Jeongguk was sitting on the sofa in a room that he found familiar. He looked to the right and found a clock hung at the wall. It was 2AM. He saw a man came into the room, the man was shouting, but Jeongguk couldn’t hear anything, everything was mute for him. The man was his father. His father was wearing a suit. He had loosened his necktie. Few minutes later, there a woman figure catching up to his father. The woman was still young, so was his father. The woman wore a beautiful, ocean blue dress. The woman hadn’t wiped off her make up after the party. The woman was on her knees, begging forgiveness from the man. The man was sitting in his work chair; his back facing the woman. As the woman said something, the man faced her, with anger written on his face. The man slapped the woman. Soon, the slap turned into abuse. Jeongguk couldn’t help himself to look away from the scene and his eyes caught a little boy figure behind the door, peeking at the sadistic view. Tears slipped from the boy’s eyes. The little boy was him. Jeongguk looked at the scene again as the five-year-old Jeongguk’s eye widen. The woman was full of scars, blood coming out from her head. She coughed blood. The woman crawled to the man. She hugged the man, kissed him on the cheek and whispered something. The man’s eye became teary as he saw the woman kill herself. At the same time, Jeongguk closed his eyes and when he opened his eyes again he found himself panting on his bed. He looked to the clock, 6 in the morning. He closed his eyes and laid on his bed again, trying to forget his nightmare.

---

On the other side of Seoul, Yoonmi barely slept. She was still thinking about if she should go to the place that just brought sadness to her. She didn’t want to remember those things. It’s just made her life go slower.

“You should have died rather than ruin my family!” An old woman shouted at the innocent little girl. The little girl was surrounded by two women that wore luxurious clothes. The one who was really old, was the mother of the little girl’s father, but the one still in her mid 30s was the grandmother’s daughter-in-law. Then a woman in maid clothes came toward them and bowed to the women. The woman in the maid uniform looked at the little girl who knew nothing. The little girl didn’t know anything until she was five.

Yoonmi’s thought stopped recalling her past when she noticed her phone vibrating. She received a text. It was Taehyung. As usual, Taehyung never failed to do sweet things to Yoonmi. He never forgot to send her a morning text which Yoonmi found cute. Usually, it was random; like he had a stomachache,or Jinhee had been begging him to play with Jaewon or he was lazy to go to school.

Thank you for the porridge. It’s tasty, but I would be tastier if you fed me :p

“CHEESSY!!” Yoonmi laughed at the text and replied before getting up. Yoonmi walked to the living room and did her chores as usual.

---

Areum was in a shopping center in Japan. It’s a routine for her to go shopping if she was out of Korea. That’s why Jeongguk was too lazy to come to Japan since he was only needed to accompany Areum. Areum was quite worried about Jeongguk, It’s today.

Hey, are you okay? Are you going to go there this year?

Areum tapped her fingers on the clothes shop’s counter. She looked across the shop. There are so many people walking in the street. There are so many couples walking in the street, holding hands. Seeing that, her mind flew to Jeongguk. She asked herself, why Jeongguk never looked at her in that way. Why don’t you ever look at me, Jeon Jeongguk?

---

Yoonmi was standing in a pretty large house. She straightend up her coat and knocked the door. No answer. She knocked again, still no answer. A sigh escaped her lips as she pulled out her phone. She called a number.

“Hey, ah. Yes. It’s okay.” Then the call was dismissed. It’s a short call since both of them were pretty straight-forward. Then a sleepy Jeongguk welcomed her. Jeongguk had on a wifebeater and navy training pants and ruffled his hair. From Yoonmi assumptions, he had just woke up from sleeping. She could tell that Jeongguk had barely sleep since he had eye bags and dark circles. Jeongguk let her in. The house was clean, and…quiet. Is there no one home? Is he crazy?! Two teenagers in his house, alone?!  Yoonmi’s mind became a mess, but she kept her poker face.

“My parent are in Japan now. It’s okay, I won’t do anything to you. Yoonmi raised her eyebrows at Jeongguk’s sudden statement. It’s like he could read her mind. Jeongguk checked his phone, he got a text from Areum. He raised an eyebrow and typed ‘No.’ Then he put his phone back at his pocket.

“Wait here, I’m going to bring my stuff here and by the way, thanks for your scarf yesterday. Here.” Jungkook gave the scarf back and left Yoonmi in the living room. The living room was comfy, the paint was grey and there was a garden next to the living room. She could see the green garden though the glass. She put her things on the table there and sat at the couch, facing the television. Under the television, there was a rack for the CDs and there was a photo there. Yoonmi went closer so she could see it better. It’s Jeongguk’s family photo. Is he always this stoic? But there was another photo. It was when Jeongguk was around four; he was smiling brightly. He should smile more.

“You ready?” Jeongguk’s hoarse voice distracted Yoonmi. Jeongguk already changed to a black shirt but still in his training pants. Yoonmi just nodded and went to the small table. After that, neither of them talk. It was dead silent. Yoonmi shifted her sight to the garden or to the table, avoiding Jeongguk’s gaze on her.

“So, what are we going to paint?” Jeongguk cleared his throat before speaking. Yoonmi started to talk about the project. She already mapped out the idea before she went to Jeongguk’s house. Jeongguk just nodded and gave some of his ideas. So finally, they decided to make a diorama. The setting was a living room with an antique brown wallpaper. There’s going to be a purple sofa in the middle. Above the sofa, a old clocked that pointed at 12 hung at the wall. It’s at night since the sky outside the window is going to be dark. They painted the background dark blue with moon light. At the sofa, a kid sat nicely there. The kid was waiting.

“Let’s work on it!” Yoonmi smiled in  satisfaction since she thought it would turn out great. As Jeongguk saw Yoonmi smile, he immediately smiled too. The one who was in charge of the living room structure, scale and so on was Jeongguk. The one who painted it was Yoonmi. The only thing that Jeongguk wanted to paint was the kid, since it was his idea.

---

It has been three hours of working. Jeongguk already made the living room structure, so it’s Yoonmi’s turn to paint. Since it was a natural talent that Yoonmi had, it was easy for her to paint. Her painting was so realistic that made Jeongguk stare in awe. Now Jeongguk was focused on his own job. He made the kid with clay. Jeongguk was good at art too, not good as Yoonmi of course. But, out of all of his friends, he was the best. His mind was distracted as he started to paint the clay.

The little Jeongguk couldn’t sleep. He flipped to the left and right. He had a bad feeling  about today, no, it should be tonight since it barely hit 12. He sat at his bed, looked at his clock and stood up, deciding to wait for his parents, who were out partying, downstairs. He sat on the sofa, waiting for the elders to get home. His parents took a long time to come back home; even little Jeongguk already fell asleep twice. Soon, he heard the sound of the car engine. He smiled since his parents were home. But his smile faded as he heard his father shouting. Because he was scared, he hid in the kitchen. Even though he hid, he still could hear his parents argument.

“IT’S YOUR FAULT! YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE BEEN THERE!” The man’s shouting voice scared the little Jeongguk. Little Jeongguk closed his eyes. He didn’t want to see what his father would do next. His father slapped his mother. It was normal for his father to abuse his mother when he was stressed. But what could he do? He was just five years old. After his father abused his mother, usually Jeongguk always went to his mother and hugged her. Little Jeongguk’s actions gave his mother strength. But today, Jeongguk had a really bad feeling. He was scared that he couldn’t hug his mother this time.

“IT’S YOUR FAULT! IF YOU WEREN’T CARELESS! IF YOU DIDN’T GET PREGNANT WE WOULDN’T BE TOGEHTHER AND I WOULD BE WITH HYEJOONG!!” Usually, Jeongguk’s father’s words never affected him, but this, the words rang clearly in his ears. The little Jeongguk froze in his spot. He knees became weak. He couldn’t hear anything anymore. He didn’t follow his parents who were still arguing upstairs. I’m an unwanted child? An illegitimate son? Jeongguk shook his head and tried to catch up t his parents who were in their room. When he got there, all he could see was his dead mother.

Without Jeongguk realizing, a tear slipped from his eyes. His mind was a mess. It always happened when it was the anniversary of his mother’s death. That’s why he never wanted to go to her grave since it only brought back his past. The clay fell from his grip which made Yoonmi stop working. They were sitting with their backs facing each other. All Yoonmi could see was Jeongguk’s trembling back. She went closer to him and put her hand on his shoulder.

“Are you okay?” Yoonmi’s voice made Jeongguk turn his head, facing the girl with teary eyes. Yoonmi was surprised with this other side of Jeongguk. He never showed this part of him to anyone, not even with his friends. Yoonmi could see sadness in Jungkook eyes. Not just sadness but there was guilt and anger and loneliness all mixed together. All Yoonmi could do was hug him and pat his back. Due to Yoonmi’s action, Jeongguk cried even more.

“Shh, it’s okay. It’s okay.” Yoonmi still hugged Jeongguk and patted his back. They were in this position for about fifteen minutes. Jeongguk’s cries went down, but they were still in the same position, enjoying each other comfort. The warmth spread over their bodies. Jeongguk could smell Yoonmi’s peach scent and she could smell Jeongguk’s mint scent. Niether of them wanted to leave that position, if they could, they would stop time. But, everything comes to an end. Yoonmi’s phone rang and which made both of the teenagers straighten their sitting position. Yoonmi took out her phone. It was a call from Taehyung. She gave Jeongguk sign asking if she could answer the call. He nodded.

“Hey, Ah. Now? Hmmm.” Yoonmi was in deep thought. I can’t leave him like this.

“I’m sorry, but can it be tomorrow? Yes, okay, see you then.” She decided to reject Taehyung’s offer to go out. She couldn’t leave Jeongguk alone in this state. He was vulnerable and fragile.

“You can leave. I’ll do the rest alone. I’m sorry for the trouble.” Jeongguk wanted Yoonmi to leave soon because he let his guard down. He let her see the other side of him. He thought it wasn’t cool that a boy cried in front of a girl, especially if it’s the girl that he was interested in. If he could, he would back time.

“It’s okay, I’ll help you finish the rest. And it’s okay for you to cry. Today must be the anniversary of the death of someone that you love very much.” Yoonmi’s words were like a bullet that hit Jeongguk’s chest. No, not just chest, but mind as well. It’s like she could read his mind, no—his past. Noticing that Jeongguk’s mind was having an internal battle, Yoonmi went to kitchen. She looked in the refrigerator and found chocolate. She melted the chocolate and mixed it with the milk.

“Here, you will feel better.” Yoonmi came with a glass of hot chocolate. She smiled at him. That smile was the most sincere smile that she has ever given him. The smile made his mind find peace. Jeongguk just stared at Yoonmi eyes that were full of sincerity. He accepted the hot chocolate and drank it. Drinking the hot chocolate that Yoonmi gave, reminded him of his mother that used to give him hot chocolate whenever he was sad. Jeongguk bit his lips, preventing the sadness from coming again.

“I’ll continue the work, you should rest up your mind. If you want to talk, I’m here.” Yoonmi led Jeongguk to the couch, leaving the boy frozen under her touch. After leaving Jeongguk on the couch, Yoonmi continued the project. No one spoke, until Jeongguk decided to break the silence. He wanted to cleanse his mind by talking to Yoonmi. He thought Yoonmi was trustworthy enough.

“Today is the day my mom died.” Jeongguk’s words weren’t a surprise to Yoonmi. She was able guess it, but how his mother was like and why she died was still a mystery to her.

“She died when I was five and at around that time, I found out that I was an unwanted child.” A wave of sadness washed over Yoonmi. It’s too similar to her. Guilt crept over her because she felt she was making him tell his story. Remembering something like that was so hurtful. Yoonmi really knew what it felt like.

“Even though my mother was my father fiancée, he still didn’t love her. He abused her, every day, every night. I couldn’t do anything but hug her after my father abused her. But that day, I was so useless. I didn’t do anything. I let my mother die. I couldn’t help her that day. Even though I already have a mother--the woman that my father truly loves--she can’t replace my real mother, even though there was no love between my real mother and my father.” Jeongguk placed the hot chocolate on the table as he stood up.

“I’m so sorry for her, and for you too. Have you visited her?” Yoonmi had just finished the project. She put it on the table.

“No. It reminds me of the pain.” Yoonmi raised her eyebrows, wait, why is he so similar to me. Yoonmi started to clean the floor. Jeongguk lend his hand and they cleaned the living room together.

“You should. She has been waiting for you.” The room was clean again. There was just Yoonmi and Jeongguk. He bit his lip, considering Yoonmi’s suggestion. It was true that Jeongguk wanted to visit his mother, he wanted to talk to her, he wanted to tell his mother what he has been through.

“I will accompany you.” Those four words from Yoonmi could made Jeongguk decide. What he needed was Yoonmi’s company.

“Let’s go then.”

---

Jeongguk and Yoonmi walked to the graveyard Jeongguk’s mother was in. The weather was chilly, perfect for visiting the one who you loved. Visiting Jeongguk’s mother grave made Yoonmi wanted to go to her mother’s. His real mother was pretty, her smile was genuine. Jeongguk kneeled in front of the grave. Yoonmi put the flowers down and prayed before leaving Jeongguk alone. Seeing Jeongguk already in his own world, Yoonmi left him alone.

---

It was already 6PM. Yoonmi got back to Jeongguk who was still kneeled down next to his mother’s grave. Jeongguk’s eyes looked drained, but filled with satisfaction and happiness. He was happy that he could talk to his mother.

“Are you done?” Yoonmi’s voice made Jeongguk smile. Hearing his soon-to-be girl’s voice made his heart beat uncontrollably. Yoonmi went closer to Jeongguk and gave him a hot coffee.

“Let’s go home.” Jeongguk stood up and led the way. The walk was quiet, both of them enjoying each other’s company. Soon, the road was crowded since people were coming back from work. Jeongguk held Yoonmi’s hand tightly, not wanting to lose her. He pulled her closer to him, leaning forward.

“Want to eat?” Yoonmi was surprised by Jeongguk’s sudden action. Her face was red, her heart beating fast. All she could do was nod. Then Jeongguk dragged her to a restaurant. Not so fancy, it was a western restaurant. They sat near the window, searching for the menu. Yoonmi gulped as soon as she saw the menu. Why so freaking expensive?! Yoonmi’s family was quite rich, but she wasn’t used to spending her money.

“It’s okay. Today is my treat. You accompanied me today.” Jeongguk’s eyes didn’t leave the menu, but his word were like he read her mind. Why can this boy easily read my mind?! Soon they chose their food. The silence was killing Jeongguk. It’s the first time that he wanted to speak. He cleared his throat.

“Yoonmi-ssi. Can we be friends?” Yoonmi just raised her eyebrows. It was very awkward for them. Jeongguk asked because they automatically became friends since they hang out in the same group, but they never officially became friends, so Jeongguk wanted to do it now.

“Yes, so...can we drop the formalities?” Jeongguk’s lips immediately switched up. A smile plastered on his face.

“Of course we can, Yoonmi-ah.” Jeongguk felt weird having ‘Yoonmi-ah’ come from his lips, but Yoonmi found it perfect to hear.

“Yes, Jeongguk-ah. And can we talk comfortably?” It’s wasn’t just Jeongguk who wanted to be friends with Yoonmi, but vice versa. She found his company was nice. She enjoyed it even if it’s just a silence. On contrary to Areum, who couldn’t bear the silence between her and Jeongguk, instead, she found it awkward.

“Yes, yes, yes.” Today Yoonmi learned many things about Jeongguk. She found he was adorable when he was smiled. She found he was straight forward. She found he was vulnerable when it came to his past. After that, Jeongguk didn’t hesitate to talk more. At the rate he was talking, he couldn’t be compared to the others, even Taehyung. When they talked, they just asked each other a few things, like how was school or where Yoonmi’s parent were.

“Your food.” The waiter came with the food. Both of them had different meals. They even shared their food. Somehow Yoonmi felt weird, how she came could to be this open with Jeongguk when he was the one that she most recently became friends with. She didn’t smile this much when she was with the others, not even with Taehyung. But for some reason, she felt this was wrong, since Jeongguk was Areum’s.

“What happen?” Jeongguk waved his hand. He just came back after paying the bill. Yoonmi shook her head and stood up.

“Let’s go home.” Jeongguk just nodded at Yoonmi’s word and both of them left the restaurant. They walked into the chilly night. Winter was near. After minutes of walking, they arrived at Yoonmi’s place. Before letting she go in, Jungkook grabbed her hand. His cold hand met hers.

“Thank you for today. It meant a lot to me.” Jungkook gave her a sincere smile. She was surprise by his smile. She could see the sincerity in his eyes.

“It’s okay, no problem. That’s what friends are for. You can talk to me whenever you want.” Yoonmi replied with her smile. Her smile made his heart and mind feel at peace.

“Jung—“ “Yoo—” Both of them were going to speak at the same time. Yoonmi looked away as they spoke.

“You first.” Being a gentleman, Jeongguk let the her speak first.

“Hm...I just want to tell you that it would be good if you try to love your mother now—even it’s hard. There are many people who are dying for love.” Yoonmi’s word struck Jeongguk hard. He never wanted to love his current mother since she couldn’t replace his real mother. Yoonmi’s word just made him think. Jeongguk’s nod made Yoonmi smiled a bit.

“Now what did you want to say?” Now was the time that Jeongguk asked.

“Where did you go when you left me alone?” Curiosity could be heard in his voice. It’s true, Jeongguk was wondering where she went when he was alone. Yoonmi bit her lips before answering his question. She couldn’t open up that fast, but it was unfair to Jungkook. She knew everything about him but he knew nothing.

“I visited my mother.” A bitter smiled plastered on Yoonmi’s face. Jeongguk froze as he heard Yoonmi’s words. Is her mother dead too?

“See you next time, Jungkook-ah.” Yoonmi’s voice rang in his ears, distracting his mind. This time, it was Jeongguk who was the one who waited for her to go in. After her figure went in, he walked home with so many questions filling his mind.

Author Note!

Yeay! Sorry for not updating last week, i just had my final exam (really final exam since im in senior year) and i still need to face the national exam on April 14. It isnt going to be one month! D-28! BUT! Tomorrow, i get my holiday. So the case was like this,

my teacher asked me, if its better if theres no school for the senior since they just finished the exams. At first, i said, YES MISS YESSS! But, then i realized my grades werent that good so as my friends, and i told her that it would be better if we go to school, since we need to sprit since there's no time again but let us come in 8 or 9. hahahahaha, and she said, she will think it again. And two days ago, they(teachers) told us that we have holiday on mon and tue. Hahahaha! it feels heaven!

So, since i have my holiday, i will try to update within mon or tue. And i just check the ff and i see the subcribers increase!! YAY THANKYOU SO MUCH DEAR! And there's upvote too!!! Omg thank you for Kirstyw! And sorry, if the story line goes so slow. Please comment on the story, so i know what are you thinking abt the story.

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