In the middle of the busy metropolitan was a tiny home the color of blue with cute white frames. The healthy yard of green surrounding the house would be filled with fresh flowers during the warm seasons. Beside the house was a short paved driveway where with a few steps one could reach the front door with the brass doorknob. The window overlooking the front yard allowed one to see who was driving home.

Little footsteps crossed the large living room framed with a family picture and a tiny couch into the dining room to the hallway. The little girl of 3 waited in front of the door clutching a teddy bear to her chest and an awaiting smile on her lips. Her short hair had been tied up into two little pig tails on either side of her head beaming with cuteness.

Now she was just waiting for her mother.  

She could hear the car pulling into the driveway before recognizing footsteps heading toward the white door. The sound of a key being inserted into the doorknob sparked the air before it turned and the door opened.

“Mommy!” Mi Yun screamed jumping hysterically.

“Hi, sweetie! What are you doing here? Were you waiting for me?” Namjoo asked picking her daughter up. “Did you have a good day? What did you do today?”

“I played a puzzle,” Mi Yun replied grasping onto Namjoo’s shoulder. “Daddy here?”

Namjoo smiled at her little girl before her mother walked out of the kitchen, “Oh you’re home? Are you hungry?”

“Did Mi Yun eat?” Namjoo asked closing the door behind her and let her daughter down. “Go play with your toy.”

“She ate,” her mother replied.

Namjoo set down her purse on the table by the door and walked into the kitchen.

“Namjoo, your father and I are worried. Why don’t you come stay with us? It’ll be a lot safer for Mi Yun,” her mother turned to follow her. “It’ll make things easier. Huh? How about it?”

“It’s fine,” Namjoo pulled the fridge open to grab various ingredients for a sandwich.

“Namjoo…”

“I said it’s fine, mom,” Namjoo slightly raised her voice before turning away.

She listened to her mother sigh, “I’m just worried. After the divorce Luhan barely finds time to come by. And now that you’ve quit the force, you don’t even know if he’s dead or alive. You’re just a woman all alone with a little girl who doesn’t understand anything. What if something happens and no one is able to help you? Mi Yun’s safety should always be your first priority.”

“Would you stop lecturing me,” Namjoo said without turning to her. “Luhan was here four weeks ago. He’s not dead. It’s not like I don’t know how to defend myself.”

Namjoo pressed her lips together and set the butter knife in her hand down.

“I’ll go see him tomorrow and see what’s up,” Namjoo promised, “anyway, I’m dropping Mi Yun off at Sungyeol’s tomorrow, so don’t come here.”

“I thought Luhan told you to stay away from him?”

“Well he’s not here anymore, is he?” Namjoo retaliated.

“Come stay with your dad and I. We know you better and Mi Yun knows us better.”

“Luhan’s parents might be angry if they find out. They’re going to throw a fit and ask why I didn’t leave Mi Yun with them instead. So no,” Namjoo pointed out.

Her mother heavily sighed once more, “If you still can’t get in touch with him, your father and I are going to take action.”

Namjoo side eyed her mom before she turned to walk away. From down the hallway she could hear her mother bidding Mi Yun farewell with a long kiss and hug before the door closed. Closing her eyes for a moment of frustration she pulled a chair out and sat down.

After a year of being home rested after giving birth to Mi Yun, Namjoo’s position in the force had already been filled. Thus unable to wait for another position she’d bitterly quit the force and resorted to finding a job elsewhere. Now that job was at the city hall as a secretary.

As always they were both aware of the difficulties of their jobs – her ex job. Luhan barely made it home a lot of nights leaving her with Mi Yun only. The little girl who barely got to see her father always cried for him. This stressed Namjoo out even more. When she asked Luhan to request for a vacation, he told her he couldn’t because an important mission was coming up. They had a fit. He didn’t come home for a week.

Namjoo felt distanced more than before. Even if Mi Yun had her dad it was also as if she didn’t have one. She knew Luhan wasn’t at fault and it was the demands of his job, but she didn’t want Mi Yun to grow up with a hole in her heart. And maybe…it was because Namjoo didn’t feel loved anymore.

After long hours of arguing they finally settled it and divorced bitterly. She would keep Mi Yun during the meantime, but Luhan would have to come pick her up every two weeks so she could stay with him for a few days until he was called in. Often those few days turned into a day or two. There was even once when Luhan had dropped Mi Yun off at her doorstep two in the morning. That totally pissed Namjoo off.

Luhan was scheduled to have come by two weeks ago, but he didn’t show up. Mi Yun stared out the window in the living room for hours on end waiting patiently for her father. The sight of her lone back broke Namjoo’s heart. No matter how many times she called Luhan, he didn’t pick up.

Even now she couldn’t get in touch with him.

She turned when she heard little footsteps scurrying through the hallway before Mi Yun appeared from around the corner. A sheet of paper was in her hand.

“Mommy! Mommy!” she called out. “Picture!”

She waved the paper out before Namjoo picked her up to sit on her lap and took the paper. There was a bright circle – the sun, sharp grass, and three stick people.

“Daddy, me, mommy!” Mi Yun explained pointing at each one.

“Awww…thanks. Mi Yun is a great artist; the best around,” Namjoo complimented.

Mi Yun twisted around; one of her pig tails brushing Namjoo’s face, “Mommy, when daddy come?”

“He’ll come,” Namjoo promised, “mommy will bring daddy.”

While cooking dinner that night she stared at the fridge where all Mi Yun’s drawings of the family were. How much longer was she going to go feeding Mi Yun white lies?

That night as she sat in her bedroom of the tiny house listening to Mi Yun’s breathing mixi into the silence she wondered if Luhan was ever planning to stop by. The days seemed to go by so slow. As the moon rose and the sun went down Namjoo felt like her world was dying a bit every day.

Sometimes she would think about how excited Luhan had been when she came home that day after being told she was pregnant. Those early happy days didn’t last very long. The commitment she’d made to her job had also died. When Luhan was barely around it also felt like the fluttering love in her heart also died.

Distance really killed it all. She rarely saw him and that built a hole in her heart. She didn’t want Mi Yun to have the same hole in her heart. Her precious daughter didn’t deserve it.

Mi Yun was so innocent and pure. She should be throwing regular tantrums daily, but all she talked about was her daddy; all she did was draw more pictures of the family. Namjoo had wanted to take the family portrait she and Luhan had taken a few weeks after Mi Yun was born down, but Mi Yun didn’t want it put away. The little girl missed her daddy and thinking about how Mi Yun yearned for him made Namjoo’s blood burn.

Couldn’t Luhan think of their daughter even a little bit to come and stop by? What kind of man was he!? That despicable jerk!

“Hey,” Sungyeol greeted running out of his apartment the next morning. Bending down with hands on knees he waved, “Hi, Mi Yun.”

Namjoo felt Mi Yun take a step closer to her before she said, “Sorry, hope it’s not a bother. I’ll be right back though.”

“Have you been able to reach Luhan?”

“No.”

Sungyeol heaved a sigh before smiling, “I’m sure everything will turn all right.”

“Lets hope so.” Turning to Mi Yun she said, “Go to uncle. I will come get you later, ok?”

Namjoo watched Mi Yun turn to look at Sungyeol with uncertainty before looking back at her.

“Daddy no here?”

Namjoo smiled brightly and patted her head, “I will bring daddy. I promise.”

Placing a peck on Mi Yun’s cheek she bid farewell before driving off. Luhan’s apartment was on the other side of town. They’d both left the home the two of them had bought together; leaving behind everything they both owned. Namjoo didn’t want memories and she didn’t think Luhan wanted memories either.

She saw a family of birds fly overhead before pulling into the parking lot of the apartment and stared up at the window to his apartment. Namjoo’s only objective was to confirm if he was still in town or not. If he was, she’d give him a piece of her mind. If he wasn’t, well she might have to come up with another plan. Perhaps…stop by the workplace she had resigned from 3 years ago.

Namjoo rode the rich silver elevator up to the 12^th floor and turned every which hallway before arriving at room 1224. The silver block of medal that served as the door looked clean as always and sturdy as usual. While reaching for the doorbell she felt her eyes scan the door before she caught a slight crack.

The door wasn’t fully closed.

The spindle of the doorknob hadn’t gone all the way through. Namjoo felt her instincts fire up. Either Luhan was too much in a hurry that he’d forgotten to close the door well enough or someone had broken in. And she was leaning toward the latter. Luhan wasn’t a reckless person, she knew that for sure.

Namjoo reached her hand into her purse and reached for the door with her other one. After confirming that no one was around she slowly pulled the door open and without a noise entered.

There was a very short grand hallway of rich white tiles leading her in with an entryway into the kitchen on the left and the living room on the right further ahead. Namjoo twitched her ears to listen for any noise possible as she crept by. The heavy silence in the apartment made her heart thump a little faster. It’d been a while since she’d had to face one of these oppositions.

She eyed the closed curtains of the huge windows before spotting the open door to his bedroom. Namjoo eyed it for a few seconds trying to catch any shadow possible before starting toward the room. To be honest, she was very nervous. Her skills had probably dulled and she wasn’t as strong as she used to be. Namjoo could only hope for the best.

Holding her breath she reached a foot into his bedroom and glanced at the made bed then to the closet. No one so far. It was all good until she turned to stare at the door that had been turned to the wall. All would be well if there was no one hiding behind the door.

Holding her breath again she reached for the door and gripped it lightly with her fingers before gulping. Upon swinging the door open she only caught sight of something black before his fist slammed her across the face. Namjoo bounced back onto the bed before quickly turning back to see him lunge at her. His hands were reached out ready to strangle her and just in time Namjoo pulled the gun out of her purse slamming him across the head with it. He bolted to the side with a grunt.

Pulling herself up with a heavy pant she kicked him to the ground when he rose and kneed him in the chest before holding the gun fearlessly to his face. Namjoo glanced at the middle aged man with a slight beard growing on his face. There were deep wrinkles defining the age of his face, but Namjoo didn’t see danger in him. She’d learned though, that appearances were certainly deceiving. When this man didn’t look dangerous, he was dangerous. 

“Who are you? What are you doing here?”

“I won’t hurt you,” he pleaded, “let me go.”

He tried to rise, but Namjoo held him back down. She skimmed the gun up the side of his face then to his temple threateningly, “So, are you going to answer me or not.”

“All right…j…just don’t shoot,” he held his hands out pleadingly.

#####

Luhan poked his head out of the tiny alley guarded by trash cans, strays, and litter. He could smell something sour and fought to withhold the urge to vomit. It was even worse than when Mi Yun needed a diaper change.

Feeling his jacket for the gun he’d hidden earlier he peered across the street over filled with non-stop traffic. These cars, he’d learned long ago, didn’t stop for anyone. If he was spotted and chased here, it’d be difficult to get out of sight again.

his lower lip nervously, he glanced around to confirm that he wasn’t being followed then stepped out of the hidden alley and started down the sidewalk. Lowering his head he adjusted his jacket over him in order to kill the tension. Glancing out the corner of his eyes he then mixed himself into a large crowd waiting to cross an intersection up ahead. Once inside the crowd he pulled the hood of his jacket over his head and hurried along.

After a long walk he finally turned into the old ghostly hotel he’d checked himself into before climbing the creaky stairs to his room. He couldn’t afford to hide in a well off hotel at the moment. He could easily be discovered was what he’d figured out during his second day there.

Luhan was still confused about what was going on, but he still had time to figure out everything. That was only if he wasn’t caught first.

Shutting the door to his room he turned around to glance at his empty room before dropping into a chair in front of the window. There was a door to the bathroom upon entrance and the bed to his left. A table and two chairs sat beside the bed and he had nothing else with him.

If he had been more careful earlier on, he wouldn’t be in this situation. Now…he just needed to find a way out.

#####

Stupid Luhan. Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!

How could he have gotten himself wrapped into such things!? He knew things like that were forbidden as an agent. Luhan was aware he was violating rules, so why was he doing it!? What was he thinking!?

All the way in Bangkok!?

Namjoo felt like slamming her head against the wall.

“Mommy,” Mi Yun called out splashing in the water. “What mommy thinking?”

Namjoo glanced down at Mi Yun before running her hand over her wet hair then pulled her over. They were taking a bath and Namjoo was hoping the warmth of the water would help ease her body. Suddenly she felt sore from the fight she’d had earlier in the day.

“I’m thinking, I’m going to go find daddy,” Namjoo spoke, “you want daddy, right?”

“Mm!” Mi Yun nodded before smiling so enthusiastically Namjoo felt her heart break. “Mommy find daddy!”

“I will find him and bring him back to you, mommy promise,” Namjoo smiled before pinky swearing with the little girl. “Turn around. I need to scrub your back.”  

Namjoo felt a depth of emptiness and sorrow spiral into her. Her 3 year old daughter still needed her father. Luhan couldn’t possibly make it back by himself if he was alone out there. He didn’t even know what kind of situation he was in.

“You’re right, mom,” Namjoo told over the phone. “Why don’t I let Mi Yun stay with you and dad for a while? I’m going to go on a vacation.”

“Vacation!? You’re just going to leave your daughter behind? What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking; I need a little time. To fix myself, to figure things out,” Namjoo explained. “I will call back often to talk to Mi Yun. I’ve already talked things over with her.”

“You can’t do this, Namjoo! She needs you! What’s gotten into you!? ”

“Mom, please,” Namjoo deepened the tone of her voice and witnessed her mom’s expression change. “For a month, a month then I’ll be back.”

“What’s going on, Namjoo? Did something happen?” her mom’s voice held seriousness and concern, but Namjoo couldn’t tell them what she was up to.

“I’m bringing Mi Yun during the weekend. If Luhan’s parents say anything, I’ll deal with them when I come back.” Namjoo promised.

That weekend she brought with her a luggage of Mi Yun’s clothes and toys to her parents’ place. Lifting Mi Yun up in the yard Namjoo gave her a tight hug and kissed her plenty times only to feel those small hands around her face. Those big bright eyes shone into her with optimism and faith.  

“Mommy bring daddy home,” Mi Yun smiled.

Namjoo hugged her once more before setting her down and held her by her small arms, “Be a good girl. Don’t get angry with grandma and grandpa. Mommy will miss you.”

Unable to part with her little girl Namjoo hugged her tightly once more.

“I love you, Mi Yun.” Namjoo kissed her again her hair. “I’ll be back. I promise.”

After watching Mi Yun go into the house, Namjoo left for the airport. An hour later she stared at the flight schedule board for a long time before finally boarding the plane to Bangkok.