Joonmyeon had retired to Jongdae’s guest bedroom once more. He was still angry with his boyfriend but also missed Yixing tremendously. Every morning he had woken up empty, unhappy and distressed. Going to college with Jongdae felt weird, it wasn’t right. Despite feeling like this, he hadn’t called Yixing once, neither had Yixing called him. It was contradictory, but it annoyed him that Yixing didn’t contact him. On the meantime, the days had passed, and soon enough he will be getting engaged, and Yixing would perhaps be leaving.

Jongdae walked into Joonmyeon’s bedroom as he was finishing fixing his blue tie. He saw his cousin laying on the bed, hiding under the duvet. With firm steps, Jongdae approached the bed, tossed away the comforter and said, “Joonmyeon! Wake up! We have to leave in an hour.”

Joonmyeon frowned and his side, facing away from Jongdae. “Go away Jongdae,” he groaned.

A sigh was heard and footsteps that reverberated against the floor. “Guys! I give up. He’s impossible!” Jongdae whined.

Joonmyeon heard more people walking in, and someone muttering to Jongdae ‘You didn’t even try hard.’ But he was still facing away from the door. He felt the bed sink and someone turning him around. His eyes met Baekhyun’s, who was sitting next to him, and then Jongdae and Sehun, who were standing next to the bed.

“Joonmyeon! You can’t miss Yixing’s graduation,” Baekhyun ordered as he observed him sternly.

“Yes, I can,” Joonmyeon replied. “Now if you guys excuse me, I’m going to continue sleeping,” he said as he closed his eyes.

The three boys sighed.

“I know you're still mad at him, but if you don’t go, you’re going to regret it,” Baekhyun said.

Joonmyeon opened his eyes again. “But he doesn’t regret leaving me, does he?”

Baekhyun looked at him confused. “He hasn’t even left you yet! You don’t know what he has decided.”

“That’s the thing! He shouldn’t have to figure out anything. He should have chosen me!” Joonmyeon yelled. “So, of course, this equals as him picking his career.”

Sehun was tired of having this argument once again. Over the past week, they have tried to make Joonmyeon understand that Yixing hadn’t said anything about leaving and convince him to talk to Yixing. But Joonmyeon would always get this bratty attitude and refused to listen. Sehun had enough. “JOONMYEON STOP BEING AN ALMIGHTY PRIVILEGED SELFISH !” he shouted.

Everyone looked at him perplexed. It wasn’t everyday Sehun offended someone. Sure, he was sassy and blunt sometimes, but whenever he meant it, he would say it loudly and sincerely. This time he truly meant it.

“Sehun?” Joonmyeon asked quietly. Rather than feeling insulted Joonmyeon was puzzled.

Sehun sighed and rubbed his temples. “You’re an idiot. Don’t you understand that unlike us, Yixing wasn’t born with a silver spoon in his mouth.”

There was a brief silence until Joonmyeon spoke. “Of course I do. Why does it matter?” he asked because he knew it, but couldn’t see why Sehun would bring that up.

“Because! This means he feels thrilled to know that people have recognized him for his talent. It’s the fruit of his hard work. And well, getting a job wasn’t based on his surname or family influence. Nobody gave it to him. It was all on him,” Sehun explained.

“He feels conflicted because this means a lot to him, but so do you. And the fact that he doubted rather than simply going, means that he loves you more than his own dream,” Baekhyun added.

“And let’s not forget that your getting engaged in like two weeks dude! Of course, he would be hesitant. What happens if he stays, but you end up marrying Hye? Haven’t you thought about that?” Jongdae finished the trio’s lecturing.

Nothing of what his friend had said had crossed Joonmyeon’s mind. He had been so fed up with the fact that Yixing hadn’t chosen to stay with him, that he ignored all the factors involved. Yixing had the right to doubt, heck he had the right to go. Joonmyeon had witnessed Yixing’s dedication and commitment towards music during their teenage years. He should be aware that Yixing deserved this more than anyone else. His boyfriend was different from him, who could get anything he wanted because he was a Kim. And then how could he judge Yixing when he was about to get engaged? He had nothing to lose besides Yixing, but if Yixing stayed with him and he got married, Yixing would lose everything.

“I-I’ve been an idiot,” Joonmyeon admitted.

“Yes!” the three boys said in unison.

Even if Joonmyeon had realized things, he couldn’t help being selfish. “But I can’t let him go… We’ve been away for nine days, and it was hell. How am I going to survive a whole year?”

The one to talk was Sehun. “Yeah, you’ll probably cry every day. But can you live knowing that you crushed his dream in vain? Do you really want him to be miserable for YOUR sake?” he asked.

Hearing someone else point out the truth hurt. They were right, and Joonmyeon felt terrible. Yixing wasn’t being selfish, he was. It was all going to be Joonmyeon’s fault, and his boyfriend would be too kind to say otherwise. He was really a selfish prick who once again had hurt Yixing, once again had made him wait, once again had given him sleepless nights. Joonmyeon had broken his own promise of never hurting Yixing, and now he was planning on not being there for him on his graduation. It was laughable that he said he loved Yixing when he acted like this.

Joonmyeon jumped out of bed. “I have to get ready,” he said before bursting towards the shower.

“I’ll get you a suit!” Jongdae shouted and went to look after one in his closet.

“I’ll fix your shoes!” Beakhyun said as he walked out of the bedroom.

“Thank god he stopped being dumb,” Sehun muttered to himself.

Things with Joonmyeon were still unfixed, and even if it killed him, Yixing had not called him. He wanted to give him the space he had requested. At the same time, Yixing had reflected over his future. There was a risk that in case he stayed, things won’t end well. Joonmyeon might end up married, and what was he going to do later? Become his paramour? On the other hand, if he left he had a chance to develop vastly as a composer, maybe even get national recognition one day. But he won’t be with Joonmyeon. And being away from him for this short amount of time had been excruciating. He didn’t want to imagine what it would be like to be away for a year.

In the end, after much thought, he had finally decided what to do.

Yixing was sitting in the arena, surrounded by all his classmates and the rest of the students. His turn to receive his diploma would be soon, there were already calling the Ys. Rather than being thrilled or excited, he felt miserable. He had hoped that Joonmyeon would attend his graduation, and then he would tell him everything. But Joonmyeon hadn’t come, and that crushed his heart. No one was there for him.

“Yixing cheer up. You're next,” Luhan, who was sitting to his left, said. He had already gone upstairs and was holding his diploma.

Yixing glanced at Luhan sadly. “I don’t think I can Lu,” he answered. Everything was too messed up for him to feign happiness. His graduation photo would have to be him looking gloomy while shaking hands with the principal.

Luhan knew Yixing getting together with the Kim boy would only bring him despair. But this time he was too considerate to tell him ‘I told you so.’ Instead he hoped Yixing would go to Beijing and start anew. “It can be over soon Yixing,” Luhan tried to comfort his friend.

“ZHANG YIXING!” the host announced through the speakers.

The public clapped as Yixing walked to the stage. He was just about to go up the small stairs when he heard a familiar voice shouting his name. Rapidly Yixing turned around hoping to find the source. Thankfully, he heard it again and could see where it came from. It was Jongdae. Their gazes met, and Jongdae waved at him. Next to him was Baekhyun, who also moved his arms. Sehun was there as well, he smiled subtly and nodded. And then… Joonmyeon. His boyfriend had come. Joonmyeon saluted him with a big smile that made Yixing utterly happy. He raised his hand and waved back. Seeing Joonmyeon’s smile after such long time was recomforting.

Yixing, who was still looking at Joonmyeon, had completely forgotten what he was doing. The announcer had to call after him again, and the public laughed at his clumsiness. But Yixing couldn’t care less about being embarrassed, he was joyful. The picture didn’t turn out as bad as he expected.

As Joonmyeon saw Yixing standing there, he couldn’t help but feel guilty about almost missing the event. Sometimes he could be a huge idiot.

When the ceremony ended Yixing walked outside, hoping to see his friends and boyfriend. It was a maddening crowd of people that congratulated, hugged and cheered for the new graduates. After Yixing was far away from the multitude, he saw the four young men standing there. He walked over nervously. Even if Joonmyeon had been smiling, he could still be angry at him. So, once Yixing was standing in front of them, he didn’t know what to do.

There was an awkward silence in which none of the five men said or did anything.

Suddenly Joonmyeon embraced Yixing, as Yixing held his diploma tightly underneath their chests.

“Joonmyeon I’m-”

“Shhh… Let’s talk about it later Xing,” Joonmyeon whispered in the other’s ear. “Congratulations.”

Yixing moved his hands to hug Joonmyeon back, still holding the diploma. “Okay,” he replied.

Their embrace didn’t last long enough because Jongdae coughed to remind them of where they were. When Yixing was free, the three boys took turns to congratulate him, gave him a handshake and a hug. They were talking about going somewhere for lunch to celebrate when Luhan tapped Yixing’s shoulder from behind.

“Yixing, my mom asks if you-” said Luhan, but didn’t finish the sentence as his eyes wandered off to Sehun. Luhan’s jaw dropped slightly, and Sehun just flushed and looked at him shyly. Everyone around them smiled inwardly.

“Lu? I guess you remember the others from my birthday, but this is Sehun,” Yixing said as he introduced the dazed boy to Sehun.

“Oh yes, hi you all,” Luhan answered as he rapidly glanced at them. He stared back at Sehun. “Nice to meet you, I’m Luhan,” he said as he held out his hand towards Sehun.

After the peculiar introduction, Luhan asked Yixing if he was still joining his family to eat. Yixing excused himself and told him he was going to eat with Joonmyeon and the guys. Luhan seemed slightly concerned but decided to let it go. “Yixing, please remember what we’ve talked about and reconsider your decision,” Luhan said in Chinese before leaving.

Joonmyeon got nervous at the last words Luhan said. Yixing had made a choice.

In the afternoon, when the group had finished eating, Jongdae drove Joonmyeon and Yixing to his apartment. He told them they could use it to talk freely while he drove Baekhyun and Sehun home. They walked inside, took the elevator, opened the door, took off their shoes, and lastly sat in the living room. It was time to talk.

Joonmyeon took a deep breath and exhaled, he looked apologetic at Yixing. “Yixing, I’m sorry,” he began. “My stupidity and I seem to be inseparable. Sometimes I can be an immature idiot… I did it again, Yixing. I made you suffer once more.” He breathed one more time. “I’m sorry.”

Listening to Joonmyeon apologies calmed Yixing’s beating heart. He had been afraid he would still be angry at him, but that wasn’t the case. “I’m sorry as well-”

“No! Please don’t apologize,” Joonmyeon interrupted. “It’s all my fault. I didn’t even give you time to explain yourself. But I’m listening now. Yixing, what do you want to do?” he asked nervously.

Yixing thought about his final decision. Many would argue that it was foolish, extremely stupid of him to do so. However, love makes us commit disastrous mistakes. “Joonmyeon, I’m going to stay,” he said. “I’m going to decline the offer.”

It was curious how the human mind worked. Any other day, Joonmyeon would have jumped out of excitement to that answer. It was everything his spoiled self had wanted to hear. But it didn’t make him the slightest happy. Yixing had said ‘going to’ rather than ‘want to’ and Joonmyeon understood that Yixing was sacrificing his own goals for him, it felt wrong. It was embarrassing to know that his selfishness was going to be rewarded. “No, Yixing…” he said.

“What?”

“Go, you have to! I can’t let you stay for me!”

“But what about us? How will this work if I’m in China?” Yixing enquired dejectedly.

Joonmyeon considered what they would do until he saw the simple answer right before his eyes. Why didn’t he think about it before? It could have avoided them their fight. It was the solution to all their problems.

“I’m going with you.”

“What?” Yixing gasped. What was Joonmyeon thinking?

“I’ll go to China with you Xing. The semester ended two days ago, and I know Chinese, I can continue my studies over there,” Joonmyeon explained.

For as much as Yixing wanted to compel, this wasn’t prudent. “But what about your life? Your father? The family business? You're supposed to take over everything Joonmyeon,” he reprimanded.

“It doesn’t matter. Jongdae is just as capable as I am, he can take over. Honestly, I don’t care about my father, he’ll be okay. I’m done trying to please him. And you know neither Hye and I want to marry each other. This is the only way out Xing.”

It sounded reasonable, but it was so wrong. “I don’t know Myeon…”

“Don’t you want me to go with you?” Joonmyeon asked heartbrokenly. He couldn’t understand why Yixing was hesitant to accept. It was a great idea.

“I-I do! But I feel it won’t end well... Aren’t you afraid of the aftermath?”

“No, because I’ll have you by my side,” Joonmyeon assured as he held Yixing’s hand.

And then Yixing’s resolution faltered. It was crazy and most likely problematic, but it was their only chance. “All right… Let’s do it.”

Joonmyeon hugged his boyfriend joyfully. This was it. They were going to get their happy ending.

“But we must go tomorrow,” Joonmyeon said. “My father is outside the country for three days, it’s the perfect chance.”

Some hours later

It had been a tiresome journey. Mr. Kim hated taking flights and feeling jetlagged. Thankfully in a few years, Joonmyeon would take over everything, and he could retire in peace, winning the race he had started with his brother during their early years.

As he was laying in the hotel bed, trying to get some rest, his phone buzzed. It was his assistant.

“What is it Park?” he complained.

“I’m sorry to interrupt you sir, but I’ve just been informed that your son has requested to take out money from the bank. Most precisely his part of your wife’s inheritance.”

His eyes opened, and instantly he sat up. “What?!” he exclaimed.

“Yes, Mr. Joonmyeon might be an adult, but the bank was worried as to why he needed that huge amount of money.”

What the hell is that kid doing, he thought. “Did he say why?”

“No sir, but there is another thing. I’ve checked his last credit card transactions and, he bought two tickets to Beijing for tomorrow. They have no return date…” the assistant finished.

Had Joonmyeon gone insane? What in the world was he doing when he was getting engaged in a less than two weeks?

“Who’s going with him?”

“One second… It’s a-a Mr. Zhang Yixing,” Park responded.

Yixing? He knew Yixing was going to leave in January, but why was Joonmyeon following him? Could he have missed something? This was insane. He needed to go back to South Korea. Whatever they were planning didn’t sound good. “Park, book the next flight to Seoul immediately,” he ordered before hanging up.