A/N: no i'm not about to end the decade without updating this fic first yall

---

 

 

Monochromatic Hearts

 

 

 

 

.

.

.

 

"Is that the new soloist from SM Ent.?" Kyungsoo's coursemate wondered aloud, humming in appraisal at some idol appearing on the cafeteria's television. "He doesn't look very Korean."

 

"Look, his actual name is Korean, though." One of them looked it up on the internet.

 

"He's good-looking."

 

Kyungsoo rummaged through the contents of his backpack, searching for his wallet. His coursemates have paid for their food and told Kyungsoo they would find a table, so he rushingly nodded while paying up for his, anxious about keeping the cashier and the line waiting.

 

Upon seated with his soup noodles, the topic of their conversation was apparently still ongoing. "I liked Yunho better."

 

One of the girls laughed. "Isn't he already pushing thirty?"

 

"Who cares? He's still hot."

 

Kyungsoo wasn't particularly interested in idols, so he just ate in silence while listening to his friends. It was a group of mostly females, with him and another one guy being the only males. Being in the beauty course, that was to be expected. At least here, Kyungsoo did not get bullied like in high school.

 

"The new guy dances better."

 

"I like what they did to his hair. D'you think we could pull that for our class?"

 

At the mention of hair, Kyungsoo's curiosity was piqued so he placed his chopsticks down and looked up - only to gape.

 

"Hm? What's wrong?" He heard his friend asking. "Do you know him, Kyungsoo?"

 

"We... went to the same high school..." He muttered, earning an uproar of excitement from his group of friends, some claiming disbelief. Kyungsoo was flustered and thought that maybe he shouldn't have brought that up. "I-It's true. But he transferred to SOPA halfway..."

 

They were still overwhelming Kyungsoo, but mostly with questions of how the rookie idol was like in their high school days. The questions fell on deaf ears, as Kyungsoo found himself astonished once again at the boy who used to shyly request of Kyungsoo's help back in high school, now standing confidently on stage. Kyungsoo was set to see that as a distant past, and made a resolve to cheer on this rookie idol silently, wherever he was.

 

.

.

.

 

Well, that idol is in Kyungsoo's apartment right now.

 

A lot goes through Kyungsoo's head, as he is seated on the floor while folding his laundry neatly with the cable news running on the television.

 

He sneaks a glance at his periphery, at the man standing by the sink in the kitchen, washing the plates and utensils priorly used by the two of them. His back looks so dreamy. He would never have thought Jongin would be doing dishes in his apartment.

 

Kyungsoo snaps out of himself when he hears a loud clang from the kitchen, presumably Jongin accidentally dropping some onto the aluminium surface of the sink. He quickly returns to folding his laundry with efficiency, face warm at the shame felt for staring just now.

 

For what it's worth, this sure is an awkward first week of dating... And the idol has seemingly made this apartment his second home, always stopping by to have dinner with Kyungsoo if there were no evening schedules, not that Kyungsoo's complaining. Most probably out of respect for Kyungsoo's privacy and as a way to rebuild trust in their newly shifted relationship, Jongin has also not once stayed the night since they started dating.

 

"We should get you a housekeeper." Jongin suddenly announces as soon as he finishes with the dishes and joins Kyungsoo in the living room.

 

"Oh..." Kyungsoo pales. He knew he should have stopped Jongin from doing the dishes after their dinner together. "I'm sorry. Y- You must be tired..."

 

Jongin turns away to stifle a laugh. "Really... What do you take me for?" The tone is playful, and maybe he's right, Kyungsoo should really stop viewing a situation pessimistically. "I'm saying it's for you. The housekeeper, I mean. You can't be moving around doing chores all day, the twins are gonna tire you out."

 

"It's manageable, though," Kyungsoo mumbles.

 

"Figured you'd say that," Jongin takes an article from the clean clothes hamper, and starts folding. "But if I deem it necessary, I will intervene, you know."

 

Kyungsoo places the shirt he has folded on the stack, and picks another article. Instead of folding it, he brings it to his face not to appreciate the fragrance, but to hide his blush. "I know."

 

-

 

"Good!... Beautiful!... Yes, could you do that one more time, please?... Excellent!... How are the shots coming out?"

 

Jongin finally takes it easy from all the poses, gratefully taking the offered bottle of mineral water while waiting for the photographer to check the shots with his assistants. 

 

When they finally announce that it's a wrap, Jongin immediately removes the platform boots and asks for his slides. He retreats to his waiting room before the scheduled magazine interview starts. His manager isn't there in the room and must be taking a walk outside, so Jongin closes the door and takes a seat on the couch, unlocking his phone. 

 

When Junmyeon returns, he brings with him a bag full of snacks. "Oh, you're finished with the shoot? You hungry?"

 

"A little." Jongin then asks what Junmyeon has bought.

 

Instead of answering, Junmyeon trudges over to the idol to hand a packed egg and ham sandwich and a can of energy drink, accidentally seeing something on Jongin's phone when the idol receives the food. "Wait, are you looking up schools?"

 

Jongin puts his phone to sleep mode while shooting his manager an unimpressed look. "...Nosey."

 

"Hey, don't be like that. I might have connections, you know."

 

"For schools?" Jongin looks at him ridiculously.

 

"Well yeah you got a point there. I'll leave schools to you." Junmyeon feigns a mildly displeased face. "The twin boys aren't even born yet, and you're already looking up schools. Just how excited are you about being a new father?"

 

"Jealous? You get a child too, then." Jongin retorts, actually looking smug.

 

"What's this about being a new father?" Minseok enters the room with a melon bread in his hand, half eaten. Jongin sees his own manager tense up, while he himself could not care less. Maybe he really has stopped giving damns about people knowing about it at this point. They are bound to know about it anyway - it is just a matter of time.

 

"Are you gonna be a new father, Junmyeon? I never knew you had a lover." Minseok asks casually while chewing on his bread. "I would ask you too, Jongin, but I really doubt it."

 

Jongin smiles dryly in the mirror before it falls, and it does not take a genius to deduce things when even his manager has no clever rebuts to maintain the previously non-suspicions, too speechless to form a coherent sentence.

 

Minseok looks between the two, digesting the thick awkward air, and gapes at Jongin. His half eaten melon bread falls on the floor with a muted whoomph, followed by a tiny: "Well, ."

 

-

 

Minseok knowing about it is not the biggest problem for Jongin right now. He actually trusts his own makeup artist not to blab about it to anyone. Minseok is kind enough not to bombard Jongin with questions about it, yet, but that could perhaps be due to the shock not fully settling in yet. After figuring out, on his own, about Jongin's situation, Minseok calmly picked up the fallen bread, tossed it into the nearest bin, and announced very eerily calmly that he would go out to buy a new one. 

 

"That was not on me," Jongin says as soon as Minseok left the room.

 

"Well, no kidding?" Junmyeon hisses, hysterical. "There goes my managerial job?"

 

"You're not gonna get fired, Junmyeon. It's just Minseok, not any of my dancer friends."

 

When Minseok returns, Jongin and Junmyeon has gone quiet again. Jongin watches as his makeup artist tears open the new bread and starts munching on it, brows furrowing as if deep in thought.

 

"I really thought it was Sehun." Minseok starts.

 

"You weren't the only one." Jongin retorts, getting a comb from Minseok's bag to part his hair neatly, before proceeding with using his hand to give it some volume. Minseok slaps his hand away for ruining the style.

 

Junmyeon scratches under his neck. "Honestly, I'm surprised you didn't think we were even talking about dogs..."

 

"Well, I would have if I didn't already know Jongin has dogs," Minseok says, before appraising Jongin. "You seem calm."

 

Jongin places the comb on the desk, shrugging weakly. "Yeah... long story." Pretty damn long.

 

"Does this mean you'll retire?"

 

The idol again shrugs. "My contract isn't over yet, and even so, I'm not looking to retire?"

 

Minseok hums, his face looks like he has more to ask, and he sure does not refrain from it. "I can't imagine you being a dad."

 

"Well gee thanks I guess."

 

"Was there a wedding? Or will there be one?" Minseok throws the question out in the open, and the room falls once again into a heavy silence.

 

Will there actually be one? Jongin takes a moment to reflect. Will he even have the courage to ask the bomb question to Kyungsoo? But more importantly, will Kyungsoo say... yes? What will Kyungsoo think? His mother is still waiting, and is even already expecting Kyungsoo would... agree to the marriage. It would only be natural for them to wed in his parents' and the public's eyes, considering the situation they both got themselves in and  the country they live in.

 

"I certainly hope I could answer that, Minseok," Jongin finally says. "It's pretty blurry for now."

 

Minseok nods in solemn understanding. "I might have crossed the line there so, sorry for that."

 

Jongin tells him it's nothing, and announces that he will be having a cigarette break for a bit before the interview starts.

 

-

 

A Mercedes Benz jeep parks itself in a reserved spot for the Director of LOEY, and afterwards the door opens to reveal the flashy long-legged self-proclaimed successful young owner of a beauty business. His previous silver hair is now bleached into pastel pink, and the only thing that hasn't changed is the unruly state of his hair and the alarmingly ruined strands but not that Chanyeol plans on dyeing his hair back to black anytime soon (although he knows he should).

 

Taking a big bite out of his protein bar, Chanyeol locks his car and confidently strides down the walkway. He has a red knitted designer sweater donned, with his coat draped over his shoulders, empty sleeves flapping in the wind, in what he believes is 'in' - gotta stick with the trends. Picking out clothes for the day is not an easy task for the young entrepreneur he has to consult a freelance stylist for it. 

 

Right before entering the salon, he sees a flash of something peculiar on this fine Monday morning. This... peculiarity is not very skilled in executing his job, poorly hidden in the bushes that lines the walkway like a sore thumb. The man is probably a head shorter than himself, looks around at least thirty years old, and has a bloated belly like an old man. He appears unkempt too.

 

Chanyeol has had his own number of complaints from either the clients or his own staffs regarding the sighting of journalists or stalker fans around the area, taking into account the salon's popularity even among the local celebrities. This is not to say he likes dealing with them.

 

He isn't much in a hurry himself for the day, with his agenda consisting of most paperwork that can be done in his office itself. Conferences and roadshows are not until the end of the week. 

 

He is just about to approach the strange middle-aged man but strangely enough he fails to do it in a discreet manner and this leads to the man running away as soon as he spots Chanyeol. 

 

With his tattooed hand awkwardly hanging in the air, Chanyeol tilts his head confusedly. "I'm not a scary man..." He just wanted to advise against stalking his clients here.

 

As he enters the salon and returns the greetings from his own staffs, he goes to Bora at the reception counter.

 

"Any interesting client today?"

 

Bora shrugs, sipping on her morning coffee as she checks on the planner for today, scanning the names of the clients as well as the staffs in charge of their sessions. "Nope."

 

Chanyeol raises a curious brow, tapping his fingers against the surface of the reception desk. "No celebrities?"

 

"No... Why, are we supposed to expect someone?" Bora asks.

 

Chanyeol resolves into a reassuring smile. "Nah. Just wondering. Oh, heads-up, the stocks that are meant to arrive today is postponed to tomorrow afternoon." He informs Bora before walking off towards his office, again returning greetings from his staffs who are currently providing service to their current clients.

 

No celebrities... Then whom was the photographer just now after?

 

"Good morning, Chanyeol," One of the staffs' voices particularly stand out to him, and Chanyeol turns his head to the only pregnant male staff he has in this branch. ...Right.

 

Kyungsoo immediately returns to pasting dye on his client's hair, engaged in a friendly conversation with her. Chanyeol does not realize he has stopped in his tracks until Momo questions him.

 

"Is something wrong, sir?"

 

Chanyeol shakes it off and says nothing to Momo as he heads up the stairs, wondering to himself.

 

-

 

In the office, Chanyeol's iMac screen overlooks his work mailbox, whilst the owner himself is perched on his desk scrolling through instagram leisurely. 

 

"Good morning, sir!" Sana greets after receiving an okay to open the door. "I brought your usual coffee. Black."

 

"Thanks," Chanyeol gets off the desk and lets Sana put the freshly brewed cup of coffee on top of the desk. Just as Sana is about to leave for her next work, Chanyeol stops her. "Sana."

 

"Yes, sir?"

 

"Well... I might have fallen behind in social media these days what with all my work and stuffs..." Chanyeol begins, waving his phone in the air. "But how famous is Kyungsoo as a social media influencer?"

 

"Huh?" Sana looks genuinely surprised, her head tilted.

 

Chanyeol maintains his polite smile. "...Well?"

 

"No, sir, it's just that, I don't think he was even aiming to be a social media influencer," Sana voices out her honest thoughts. "His IG posts don't hint on marketing partnerships or anything, so I thought that he must have gained a following base from his work as Sehun's former makeup artist. You know... like how some people gain attention as being related to celebrities and stuffs."

 

Chanyeol is definitely aware of that, so he wonders just how known Kyungsoo is for his own staffs to have recognized him on his first day here, and for some photographer to have possibly stalked him all the way to his workplace. "Could you share me his account, maybe?"

 

He hands over his phone to Sana for her to type up the account name on the instagram search bar, and thanks her for it. 

 

"Oh dear... is he in trouble?" Sana asks out of concern.

 

"It's nothing for you to worry about," Chanyeol smiles reassuringly before dismissing her for her work. When he returns to his phone, he is taken by surprise at Kyungsoo's follower count.

 

"To have nearly 40k followers and not make something out of it..." Chanyeol tsks, in disappointment, seeing it a waste of audience for potential brand marketing. Though business talk aside, Chanyeol understands why Kyungsoo has an audience at all. In the eyes of many, Kyungsoo has a conventional beauty to his looks, and couple that with being affiliated to a well-known idol Oh Sehun, it doesn't sound implausible to maintain that attention and follower base.

 

He briskly scrolls down the posts, unsurprised by the many makeup tutorials, subconsciously counting the missed opportunities of product placements for every post user @d_kyngsu uploads. Of course, there are more personal life uploads than work scope related uploads, and Kyungsoo seems to be doing a good job of not oversharing his private life, including his own pregnancy and where he lives.

 

Chanyeol scrolls back up and is about to return to the main timeline until a particular post catches his attention. He taps on the post, and it is mostly an innocent post of Kyungsoo recording his supposedly pet cat playing with a string toy, but the reason Chanyeol attended to that post at all is because of Kyungsoo wearing the complementary white tee with the brand name LOEY smack dab in the middle of it, with the material stretching around his pregnant belly, and it only lasts for about 2 seconds but somehow became the thumbnail. Although Chanyeol is supposed to feel flattered for the possibly unintentional, free endorsing, there is also the conjecture of how the stalker he recently encountered knew of Kyungsoo's whereabouts.

 

Ah, how troubling... First, that incident where Kim Kai barged into the salon without an appointment, and now possibly this stalking matter. His old pal Jongdae has truly brought to him a staff with 'special circumstances' indeed.

 

-

 

There is no telling if his filming schedule in Japan could get extended or not. His originally two weeks filming could be extended if the director wanted to re-shoot some scenes there, despite his scenes in Japan that are expected to make into the final cut is only about less than twenty minutes long. His filming in Japan would then be moved to Paris, and it will be more time-consuming to make return trips to Seoul.

 

He hardly has music related schedules for now, allowing him more time to memorize his script and practise his role better. Despite not given a tour yet this year (not that he places high hopes in that, by the way), he still goes for dance practices on his own volition.

 

Jongin's day today was spent in stunt classes in a stunt school, followed by acting lessons back in his agency building. He still makes time for the gym, under stricter guidance by his fitness tutor for his desire to look his fittest for the action-packed film so has lesser things to be disappointed about once filming wraps up, although ideally he would prefer if there were little to no disappointments at all. His flight to Japan is tomorrow, and with his time in Seoul cutting short, this ultimately means his time with Kyungsoo is reduced.

 

When Junmyeon finally drops him off in front of Kyungsoo's residence building, he thanks his manager and grabs his duffle bag from the backseat. Junmyeon makes him promise to finish packing for Japan last night and  to be ready by 7 in the morning tomorrow for their flight if Jongin wanted so much to stay the night at Kyungsoo's tonight. He's a difficult idol after all.

 

He thinks he hears the noise of a camera shutter once, right as he's about to step inside the building. Looking over his shoulder, he finds nothing out of the ordinary, and so he shrugs it off and be on his way.

 

-

 

Jongin presses the doorbell once, and there is no answer. He rings twice, and still no answer.

 

Could it be that he's bathing...? He knows the passcode, should he just let himself in? His guilty conscience tells him not to... 

 

He turns to his phone next, dialling Kyungsoo up, but that too goes unanswered. He figured that's enough reason for him to let himself in, growing worried now should something happen to Kyungsoo in his absence.

 

Pressing the six digits and being granted access, Jongin walks in with his stuffs, and is greeted by none other than the orange-eyed black-furred feline. 

 

"Winter," He greets, taking off his sneakers while simultaneously noting that Kyungsoo's shoes are there, not that he is sure the elder male would wear some pair else. "Where's Kyungsoo?" He asks despite knowing he would not get a verbal response from the cat. It would be creepier if he did.

 

Dropping his duffel bag on the floor, he calls out for Kyungsoo while looking over the living room before going to the kitchen. Still no Kyungsoo, but the sink looks wet, indicating recent use.

 

Aiming for the master bedroom next, he is just about to turn the doorknob before it turns itself and Jongin is first met with the thick material of a particular comforter but Jongin has no time to brace himself as he collides with the person who's carrying it and it causes him to tumble--

 

.

 

He's holding tight.

 

.

 

"Jongin?" 

 

The voice prompts Jongin to finally discern the view before him, of Kyungsoo whose arm is held on tight by Jongin's vice grip. Kyungsoo's legs... they're still standing. 

 

"..." Jongin breathes out, his grip on Kyungsoo's arm trembling. "I almost didn't catch you..."

 

Kyungsoo doesn't seem to register the danger that he could have been in, but instead smiles in delight at the sight of the idol. "You're early--" 

 

"Why didn't you pick up my calls?"

 

Kyungsoo startles. "It- It must have been on silent mode..."

 

Jongin finally releases the grip, and his own legs fail him as he crouches, thinking back about how Kyungsoo could have fallen on his bum and risk getting a miscar- he doesn't even want to think of it... He sighs into his hands.

 

"Are we- Are we having a f-fight?"

 

At the sob, Jongin quickly returns to standing. , he didn't intend to make Kyungsoo cry. "No, we're not. We're not having a fight. Hey, look at me," Jongin cups Kyungsoo's face and tilts it up, meeting eyes with the now glassy looking eyes. "You almost fell. That scared the out of me, that's it."

 

"Really?" Kyungsoo blinks up at him. 

 

"Really." Good, Kyungsoo's not crying. Seems like the pregnancy has made Kyungsoo extra emotionally delicate. Jongin steals a peck from him before releasing him, looking at the fallen comforter and sheets. "What were you even doing?"

 

"Ah... since you're staying over, I decided to change the sheets and wash the old ones..." Kyungsoo bends down to pick them up but Jongin easily beats him to it and you'd think the idol would get a simple 'thank you' for it but no, Kyungsoo blushes furiously and insists on carrying them himself.

 

"What's the big deal?"

 

Kyungsoo purses his lips together. "Those are the dirty ones..."

 

"...And?"

 

Jongin watches as the pregnant male hides his face in his hands now. "Well, what if they stink?"

 

Well, should Jongin let him know that the sheets don't stink at all, or that Kyungsoo smells particularly nice today that he doesn't notice how the sheets smell? He finds either options creepy and therefore settles to let it hang in the air. "Where should I take these to?"

 

"They don't stink?"

 

"Your laundry room is on the other side, right?" Jongin guesses, walking down the mini hallway to reach the other room. He can hear Kyungsoo trailing behind him.

 

"Are you sure they don't stink?"

 

"Here it is," Jongin drops the sheets beside the washer. 

 

"So they did stink..." Kyungsoo mumbles into his hands ashamedly.

 

Jongin resists a teasing smile as he drags Kyungsoo out of the room. "For the record, they don't. Don't I stink more?" He sees Kyungsoo look up from his hands, shaking his head no cutely. "You're too kind. I came directly from the gym, you know."

 

-

 

"Is there something on my face?" Kyungsoo rubs at his cheek curiously and checks the pads of his fingers.

 

After dinner finds them both on the couch, watching the television together. Jongin turns away, pretending to pay attention to the television. He has been wanting to ask this for some time, but has not been sure how to bring it up. "When I... came onto you that night," He starts, his voice hushed. He is plenty aware of how hesitant he is to bring up about this, but there is a need to know. "Did you say no?"

 

It seems the lack of details in Jongin's question renders Kyungsoo a little lost about what is being talked about, and when it finally does sink in, Kyungsoo's eyes grow big and his mouth leaves a small 'oh' of realization. "In Hawaii, right...? N-No, I didn't say no..."

 

Jongin appears skeptical. "You can tell me the truth."

 

"No, I promise you I'm telling the truth..." Kyungsoo explains himself. "Baekhyun had asked me the same question and I told him the same thing too."

 

"What did you tell him?" Jongin probes, and belatedly realizes he might have crossed the line so he then adds: "If you don't mind telling me..."

 

Kyungsoo does not look all too willing to talk about it, and Jongin is ready to stop him but then Kyungsoo opens his mouth. "I told him that I... I let you. I let you take me that night. I had injuries and he was worried about that."

 

"You had injuries?" 

 

"But I told him it was because you were drunk and... not the most mindful."

 

Jongin knows he ed up big time that night, but to know he even inflicted injuries on Kyungsoo...  biggest of the year there.

 

"M-Maybe I shouldn't have told you this..." Kyungsoo later adds, his voice small.

 

"What sort of injuries?" Jongin quietly asks.

 

Kyungsoo flushes, averting his gaze. "Just... this and that..."

 

"I think I deserve to know, I'm mostly responsible for it." Jongin asserts himself.

 

Kyungsoo's neck is so pink. "Fi...Fiss- Fissure..." He can not further go on and simply hides his face in his hands.

 

"You had fissure down there?" While Kyungsoo is embarrassingly mortified for saying it, Jongin looks absolutely infuriated by his own actions. He wanted to ask how severe it was and if Kyungsoo needed surgery for it but is interrupted by Kyungsoo himself.

 

"Can we please end it here...?" The beautician's voice muffles into his palms.

 

Jongin sighs, wondering if Kyungsoo were not telling him more. He seems to trust Baekhyun more than he trusts Jongin, but then again, Baekhyun has  known Kyungsoo longer than Jongin does, so that's fair. 

 

"Have you showered?" He asks, changing the topic at Kyungsoo's request. Kyungsoo looks confused, and answers a 'yes'. Jongin deflates. "Oh... Well, would you maybe want to just soak with me? For a bit?"

 

-

 

It's not like Jongin has not had plans of stepping up the next level of their relationship - he has the intents, but if it should happen, then it should happen organically. So he has no complaints when Kyungsoo said he didn't want to be fully in the tub with him. No big deal.

 

So now he has a clothed Kyungsoo whose back is to Jongin's bare chest- not entirely... Well, not at all, actually, and Jongin is fine with that, even when he has to resist the urge to pull Kyungsoo into a backhug and stay that way for the entire bath session. Yeah, it's just like soaking in a pool.

 

"I'll be leaving for Japan for a couple weeks." Jongin says, his arms resting on the sides of the tub. "Not all the time, but when I do make trips back here it'll be for work and then I'll have to immediately return there."

 

"Mm." Kyungsoo listens patiently.

 

"It will probably be hard to make time for you."

 

"You can call." Kyungsoo cups some warm water into his hands, letting it leak through the spaces between his fingers. "If there was one thing I hated doing for you, it would be interfering with your work. I don't want to--"

 

"Pull me down," Jongin finishes the sentence, reminded of the same words Kyungsoo had told him once. "I don't think you've realized how I was the one who had pulled you down instead. You... had to quit your previous job because of the pregnancy."

 

Kyungsoo leans forward and cups some water onto his own face. "In that alternative version of my life, I would also not have my own kin." He says, and then twists his torso a little and crane his neck to turn to Jongin behind him, water rolling down his cheeks and part of his bangs wet. "I will not let you regret crossing paths with me."

 

Jongin smiles a little. "You sound so sure."

 

"I just," Kyungsoo turns back, and tries to pull his knees together, but with the bump in the way, he gives up and hunches his shoulders instead. "Don't like dwelling. I dwelled enough."

 

Jongin kind of wants to really hug Kyungsoo right now, but would that freak him out? He has hugged him for several times but not when they're both... wet... in a tub... And Kyungsoo seems to have tolerated by just agreeing with Jongin about joining in the tub with him, so perhaps a wet backhug is pushing it a bit? Now that they have started dating, where do they draw the line? Though frankly speaking, the order in this relationship has already been messed up from the start.

 

From Jongin's view, he can tell Kyungsoo is heating up by the colour of his ears - they pink so easily. His nape has also started colouring a little, stopped by the neckline of his oversized white tee, now soaked to the shoulders. Reflecting against the ceramic tiles of the bathroom are the sounds of water droplets that Jongin can't pinpoint where it's from, but he sure can see some dripping from the tips of Kyungsoo's hair, down to the clear, now nearly lukewarm water in the tub. With the water so clear, Kyungsoo's bare legs do not go unnoticed by Jongin's eyes, closed together while flanked by those much longer ones of Jongin's. Does he shave? He must have shaved, or waxed, because they look smooth compared to Jongin's hairy ones-

 

...I must have been staring, haven't I?

 

Jongin's thought is confirmed when Kyungsoo himself has looked over his shoulder. "You've gone quiet..." And god did his cheeks look rosy. 

 

Jongin leans closer to him. "Kiss me."

 

The invitation no longer troubles Kyungsoo into a stammering mess, although the blushing persists. Still, Jongin is flattered to see Kyungsoo initiating it this time by placing a wet, warm hand on the idol's jaw and puckers up, even if it was by his own encouragement.

 

In the middle of the kiss, Jongin drops his own hands to Kyungsoo's upper arms to squeeze them. The touch submerges and dips within the water so Jongin can at Kyungsoo's sides, and then lower, not getting enough of Kyungsoo by just kissing. He wants more.

 

Jongin's hands could not go far, however, as Kyungsoo has pulled away from the kiss to lean away from the idol's chest, flushed, breathless. He has his arms wrapped around himself. "I- I'm not sure about being intimate... with how... pregnant I am."

 

Jongin's pupils are already blown, and he looks out of it. "I wouldn't mind."

 

"What...?" Kyungsoo looks over his shoulder once again, his arms still hugging himself, face flushed. "Well- I would."

 

"I can be careful." Jongin takes ahold of Kyungsoo's elbow, trying to coax him out of it.

 

"It's- It's not about the twins, it's more of how... unattractive I feel at the moment." Kyungsoo's head lowers. "I'm sorry."

 

The water ripples as Kyungsoo moves to get out of the tub, and Jongin holds Kyungsoo's arm tight to give support for him as he carefully looks out for the pregnant male, and only lets go once Kyungsoo has both his feet on the tiled floor.

 

He silently watches as Kyungsoo gets his robe, leaving the bathroom to Jongin alone. In the tub, Jongin sees no point of soaking any longer, and so he pulls the plug.

 

-

 

As Kyungsoo does his nightly skincare, he finds himself staring longer at his reflection in the dresser mirror, and then down at his round belly. On any other day prior to his pregnancy, he wouldn't have minded being touched intimately. He just does not feel y and desirable these days. 

 

"Sorry if I pushed you," He hears Jongin apologize behind him, a towel draped around his neck, and wet hair still dripping and damping the top of his shirt. The idol does not appear confident for some reason. 

 

Kyungsoo smiles apologetically through the mirror. "You didn't." Thinking he has finished with his skincare, he rises from the stool and approaches Jongin. Wordlessly, Kyungsoo takes the towel from around Jongin's neck to drape it on the top of the idol's head, and proceeds to rub it against his hair.

 

Even with the towel obscuring the upper half of Jongin's face, Kyungsoo can see it. Jongin is biting at his lower lip in frustration. The pride of an idol, wavered, in his hands. Like shaking a wall, but not exactly breaking it. It was the same when Kyungsoo refused to kiss him back when Kyungsoo asked him if they were dating, weeks ago.

 

Towel drying Jongin's hair despite the height differences where Kyungsoo needs to strain his shoulders just a bit, Kyungsoo asks quietly. "What's on your mind?"

 

"...I wanted to bring you to Japan with me."

 

Kyungsoo squeaks in surprise, retracting his hands from the towel now hanging the side of Jongin's head lop-sidedly. "Me?"

 

Jongin looks away, pulling the towel down and clenching his fists, and if Kyungsoo pays the slightest attention he would have noticed the slight blush on the idol's cheeks. "I just hate how we're already this close and now my job forces us apart."

 

Kyungsoo does not have the right words to say at the moment, too embarrassed. "It's- It's just for a couple of weeks like you said..."

 

That does not seem to make the idol feel better, as Jongin retorts with: "I know you would be mad if I made you take another leave from work again for me, so... I'm trying my best to not just get in the way with your work."

 

Jongin... wanted to be with him that much? And yet he casts aside (or at least tries to) his personal feelings for the sake of both of their jobs... 

 

"...your boss seems intimidating the last time I saw him and I don't wanna have him scold you just coz' I made you-- why are you laughing?"

 

In the midst of Jongin rambling, Kyungsoo catches himself chuckling too, a hand covering his mouth. He cannot explain this feeling - it just feels like he is on cloud nine, and for such a trivial thing, too. Is he allowed to feel this happy?

 

"I'm sorry," Kyungsoo says, his laughter gone leaving a content smile in its wake.

 

"You don't look it..." Jongin says, skeptical, but only partly as he also dons his own relieved grin. Charming, just how Kyungsoo always likes on him.

 

"Do your skincare, and let's get to bed," Kyungsoo says, and upon noticing the look of subtle excitement on Jongin's face, he bashfully adds: "Inn- Innocently."

 

-

 

"Thank you," Kyungsoo says as he grabs his hazelnut milk tea and finds a place to sit, which turns out to be a small table for two. Recently clocking out, he had a sudden crave for something rich and sugary, which led him to the nearest cafe. 

 

It used to be a company of one or more people when he went out for drinks like this, but seeing as he is not extremely close with any of his current coworkers, he finds it slightly uncomfortable to invite them out. Amber is the closest coworker in that salon, and even so he still doesn't think they're that close for Kyungsoo to want to hang out with her.

 

While waiting for the cafe worker to heat up the chocolate muffin he ordered, he settles into a seat and sips on his milk tea, bringing his phone out to check for any notifications while his other hand rests on the lower of his belly by force of habit.

 

Jongin has left for Japan this morning, leaving Kyungsoo goodbye with a kiss on his cheek while Kyungsoo was dazed sitting on the edge of the bed, and a gentle pat on Kyungsoo's bump - the twin boys. The idol did not even have time to sit down for breakfast with Kyungsoo.

 

"Chocolate muffin, sir," A waitress comes by to slide a plate before him on the table and sets a cake fork down. Kyungsoo thanks her and immediately digs in, uncaring that it would spoil his dinner later.

 

He looks around the place and outside while eating, and halfway into finishing his muffin, he spots a rather familiar slender man entering the cafe, with a camera shoulder bag. And it does not take long for Kyungsoo to realize it's the reporter that once pretended to be his client - Mr. Yoo Yeonseok.

 

Kyungsoo drops his gaze to his lap, wondering what to do. He isn't particularly scared - he knows that information is what the reporter would want at most and the best thing to do to drive him away is to just offer silence, but he has also grown uncomfortable in the man's presence.

 

When he looks up again, he's taken by surprise when he finds his gaze meeting that very man's, and he's running short of options. Maybe he should make a run for it--

 

"You don't have to be afraid," He hears that familiar voice and decides that it's already too late. "I wasn't following you. This," He gestures at the place and then between them two. "Is pure coincidence."

 

Kyungsoo looks up warily. He does not completely feel at ease, as that could easily be a lie. 

 

"Alone?"

 

"Why do you want to know?" Kyungsoo retaliates.

 

The man smiles, and it isn't brought with it a similar slyness like when he went undercover as Kyungsoo's client at the salon. This time, Yeonseok's smile looks... clean. "Coz' I was wondering if this seat is open."

 

Kyungsoo has half a mind to shoo him away - well, either that or abandoning his half eaten muffin and flee out of the cafe himself. But then he figures this man can't be physically dangerous for him to deny a seat, and he doesn't look info-hungry this time. Kyungsoo lets him have the seat, but does not yet plan to wholly accept this man as his company.

 

"It seems to have grown bigger from the last time I saw you," Yeonseok refers to presumably the child - or the size of Kyungsoo's belly. It doesn't matter.

 

"You said you lived close?" Kyungsoo asks instead, wanting to know why the man is there if he wasn't following Kyungsoo.

 

"That, I did," Yeonseok takes a sip of his coffee, and he sure takes his time even in the presence of someone he barely knows - or maybe he has known Kyungsoo enough from his time as a former journalist, having sought out information in a foul way.

 

Kyungsoo forked a bit of the muffin into his mouth, and he is supposed to feel happy about eating after a long day at work, but he is neither happy nor upset right now. 

 

"I lost my previous job. That's why you don't have to- no, that's why I told you not to be afraid of me, but I can't control how you feel around me so," The ex-paparazzi declares, adding some creamer to his coffee and stirring it, watching it swirl before taking another sip. Kyungsoo looks up at him, mostly confused of how to feel for this stranger.

 

"I- I'm sorry." An apology seems just like a conditioned response of his at this point, especially in the face of confusing situations, like now.

 

"Why would you be?" Yeonseok chuckles, putting down his coffee. "I know I've done nothing but brought you stress from my previous job."

 

Kyungsoo eyes his milk tea, his thumb wiping the condensation off and dabbing it at his napkin. A tinker.

 

"What, you're not gonna admit it? Docile, aren't you?"

 

"That's not it..." Kyungsoo responds, meek. "I just don't know what to say."

 

"I can't say I didn't enjoy my previous job," Yeonseok suddenly begins. "There's something gratifying about capturing moments into a photograph; even if it meant scandalous things. I enjoyed it a lot more than I did sitting for an office desk job. I regretted nothing; but I am sorry for... having disrupted your peace."

 

Kyungsoo is not sure why Yeonseok is telling him all this, but nevertheless he sits there patiently and listens. He isn't sure about accepting the apology for now, though. He feels like he should have a specific animosity, or at least, reservation for the ex-paparazzi who used to somewhat harass him for information, but he harbors no such feelings.

 

"You know," Yeonseok leans back in his seat, eyeing Kyungsoo attentively. "I wasn't the only one hot on your tail since your... pregnancy. It's not hard to obtain location info from your IG posts. You ought to be careful - just a piece of advice."

 

Kyungsoo brings in a forkful of muffin into his mouth, chewing slowly. "This coming from my former stalker is a bit..."

 

Yeonseok chuckles. "I can't even retaliate to that." He puts his coffee down and looks for something from his coat pockets, and once found, he slides it in front of Kyungsoo before standing up. It seems to be a business card.

 

Kyungsoo, puzzled, eyes the card and picks it up. "What's this?"

 

Yeonseok smiles. "A token of my sincerest apology, and best wishes to you both." He then adds: "Ah, only if you're comfortable with me around."

 

Wondering why a token of apology and good luck is in the form of a name card, Kyungsoo does not have the chance to ask further as Yeonseok announces his ride has arrived and has therefore seen himself off, wishing Kyungsoo to take care. By 'both', he is not sure what Yeonseok meant by it. But thinking back, since Yeonseok was a paparazzi, he must have known about his relationship with Jongin, and was therefore most probably referring to both Kyungsoo and Jongin.

 

Currently alone as he should be, Kyungsoo flips the business card to properly read:

 

S.C.A Company

YOO YEONSEOK

Wedding Photographer

010-483xxxx

[email protected]

 

-

 

Jongin lets out a sneeze, taking the offered tissue by Junmyeon miserably. It is colder here in Tokyo. "What's with the delay?" 

 

"They're having trouble making sure the road stays blocked for the filming. Some bike riders are stubborn, it seems." Junmyeon says, gripping on the hot pack and offering one for Jongin to which the idol also takes gratefully.

 

"They're on bikes, what's the big deal about looking for other routes?"

 

"Beats me."

 

Jongin goes over his script again, verbally practicing his lines and controlling his voice tones to his will, getting into character. It has been nearly a week of him here, but filming keeps getting disrupted either by technical difficulties or the weather. Even though it means more rest time for him, it also means longer time spent here and Jongin wants to minimize his time here as much as possible. He practices a lot so they would do fewer takes for his scenes.

 

"I'm gonna excuse myself to the washroom," Jongin informs before taking off to a nearby shop to borrow their restroom, passing by his co-actor Ju Jihoon on his way who flashes him a friendly smile and Jongin returning the gesture. They don't talk much, not that Jongin is often close with his co-actors anyway. He figures now that his personality must be rotten enough and that word spreads in the showbiz and causes some celebrities to distance themselves from him, but he cannot remember ever wronging anyone he encounters. He's just pretty much aloof in person, and probably has troubles to connect with people.

 

Which is probably why Kyungsoo's special.

 

After the toilet break, he enters a coffee shop, in need of ingesting something warm. He buys himself a latte, and after some thought he also orders fifteen more cups of latte and another fifteen of hot chocolate and told the worker there to distribute them to the filming staffs. It will probably be done by the time Jongin finishes recording one scene later.

 

By the time he returns to the filming site, the camera crew have started setting up their cameras, so Jongin hands over his own latte to Junmyeon and removes his coat. Minseok immediately attends to him to fix his hair and makeup while Jongin absentmindedly looks around at the stores by the streets. The act has him landing his gaze on a particular jewellery shop - pristine and expensive looking. Exiting the shop is a pair of doting couple laughing with each other.

 

"Actors, please be on standby!"

 

Jongin briskly enters the scene location at the instruction of the film director, rehearsing his lines once more while unconsciously circling his left ring finger.