Step 1:       Ask Yourself

Before you actually go for ‘making-that-badass-fall-in-love-with-you’, ask yourself a few questions

Are you sure you want to do this out of love?

Is the gangster really the one?

Life with gangs is dangerous, are you ready for it?

Are you ready for sacrifices?

Are you sure you love that person? Is he or she worth it? Life with gangs is dangerous and you know that, an ordinary person like the one you love can be hurt if you pulled him or her into your world. Are you ready for sacrifices to protect him or her?

Miyu's mind is completely filled with those questions from the book. She have panda eyes due to her lack of sleep last night. She tried to but when she read the first step it keeps bugging her.

It seems that the book is warning her that life with gangs is dangerous. Well, it is really stated there, mind you.

She just sighed and boringly tap your notebook with your pen. *Do I want to do this out of love? What was that? Is that question means if . . . I really love L.Joe?*

It seems that that question is new to her. She didn't really asked herself about what she feels about L.Joe because she thought she need not to. She knows in her heart that she does and eventually, will make the bad boy fall in love with her too. 

“Miyu, can you answer this question on the board please?” Miss Han, her math teacher called her. She gulped. Wow, so much for being a wallflower and a girl that just fades.

Miss Han must be sick to know she exists during her class and not just when she checks test papers and see Miyu's perfect mark. Yup, she's good in this class but this time, she weren’t listening. Instead of Xs and Ys that is in her mind, it is full of Ls and Joes.

She slowly got up from her seat, some nerds that listens, finally noticing her. Just then, the bell rang.

Saved by the bell, she sighed in relief but her thoughts didn't escape her. Still thinking about the questions and asking herself silently, she arranged her stuff, got up and walked to the cafeteria.

Miyu brought herself a lunch, a nice simple meal of kimchi, meat and rice.  She sat on an empty table in the corner and quietly ate. 

Her mind traveled back to what she is thinking not long ago. She bit her lip and asked herself when she noticed no one is around her. “Why do I love L.joe?”.

Many things came in to her mind. Like how handsome he is and how cool he is being a gangster and at the same time a kingka on a school. And pretty much she is spazzing about him. But that is the same thoughts of any other fan girl who loves him even though it’s obvious that they don’t really love him in a deeper meaning. *I think I need a deeper reason* She thought.

Then memories flow into her mind. Memories when she first met the L.Joe.

Even when Miyu is just a little kid, her parents were busy at work that they need to leave really early. Too early for the little Miyu to wake up. Not having time to take care of their only child, they needed to take her to a day care center every day. She will wake up only to find that she's already there in the center. But not like now that they even go home late for her to wait for them, in the afternoon her parents will pick her up.

It didn’t take that long for her to get used to this set up. 

She didn’t mind being alone because she's not fond of having someone as a friend. She don’t talk to someone if they didn’t start the conversation.

The kids there don’t want to play with her either saying that she's a snob. But no one actually talked to her; people said that she is some loner and just wanted to be like that so they didn’t disturb her, even until now.

Then L.Joe came, no, not L.Joe. But Lee Byunghyun came.

He was the first one to talk to Miyu or even tried to. It was a simple conversation though with only few words spoken. But it is enough for to feel lonely for the first time and long for someone’s presence considering she didn't bother if she's not with her parents or anyone else like the other kids.

Enough to feel even great because that someone is there with her.

But that’s also the last day that Byunghyun went there.

The day where she made a friend, at least that's what she thinks. And also the day when she lost him.

He’s still on her mind even though she's still the girl with no friends and preferred to be alone like Byunghyun never existed.

When Miyu entered highschool, she concluded that fates really got bored sometimes and play tricks to people.

She saw Byunghyun again. Not wanting to have her spirits up, she just stayed put from where she is the social ladder, a background. She later on knew that he somewhat changed his name and is now famous. That everyone at school knew him as a part of the gang in their district which is Teen Top, the ever-so great L.Joe.

Realizing that he already forgot her, she just kept quiet and hid her feelings. Not doing anything to make L.Joe notice her again, until now.

Then something snapped her out of her thoughts. Reality hit her.*You’re the first one, no, the only one who made me realize that having someone beside you is one of the most special thing in the world. . . . I don’t love L.Joe.

I love . . . Lee Byunghyun*

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thanks to alystar @ Stardom Designs [Click!] for the cutesy poster~