A little boy. I’m having a little boy. We’re having a little boy. A healthy little boy – there wasn’t any abnormalities that showed up on the ultrasound. The technician says that my baby is of average size and he seems like he will be okay.

Curled up in a pile of blankets on my bed, I couldn’t help but look at the photos from the ultrasound again. A small smile found it’s way onto my face – the anxiety I felt before washed away. Baby is healthy right now – I’ve just got to remember to continue taking my vitamins and eating my three meals a day.

On the corner of the photos it reads
‘Mother: Lee Kyung Mi. Baby Hwang.’

It’s crazy to think that this is where my life ended up. Married at a young age. Divorced at a young age. And now pregnant with her ex-husband’s baby. Here’s the crazier thing – I’m okay with it. Complete acceptance of that is all I needed – maybe I haven’t lived the life I was supposedly suppose to live but this life right now, it’s not too bad.

Will this baby take Minhyun’s last name? Or will he take mine. Hyphenated last names don’t exist over here. In a normal case the baby would follow his father and take the last name but is it a normal case? Not really. I guess that’s something that can be discussed closer to date.

Knock. Knock.

‘Kyung Mi! Open the Door please!’ Se Jeong’s feminine voice sang through the door.

Rolling out of my self-created burrito of blankets, I moved slowly to the door cautiously. It sounds like Se Jeong has too much energy today and might just bounce right into me or something.

‘You walk extremely slow,’ she puffed when I finally opened the door for her.

‘And you have way too much energy,’ I observed as I offered her drinks and snacks to which she declined.

‘Sorry,’ she laughed, ‘I’ve drank 4 cups of coffee this morning. I had a round trip flight today. I almost fell asleep while in the air.’ Even thought she had less international flights, it didn’t reduce the number of exhausting days though.

‘What do we do, Se Jeong?’ I sighed to her, referring to Mina moving to Japan and away from us. I know the flight isn’t that long to get there – its a mere two hours but with baby, I’m unsure if I’ll still be fit to fly.

‘We support her and her dreams. And we’ll watch her apartment for her,’ she said. That’s all we can do, we be good friends. Even if I want her here, I can’t stop her from achieving success. They say that your friends are the family that you choose for yourself and after harping on about what a family should be, I better follow my own advice.

‘She’s keeping her apartment?’ I asked with a raised brow. She’ll be spending most of her time in Tokyo and when she comes back to Seoul she could always just stay at Se Jeong’s or with her parents. There really isn’t much of a reason to keep her apartment.

‘Yeah, she said that she was on a wait list for that apartment for such a long time and she’s not willing to just give up that amazing place for nothing,’ she laughed, ‘I wish I could have that place but I just renewed my lease for at least another year.’

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‘Oh, I have something to show you,’ I said and scrambled into my room to gather the pictures for her to see.

‘This is your baby?’ She asked with her eyes enlarged and as round as the full moon.

‘Indeed it is, it’s my baby boy,’ I announced to her. She jumped onto her feet and held my hands in hers, forcing me to follow her jumping motion.

‘Congratulations!’ she shouted happily, ‘It’s a baby boy! It’s a baby Boy! It’s a baby boy!’ Her contagious smile spread it’s way to my own face. ‘I’m going to be the best aunty this child will ever see,’ she proudly declared before pulling me into a very tight embrace.

Se Jeong demanded that we celebrate the gender reveal with some red wine. Well, she celebrated with the alcoholic drink while I stuck to my camomile tea. I’m not sure if it really works but it’s been said to help with sleep. Not that I’m having any issues with sleep anymore, but it’s nice to have the reassurance.

Even after the Se Jeong left just before midnight, Daehwi had not returned home (home, as in my apartment and not the family house). He left this morning after breakfast telling me he had an errand to run. I’m worried about him – I don’t want him getting hurt or doing anything he might regret.

I took out my phone and dialled his number. Straight to voice mail though. Sighing, I left him a message. ‘Daehwi-ah, when you get home….. umm I’m not sure if you know that code but its four, seven, two, zero.’

Telling him to come home now wouldn’t have solved anything. We all have different ways to cope – we all need to find out own coping mechanism. What works for you may not work for the next person.

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Maybe I’ve been staring at the mirror for too long, maybe I’m just a little paranoid. But these clothes aren’t hiding much, I’ll need to start dressing much more baggy. The small baby bump is definitely there and prominent.

‘Are you okay, Kyung Mi?’

A waving hand appeared in front of my face, snapping me out of my stare onto the mirror. It’s really there – I’m not too sure I can avoid people’s questions anymore.

‘Oh, yeah,’ I jumped slightly, not expecting to be surprised. ‘Am I dressed okay?’ I asked, unsure if my outfit was appropriate. Black jeans, sneakers and a sweater – is it a little too casual?

‘Perfectly fine,’ he said before checking the time on his watch,’ Now let’s go before we run into traffic.’

‘Alright,’ I said, picking up my bag that was sitting on the kitchen bench. ‘Seriously, thanks for driving Minhyun. I definitely don’t think I could do the drive on my own,’ I said, whilst locking up my apartment.

‘Not a problem, plus we’re going to my parent’s house. I feel like I should be the one to get us there,’ he laughed as he ran his hand through his silky looking hair.

We’ve decided that we’re goin