Chapter 7

Seunghyun’s first and involuntary reaction was the widening of his eyes.
“Ani…” he stammered while Youngbae was carefully examining his reaction. He kept his eyes focused on his hyung, but the latter didn’t say anything else. At this exact moment, he so desperately wanted to leave the kitchen.
Youngbae then placed his hand on Seunghyun’s shoulder.
“You know you can talk to me,” he reassured him.
After nodding once, he dropped his hand, and sat down in the chair opposite of Seunghyun so they could have a proper conversation.

They sat there for a while, but none of them said anything. Youngbae was waiting for Seunghyun to start talking, and Seunghyun simply had no clue as to how to actually start.
“Why don’t you just start at the beginning,” Youngbae urged him.
As a response he received another nod, then a sigh. Seunghyun kept staring at his cup, even though the coffee it was holding had already been drunk by now.

“You know Daesung’s always meant a lot to me,” he finally started.
Youngbae still didn’t say anything; he wanted to let Seunghyun do the talking while he was attentively listening.
“We’ve always been… close.”
Without lifting his head, he took a cursory glimpse at the younger, to see his reaction, but then decided it would be better not to look.
“And somewhere along the way, he had become more than just a friend to me.”
He started pushing the cup between his hands. Left. Right. Left. Right.
“I was sure Daesung didn’t feel the same way, and I’m fully aware of what it would do to us, to him, if anything were to happen between us.”
Left. Right. Left. Right.
“So I decided not to act on it.”
Left. Right. Left.
“But… I… We…”
Right.
“Before…”
Youngbae placed his hand on top of the cup so Seunghyun would stop moving it, and then pulled it away. Seunghyun looked up, and then decided to just get it out. Pretend it was a bandage; it would hurt less if he’d pull it off all at once.

“But before he went on his D’scover tour… We had a moment.”
“A moment?”
This was the first time Youngbae had spoken, and for a reason, Seunghyun was grateful for it. He didn’t like carrying a conversation on his own.
“We kissed.”
“Just kissed?”
“Ani...”
Seunghyun lowered his head again. This was simply too embarrassing to talk about.
“Daesung was telling me how nervous he was about going to Japan, and I told him