CHAPTER FOURTEEN - -

- - change

There was only one week left of the semester.

It'd become a mantra for me.

Just one more week of work.

Just one.

After this one week, I'd be free and I'd be able to see Minho a lot more. I'd coerced Onew into giving me a job at the restaurant for the break and he'd reluctantly agreed, on the condition that Minho and I don't go sneaking off anywhere. Other than that, we'd be able to see each other a lot more in the evenings because I wouldn't have exams to worry about.

It was enough to bring a smile to my face as I suffered through the rest of my final accounting exam for the year. It was a rather important one as the results of this one would be sent to some of the large firms in Korea. From them, the firms would select those they wanted as potential employees and I was determined to make that list.

I felt relieved as I walked out of the exam hall, but I was happy too.

It'd gone well.

By now, my feet knew the path from the university to Onew's chicken restaurant and I barely had to pay attention to my surroundings. It wasn't too far, a ten to fifteen minute walk was all it took. I called it my 'exercise of the day' and used that time to think.

Ever since the double date, Jessica and I had been talking more regularly and when I called her, I sometimes got to talk to Donghae too. It was fun teasing them whenever they were together because I'd always ask why they hadn't invited me to the wedding. Donghae would play along, but Jessica would get flustered and make an excuse of some sort.

They were an adorable couple and I was happy they'd found each other.

But I was also happy that they approved of Minho.

Jessica was even asking when we'd go on another double date.

Other than that, life had been pretty normal again. Well, this new normal. Sulli and I still kept silent around each other and I noticed that she'd be gone more often than usual. But, I just assumed that she was doing more modelling jobs. I'd sort of gotten used to this new silence between us, but I felt sad at times.

I shook my head as I walked.

It was for a good cause.

Given the chance, Sulli would try to take Minho too.

And that was enough to keep me from wavering.

Besides... one day when I felt completely secure, I'd let her and Minho interact more. When I was definitely sure that Sulli wouldn't go after him and that he wouldn't have any interest in her.

Don't get me wrong, I believed Minho when he said that he wouldn't go for her. But, men are ruled by desires and well, I knew that Sulli could be an object of desire if she so chose to. I didn't want him to be tempted.

I could've laughed at myself really.

Did I really have the right to stop him from talking to Sulli? From seeing her? Wasn't that just me being controlling?

And Selfish?

For the first time in a long time, my felt guilt prick at my heart.

I frowned as I slowly raised a hand and placed it over my heart.

Was it really selfishness? To keep the one you liked away from something that could potentially take them away? Was it wrong to want to protect them?

...

I didn't know the answers.

- - - - -

"Krystal! You're here!" Minho's excited cheer was enough to lift my heart as he approached me - quickly. I couldn't help but smile when I saw him. He simply had that aura around him.

Luckily, he didn't seem to be helping a table so I didn't feel like I was taking him away from his work as we embraced. I exhaled into his chest as his hand cupped the nape of my neck. I liked hugs like this the most - they made me feel as though he really had missed me. I hope that I conveyed the same when I hugged him.

"How did the exam go?" he asked sweetly as we parted.

"Good," I grinned and held a thumbs-up.

"I'm happy and you came at a good time," he said brightly as he gently took my hand and led me to-

The storage room?

He didn't close the door however, which I was glad for. It would be awfully dark in here if he did and I wasn't a fan of that.

I was now curious though, because Minho was nervous again, just like when he'd met my sister for the second time.

But, why on earth-

My thoughts were interrupted as he took both of my hands in his, gripping them tightly. I frowned slightly.

What on earth-

"I need to ask you something," he asked with seriousness in his eyes, "And it's something important."

I blinked slowly. What could be so important that he had to pull me aside and away from prying eyes.

"Ok?" I exhaled, "Is everything ok?"

He chuckled awkwardly, "Everything is perfectly ok. Grand in fact."

"Then why are you acting so strange?" I asked directly, trying to search his eyes for an answer.

"Acting strangely? Ah, Onew gave me coffee not too long ago so it must be affecting me," he replied and I tilted my head to the side in confusion.

"I see..." I mumbled, not really convinced, "But what is it that you had to ask me?"

He tensed again, "Well... It's all because of Donghae and I'm sorry that I just assumed things without actually asking and I... I..." he paused, gulping. Now, I was really curious as to what he wanted to ask, especially since it seemed that Donghae had some part to play in this.

"I wanted to know if... if-

I inwardly growled as my phone began ringing, cutting him off.

I pulled my phone from my pocket and furrowed my brow in irritation. The frown did lessen when I saw that the call was from my sister.

Minho saw this too, "Go ahead. Answer, I can wait."

I nodded. Jessica didn't usually call in the middle of the day when she should be working.

"Hello?"

"Hey Krystal... is this a bad time?" I was concerned at the melancholic sound of her voice, laced with sorrow. Had something happened.

"No, this isn't a bad time. Is everything ok?"

"Yeah, everything is fine with me. That's not why I'm calling."

Then, for what reason?

"I feel bad since I've forgotten up until now... but you know what tomorrow is right?"

I shook my head before realizing that she couldn't see the motion, "Tomorrow? As in Thursday?"

"Besides that. Tomorrow is..." Jessica paused and I felt dread scratching my heart, "It's his anniversary Krystal."

His anniversary?

My eyes widened as the realization settled in.

"Tomorrow is the anniversary of dad's death and I was hoping we could go to the cemetery together."

How on earth could I have forgotten?

Just how?

Was I that uncaring of a daughter?

I felt the tears welling and I tried my best to stop them, "Yeah..." I shakily spoke into the phone, "We can go together tomorrow."

"I'll text you the details later then. I'll see you ok?"

And before I could say anything else, she'd hung up.

I slowly placed my phone back in my pocket, feeling numb, before I looked back to Minho. Concern was written all over his face, from the forehead wrinkle to his pursed lips.

"What did she say?" he asked gently, as though a loud noise would break me.

I could barely hold the tears now.

"She asked me to meet her at the cemetery tomorrow," I began, my legs shaking, "It's his anniversary tomorrow after all."

"Whose?" he asked softly.

I smiled bitterly, "My dad."

And then I could no longer hold the tears. They rolled down my cheeks like rivers. The shaking in my legs increased tenfold and I couldn't hold myself up anymore. My knees buckled and I waited for an impact that never came.

Minho quickly reached out and pulled me into him, supporting me with his strength. I allowed my tears to become unstrained as I cried onto his shirt.

I was a horrible daughter.

A selfish, horrible daughter.

Minho said nothing as he held me, trying to soothe me as he my back.

But there was nothing to say and nothing could soothe me.

- - - - -

Minho walked me home soon after that. He said that he didn't trust me getting home in my condition and I didn't even have the strength to fight him really. I kept on feeling guilty. I remembered every year in advance. I usually already had the bouquet by now. I'd even planned my outfit.

But... this year...

I shook my head as we found my front door. I should try not to think about it. It was a mistake right? I mean, I had exams and stuff so I was just stressed... that's why I'd forgotten.

Selfish.

The word caused me to whimper and Minho squeezed my hand worriedly.

"Are you going to be ok?" he asked softly, trying to meet my unwilling gaze.

I forced a smile, "I'm going to be ok."

I know he didn't believe me, but I also knew that he wasn't going to push me and for that I was grateful.

"Promise you'll call someone if you aren't?" I knew he meant one of SHINee and I nodded.

There was a moment of silence between us as Minho debated whether or not he should really leave, but soon the look on his face proved that the 'you should leave' side had won.

"I'll see you tomorrow?" he queried as he leaned down to quickly capture my lips.

For a brief moment, my heart lifted.

This was the first time he'd kissed my lips since that day at the Gardens and while the situation wasn't ideal, I was grateful. He pulled away quickly, but I sent him a reassuring glance and his eyes softened. I was really, really grateful for him right now and while I wanted him to stay, I needed to sort out some things in my head.

And then, he was gone.

My heart felt his loss immediately but I ignored it as I opened the door.

I'd been home for about an hour when I heard the door open.

My thoughts hadn't been too progressive - more just a muddle of words such as:

Forget.

How?

Selfish.

It was sad how I hadn't managed to move past those and I was beginning to think that it'd been a bad idea to send Minho back. But I was too dependent on him. I needed to be able to do something for myself right?

I heard Sulli taking off her shoes from my bedroom and I figured that she'd retreat to her room after this - like usual.

But I was proved wrong when I heard a knock at my door.

Luckily, by the now the tears had dried and my face wasn't as puffy so she hopefully wouldn't be able to see my previous tears.

"Come in," I called out, pleased that my voice remained firm.

I turned to face the door as soon as it opened and I was instantly concerned.

Sulli was crying. Thick, black lines running down her cheeks as evidence.

"Are you ok?" I asked warily and she shook her head.

"We need to talk," she said shakily and walked closer, "We really need to talk."

Dread pooled in my stomach.

Tada! Sorry it's a bit short but next chapter is a bit of a doozy so you'll have to be patient and see ^^ 

And wow, I almost have 300 comments for this O.O I saw that and I was amazed at all the wonderful people that love and read my story <3 It's really the thing that gives me the energy to write this even when I have writer's block ^^ So thank you all once again <3