When she was discharged from the hospital, things were not improving. She would eat, but only because Luhan coaxed her to. She spent the rest of her days holed up inside the nursery.

The only room that was locked up, turned out to be the supposed nursery for their unborn baby. And she collapsed to her knees once she step her foot into the room.

It hurt so much. Felt like her heart was drained and barren. Oh, how she would want to take her heart out to ease the pain. As she would then remember, she remembered the day that she found out that she was pregnant.

FLASHBACK

“Argh...this is killing me.” The bathroom had been her bestfriend for the past 2 hours, witnessing the horror of her retching into the toilet bowl. Well, that’s goodbye to the delicious Mac n Cheese last night. She wiped her face for the ninth time and walked out of the bathroom. ‘Ahhhhh...fresh air~’

Gulping a glass of water, she decided to watch some TV and catch up on some drama that she missed due to a concert preparation for JYP Family. Eventhough she love her job so much, but it can be very demanding and tiring. She was so glad to have some time for herself and her husband. Plus, the house was getting messier. Luhan, well, took the idea of manliness too far. It was basically becoming a man cave.

Getting comfortable on the sofa, she browsed through the channels and settled for The Return of Superman. She had always loved children, maybe because of her past. But with Luhan’s schedules and her career, child bearing seemed to be delayed. After fangirling and cooing so hard at the babies on screen, she decided that a hearty lunch box would be nice for the EXO boys.

It was not until Luhan came back and found her passed out on the kitchen floor that they know (the doctor confirmed it). That they got another Lu coming.

And Luhan’s shout of ‘Who’s the man? I’M THE MAN!!!’ roared through the corridors of the hospital with Aeyoung trying to sneak out with being seen with an embarrassing Luhan. But as he cuddled her close that night, she wouldn’t mind calling him her man.

PRESENT TIME

“Young-ah~” A distinct voice called out to her from the other side of the door. Quickly wiping away stray tears on her cheeks, she opened the door to her soulmate, Xiumin.

“Hello, oppa. Luhan did not mention that you are coming.” She carved out a forced smile and gave him a small hug. Xiumin smiled tenderly at her and embraced her lightly.

“I don’t need him to see my soulmate, am I? Plus I did texted you just now. If you did pay attention.” A sheepish smiled adorned her face at that. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. Besides, I texted you as soon as I arrived at your car park. I knew I am always welcomed here.” He winked and made himself comfortable on the rocking chair in the nursery, while she sat on the lilac sofa just adjacent to it.

“What’s up, oppa?” I am sorry that I did not visit you guys for a while.” She looked up to him only to see him observing her with such intensity that made her anxious.

“I am here to see you, of course. And to see Kim Ae Young.”

“What do you mean? I am her. Is there any impostor that I should know?” Her wrinkles deepen with that.

“You know that I know you were just crying before you opened the door just now, right? You know the reason why we are called soulmate, right? And you do know that Luhan almost leave me out of your wedding because he is jealous of us, then and now?” She closed her eyes, took a deep breath and nodded.

“So you tell me, where is The Kim Aeyoung that I used to know?” Silence filled every inch of the room with a certain heaviness hanging around. Tears once again began to blurred her sight. Taking a deep breath, she started, “Oppa,I...”

“No, listen. Young, I love you. You know I do. But, you have to understand that I had given you more than enough time. I have waited for you to talk to me. I expected that. But I do not expect Luhan to walk around like a zombie and silence from you. That’s why I am here today.”

“It is... it is just so hard, oppa. Please...”

“I know you know that what needs to be done. So here I am, to voice it out loud for you. But first, let it out to me.”

She could feel her heart constricted into nothingness, the hollowness deepened with each breath that she took. But when she took a look at him, she could see an anchor that would always keep her at bay, whatever happens. Min Joon was her brother, forever and always. Luhan was her love, her protector and her home. But Xiumin was a part of herself that she needs to keep her sane. From herself and her own destructive thoughts. And she realized that he was right.

“Oppa, it hurts so, so much. She was all I had ever wanted in life, so why did God took her away from me? Why? It was my entire fault. I knew that I should have stayed home.  I knew I was being a . I was not the nicest one around. Is it my karma then? Then take me, instead. Why her? WHY???” She broke down.

“I had so much to do for her. So much love to give to her. So why, oppa? Luhan is going to hate me. I am not capable of being a mother, am I? Is that why? Is that why she was taken away?” And Xiumin stayed by her side. Listening and embracing her tight, so that she would stay intact. Even if her heart is broken beyond repair.

“Young, look at me and listen. There are no other women out there that I know would be a better mother than you. You have a heart full of love solely for that. Your child would be blessed for being yours.”

“But she had done her part. She had been a part of your life and would be waiting for you on the other side. You know she would never come back.”

“But look around you. I know there’s a wall around you from you past. But it’s not the reason to be selfish. Look at Luhan. It you didn’t notice, he hardly ate. He hardly sleeps. Plus, we have to practice for the upcoming award performances. Hell, I think you eat more than him these few weeks because he was so worried in taking care of you. While at the same time, doing a very good job in neglecting himself. He suffered too. She was his daughter too. And only God knows how he blames himself all the time.”

“Young-ah, you lost a daughter. Would you want to lose your love too?” Xiumin took her face in his hands and forced her to look at him.

“You are being selfish right now. Wake up.”

A/N: I dont even qualified to say sorry for my absence :(

Long story short, I got a job and it took away my virtual life. :'(

BTW, the story is set with no changes in EXO whatsoever k?