Doctor Moore eventually slipped out of the room, promising to come back a little later - after Luhan and Kris had a few minutes to catch up. Luhan, strictly speaking, wasn’t supposed to be on the bed with Kris, but the doctor left without comment when he saw the relief on Kris’ face. He had to keep the best interest of his patient in mind, after all, and Luhan was doing more for Kris than any medication he could prescribe.

“I’m not really sure where to start.” Luhan admitted once Kris had settled into his side. He let his head fall back on the pillow and carded his fingers through Kris’ hair quietly for a long moment, and Kris closed his eyes at the touch. “I guess...do you remember that day a bunch of us missed school? Tao said it was just you and him that day. I had an interview so Minseok had to stay home with Sehunnie. Remember?”

Kris nodded quietly, wondering briefly if Luhan was nervous about something. He was usually right to the point, but he was rambling a lot. Kris glanced down at where his hand was curled into the bottom of Luhan’s shirt, then looked away again. He didn’t really want to acknowledge that, either. Luhan nodded once.

“The interview was for a job at a law firm. I want to be a lawyer, kind of.” Luhan said. “I want to be an advocate for children. I want to be their voice, when they don’t have one. A guardian ad litem. I’m too young right now, but they’re basically paying me to keep the place clean while I learn what I can through them. I’m going to have to go to school for it, obviously, but it looks good if I already have a job at a law firm. You know?”

“I...I guess so?” Kris mumbled. “Why do you want to do that?”

“Have you looked at our group? Half of us are adopted.” Luhan said, and Kris pressed his lips together. “You, me, and Lay all came from the same agency in China. Tao’s lucky he met Minseok while he was here...and Jongin’s lucky Baekhyun’s mother pays attention. I’m lucky I got adopted. Sehun’s lucky I got adopted.”

“Lay’s lucky Umma wanted to adopt him when he was little.” Kris mumbled. Luhan was quiet as he ran his fingers through Kris’ hair again.

“Yeah.” Luhan finally said. “But not everyone gets lucky like that. Sometimes you don’t get adopted until you’re older, and sometimes you need someone to stand up for you.”

“So you’re here to stand up for me?” Kris asked, raising a brow. Luhan laughed softly and hugged Kris a little tighter.

“Something like that.” Luhan said softly. He frowned a little bit, looking around the room. “I’m here to make sure you’re okay. Haerin’s worried about you.”

“Why?” Kris mumbled, sighing quietly. He knew his anxiety was a little out of hand, but he didn’t think it was worth sending an entire human to another country just to babysit his emotions. Kris wasn’t convinced he was worth that much.

“The doctor talked to you about your heart, right?” Luhan asked, and Kris shrugged.

“Yeah. Something about a relapse. Something lapse.” Kris made a face as he tried to remember. “Just that there’s a malfunctioning valve. It’s just the murmur.”

“Okay.” Luhan’s frown deepened, sitting up a little more. “Haerin didn’t want to tell you too soon. She thought it would be better to wait until after all of this was over, but it’s complicated now. We didn’t expect you to get sick.”

“I’m not sick.” Kris muttered. “I just-”

“Fainted. Because you had a panic attack that put too much strain on your heart.” Luhan said flatly. “Because severe anxiety and heart palpitations are a symptom of Mitral Valve Prolapse. Which you have.”

“I’m fine.” Kris insisted, breaking eye contact. Luhan scraped his nails along Kris’ scalp.

“You’re not.” Luhan said softly. “You need to have surgery. There’s a valve in your heart that’s supposed to keep blood flowing through the heart chambers so it’s all processed correctly. Yours isn’t doing that at all - the blood is flowing backwards in one spot, which is why your heart feels funny sometimes. Too much stress...it’s really not good for you. It makes you faint and it’s why you can’t catch your breath sometimes. You start feeling anxious and your heart starts working harder, and then you can’t catch your breath because your heart isn’t working the right way. Does that make sense? We have to get you fixed up so it doesn’t seriously hurt you later.”

Kris sat straight up in his bed, his hand coming up to his chest as what Luhan was saying started to sink in. He his lips and shook his head, already feeling the creep of anxiety crawling up his spine. Luhan grabbed his hand.

“Breath.” Luhan said sternly. “You’re not going in for surgery until we get back to Korea. We’ll all be there. You’re going to the hospital where Haerin and Minseok work. They know all the doctors there. You’ll be fine.”

“I just want to go home.” Kris whimpered, and Luhan softened, pulling Kris back into his side.

“That’s why I’m here.” Luhan said. “To get you home safely. We’re from the same agency, and I can speak as someone who took in an orphaned minor. And as someone who knows both you and the family that wants to adopt you. Plus...they kind of figure having someone you know around will help keep you calm. They really need you to stay calm, so we can get this done quickly and bring you home.”

“They want me to move back to China.” Kris whispered. “My birth parents. They want me to live with them, all of a sudden.”

“I know.” Luhan said, rubbing Kris’ back gently. “We just have to tell them you already have a family, that’s all.”

Kris was quiet as he made himself as small as he could, curling into Luhan’s side like the elder could actually keep him safe. Luhan had a momentary flashback to Kris’ feverish cuddling, and wondered if Kris really was coming down with something. Kris sniffed quietly.

“Can you tell them?” Kris asked, his voice a little too damp for his own liking. Luhan squeezed his shoulder.

“We can tell them together.” Luhan offered, and Kris took a shaky breath as he shook his head.

“I don’t want to see them.” Kris said stubbornly, and Luhan looked at Kris strangely because he’d never actually heard Kris whine before. There were tears slipping down his face, though, and Luhan was used to crying at least. He lived with two of the most emotional human beings he’d ever met, and he wiped away a few tears. “I just want to go home.”

“Do you want to call Umma?” Luhan asked, glancing at his watch and then picking up the iPad. She should still be up - and realistically speaking, there should be a few spare kids at her house, too. She’d mentioned more than once about the house feeling too empty and not liking leaving Lay alone while she was working. Luhan had offered her Sehun easily. Kris pulled the blanket up so it covered most of his face and shook his head.

“No.” Kris mumbled, the tears coming out a little faster now. He was overwhelmed with all the information Luhan had given him, and he was exhausted from trying to make it all fit into a neat little box. He wanted Umma and Lay and Tao but he was honestly just grateful to have Luhan. He was grateful to have anyone who would try to make him feel better, but he didn’t want to be a burden on anyone when he was so upset. It was bad enough Luhan had to deal with him.

“Why not?” Luhan asked. Kris tensed up, and Luhan thought he was going to pull away for a second, but he just cuddled closer instead. “Kris, come on. You have to talk about it.”

“I don’t want to. I just want to go home.” Kris said, his voice trembling under the weight of his emotions. Luhan kissed his head and hugged him a little closer as Kris really started breaking down, his breath hitching awkwardly and his voice weirdly squeaky. “Why can’t we just go home?”

“We will soon.” Luhan promised, still trying to comfort him as he maneuvered the iPad to make a call. Kris’ head snapped up when he heard the ringing, and he was about to tell Luhan off (in a broken mix of Korean and Mandarin) when Tao suddenly appeared on the screen. Kris couldn’t help himself, and he took the iPad from Luhan, not caring how he looked because he just missed his boyfriend.

Tao didn’t seem to care how he looked either as he set about comforting Kris with quiet words and promises that everything would be okay. Kris refused to let go of the iPad, even when the doctor came back to check on him.