the harm in simply talking to him?" he asked. Sehun gave me his puppy eyes, poking out his lips in an adorable pout. It's really hard to say no to that face, so what choice did I have?

I let out a deep sigh, admitting my defeat. "Fine! Fine, text me the damn number." I said, turning around and heading to my class. I could feel the bad energy already, but Sehun is my best friend, so what the hell. He did have a point, there was no harm in calling him.

But what the hell am I suppossed to say?

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[A/N:]

So this idea came to me after reading a book, but this is going to be completely different. I hope you'll stick around to read it.

Thank you for reading the first chapter! Subscribe, up vote, comment for the comment ?

Saranghae!

-Kyla<3