And we intertwined our fingers, running back at the dormitory, laughing like school kids. I forgot about Seohyun, about my parents, about Donghae, I only cared about us. She smashed me against the door of the dark room of mine and we made love there and on the couch and on the bed.. in the bathroom. We made love, all night. I’ve never felt this good, I’ve never screamed someone else’s name like this. She made me see the stars and even more. I don’t know if we were together or not but we were together tonight and god knows how happiness found me.

I was sound asleep, even the sun couldn’t wake me up. Her arms were wrapping me, keeping me in a constant feeling of warmth. Everything just seemed perfect and calm till a knock on the door broke the silence, I opened one eye; maybe it wasn’t my door. I shifted a bit, my head hidden against Sooyoung’s hot neck and I fell back in wonderland but suddenly another knock and a voice that I perfectly know. Mom, it was my mother. I started to panic and tried to wake Sooyoung up.

“Soo ! My family is here.. just..” She fell on the floor, I pushed her without wanting and she growled in pain. She took her clothes and I lost it a second, looking voraciously at her back, damn I wasn’t realizing what just happened this night and I hadn’t time. My mother knocked again, I put on my jeans, tried to fix my hair and found a top that I put in no time. I rushed to the bathroom, just to be sure Sooyoung was in, hidden inside the shower and I smiled at her, this kind of smile that means that we are in deep but it’s gonna be okay. I closed the door after me and I went to the entrance. My room was little, a simple bed, a sofa and a desk, I just hope they won’t have the fabulous idea to visit the bathroom. I took a big inspiration and opened the door, smiling like nothing happened.

“My lovely girl !” My father took me in his arms, I wish I could just hug him like he deserves but I couldn’t, my mind was busy with too many thoughts of anxiety.

“Dad.. I’ve missed you..” He kissed my cheek before looking at me with his expressing eyes, he was happy to see me and that was what mattered. I looked at my mother, a thick smile hanging on her lips and she just patted my shoulder. She wasn’t cuddly but she knows that it’s important to show love. Sometimes I felt like my mother was taking my dad’s place and vice versa, people would find it weird but I am used to it. And now that I think of it, maybe this is why I found Sooyoung this attractive, she had something that my mother has too but I couldn’t point it out right now.

“Just come in, it’s a bit messy sorry” I closed the door behind them, scanning the room just to be sure we left no evidence of last night and I proposed them to sit on the sofa. It was a shame that I couldn’t offer them food neither drinks but it was a simple room for students, I just couldn’t do better.

“That’s okay, we won’t stay here anyway and we programmed many things with you today” For sure, I should have known. My father was an adventurer, he wanted to go everywhere so that’s why I wasn’t surprised by this discovery.

“But just before, can I use your bathroom ?” My mother asked. She approached the door and my mouth went dry. I needed to find a reason to dissuade her but there was just none. I stood up and opened my mouth but nothing came out, I just put myself in front of the door, creating a barrier. My mother looked at me a bit weirdly.

“Can’t I ?”

“Of.. course but..” She pushed me a bit, rude. But it’s the way she is and when you get old you care less and less. She opened the door and she came nose-to-nose with Sooyoung that wasn’t fully dressed. She was buttoning her jeans and her hair was messy. I was hoping for her to find an excuse but my mother just slowly turned her head to look at me, waiting for an explanation.

“What is happening ?” My dad couldn’t see from where he was seated but my mother did not waste her time to explain.

“The thing is that there’s a woman half inside the bathroom” But she wasn’t half , I took a quick glimpse inside the bathroom and Sooyoung was searching for words. It’s embarrassing, for her and for me, I suddenly felt ashamed to make her live this situation.

“Is she your roommate ?” Thanks god, dad you just saved us. It was logical, I could just have used this lie, it wasn’t that hard but when I panic I just can’t think straight.

“Yeah, for some days, she’s knew in here so accepted to share my room” My mother was still looking at me with a look that I couldn’t decipher. She’s not dumb, she knew there was something and that it was why I took some time to find a fake explanation but she told nothing. Sooyoung came out of the bathroom, my mother did not even dare looking at her and she closed herself inside the toilets.

“Hi Mister Jung, I am Choi Sooyoung” She was a bit nervous but my father smile cooled her down.

“Hi, nice to meet you, I hope that Jessica takes good care of you” I was blushing, damn. I closed my eyes before taking back my composure. Sooyoung hadn’t the time to answer, my mother came out of the bathroom and looked at me with coldness. It hurts.

“Well, I have to go, it was nice to meet you..” Sooyoung excused herself and went out of my room, leaving me alone with my family.

“Krystal will come next month but alone, she told us to tell you that she’s fine and that she loves you” At least she did not forgot me, she didn’t even wrote me a letter but I washed away all my thoughts, trying to concentrate a bit.

*****

It wasn’t summer anymore, it was cold and I loved it. Autumn was my favorite season, there’s something in the air that makes everything different, the odor of wood, the orange leaves, the rain. I was walking with my parents when we spotted a little coffee. We took place inside and ordered a hot chocolate. My father couldn’t stop smiling, it was nice to see him again. He was really supportive and just wanted to see me happy, my mother it’s something else. She kept quiet all day and that was what made me nervous.

“So, with DongHae ?” I totally forgot about him. I frowned and put down my cup. I folded my arms and looked somewhere else, stupid idea. They know me by heart and by acting this way I was giving them the answer.

“But I heard that you were getting married” What ? I never heard something like that, who could have told them this lie.

“No, who told you this ?” My attention was suddenly taken by my mother words. She smiled, was she playing with me ? She used to be stubborn and a bit arrogant but she never had this attitude.

“Your boyfriend’s parents, isn’t it the case ?” She took an arrogant tone and even my dad was taken aback. We looked at her with an expression of total incomprehension but she didn’t noticed it or maybe she did not cared.

“We broke up” I simply stated and I saw my mother’s smile disappearing. It was the first I was feeling happy to see it, she wasn’t really kind today and I just wished that since we exchanged some words by telephone she would have calmed down but there’s this little something in her, she constantly needed to find my weak spots.

“Oh, why ?”
“Because I don’t love him anymore” It was simple and it was the truth. The shortest it is, less people ask about it. My father took my hand and gently hold it, he was sorry. My mother was still stunned, she wasn’t showing it but by her absence of words I just guessed.

“As long as you’re fine with it..” She finally said. I know that she had high hopes about us, she wanted me to get married very soon and wasn’t expecting a brake up.

“Of course she’s fine with it” As always my hero talked and gave me a smile, the same he used to give me when I was younger. I missed it, I missed him and his support, it felt good even if Madam was having a weird behavior.

*****

I was spacing out, my mind totally not aware of what was happening around me. We were Sunday but I had class, it was a special week and we needed to end a project for Christmas. Mine ? I still did not found and there was tree hours left, I just couldn’t concentrate. Hyoyeon was running everywhere, talking and talking so I just went back to my class room to think but it did not help.

“Jessica ?” I look back, it was a boy that shared the same class with me. I just frowned and he went away, weird. I went back to what I was doing, looking at the nothingness when Hyoyeon ran to me, she was breathing heavily and looked worried.

“Are you okay ?” What was happening ? I frowned again, suddenly everyone was acting weird and it made me feel bad, my own breathing started to race and I didn’t even know why.

“Your locker.. didn’t you.. come ! You have to see it !” My locker ? Again ? It couldn’t be worse than the last time. Hyoyeon took my hand and we headed to my locker, it was insane. She’s mine, was written in red against my locker. I did not understand the words, what does it mean ? Everyone looked at me, yeah because the whole class came to see what was happening.

“What does it mean.. ?” Hyoyeon put her hand against my shoulder, she was smiling ? Yes she was really smiling, maybe she found it interesting and that she could play Sherlock for a few days but this whole story was seriously starting to bother me. I bit my lower lip and then approached my locker, it wasn’t open so it’s just a tag, a simple tag done by a hater ? I did not know how to call this.. person. I turned my head to look at my blond friend and asked her some help.

“Yes of course, after class I can help you, we will remove this big.. thing” she said while showing me with disgust and admiration ? The tag.

It took only a minute for everyone to go away, I was now alone with my thoughts and without surprise, Sooyoung came to my mind. She’s mine. Is there something doing with her ? Or with me ? I didn’t know for who it was, the person that is mine or just me, I am hers or his. I was confused, if only I had clue or something. Fortunately, the end of the afternoon came quickly, I had a project to catch up and it was sufficient to keep my mind busy. I finally found a subject for Christmas and even if it wasn’t the best, at least I won’t have a zero and that was the most important.

“Hey, I only have an hour so let’s just start now okay ?” As promised, Hyoyeon came after our work to my locker and helped me to get rid of this tag. I was just mindlessly washing it with a sponge, those one made in metal and that scratch the material. It would surely leave marks but it was the only way to erase it and anyway we were going to paint it in blue later.

“Do you know who could have done it ?” Another question that I am searching for an answer too. I put down the sponge and let myself fall on the ground, tired of all this work. Hyoyeon just squatted down and looked at me, she wasn’t smiling this time but she felt concerned, she knew that someone wanted to.. humiliate me or something.

“No, no idea..” I sighed and she massaged a bit my shoulder, she tried to relax my nerves but I wasn’t tense, just tired. I was left in total lack of understanding.

“Need help ?” I raised my head, it was Sooyoung. She wasn’t smiling because she guessed what happened, exactly the same scenario than the last time.

“If you don’t mind.. I need to go and this little head needs help to finish all of this.. mess” It had already been an hour that we were erasing the tag and repainting it, Hyoyeon needed to go home and Sooyoung just came at the right time.

“I don’t mind” And Hyoyeon left us after patting Sooyoung’s shoulder. We were alone in the corridor, it was kind of weird. We didn’t talk about yesterday’s accident so we were both searching for what to say, do we kiss ? Do we just hug or not even. It was the first time I just wanted her presence and nothing more, I guess that I was really getting tired of this bullying thing if it was one.

“What was written against your locker this time ?” She sat next to me, putting down her bag.

“She’s mine..”

We stayed there, just looking at the locker without saying a thing, the tint of paint next to us. We were thinking, I am sure she was thinking too and our thoughts weren’t directed about what happened today but about what happened last night. Finally I turned my head to look at her, and I shivered, she was staring back at me. There was no one in the corridor so we instantly closed the gap between our lips and kissed, slowly, our tongues brushing against each other with shyness. I felt like it was the first time we did it, my hand found her cheek and we deepened the kiss, our mouth devouring each other as my body started to completely face hers. It did not took time for me to be locked between her legs, her hands on my hips as we were making out on the corridor, the only sound coming from our mouths and our breathings. My heart was beating fast, I wanted more but we had to stop, it wasn’t the right place neither the right time but someone else stopped us and that was what made us both separate in an abrupt way. I pushed myself far away from Sooyoung but it was too late, Hyoyeon saw us and she was looking at us like we were ghosts.

“It’s..” I started but she cut me.

“I just forgot my bag.. inside my.. well see you tomorrow..” And she walked away, I couldn’t put a finger on what she was thinking but I did not see disgust inside her eyes but surprise and I hope I was right. She was my only friend in class and I didn’t want it to change.

_________________________________

Hi guys, a little chapter but I can't do better ! Sorry ! I try first to give a good quality since I am French you know.

Sorry for the long absence, I will try to post.. twice a month and maybe longer chapters but the story is slowly reaching its end and I need your opinions about how you found this chapter and what you want me to improve !

Thank you again !