Denial

The Secrets of the Mind

“This, this, and this,” Kyungjin cried, throwing items into the cart.

Kris frowned from beside her, peering at the junk food she threw into the shopping cart. He pulled them out and set it back on the shelf. “You know you have to eat a well-balanced diet. You can’t afford to be eating things like,” he paused as he looked at the package in his hand, “Lays.”

“That’s suggested for everybody! And do they listen to the thought of eating a well-balanced diet? No! And I haven’t eaten chips for the longest time. Why can’t I just be a normal person for today?” she grumbled.

Kris shot her a glare that instantly quieted her down, making her look away.

Kris then noticed Minseok staring somewhat curiously at them. “What?” he asked.

Minseok observed them a little longer and then said, “Could you teach me how to make her go quiet like that? It seems to be pretty useful.”

Kyungjin scoffed at his comment, showing her immense displeasure at the two’s behaviors.

Kris patted her on the shoulder. “Hey, cheer up. I’ll cook you something you like.”

She looked up sullenly at him. “Really?”

He nodded.

She grinned, brightening up immediately. “The exact words I want to hear.” She paused. “For free?” she asked hopefully.

Kris scoffed, “Hey, I have a business to run.”

She chuckled, “Oh, I knew you would say that. I tried though.”

Kris shook his head in amusement.

Minseok watched them with a vacant expression. “Are we done here?”

Kris turned his head to look at him and then at the list he was holding. “Done here, yeah. But I have to go to the farmer’s market to get some vegetables.”

“Well, what are we waiting for?” Kyungjin cried. “The faster we buy the food, the faster I get to eat.” She glanced at Minseok stoic face. “The faster we get to eat,” she suggested, trying to appease the other.

Minsoek blinked at her. “Don’t try that on me. You’re the only one here who’s excited to eat.”

She frowned then shrugged in a carefree motion while grinning. “Guilty,” she sang before spinning around and pushing the cart toward the check-out line.

Kris started to argue with her, telling her that he could push it and that she shouldn’t overexert herself. However, she playfully hissed at him like a cat and responded that she wasn’t that weak that she could push a cart.

Minseok watched them walk away before slowly trailing them behind.

 

“I’m going over there to check out their produce. It may take a while,” Kris murmured with a determined glint in his eyes. “This guy is stubborn to the core, so haggling may take a longer that a few minutes.” He glanced at the two. “Go around and look at the stalls. I’ll come and find you once I’m done.”

He vigorously left them while they stood there for a few seconds before Kyungjin sprang into action. She grabbed Minseok by the arm and pointed at a bright colored stall that was selling small trinkets. “Let’s go there!” she shouted cheerfully.

Minseok didn’t say anything and was slightly startled by Kyungjin’s touch, having being rarely touched by other people besides his parents who also rarely had physical contact with him. But he let himself be pulled by the girl because it was too much of an effort to make her stop.

 

“Isn’t it adorable?” she asked, showing him a small glass figurine that sat on the palm of her hand.

Minseok barely glanced at it before turning away and nodding.

She sighed and set it down. “Will it kill you to show some enthusiasm? I swear, you make me want to punch you at times. Maybe that will emit some reaction from you.”

He glanced at her momentarily and resumed watching the local people pass them by. “I don’t believe I have to. Too much effort is put in trying to appease the other person. Why should I put on a front that doesn’t display how I really feel? You are simply lying to the other person.”

“You have this odd dislike of people putting up a false front. But you know, people do it for a reason. Whether it’s good or bad. But they do it for a reason. Can you blame them?” she responded in a soft tone.

Minseok stared at her with steeled eyes. “But in the end, all it does is cause pain. I rather show the truth before the other person becomes too attached to their own thinking of what actually isn’t real.”

“So, shatter their ideals from the beginning rather than later?” Kyungjin mused.

Minseok nodded sullenly.

There was a moment of silence between them despite the bustle of the marketplace around them. Minseok was slightly worried that his harsh words had affected Kyungjin negatively, but that thought flew out the second he thought it.

“Wow,” she murmured.

Minseok turned slightly to look at her from the corner of his eye, judging her reaction.

“You sure have a negative way of thinking,” she grinned at him. “Of course, I don’t think like that, but I suppose I understand where you’re coming from. No such thing as rose-colored glasses for you.”

She paused. “But you have to understand, people’s emotions are much more complex than you think. You can’t just base them on what they’re thinking at the moment. People have a past. You can’t just ignore that fact. And people can change.”

Minseok was quiet, but responded after some time, “I suppose. But can people really change? Is it really that easy?”

She let his words sink in and was about the respond, but Kris arrived not a moment later.

He was carrying two heavy bags and gestured with side nod with his head. “Let’s get going?”

Kyungjin rushed towards him, placing her hands over one of the bags. “Let me carry one for you.”

Kris shook his head stubbornly. “No way.” He glanced at Minseok who hadn’t moved from his spot. “But if your friend…” he trailed off.

Minseok didn’t have to listen to his thoughts to know what Kris wanted. And without a single word, he walked to them, grabbed a bag, and headed off away from them.

They stared at him before Kris spoke up. “Erm, it’s the other way.”

Minseok stopped walking, spun around, and headed the opposite direction. Judging from his expression, he looked unfazed. But Kris and Kyungjin glanced at each other, both trying to stifle laughs.

 

They arrived at the restaurant a few minutes later. It was small with a dark green awning creating a small area where shade covered a few tables in front of the restaurant. The windows were shaded dark where one couldn’t simply glance inside the restaurant unless they pressed their face against the glass.

Kris unlocked the door and ushered them inside. He took the bag off Minseok’s hand and pointed with his hand the scattered tables inside. “Just pick a seat anywhere. I don’t officially open until later, but I suppose I can make an exception for you two.”

He then walked briskly toward a door and pushed it open, leaving the door swinging behind him.

Kyungjin shouted after him, “I would like if you could cook us the most expensive dish you have here.”

That made Kris pop his head out the kitchen to give her a of his eyebrow. “You sure you can afford that? Not that it is, but you know what I mean. And why? Wouldn’t you rather have something you like to eat?”

She shook her head, offering no explanation why. “Just do it. Please.”

Kris scrutinized at her, as if that would offer an explanation, but he simply shook his head and headed back into the kitchen.

Minseok observed the interior. It had a modern but also had an elegant look to it. The walls were black with geometric patterned across them. The tables and booths were lined with red upholstery with black tables.

Kyungjing glanced around, trying to find the best place to sit. She pointed to the brightest area in the restaurant, a small booth next to the window near the front of the restaurant. “That looks like a good spot.”

Minseok, who had no actual preference on where they sat, headed over to the booth with her silently.

As they sat down, it was evident that Kyungjin wanted to say something due to her shifted glances at the boy across from her. However, Minseok was not about to let her indulge in the fact that he would be the first one to speak and waited patiently before she broke down and spoke first. And of course, it resulted in a long lingering silence.

And she almost did, except for the fact that Kris came out of the kitchen with a tray with three bowls in one of his hands.

He set one down in front of both of them and finally setting one next to Kyungjin before promptly sitting down next to her.

In response to the girl’s curious look she gave him, he only offered, “I’m hungry too.”

But Minseok wasn’t bothered with Kris joining them; instead he was focused on the dish in front of him.

“Ramen,” he supplied shortly. He looked up at Kris. “Ramen is the most expensive dish you have here?”

Kris picked up his chopsticks and pointed one of the silver utensils at him. “Hey, don’t underestimate this dish. It’s famous in this area. People come all over just to eat it.” He dropped the bottom of his chopsticks against the table with resulted in a clacking noise and a straightened pair of chopsticks.

“The reason why it’s the most expensive dish here is because I use imperial noodles and my own secret base and sauce. And besides, just because it’s the most expensive dish here does not mean it is actually that expensive. Maybe it’s expensive for something like ramen, but at least it isn’t crazy expensive that you can’t afford it.”

Minseok peered at the ramen which was actually prepared rather nicely, with the ramen swirled towards the middle, large pieces of meat lying on top, slices of pink fish cake next to it, some green and white vegetables lying on top as well, and topped with an egg in the middle.

Kyungjin had already started eating the ramen the moment Kris set the bowl in front of her.

Minseok sniffed it once, appreciating the nice aroma coming off it, and began to eat it as well.

Kris watched nervously despite having positive reviews from previous customers. He didn’t know why, but he wanted both of them to like it. Perhaps it was because Kyungjin was one of his close friends and he wanted her to like it, and he felt that if he could win Minseok over, he could win anybody over.

Kyungjin noticed his staring, stopped eating with the noodles still dangling from her lips and gave him the best smile she could with food still in . She added a thumbs up for good measure.

Kris then looked at Minseok who had started eating the ramen and was now chewing slowly almost as if he was contemplating the taste with the utmost seriousness.

Minseok shifted his attention to the man who was watching with eagerness. He stared back, not changing his expression the slightest.

Kris shifted in his seat tensely, not knowing what to say, and finally blurting a small “Hi” in his nervousness.

Kris looked shocked at his choice of words while Kyungjin snorted, spitting out a bit a noodle and some soup back into her bowl.

Minseok stared stonily at Kyungjin’s action, as if he secretly disproved of it. But then he turned his attention to Kris and blinked once at him. “It tastes good.”

Kris unknowingly let out a sigh of relief while Kyungjin wiped with the back of her hand and openly laughed a little. But then it was right back to the food, eating with such a vigor neither Minseok or Kris had seen.

She finished her bowl in no time at all, while Minseok was still calmly eating his bowl of food.

Feeling antsy doing nothing but sitting and with Minseok seemingly in no hurry to finish his food, she struck up a conversation much belated with Kris.

“Your food is always the best,” she complimented with a bright smile.

He returned her smile with a grateful one. “Thanks. It means a lot coming from you.” He smile turned to more solemn one. “Though it was harder to see you not being able to eat at all before.”

She gave him a wry smile. “I’m better. And now I can eat all the delicious food you make all I want! Not a bad deal,” she laughed.

Then they went on past happenings, about how people they both knew were doing like her cousin, Jongdae, and her best friend who apparently moved away.

Minseok didn’t know, and he told himself that he didn’t care. He stopped paying attention; he even tried his best to ignore their thoughts.

He didn’t want to listen in; he felt like he was prying. And her past, well, Minseok had the feeling that he wanted her to tell him personally instead of finding it out through his ability of his.

He shook his head, trying to erase that thought. Why would he want to find out in the first place? There was a reason why he didn’t bother with other people. And he had stuck with that doctrine ever since. Because everything was too much of a hassle.

What happened with Kyungjin was hers to mind. He had no business to intertwine his life with hers besides the arrangement they had made.

He looked down to see that he had finished his bowl of noodles and set his chopsticks lightly on top of the bowl.

With that noise, both of two other people stopped talking, signifying that it was time to leave.

All three of them stood up and walked towards the front where the cash register was.

Kris stopped and looked at both of them. “You don’t have to pay. My treat.”

Kyungjin shook her head furiously. “No, no way. There was a reason why I wanted to eat the most expensive dish at specifically at your restaurant.”

“And I don’t want someone I don’t know that well to pay for my food,” Minseok added. “That is simply rude.”

Kris looked saddened at his words. “We’re not friends?” he pouted.

Minseok blinked at him. “Only if you want to be. But I don’t really have friends.”

“Aren’t we friends?” Kyungjin piped up from the side.

He barely gave her a glance and responded quickly with at straight, “No.”

Kyungjin tsked at his words while Kris looked amused.

They both handed Kris a sum of money to pay for their food, while Kris thanked them for visiting. “Please, come again.”

Kyungjin smiled widely. “Of course, when I’m healthy again, I’ll visit every week, no, every day!”

Kris laughed. “You’ll be my best customer.”

Minseok nodded slowly. “Yes, your food is quite good. Perhaps I’ll come by as well.”

Kris couldn’t help but let a smile light up his face. “Great. Fantastic. I’ll be seeing you both then.”

Kyungjin nodded and glanced at the clock that was hanging on the wall. “I should get going. Dr. Soo doesn’t want me staying out too long.”

Minseok looked at her. “Finally going back?”

She rolled her eyes. “Yes, finally going back. Is it really that bad spending time with me? Can’t you at least pretend to like it just a little? I’m not saying that you have to go all out and obviously pretend with fake happiness. Just a little appreciation would be nice, so that I don’t have to feel like you dislike me or something.”

Minseok didn’t respond, only tilting his head down slightly at Kris. “Thanks for the food.” And immediately left the restaurant, leaving Kyungjin behind.

“Seriously?” she muttered. “That boy. I think he just might be an alien. Or maybe a robot.” She paused in her thought. “That would be kinda cool.” She spun around and gave Kris a hug. “Thanks for everything. And…from before.”

He smiled, releasing her from the hug. “Anytime.” He looked out the window, where regardless of Minseok’s lack of words, he was waiting patiently outside for Kyungjin. “Are you sure you two aren’t going out?”

Kyungjin made a face that looked slightly like a leer. “Hey, just because we match so well doesn’t mean we are going out.” She looked out the window as well. “He’s a weird kid, but he’s not that bad, just rough around the edges,” she mumbled softly.

She laughed. “I’ll see you again. Thanks for the food!” she shouted as she rushed out the door.

Kris watched them walk away; Minseok looking expressionless as ever and Kyungjin with the most animated look on hers.

In spite of having the most polar personalities, Kris thought that perhaps they did match rather well.

 


A/N:  Is Minseok finally showing some interest? Maybe, but he keeps denying it.  

 

Sorry for the long wait. Like always, the excuse is school. Of course, it’s school. Bleh.

But thanks for patiently waiting. Hopefully I can come out with a new update soon, but no false hopes here. School, school, and more school has overtaken this life of mine. And a little story writing on the side makes it all better. Sort of. If I have time. *cries*

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Comments

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XiuminsKnuts
#1
Chapter 20: Mmm could Chanyeol also hear thoughts or was hin saying monster a reference to him manipulating. The whole layer to his thoughts makes me think he was well aware of true thoughts and hiding them
Baembi
#2
Chapter 30: How could I not have read this before T_T This is literally one of the best Xiumin fics! Aww I wish the surgery will be successful..
MiniMe004
#3
Chapter 30: ....... and she'll die ...... No, I hope everything will end up fine
anitaklr24
#4
Chapter 30: I love it! hope everything is fine!
Have a nice night/ day!
Hugs ^^,
anitaklr24
#5
Chapter 29: I really like it! they are so cute together. Hope the best to Kyungjin!
Have a nice night / day!
Hugs ^^,
ReadTheGems #6
Chapter 29: Your story is so thoughtful and relevant to me. It make me curious as to what life has thrown at you and how you have dealt with it. I am glad to know that there is a person such as yourself out there. Thank you.
Now off to look at any other stories written by you.
k_nana #7
Chapter 29: You know, i didn't even know about the story until i scrolled over xiumin's list of fics and stumbled upon this one n i was damn glad i did. This story means a lot to me because in a way, his character is related to mine a bit in dealing strangers so throughout a series of ur updates, i learnt a lot from ur character of xiumin and for that, thank u, even though ur not expecting this. I will be sad when i finish reading ur fic, but then again, i can just reread it again and again if i want too. Thanks for writing this wonderful fic :)
anitaklr24
#8
Chapter 28: Beautiful chapter! I have a great time reading it! Hugs ^^,
anitaklr24
#9
Chapter 27: Great chapter! Finally they are together!!!I am so happy with this chapter!
Hugs ^^,
anitaklr24
#10
Chapter 26: I don't know why but I cried a little in this chapter. Sometimes, we are like Minseok who put a lot of expectations in Chanyeol without thinking that Chanyeol was a human like him, who makes mistakes.
I am looking forward to the next chapter!
Hugs ^^,