Victoria’s ankles sank in the rain as she looked down the stair way. It was like a small waterfall, the heavy rain over-flowing on the steps. She sat down on the ground, and spread out her tired legs on the steps. The rain felt heavenly on her and she felt much better. She spread out her arms like wings, and closed her eyes. For some reasons, tears spilled out from her eyes, but she couldn’t tell from her tears and the rain.

                She smiled a pitiful smile. Victoria got up, but because of her weak legs, she fell and slid down a couple of steps. With all her strength, she grabbed the railing, and panted. She felt so much in pain. She felt bruises starting to form and her head pounded, the blood roaring in her ears. Fumbling for a tighter grip on the pole, Victoria got up and carefully went back up the stairs with a gritted determination. She felt like collapsing on the spot, but she held it in and limped back to her hospital room.

                When she opened the door, she couldn’t look up. Her neck hurt too much. She slipped and fell on the floor. From that point, she couldn’t move at all. Whenever she tried to get back up, her legs protested in pain and she would give up. She massaged both legs weakly and brushed off the rain on them.

                Suddenly, two strong hands pulled her up back on her feet. The hands lifted her and put her back in her bed. Victoria, shocked, looked up and saw Nichkhun. He was looking at her, pain flashing in his own eyes, and his hands slightly smudged with blood.

                Blood?

                Victoria looked at her legs. They were bleeding from her fall down the stairs. She quickly covered them with the blanket and looked at Nichkhun once again.

                Without a word, Nichkhun sat on a chair next to the bed. He looked at her, then at the letter, then her legs, and then back to her.

                Victoria trembled, obviously waiting for what he was going to say.

                Then, Nichkhun burst into tears. Angry sobs filled the room and sadness clouded around them. Victoria hovered, wondering how to handle this. Her heart broke seeing Nichkhun like this. Before she could speak, he finally spoke, his voice cracked and rough and angry.

               “Why is it that whenever I try to forget about you, you just pull me back in? Why is it that when I try not to love you, I just happen to love you more? Why did I even fall in love with you? Why do you give me so much pain? What did I deserve for this? What did you deserve to end up like this? Why-“

                Nichkhun trailed off, his voice getting caught in his throat. His hands trembled violently and he stared at Victoria, his eyes suddenly desperate, even pleading.

                “Why do I love you?” he whispered.

                Victoria blinked, but she didn’t answer.

                “Why do I love you, why?” he repeated, tears streaming down his face.

                Victoria started crying as well. She lifted her shaking, wet hands and placed them on Nichkhun’s face.

                “Look at me, appa. It’s okay, look at me.”

                Nichkhun was startled at the words. She had said the exact same thing when he had broken up with her.

                Victoria gave a small smile, the tears falling down more. She didn’t bother to wipe them away.

                “I must have been such an inconvenience, such a bother,” Victoria murmured, chuckling slightly to herself. “To, cause such pain for Nichkhun.”

                “I am so sorry,” Victoria finally whispered.