It was lucky the photographer was so good at his job, Minseok couldn’t help but think as Jongin grabbed him.

    Minseok barely had a chance to get out an indignant: “What the hell-!” Before the was an unmistakable ‘Click!’ and teeth bit down harshly on his neck. Minseok let out a feminine shriek, because he’d just gotten marked and aliens were one thing but aliens with Vampiric tendencies was on a whole other scale.

    “What the hell is wrong with you, Jongin-ah!” Minseok exclaimed, shoving his dongsaeng away and holding a hand up to his wound.

    “Oh, calm down,” Jongin said, waving a hand in the air dismissively. “I didn’t break skin. And anyways, how else am I supposed to let these losers know that you’re mine?”

    “He’s not yours!” Luhan shouted, running to Minseok’s defense. Jongdae got there first.

    “Cheek only,” the singer growled, moving to stand in front of Minseok protectively. “How ing hard is that to understand?”

    “Don’t get all high and mighty on me, Kim Jongdae-” Jongin began, just as the photographer shoved his camera into Minseok’s free hand.

    “I’m done,” the photographer told Minseok seriously. “I thought I could deal with Idols; I was wrong. I quit.”

    “I understand, Ahjussi,” Minseok said, nodding sympathetically. “Thank you for trying.”

    The photographer grunted before stalking away. Where to, no one would ever know.

    “He’s not a goddamn toy!” Jongdae was shouting at Jongin, their faces inches apart. “Learn some respect you ridiculous mother-”

    “Stop interfering!” Jongin shouted back, looking furious. “You didn’t want anything to do with it, so why the hell do you keep-”

    “Well someone’s got to!” Jongdae exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air in frustration. “Since none of you apparently know where to draw the line-”

    “We know where the line is just fine thankyouverymuch,” Luhan cut in, moving to stand beside Jongin. “You’re the one making a big deal out of nothing-”

    “Says the man who tried to gege’s ear,” Yixing scoffed, moving to put a protective arm around Minseok.

    All of this screaming was making Minseok increasingly uncomfortable. Though Yixing made a valid point. Minseok still wasn’t over the horror that was getting molested by Luhan. Even if he was just an imposter.

    “Don’t you all think you’re getting a little too upset?” Kyungsoo asked from the sidelines, though his voice was easily drowned out by the shouting match going on.

    “Don’t ing touch him,” Baekhyun growled, grabbing Yixing by the back of the shirt and pulling him away from Minseok.

    “Don’t ing touch me,” Yixing replied, giving him a hard shove.

    “Woah, woah,” Tao exclaimed, moving to jump in between the two of them. “Let’s just take a minute, and-”

    Baekhyun swung his fist at Yixing just as Tao appeared, and somehow Tao managed to get punched in the face.

    “Oh hell no!” Wufan and Sehun shouted in unison, running into the fight just as Tao burst into tears and Yixing pounced on Baekhyun.

    “This is really getting out of hand,” Kyungsoo pointed out as he pulled Tao away from their fighting members and over to the safe bubble that was Minseok. “Are you okay Tao-ah?”

    “It hurts!” Tao wailed, clutching his jaw as tears leaked out of his eyes. “They hit me Kyungsoo-ah!”

    Minseok looked around the room in confusion. For the first time since the idea popped into his head, he wondered if maybe his alien theory was wrong. Because aliens couldn’t fake the way Tao cried over getting hit, or, consequently, how Wufan, Sehun, and Yixing immediately rose to his defense while Kyungsoo tried to calm him down. Aliens couldn’t fake Jongin’s colorful language, or that dangerous way Jongdae’s eyes flashed when he was furious. They couldn’t fake how Baekhyun’s hands immediately went to his face as soon as he started defending himself, or how Joonmyun ran around trying to calm everyone down while instead making things worse, and they couldn’t fake the way Chanyeol - being Chanyeol - just stood at the sidelines with a cup of coffee, watching the chaos calmly. Honestly though, Minseok still wasn’t too sure about Luhan.

    But if they weren’t aliens, then...

    Minseok pressed two fingers to his lips and blew as hard as he could. There was a loud, ear-piercing whistle, and everyone stopped to stare at him.

    “What the is going on?”