It was a cold, dark night. The wind was rough, dry, and rather cold. The coldness of it struck her flesh to her bones, engulfing her petite figure. It was raining outside, followed by a series of rumbling thunder. It haunted her, the loud rumbling noise. She has always hated thunder and today was worse. She was scared, she was trembling. Everything was dark, she couldn’t see a single light that would light up her path.

She trembled, under the cold touch of the wind, how it greeted her fragile body. She curled her fragile self into a ball, protecting herself in the corner of the room. Her clothes were ripped into two, leaving her with no choice but to cover herself with a thin layer of dark green blanket. But still, it exposed half of her milky white skin. She was trembling, the sense of fear clearly being reflected from her hazel orbs.

Her milky porcelain skin was dirtied with the sign of abuse. It has left it own marks along her body, the bruise and the blood. Her ripped clothes have told them all, her own story of being abused and harassed. She curled herself up, trying to protect herself only to meet the failure that awaits her again and again. She was scared, it was a fearful night. Her pink lips have turned plump, her warmth has turned cold, and her hair was messy. She bit her nails, until her fingers bleed, chewing her lips until it cracked. She was broken, exactly like a broken doll.

She no longer possessed the glimpse of light in her eyes; it was dark, scared, and hopeless. She has lost her right state of mind long ago, she has turned crazy. She hated this and every night, where she has to bear with all the pain. She hated the way his scent intoxicated her, she hated the way his scent stick all over her body. She reeks of alcohol and the room too.

The room was spacious; it made her feel even more insecure. The winds kept on greeting her, as she continued to tremble under it touch. The walls were painted in dark red, giving it slight classy feelings, yet she hated it. It made her felt dark, helpless, and at times, scared. A king-sized bed was placed in the middle of it, and a sofa at the other ends. There, lies a man with his messy clothes, collapsing on top of the bed. His tie was loose, and he reeks the smell of alcohol so badly.

***

His head was dizzy. His body felt as if it was going to break soon. His stomach, too, wasn’t feeling good. His vision was slightly blurry, as he managed to regain consciousness. Again, he has to face the horror that awaits him. He couldn’t remember a single thing though; pitch black was all he could remember. With much hardship, he settled himself up, as he looked around the spacious room.

How much mistakes can a person do in a life time?

The question popped up in his mind, as he found the lovely fragile figure at the other corner. She looked horrible, pathetic. She bit on her nails, chewing her lips, trembling under the thin blanket. What has he done? He was heartbroken to find her, being in her pathetic state again and again. It made him wonder, how foolish he was to repeat the same mistake again and again.

His steps were heavy, as he walked toward her. He was dragging his feet, trying to regain his balance, gently approaching her. Her eyes were empty, full of fear. He squatted down in front of her, only to look at her. He was afraid, he might broke her again. She was very fragile, that a single touch might shatter her. He had shattered her countless time, therefore he was afraid.

“Jieun-ah,” he called out.

The way her beautiful name escaped his lips, the way his deep voice called out to her, scared her even more. Her body tremble at his suddenly presence, especially when she could feel his breath against her bare skin. She didn’t want to look at him, she was scared. She threw her gaze to the far end, avoiding his darker gaze.

A loud sigh escaped his lips, as he traces his fingers against her bare skin. She trembled under his cold touch, desperately wriggling to free herself. He traces her exposed skin, exposing a bit more to find the traces of abuse he has brought upon her. He has teary eyes, a sign of regret he would always show every night it happens. Yet his regret mean nothing, the day after, and even the day after tomorrow, this will always happen, the never-ending pain that she finds no end to it.

“Don’t touch me!” She screamed on top of her lungs, wildly hitting him. She has had enough, of the pain, of the suffering.

He was taken back, quickly withdrawing his touch. Never once, did she ever yell at him, despite the hatred and abuse. He ruffled his hair in desperation, as she desperately crawled to the other side of the room. Again, she curled herself, as she bit on her nails and chew on her plump lips. He tried to approach her again, tracing her skin with his cold touch, only to receive the same reaction.

“Don’t touch me!” It was demanding, which she would never receive a “no”. Despite her teary and puffy red eyes, she did not cry. “Please… let me go,” her voice slowly cracking.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I love you,” the taller man whispered sincerely. Her eyes shot up, as if he had spilled the taboos. She was scared, even more than before.

This is a never-ending pain. How many times had he apologized? How many times had he regretted this? Yet how many times had he repeated it?

She wriggled under his presence, showing her hatred and despise toward the man. Again, with her decreasing strength, she crawled to the wooden door at the far end. Afraid that he might catch her, she stood up and dragged her feet. She would stumble on her own steps, but then she would quickly crawled and proceed toward the door. Despite the pain, despite her broken heart and body, she had enough strength to open the door and slammed it close.

He ran after her, in desperation. He was afraid; she might leave him for good. If it does happen, what will he do? He has nothing left but her. But then, the horror was destined to meet him, it was the karma that awaits him. He found her, desperately packing her clothes to a small luggage she used to own. It was old and worn out, nevertheless enough to run away from him.

“Jieun, where are you going?!” He grabbed her wrist with much force, leaving a bluish bruised. But she did not answer; instead she heads for the door.

“Lee Ji Eun, where are you going?!” He was much more forceful, grabbing her wrist until she winced in pain.

“Leaving, Howon! I’m leaving!”

“What are you even talking about?!”

***

How naïve was she? She has never loved him, despite the fact that she liked him. She used to have those little tingling feelings, but it was long ago. She was another young woman, mistaking like for love. She was mistaken though; she knew nothing about love, so does he. Maybe it was her fault that she ends up in this situation.

He was there, everywhere she goes. He was her stalker, who showed her a lot of love. She thought, he simply liked her, there’s nothing more or less to it. He cared about her, he was kind and sweet. Although she has never loved him, she took a liking to him, for being such a kind man. It was something she never should have done.

He took her away, from her life. He took her away from the outside world, locking her behind the bars as if she was a bird in cage. He took her away from her family and friends. He took her away from her happiness. Of course, she was horrified at first, but then she was another naïve young girl. She thought, maybe she could find her happiness with him. Maybe, she could grow to love him, the way he has come to love her. But she was wrong and she regretted it.

She was wrong.

***

“The outside world is dangerous, Jieun!”

“You’re even more dangerous! You’re a murderer, Howon. You kill me by the soul, crueler than those who murder the body.”

“Don’t leave.”

She has had enough; the pitiful space she always emptied for him was replaced by hatred. Every time he pleaded her, she would fulfill his request. But not today, when she has had enough. She would rather die, rather than being in such a place with him. It was raining outside, the thunder will scared her for sure, but she couldn’t care less. She needs to escape. She swung the door open, greeted by the cold wind and rumbling thunder.

“You and I, this is the only way we could be happy. Jieun, stay with me. I could only be happy when I am with you. You could only be happy when I am with you. We just have to bear with it a bit more.”

“I’m sorry.” She swung the door opened.

BAM!

***

The rain has stopped, and it was a warm morning. The sun was shining brightly and the rainbow faintly painting the sky. The man was kneeling by the door, with a cold dead body on his hand. It was her, the lovely woman he has always loved. Blood was dripping down her fingers, her body has turned cold, and her heartbeat has long stopped. He was embracing her cold body, blood staining his white shirt.

“I love you.” He planted a kiss on her pale lips.

It has never been love though. It has always been an obsession.