Before

„I have to study, Jungkook.“ I said, terribly frustrated. We were sitting in the school library. It was almost empty and I sat on the ground, next to big pile of books, trying to find that one particular. Jungkook sat in front of me.

„I know, I know. Don't let my presence to interrupt you.” I gave him one annoyed look and continued with what I was doing. He was watching me… Every time I looked at him, he looked somewhere else. Like it wasn't so obvious.

“Stop! I can't concentrate.” I said.

“Me neither. Gosh, you're beautiful.” My pencil case landed right on his face.

“When did you became so… I don't know. Annoyingly sweet?!”

“When I met you.”

“I would throw that book at you… But it isn't mine and I don't have anything against that book so…” I tried to concentrate, but while constantly seeing his smiling face with my peripheral vision, it was mission impossible. “Give me 30 minutes. For 30 minutes, don't even come closer to this room. Go for a walk or something. Then I'm all yours.”

“All yours you said?” he asked, being more excited than I expected.

“Y-yes.” I said, not so sure about that anymore.

“30 minutes! Call!” He stood up, gave me one “longer-than-usual” kiss and got lost behind the corner.

He really kept his promise, so about 2 hours later, we found ourselves in his room, kissing.

“I love you, Yerim.” He said. “We can call it my 10th reason.”

“Oh really?” I laughed between a few short kisses he gave me. “Again, with your reasons.” I slowly helped him to get out of his T-shirt. “I love you too.” We were both smiling, fine with anything that should happen right now. Until his phone rang. He stopped, took it out of his pocket and looked at the screen.

“I'm sorry. I have to take it.” He left the room. I can't describe how humiliated I felt in that moment. Okay… That phone call was probably really important, but still. It's not more than 30 seconds I was kissing him and touching him on places, friends strictly don't.

He came back… Looked at me, run his fingers through his hair and then took his T-shirt from the floor. He just put it on, like nothing was happening before. Then, he came closer, gave me a short kiss and his play station.

“Do you want to play?” he asked. I wanted to say 'Yes. But not that thing.', but I was too humiliated to do that. Especially when I still saw my lipstick on his lips.

It was so awkward then. It took at least 1 hour, until I was able to communicate with him. Since then, situations like this repeated once in a while. And every time it happened again, I was more salty about it.

-----

So now, standing in front of his apartment while he is putting in a door code, I came to a big decision. I won't let it be just like that. There are only two options. We will sleep together, or talk about it and probably have an argument.

“Do you want to eat something?” he asked, heading straight into a kitchen.

“No… I already ate.” He took the water from the fridge and poured himself a cup.

“Water?”

“No… Thank you.” He tilted his head to the right and slowly examined the look on my face.

“Tonight, they released the last episode of Shingeki no kyojin. Do you want to watch it?” Cuddling in front of a TV is better than kissing after eating a bowl of ramyeon.

“Okay.”

He his laptop and probably tried to look it up. Meanwhile, I was coming up with scenarios in my head. Okay… So… What is the worst thing that can happen?

“Jungkook. I want to sleep with you.” I said, shyly, not able to look into his eyes. In that moment, he couldn’t stop his laugh. “Jungkook.” I repeated. He is still laughing, hitting the table with his hand.

“What?” he said somewhere in between. “You want to sleep with me?” It’s becoming really uncomfortable. “But I’m gay. You didn’t know?!” still laughing. “I’m dating you only to make Jin jealous.”

I shook my head, trying to get that thought o