CHAPTER 6 - - 

- - regret

"Welcome to your... new home Krystal."

I'd always wondered why she'd never called me Soojung, my Korean name.

But, I pushed that thought out of my mind as I followed my mother out of the car. My new home wasn't very big, it was at least half the size of my old home, but then again, there weren't many houses as big as my old one. The new one seemed cosy though, with its white painted walls, wooden doors and large windows. The garden was alive and flourishing and I could spy a children's play gym in it.

It was a perfect family home.

I felt my heart clench at the thought.

I was infringing on this family, wasn't I?

"Krystal? Are you coming?"

I shook my head, eyes focusing on my mother as she held out her hand for me. Slowly, I reached out and grasped her hand, her warmth soothing me. A tired smile curved her lips and I wondered if my father's death affected her too.

She led me to the white-walled house and I felt anticipation building. Behind that front door was a new life, one that I knew nothing about.

Well, there wasn't much I knew to begin with. I was only ten.

My mother opened the door and there they were, my stepfather and my stepsister.

My step-father was a tall man, lanky and nothing like my father. My father had been a bigger man, one that seemed more secure than this one. But maybe, that's why my mom chose this one - because he was nothing like my father. I then shifted my attention to the little girl standing beside him.

She was pretty.

She stood shyly, half behind her father's leg as she watched me, trying to figure me out.

I bowed.

"Hello," I said mid-bow, "My name Jung Soojung, but everyone calls me Krystal. It's very nice to meet you and thank you for taking me in."

My stepfather smiled at this, "Welcome to our family Krystal." My mother had obviously told him to call me that.

"Jinri, say hello."

The young girl bowed, "My name is Choi Jinri. I hope we can be friends," she said softly and I nodded.

I was then invited further into the house, but before I entered, I couldn't help but look back.

The sun was slowly setting and then night would fall... but the sun will rise again.

Right?

- - - - -

Minho and I had fallen into a routine.

I'd wake up, make coffee, wake him up, make him breakfast, get ready for varsity, leave for class, come home and make dinner. Often, well actually every day, Key came over in the evenings and he and Minho kept each other company while I worked on the homework I'd been given. I didn't want to fall behind and I appreciated Key distracting me from Minho for a few hours.

Sometimes Key slept over, but otherwise he'd leave and it'd just Minho and I again. Minho had now gotten into the habit of hugging me before bed and it was something I looked forward to now, to the point where I would hype myself up for it. I was sad really, wanting such contact with him. And since it was Wednesday, Sulli was coming home in two days and I really wasn't sure how I was going to explain this to her.

She wasn't like me and I don't think she was going to appreciate Minho living here, but we'd deal with that when we'd have to.

Tonight was different to the usual routine.

For once, I had very little homework and Key wasn't able to come over due to work commitments. I managed to finish my work early, so now, it was simply Minho and I in the living room. I was on the floor, pretending to read a book while Minho was reading a magazine Key had left here.

"Whoa," I heard him exclaim and I looked up from my book to see what'd captured his attention so, "I didn't know that this is what Girls Generation looked like now." He seemed awed and immediately, I felt jealously tugging at my heart. It was a well known fact that Girls Generation was comprised of very beautiful women, ones that us normal women couldn't compete with.

I had no chance compared to them.

"Yeah," I stammered out, trying to avoid the look of amazement shining in his eyes, "Don't you see pictures of them in the countryside?" I tried to joke.

He shook his head, "I hardly ever watch TV and my parents keep the radio on a station suited for older people, so I don't hear too much. There's so many of them..." he trailed and I tore my gaze away.

I wanted him back in the country life, where he didn't really know of Girls Generation's existence.

But then I realized that he wouldn't be here right now.

I sighed as I closed my book. I was unable to read anyway and I might as well call this an early night-

"Krystal, what's this one's name?"

I froze as Minho showed me the magazine, his finger stuck on one of the members.

"Yoona..." I breathed out, feeling deflated.

"She's the prettiest of them all," he replied, seemingly oblivious to my feeling of rejection. Did he have to go and pick the prettiest one? Honestly, did he? Few women could ever compare to her. She was simply that blessed.

But as I'd told myself once before, you could never hate, or be jealous of someone for something they'd been born with - they didn't have a choice after all.

"But..." he spoke, breaking me from my thoughts, "I know someone prettier."

My eyes widened at this and I turned to him, questioning him without words. That same smirk appeared on his lips.

"Would you like to know who it is?" he asked me slowly and I nodded before I could stop myself.

"You."

He said it so effortlessly that I believed him.

The blush stained my cheeks and my heart began to pound,

"Minho..." I began, "You don't mean that... I'm not going to kick you out just because you think someone is prettier than me. I mean, wait until you see Sulli-

I was interrupted as suddenly a hand was in front of my face and it was connected to Minho.

I gaped at his hand, how had he gotten up from the couch so quickly? He wiggled his hand and I hesitantly reached out to grasp it. Within moments he pulled me up and I stumbled as soon as my knees straightened. Luckily, he stabilized me by grabbing my shoulders. This however made us rather close.

Close enough that I could feel his breath on my nose.

He watched me with an amused expression - he knew exactly what he was doing to me.

"Key told me something interesting the other day," he said in a hushed tone.

"Oh yeah?" I dumbly responded, trying not to focus on the way his lips moved.

"Something about you."

"... oh... yeah?" I said again, unable to say anything else really.

 "He said," he paused, "That you love to dance."

My eyes widened slightly as I blinked at the male before me. Why would Key go and say something like that? It was something I shared with others very often, simply because it was something I never really had a chance to do. With my schedule and lack of finance, there was no time for dancing.

Making time for it would mean I would have to sacrifice study time and that would ultimately disappoint my mother and stepfather. I couldn't do that.

"I..." I tried to protest, "I'm not good."

He chuckled, "He didn't say that you were good. He just told me that you like to dance," he said playfully.

A moment of silence transpired and I became all too aware of his touch on my shoulders. His warmth was penetrating the fabric of my large sweatshirt, so much so that my skin under his fingertips was tingling.

"Dance for me?"

His question was unexpected in the silence and I opened my mouth to protest, but no words came.

I think he'd realized that I couldn't say no.

So, I nodded.

His smile brightened my world and he let go of my shoulders. Disappointment flooded through me, but I remained motionless as he shuffled closer to the kitchen counter. Once there he the radio that was kept there. Music immediately blared through the speakers and I recognized the song.

Oh the irony.

Girl's Generation's Genie was playing, and the song had just started.

Almost every girl knew the dance to this song. Heck, almost every male knew it too and judging by the look on Minho's face, he knew this. Didn't he come from the country? Where he didn't watch TV?

He leaned against the counter and his eyes met mine. Without words he was telling me that he wanted me to dance to this song.

I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply.

My resolve hadn't even built itself yet.

Instead, I concentrated on the song, trying to remember the right steps to the dance and before I knew it, my body was moving by itself. It was an easy dance and I could remember the many nights Sulli and I had spent practicing it and dancing to it whenever it came on the TV.

Slowly, I felt the familiar comfort and confidence I felt while dancing begin to bubble through my veins, filling me. It'd been such a long time since I'd last done this and my soul was truly appreciating this - being whisked away by a song and allowing my body to simply move without my mind calculating its every move.

I even opened my eyes.

I didn't see Minho though, well I did, but instead of calling him Minho, I saw the male I wanted to sing the lyrics of this song to. Not even just sing, but to give.

The furniture, walls and even the floor all faded. All that was left was Minho and I and the words I couldn't say.

The song continued and his eyes remained glued to me, following every moment. But I didn't feel shy under his gaze, no, not at all. I felt encouraged and I even added in dance moves that weren't part of the routine.

I wanted to stay in this world.

But, unfortunately, we never get what we want.

"Tell me your wish," I whispered as the song ended and my world of two began to disintegrate. Walls, furniture and floor returned to my vision and I noticed the light sweat on my forehead and the only just faster pumping of my heart.

Minho's eyes were still on me though, but my previous confidence faded and I averted my gaze.

Had I really just done that?

I was given no time to ponder further as I was crushed into Minho's chest.

The air was almost knocked out of me at the force he displayed. I hadn't been expecting this. No, no. But I wasn't about to fight it... I'd never felt this secure, this warm before and I wasn't about to shy from it.

Minho made me want to be selfish.

For once, the word didn't cause me to flinch.

His arms tightened around my middle and I timidly wrapped mine around his torso. This was nothing like our nightly hugs. I was painfully aware right now of every move his body made. I could hear his heart beating irregularly. I could feel the outline of his back muscles beneath my fingers and I could feel the push and pull of his chest against me as he breathed. I could hear his inhales and exhales of air above me and I could feel the heat of his exhales against my scalp. Everything felt hyperaware of him. It felt like my world consisted of only him.

"Krystal..." I'd never heard my name spoken so tenderly before, "What's your wish?"

I lifted my head to gaze up at him at the question.

For the first time, his eyes were vulnerable.

I wanted to reassure him.

Bravely, I reached out and cupped his cheek gently. The action surprised him and I bit my lip.

Unfortunately, my bravery wasn't enough for me to voice my wish, but it was enough for me to lean upwards on my tippy-toes and place my lips on his.

His shock was instantly evident from the way his frame tensed, but I wouldn't run away from this. And the wait paid off as he relaxed and returned the tender action.

But it wasn't until he curved his lips into a smile against mine that I felt right.

. . .

'I'm looking for someone...'

I froze as those words flashed through my mind.

Minho... to want him to stay with me would be cruel. He was looking for someone and to keep him here with me would be cruel to that person.

It would be selfish.

I flinched, breaking the kiss and backed myself out of his grip. The action surprised me and Minho looked at me with confusion and hurt evident.

I couldn't return his gaze.

"I... I..." I stammered, unable to speak.

"I'm so sorry!" I apologized and without sparing him another glance I escaped to my room, shutting the door behind me before sliding down the surface.

I hit the ground with a soft thud, but I didn't care. No pain could match the one I felt in my heart.

Jung Krystal, what have you done? 

- - - - -

Oh ho! The plot thickens and Krystal actually kissed him *-* I hadn't even expected to write it, it just came. Silly story, writing yourself =3 I want to say thank you so much to everyone who's upvoted, subscribed and commented on this story. You guys make me smile, know that? I'm happy to able to make you all happy with this gift of mine <3

I'll try update soon!