Suddenly  a light wrapped the both of you and soon as it came it disappeared letting another lamp came and  go like the other.  You sought the source of it while you were still in the same position.

You were surprised to find the photographer in his knees. He was taking photos of the two of you with a big smile printed on his face. He stopped doing that once he realized that the two of you were looking at him like it was a crazy man.

He laughed " Oh sorry guys, but you had that kind of chemistry….. It was…that moment just now …was …..WOW!" the photographer Kang was known not only cause of his wonderful capacity of making everything captured by his camera look like it came directly from heaven but also because of his exuberant personality.

You let your arms fall from Kai's neck giving him a quick gaze. Kai followed your actions and let you go but his eyes didn't let your face.

" I am right guys, am I not?" asked Mr. Kang addressing to the audience behind him.  Of course the audience were Exo's members. Like always luck was never on your side. You could feel Sehun gaze on you but you decided to not look at him. As much as usual he would have had his indifferent look.

You sighed " I was just doing my work Mr. Kang. Don't misunderstand."

He got up " oh I know, I know. You are the best at doing your work. Anyway for today I have to ask you to take a break and don't work. " Your eyes widened.  Oh, wait. He must hate me. How dare he tell me to not work? He doesn't want to work with me or what? What an arrogant jerk.

You frowned but before you could open your mouth he talked again.

" Don't worry it's just for today. I want you to be my model today." he closed his announcement with a playful smile.

Wtf?!  " Sorry Mr. Kang but you already have Taeyeon as model for today"

" oh, that's not a problem she will be paired with Sehun. Since they are perfect together." you pressed your lips in a line trying to control your feelings. You looked down, an desperate smirk formed at the corner of your lips.  Perfect….

You putted your mask on again and looked at the photographer that was still talking " I can't let you stay unknown this time. Even now….looking at the two of you…. You have this aura…. Words can't explain it."

You looked at Kai. He had the same look on his face like you had. Both your faces were saying wtf is he talking about?!

Abruptly someone took your hands in his.  You turned to meet Mr.Kang's face.

" Please, please I can't let you go without making other photos of you. " his eyes were begging you like it was the last wish of a man that was going to die.

"Please Jinmin-sshi after all today is Christmas! "  You knew very well that it was Christmas in fact you were mad because you had to work even for Christmas. You wanted to go to the hospital to celebrate it with Maru but you were stuck there.  So after work you would been forced to run to the hospital to visit your brother in normal times like normal people do. The idea of running with the snow and cold worried you because since you were young the cold weather made you have asthmas attacks. Your asthma wasn't so serious because the attacks were rare but the intensity was too deep so you had to be careful on winter.

"Okay Mr. Kang I will be your model but what about letting us go home earlier? It's Christmas after all…. Like you said…" 

He smiled happily  and said " Yes! Of course!!!!"  he let your hands and took a hand of Kai " Hey, Romeo! Stop looking like that at your Juliet! I can tell that you like the idea of the two of together so I won't ask if you are okay with that."

Kai eyes widened and he worried looked at you.  "I …..I wasn't.."

" yes, of course you weren't!" Mr. Kang sarcastically  said.

You just smiled at the two of them.

______::::::::::::________________________________________________________________________

You were going to change when someone behind you cleared his throat. You turned to see a frowned Sehun.

" you are attracted by Kai now? "  you couldn't help but smile. In your head there was the idea of him being jealous. You liked so much that idea.

"Do I really have to answer that? "

" Yes, because….."

"Because what?"  the situation was just to funny for you. You confessed to him the day before how could he even think that you liked Kai?

"Because…."  Kai likes you…  "Nothing…. I was just curious." he said letting his hand pass through his hair.

" Well I don't want to talk about this" you said turning you back to him and continue walking.

Sehun followed you " Jinmin! You said that we are friends! You should tell this things to a friend! "

You laughed he was just to cute. " No I shouldn't. At least not to you!"

He blocked your path " Why?"

" Stop it Jong suk! "  

Sehun's expression darkened.

Jong suk?.... Ops….

" you know what? to tell the truth I was just concerned."  what the was that supposed to mean?

"What?"

" I am okay if you like Kai. " his eyes were so cold " I was concerned because if that is a plan to make me jealous it will only end with you being hurt. " you snorted listening to his arrogant words. You got mad really mad.

" Sehun I think I made a mistake asking you to be friends. You and I, we both know that this friendship has to end here. " His cold expression turned into painful confusion, but he didn't talk.

" As you see we argue every time we see  each other. We can't be friends." those words even if they were told by you they hurt you too much. You didn't want to end it like this but….  " You continue to hurt my pride because you know how I feel about you….and I…. I hate it. "

You passed him and entered into the dressing room. 

"Wait, Jinmin! " he said entering the room too. You looked at him with teary eyes while he was closing the door.  When he faced you again a tear let your eyes. He immediately run to you he caressed your face " Hey, hey…." you didn't want to look in his eyes " hey look at me. We can be friends! I won't hurt you again. I promise." you slowly looked at him. He was looking deeply in your eyes waiting for you to talk.

"I promise Jinmin-ah." he looked at your lips before leaning in and slowly kiss you. You couldn't resist but kiss him back.  Jerk…

With his forehead touching yours  he looked at you " This is not the end for us" his voice was so sincere. You couldn't help but trust him.

You wanted to trust him.

You frowned "since when friends kiss each other??" he chuckled letting his hands embrace you.

"Sorry. So we are friends, right?" you nodded " Okay then what are you doing today after work?"

__________::::::::::::::::::::_____________________________________________________________

You were walking down the hospital corridor with Sehun next.

"So? How was to be a model for a day?" you raised your shoulders as a sign of indifference.

"Not bad"

"Next time we should do that together" he simply said as if there would have been definitely a second time.

You stopped in front of your brother's room and before opening you said " Next time? There won't be such thing."

Then you opened the door and got shocked. With a dense your heart broke in two. The pain invaded you in a millisecond. Your whole body was suffering from pain . Your throat was filled with a thousand knives. You did not have the courage to speak out , for fear of breaking yourself completely , for fear that every word said by you it would had be found to be nothing more than a sign of hypocrisy.

Your brother was out of bed. He was on the floor and he was fighting, he was struggling desperately. He was trying to move groveling. In the room it could be heard only his deep and fast breath.

You advanced slowly toward him and you putted in your knees next to him. You stretched your hand and touched his shoulder but like a beast he quickly took it off of him and pushed you.

" Jinmin!" Sehun with a movement he jumped to you.  But he stopped when he saw you still looking at Maru with guilt and sadness in your eyes. Once again you went next to him and touched him and once again there was the same result.  Again, again and again before you suddenly hugged him and didn't let go even if he was struggling.

"LET ME GO!" he shouted. Your eyes got wet. Tears were streaming down from both of you.

"I CAN'T STAY LIKE THIS!!!! I WANT TO WALK AGAIN!!!!!! "

His strength were slowly abandoning him. You began to move back and forth still hugging him. You tried to calm him cuddling him. 

After a long time he was completely calm and you finally talked.

" hey,  big boy. " you couldn't help but talking your tears improved " you're 17 now and you still want to be cradled?"

 Maru chuckled. 

You turned serious " I'm sorry Maru. I'm really sorry. I know that this is something that can't be resolved with an apology . I know I can't be forgiven. I too don't forgive me. I should be punished for this." were breathing hard and you began to tremble.      Asthma

"I hate myself. What I have done. I hate it. I should be punished! Not you! " your head was starting to spin around.

" Yes it's true. You have been reckless, selfish and arrogant. But Jinmin it was not your fault. Try to forgive yourself. I'm not angry with you. And even if Dad is trying to somehow punish you. Jinmin you're punishing you too much. He will never punish you more than you are doing it yourself. "

You sighed " I deserve even more.." your brother snorted

"oh shut up!" your eyes widened " and tell me how is this guy!" he said pointing to Sehun with disdain.

You turned to Sehun that was quietly staying behind you. You smiled to him.

The person I fall in love with.

The person to whom I'm attracted.

The person that put me in danger.

The person i can't have.

The one that doesn't want to let me go….. A selfish person…

"My friend."