*_*_*_*_*_*

After the door had closed Jiro finally looked up from his work.

“It should be this way,” Jiro told himself, “I should be like this toward her.”

It had been thirty minutes after Selina’s goodbye to him when his door suddenly flung open. He felt surprised at first until he saw Chun’s figure walk in.

“Have you seen Selina?” asked Chun.

He sounded as if he had been running around.

“She already left,” Jiro replied. “Isn’t she at your house?”

“I told her I was going to pick her up, but I didn’t see her outside at all. Are you sure she already left?” Chun asked.

Jiro stared back at Chun and suddenly jumped up from his chair. Chun followed Jiro around the building as they searched for her. They came across a few security guards, but no one had seen her. Feeling worn out from running around the large building Jiro turned to Chun.

“Maybe she should be there by now,” Jiro said turning to Chun.

Chun silently opened his phone and called his home phone, but no one picked up.

“She didn’t go back,” Chun replied. “What if something happened to her?”

Jiro watched as Chun dropped onto a chair feeling the same worry. Chun seemed worn out and tired from work, yet he still cared for Selina with all he had. Jiro glanced at the ground feeling a little bad that he had treated Selina that way. Maybe if he had been better toward her she wouldn’t have gone missing. Jiro stared back at Chun.

*_*_*_*_*_*

Selina sat silently. She and Ella seated on the opposite side of the other.

“Don’t feel awkward,” Ella said, “just treat me as a friend. We’ve already had a meal together before haven’t we?”

Selina nodded her head recalling having met at the cottage.

“I always have meals alone so whenever I can I get Jiro or Chun to eat with me,” Ella told, “but mostly Jiro since Chun refuses most of the time.”

“Oh…” Selina replied not sure how she was supposed to answer.

Chewing on her food diligently Ella asked, “It seems like Jiro really likes you a lot. The last time I ate with him he didn’t even pay attention to a thing I was saying at all.”

Ella smiled covering which Selina found cute.

“I think you two are really cute,” Ella commented.

“Haven’t Jiro always fancied you?” Selina questioned.

Ella gave a short laugh, “I think he’s gotten over that.”

“Then do you still like Chun?” Selina asked.

Ella became quiet for a moment giving Selina the feeling that she’d done something wrong.

Suddenly Ella smiled, “Well I was hoping we’d be able to talk things through when we met again at the cottage, but he seemed really upset for some reason.”

Selina could recall everything clearly.

“Did I tell you that was the first time the three of us had gotten together in 3 years?” Ella asked.

Selina shook her head. She knew nothing of it.

“Jiro only…” Selina began then looked at Ella shyly. “I’m not sure if I should say it…”

“It’s alright,” Ella told.

Biting her lower lip Selina began, “Jiro only spoke to me because he was really upset about Chun…that he broke up with you so you could be with Jiro. I mean Jiro didn’t want that to happen…well…it seemed like he still wanted you and Chun to be together…he only wanted to get you two back together. Maybe that’s why he did what he did at the cottage…maybe Chun was upset because he didn’t know any of it…because Jiro lied to us…”

Selina stopped and stared at her glass of water. It now seemed more like she was explaining things to herself. Had she gotten angry at Jiro for nothing? Why was she only realizing now, that Jiro had only wanted to try to fix things by coming up with lies he thought he’d made for the better of the situation?

Ella chuckled, “I know Jiro doesn’t mean to hurt any of us. I know he feels guilty, but you seemed a little confused back then too.”

“Huh?” Selina asked.

Ella smiled, “Never mind, it’s already all passed. I’m almost full, what about you?”

Selina nodded.

“Then I’ll give you a ride to your house,” Ella offered.

As they stepped outside of the restaurant Selina paused. Looking at Ella the only thing that she was conscious of was that she was Chun’s ex. She knew Chun better than anyone. Was Selina supposed to let Ella know that she was staying with Chun? Ella already believed that she was Jiro’s girlfriend so would it still make sense to say that she was staying at Chun’s place?

“Get in,” Ella called from the car.

Selina made her way toward the car.

“I think I’ll take a walk home,” Selina told.

“A walk? Girls aren’t supposed to be walking the street this late at night,” Ella told. “I’ll just give you a ride. I don’t mind.”

“But…” Selina replied.

Ella walked around the car to the passenger’s side and opened the door smiling at Selina waiting for her to get in. Not sure how to refuse her Selina did as she was told and got in. Selina watched as Ella walked around the car and into the driver’s seat. Without saying anything Ella had already begun to drive off.

*_*_*_*_*_*

“Selina….she’s doing a god job right?” Chun asked.

“Yea of course,” Jiro replied.

“No one’s picking on her or anything right?” Chun asked.

“You’re such a worrywart,” Jiro said lightly hitting Chun on the back of his head, “I help look after her too.”

Chun laughed and they were silent for a moment.

“You know my mother’s out of Taiwan right now right?” Chun asked.

“Oh really?” Jiro asked pretending as if he didn’t know. “For how long?”

“A few weeks,” Chun replied, “but I have a feeling it might take a longer time.”

“Why’s that?” Jiro asked.

“Business issues might get complicated over there and she might want to give me a little more time with Selina,” Chun told then laughed, “I think she wants a grandchild.”

Jiro laughed a little, but wasn’t able to go at it for long. He couldn’t imagine Selina with Chun in that kind of situation…he didn’t want to think of Selina being Chun’s wife as of the moment.

“I’ve told you right?” Chun asked. “I think I really like her right now even if I don’t know her so well. When I see her I feel full and happy, content and secure. Has she told you about her mother? I don’t want to see her sad again so I want to give her all that I can. Do you think I’m making her uncomfortable?”

“No,” Jiro quickly replied then pressed his lips together.

He also wanted to make Selina happy. He also wanted to grant her wishes. He also wanted to stay by her side, hug her, and keep her. But comparing his situation to Chun’s Chun seemed more suitable for the role of her husband. Chun’s mother loved Selina, but it’d be hard for Jiro’s father to accept her. As of the moment Jiro’s father would rather deal with becoming big in the business than have news of Jiro getting married get out. Selina wouldn’t receive the kind of warmth from Jiro’s family she would from Chun’s.

Jiro turned toward Chun and they smiled at each other.

*_*_*_*_*_*

Selina became surprised when Ella stopped in front of Chun’s house. She turned to Ella who smiled back.

“Jiro told me,” Ella told.

Selina didn’t say anything, she didn’t know what to say.

“Go in. Chun must be freaking out about your whereabouts by now,” Ella told.

“Thank you,” Selina said and got out.

She waved at Ella as she drove off and hoped that Ella didn’t think that she was too cold toward her. Selina took a breath and went inside.

The house was empty when Selina went in. She went into the kitchen and made tea, changed into comfortable clothes, and sat around for a bit. After sitting down for 10 minutes the door opened and Chun walked in. Selina stood up ready to say something about Ella to Chun, but before being able to Chun rushed over giving her a tight hug.

“I’m so relieved you’re ok!” Chun said. “I missed you when I wasn’t able to see you, but I feel so happy right now.”

Selina stood still in Chun’s embrace and wasn’t able to bring herself to hug him back. Thoughts about Ella and Jiro swam in her head. Why, when she was with Chun now, that she was always thinking about someone else? Chun let go of her and moved in for a kiss, but Selina moved her head back avoiding it.

“I…I think I forgot something. I’ll be back,” Selina replied and quickly headed out the front door.

Chun stood frozen. He felt something different emanating from Selina. Something about her seemed different, but he ignored it. Chun didn’t want to know what it was. He only wanted to spend some time alone with her. It was their second day alone and yet Selina wasn’t giving him the chance to show her his feelings.

Selina stopped by a lamp post in front of the house feeling the cool air. It felt stuffy all of a sudden. She didn’t feel comfortable. Pressing her lips together Selina walked forward.

*_*_*_*_*_*

Jiro sat dazed at his desk staring at the ground. His heart sank whenever he replayed Chun’s speech about Selina in his head. His love for her was so big. Selina had already confessed to Chun before so Jiro wouldn’t have the chance in the future. Jiro felt disappointed with himself and the way everything was. Before heaving a sigh the door opened and Selina poked her head in.

“I…I just wanted to stop by,” Selina replied.

Jiro looked up at her wanted to get up and give her a hug, but restrained himself.

“What are you doing here?” Jiro questioned.

Selina didn’t say anything, but looked around then smiled. Taking her hands out from behind her she held a bag of sweets.

“I brought crackers,” Selina said.

Jiro watched as Selina walked over. He couldn’t help, but notice the sweat pants and plain t-shirt she had on. It made him wonder if she had just come right from Chun’s. Leaving the box of crackers on his desk Selina brought a few with her over to the couch. She chewed on them silently and when she noticed Jiro’s curious eyes she smiled and laughed nervously.

“What?” Selina asked.

“Did Chun find you?” Jiro questioned.

Selina nodded her head yes while chewing on the crackers silently. It was as if she was trying to be busy eating on purpose.

“You know he was really worried when he didn’t see you. We searched the whole building for you,” Jiro told.

Selina kept silent wondering why Jiro was talking about Chun.

Jiro felt frustrated seeing that Selina wasn’t responding. Did she understand at all? Wasn’t she having a hard time at all? Didn’t she care about whether Chun minded her being with him at all? Did Selina not notice how deep Chun’s feelings were?

“We’re just friends right Selina?” Jiro asked.

Selina turned to look at him, but did not reply.

“If we are you should stop coming to my office to hang out. Others might take it the wrong way and Chun will misunderstand if rumors start to spread. This office is used only for business matters,” Jiro explained slowly and seriously, “you shouldn’t stay behind if there’s nothing to do either. If you keep coming in I’ll just get distracted from my work and that’ll throw every department behind.”

Selina still remained silent.

“Do you get it Selina? I don’t want you to use this office as a base to get away from your problems. If Chun finds out that you keep coming here and if he finds out that you’re with me he’ll hate me for the rest of his life.” Jiro told.

Silence occupied them for a moment.

“Selina…if in the future I happen to do things without explanations understand that I’m doing it for our own good,” Jiro said.

Before going on the phone rang and Jiro quickly answered. Selina listened in on the short conversation until Jiro hung up.

“I have somewhere to go right now. I hope that when I come back you’ll be back at Chun’s house,” Jiro said and walked out.

As the elevator doors shut behind him Jiro let out a breath of relief. He had sounded meaner than he had expected. He also hoped he didn’t hurt Selina’s feelings too much.

*_*_*_*_*_*

Selina sat immersed in complete silence. Was Jiro angry with her? But what had she done? She’d only wanted to give him some snacks and hang out before going back. Was that what had made him angry? Smiling Selina got up and went over to Jiro’s desk.

*_*_*_*_*_*

Ella stared at the dark ceiling lying flat on her bed. It had been an hour and half since she had tried to fall asleep. She was up to the point of giving up on sleep already. Her mind was always occupied with something. The cottage incident…even Selina didn’t say much about it. It was clear about what Selina had said about Jiro lying. Just seeing her then made Ella realized that Selina did not know anything about becoming Jiro’s girlfriend. Ella had already mentally fixed the puzzle before having run into Selina. Ella’s reality was that Chun had feelings for Selina.

How much pain Ella felt her heart was in, but if only Chun had told her clearly face to face that he had no more feelings for her it would have been already. Yet, that was the only thing Chun had never done, and because Chun had never said those words to her Ella was still hanging on. The hopes of Chun still loving her never left.

That despairing and overwhelming feeling of being lonely quickly filled her up. The thing that she most feared and hurt the most was that now Jiro was out of her way. Jiro wouldn’t block her from getting close to Chun anymore, but even so there was still another obstacle. Ella realized that even if Selina didn’t want to be in the way Chun would want to hold onto her. With Chun holding onto Selina would make it harder for Ella to get through to him.

*_*_*_*_*_*

Selina let the wind sweep through her hair. She never realized how hard it was to clear her mind. Looking around in the dark Selina sighed and pushed her hair back. There was something that seemed to be kicking at her from inside her head, something that had been pushed back when her grandfather had suddenly died. Selina stood still for a moment and turned a few times. She let the wind whistle into her ears and felt the silent night sky fall over her. There was something that was bother her, she was sure of that. She wasn’t aware that her mind was already confronting her own self.

Selina gently kicked the ground wishing she had some other place to go. Had she ever been so pointless before? Why did she not realize anything she was doing? But why did everything that worried Jiro have to do with Chun?