--- For quite sometime, both jay and Chaerin became estranged from each other, eventhoug they cancealed their suffering they couldn't look into each other's eyes, Chaerin avoided him and barely exchanged words during their practices. Somehow, Chaerin felt like suffocating and was thinking of quiting the group but she couldn't for the sake of the others and there was not the right timing to back down after all they've been through, practicing so hard. It has almost been a week since the incident, eventhough jay restored his friendship with Taemin and Minzy, it was hard for him to open up to Chaerin. Indeed, he couldn't bear to cause her further suffering but at the same time he missed her: looking at her from afar as she was focused studying, while she walked past him, at the cafeteria; he couldn't help but stare at her. She was there in front of him but yet so far that he couldn't reach her. The more she distanced herself from him, the more he yearned for her. Sometimes, it felt like he was stalking her: stealing gazes at her, following to her work and waiting for her to get home as he walked right behind her, with each moment thinking of going to her to tell her everything but then, he just couldn't and he would just turn back away from her. ---

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                      Chaerin made up her mind to try to forget him but her mind, body and heart do not follow her thought. Her everything asked for Jay, she would give her all to be with him, to feel again what he made her feel. Her days weren't the same without him: his touch, his breath, his eyes, his lips... she couldn't deny the feelings she had for him but she couldn't forget either. This feeling of being rejected was the hardest of all as she felt like her degnity was stained with dirt and she couldn't allow that. Her days became dull and she silently prayed for time to pass quickly because being in the same room as him made her feel like a prisoner in her own heart, those walls felt like pressing her against him, he was just there behind her that she could almost feel his breath behind her ears which made her feel this urge to get out there. Thankfully, it was the end of the class as the clock at 15:00: Chaerin hurridly gathered her stuff and quickly left the room while Jay was still thinking whether he should go after her and if he does; what can he say? How could he explain? But, unconsciously, he found himself running after her ignoring Jongyup who tried to talk to him: "Hey ...Jay ...wait ...I..."

                           Chaerin knew that Jay was chasing her so she speeded up but unknowingly jay caught up with her and took her arm while he tried to speak through his breathlessness: "Just wait...I really need to talk to you...I..." but he got interrupted as Chaerin through this fierce gaze at him that made him petrifiedd for a moment; she turned to him angrily as her hair flipped violently to the back of her head: "What are you gonne say ...Jay...what?...Just let me go ...you don't have to say anything...let me go!!" she ordered him but Jay insisted on talking to her eventhough he kept wondering about what to tell her. He took her hand from the wrist and dragged her into a reserved corner behind the school throwing her against the wall. He felt sorry for a second but he soon got distracted by those eyes that the more he looked into them, the more he felt drowned in them, like they were calling for him. He draw closer to her putting her hands behind her back and holding them still so she won't fight back. jay spoke to her with his forehead against hers fighting this agonizing and yet exciting feeling of physical attraction and restrained himself from kissing her:

"I don't know what am I supposed to say?...I ...what I ...know ...is that..." but Chaerin interrupted him: "Jay...just forget it..let me just let me..." but Jay stopped her trying to control himself as Chaerin was trying to leave him: "just ...don't say it...I ..I ..." but there again why those words can't escape from his mouth, Why was it so hard to say: "I love you?" But instead, he said to her with the most sensual voice as he caressed her hair so gently that he felt her loossening up against him: "I miss you. i miss you every day. I miss you every night. I miss you every night. I miss you every second ...just whenever I breathe, with every heartbeat. Whenever I close or open my eyes you are there not only inside my head but in my heart ...I see you but I can't feel you, it's like ...I don't know what I'm saying...I..."

                         Chaerin looked at him with tears filling in her eyes, took a long breath but without notice, she just pushed him. But Jay held on to her hand: "just wait...Chaerin...I ..."  As she left in a hurry, she didn't notice that she lost her bracelet (necklece). Jay was about to follow her when he saw it on the ground; he picked it up and couldn't believe his eyes. 

"it doesn't make any sense...this ...this is ...wait" as he pulled back his own to compare them. Chaerin's neckless had a small star that fit in perfectly into his bigger star, which put together formed a 'sun'. 

"No way ....this can't be..." indeed how can he forget the neckleces he made with his own hands? 

"What does this supposed to mean...so, all along...she is ...." but couldn't believe it as he leant on the wall gazing into the sky. He smiled looking at the blue sky, so clear but soon tears run over his cheek: the one he tried to to prevent himself from loving was the his first love..."How should he take it? How life can be so harsh with him? It should didn't give him a break!" he thought....

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I still don't know where my inspiration and imagination would take me. Jay Park is such an amazing person just looking at pictures of him, I can't help my wild imagination flourishing with many scenes that even sometimes my dreams get tangled with him.

Besides, his latest appearance on Immortal Song2 is like so amazing ...just check it out...he has amazing eyes and voice...a GREAT PERFORMER. 

EVERYONE, HURRY AND CHECK IT OUT ^^