“He doesn’t want to go?” Lay asked, blinking. Umma shook her head, shrugging, and Lay frowned a bit. “But he said it while he was sleeping?”

“Yes.” Umma said. “He asked me not to go, a few times, and then he said he wanted to stay.”

“Are you going to adopt him, then?” Minseok asked, sitting in a chair with Luhan in his lap. Minseok and Luhan may have been high school kids, but they were probably the best ones to talk to about this. They knew first hand what it was to take in a kid that wasn’t biologically theirs, but they also knew Kris on a personal, almost peer level.

“I think you should.” Luhan spoke up, and Minseok tapped his hip gently, shaking his head.

“She’s not asking us to tell her what to do, she just wants someone to talk to.” Minseok said sternly, and Luhan sighed before nodding.

“He hasn’t asked me to adopt him.” Umma pointed out, looking at her hands with a frustrated expression. “I don’t want to make him feel stuck.”

“But he said he wants to stay.” Lay said, blinking, and Umma nodded. “He’s afraid of being alone, you know.”

“What do you mean?” Umma asked, looking at Lay in mild surprise. He could be unusually perceptive at times, but this seemed like something she would have caught on to.

“When he turns 18. He’s afraid he won’t have anyone.” Lay explained. “He keeps waiting for someone to tell him he won’t be alone.”

Umma nodded quietly for a moment, air in her cheeks as she nodded, mulling over what she’d been told. Kris was still in bed - in her bed, specifically - and probably would be for a few more days. School was back in session, but Kris was out of commission, still barely eating. Umma let him have that, but she refused to compromise on water, forcing him to drink it all day and making sure he took his fever reducers. The doctors had said he should be rushed back to the hospital if his fever spiked again, despite the fact that it still hadn’t broken, and that the vomiting would stop soon too. He just needed rest and warmth.

“I’ll have to think for a little while about it.” Umma said. “I’m on call at the hospital tonight, probably pulling doubles the next few days to make up for the unplanned time off. Are you sure it’s alright for you to stay?”

The question was directed at Minseok and Luhan, both of whom nodded right away. “Tao will stay here and help us, and Sehun will be overjoyed to stay with Kai.”

“Oh, I’m sure he will.” Umma said, chuckling and rolling her eyes. She had caught Sehun and Kai in some pretty compromising positions over the last few years, at first just making out, and then starting last year, hands in each others pants. She was sure they had taken it past that by now, but thankfully they seemed to have figure out that discretion was important.

“Well, I’ll go call the school and Baekhyun’s mother.” Luhan said, popping off of Minseok’s lap and heading into the other room. Lay huffed a little bit and looked at Umma.

“I think he puts up those walls because no one ever tries to break them down.” Lay said, nodding and getting up. “I’m going to go lay down with him. He shivers a lot if I don’t.”

Umma blinked, watching Lay head to her bedroom and slip inside before looking at Minseok, her head falling heavy into her hand.

“What do you think?” She finally asked. “I haven’t adopted since Lay, and he was just a baby at the time. There wasn’t a whole lot of talking about it happening, just a lot of love.” she said, then smiled nostalgically. “Lay stuck to me like velcro for the first three weeks after I brought him home. He cried if I tried to get him to sleep in his own room. Kris is so...closed off. I just don’t know how to react to him sometimes.”

“You need to do what’s best for you and Lay, first.” Minseok said, his tone serious. “How would Lay feel about Kris living here permanently? And how would he feel about losing Kris forever? Then ask yourself how you would feel in those situations. It’s okay to be selfish, this time, whether that means keeping him or sending him packing. There’s no obligation. Just think about it.”

Umma nodded slowly, then sighed and stood up, going to the fridge and pulling out the big pot of soup she’d made the night before. It was chicken noodle soup, not something she had a whole lot of experience with, but she knew it was common in North American homes and she was hoping it would be enough to get Kris to eat something. She started heating it up, then spooned some into a bowl and looked at Minseok.

“I have a lot to think about, I guess.” She said, nodding softly. “But I also have to get ready for work. I know I usually give you and Luhan my bed when I’m away for overnights, but I’d prefer if Kris wasn’t moved. His room gets the coldest in the entire house, and my room stays the warmest.”

Minseok nodded in understanding and took the bowl from her. “It’s alright, I’ll take care of them. Go get ready for work.” Minseok said, smiling and heading to her bedroom.

Kris was curled up, looking exhausted and defeated as Lay curled around him. Kris was much too big to be little spoon to anyone, and it was comical for Minseok to see as he sat on the edge of the bed, soup in hands. Kris, for his part, moved his head slightly in a way that made Minseok think he might actually be interested in the food being offered, so he waited for Kris to sit up before handing him the bowl.

Kris ate slowly, and he didn’t eat a lot, definitely less than half of what was in the bowl, but it was something, and it made Minseok and Lay feel a lot better. Kris settled down into the covers again though, almost immediately after, and all but passed out. Luhan came along a minute later and sighed, throwing himself on the bed and resting his head on Kris’ knees.

“He’s not shivering.” Luhan commented, and Lay shook his head.

“He was before I came in though.” Lay said, and Minseok frowned.

“If he was cold he would keep shivering for a while after you laid down.” Minseok said, then watched as Lay shrugged and Luhan’s face lit up.

“Maybe he doesn’t want to be alone.” Luhan said, and Minseok actually rolled his eyes.

“He’s not alone. Never. He has me and Umma.” Lay whispered, petting Kris’ hair gently for a long moment before sighing. “I just wonder if we have him, too.”

Luhan and Minseok looked at one another, surprised by Lay’s random lucidity, but they didn’t say anything about it. Kris looked almost small wrapped up in layers of blankets and a too-big long-sleeved t-shirt - how they had found anything too big for him was a mystery to them all, but he looked almost comfortable, despite the fever flush of his cheeks and his sweat-grimed hair. Lay looked up when he heard the door close and frowned.

“She’s going to be so tired by the end of the week.” Lay mumbled, shifting and knocking into Kris, causing the elders eyes to open before quickly closing again with a groan. “Sorry, gege..”

Kris didn’t comment, just pressed a hand to his forehead, and Xiumin immediately checked the medication log. He was due for another dose of fever reducer, which explained why he was so red in the first place.

By the time Tao made it to the house from school he had a very grumpy Sehun on his tail, and brought with him a whole slew of confusion. Apparently, Baekhyun had a dentist appointment and his mother was too busy trying to get him to stop wailing to take Sehun right away, but she promised to pick him up after.

“He’s afraid of the dentist, you know that.” Tao mumbled, and Sehun pouted harder.

“I’m afraid of contracting Canada-itis, but I’m not crying about it.” Sehun spit bitterly, and Lay glared.

“Go take a nap or something, grump.” He mumbled, and Kris opened his eyes sleepily, smiling when he saw Tao. Lay sighed and moved away from Kris, going to make Sehun leave the room, and Tao immediately settled into the blankets with Kris, wrapping his arms around the elder and settling in.

“Hey.” Kris mumbled in English, pulling Tao a bit closer, too. Tao smiled.

“Hey.” He said back, then switched to Mandarin. “How are you feeling?”

“Better.” Kris said, relieved at the switch to Mandarin. He could speak Mandarin on his death bed with ease. It fit better in his mouth. “I missed you.”

Tao was quiet for a long moment, glancing up to be sure no one had come back to the room and heard what he’d said. As far as he knew, Minseok and Luhan were making dinner, and Lay was trying to pacify Sehun. He looked back at Kris and settled in a little closer.

“That fever’s certainly doing a number on you.” Tao said. “I could have sworn you said you missed me.”

“I did.” Kris said, his eyes still glazed out and his voice still weak. “If you chose to believe it or not, that’s up to you. But it’s true.”

“You’re sick.” Tao said, not sure what else to say. Kris was being oddly...human. Like he had emotions, suddenly. It was weird.

“Tao, if I have to move far away..” Kris mumbled. “Will you care if I find a way back?”

“Where would you go?” Tao asked, and Kris shook his head, so Tao smiled. “I would care.”

“Good.” Kris mumbled, starting to fall asleep again.

Maybe it was the fever. Maybe it was the utter exhaustion. Maybe it was was just something he wanted to do, and he finally stopped caring enough about holding back. He couldn’t explain the timing, so suddenly, but he knew why he kissed Tao’s cheek just before he dozed. He just didn’t want to explain it.