After pacing in my little apartment for another few hours, I finally got the nerve and picked up the phone. Then I put it down again. I decided to send him a text instead, asking him to meet me by the alley where I met him. Where it started would be where it ended.

“So how have you been these days? Were you busy?” Seungri asked me when I met him. We started walking around like we always do.

“Um, I was on the job for a couple of nights.” I replied shortly.

“You went back to work there? I told you not to go, it’s too dangerous.” he said with worry written on his face.

I hoped that I was making the right decision.

“I’m sorry Seungri,” I stopped.

“Sorry for?”

“I can’t do this…we can’t be together.” I was only trying to protect him.

“What?”

“I’m sorry.” I lowered my head and tried to hide my face beneath my bangs.

“What are you saying Eun-Mi? After all we’ve been through? After all I’ve loved you? Why are you doing this? Do you really want to break my heart?” He started to raise his voice.

“I—” I turned away from him.

He spun me around toward him forcefully, and before I could even react, he had his lips pressed against mine. It almost made me give in and kiss him back, but I knew this would never work out. It’s better to end it before anyone gets hurt. I pushed him away.

“Everything was going so well! What’s the matter? Come on Eun-Mi. Stop joking! Let’s go.”

“Seungri! I’m not joking. We have to stop seeing each other.”

“What?!” Of course he still didn’t get it. No one does. Not even me.

“I’m not joking! We can’t be together! It’s for your own good!” I raised my voice too. A clean break was what I was aiming for, but why was he making this harder for me?

“What do you mean we can’t be together? I don’t see anything stopping us before! We still love each other so why are you doing this? For my own good? You think this is for my own good?” He shouted in disbelief.

“Ugh why are you making this so hard? Have you ever thought that I DON’T love you, and never did?” It broke my heart to say those words, but I had to protect him. But, I didn’t stop there. “Seungri, I think you’ve got it wrong. We weren’t even ‘together’ in the first place. Have I ever told you that I loved you?!”

It seemed like my plan worked. He looked shocked and stared at me with pain in his eyes. I took advantage of the silence and continued. “You’re not the one who’s lost everyone you loved. So please don’t try to contact me again. Goodbye Seungri.”

I slowly walked away, thinking that the sadness would finally hit soon, but I was actually kind of angry, at everything in my life that had gone wrong. I barely noticed when the tears started flowing down my face like an endless river.

I half expected him to follow me. No, I wanted him to follow me, and stop me from doing this. But he just continued to stand there looking shattered. Why was life so unfair? Why couldn’t I just live a normal life? Why did they all have to die?

I’m sorry Seungri. I can’t love you.

It's been a while, is everyone still alive? Keke cuz Bigbang sure is ALIVE. Thanks to all the subbies~