After the night in Donghae´s apartment, we returned to being friends. I´m not sure, if we were really friends before but that´s what it looked like now. And Donghae´s character remained mysterious. It was apparent that he wasn´t always happy, quite the opposite, but he tried to stay calm. He would often say something nice or give me a massage and that was really appreciated from my side. But somehow in a wicked way, it was making me act weird.

“You pick out only the best pieces, Hyukjae,” Donghae whined looking at the grilling meat. We were sitting in a restaurant and eating grilled pork with honey sauce.

“They are all good,” I rolled my eyes. I wasn´t leaving only the bad ones there on purpose.

“You should eat the fat too, it´s good for your joints,” Donghae picked out a white piece and put it on my plate.

“I have good joints,” I told him and ate the meat. Then I picked out another nice piece from the grill.

“Again! I was saving that one! I clearly put it on my side of the grill,” the brunette was sulking. And he had the reason for it because, indeed, I ate that piece on purpose.

“You have money, just buy a whole serving for yourself then,” I snorted.

“What do you mean by that?” Donghae suddenly lost his appetite and put the metal chopsticks on the table. He crossed his bulky arms over his chest and looked at me sternly. I couldn´t act jovial anymore.

“Well,” I started but didn´t know how to continue. I meant that he had enough money to be counting pieces of pork on the grill. But I couldn´t say that, it wasn´t the best thing to say actually. I might have been once again too rude.

“Eat it all, I´m not hungry anymore,” Donghae grabbed his glass of coke and drank half of it at once. He was pissed, it was obvious. Yet he didn´t yell at me.

The atmosphere became awkward as always whenever I would say something stupid like that. I had no idea where those words were coming from, my true personality must have been coming out in the end. I bit my lip and knew that I wouldn´t be able to swallow anything anymore at this rate.

“It will burn, idiot,” Donghae broke the horrible awkward bubble at once with his statement. He picked his chopsticks and began taking out the sizzling pieces of pork. He put some on my plate and some on his own. “Eat,” he mumbled after that and I breathed out.

I felt like I should apologise for causing the bad atmosphere in the restaurant. I decided to do it later so when we were walking back home, I suggested taking a stroll in the park. The weather was already almost winter like. In the darkness of the park, I felt like I could speak a little more freely. The small white clouds of hot air coming from our mouths were making every word seem smoother and lighter.

“You know, Donghae,” I began and buried hands into my pockets, “I feel like I´m sometimes being a bit too much towards you, I´m sorry.”

“I have no idea what you mean right now,” Donghae chuckled, “like you are so awesome I can´t handle you or what?”

“No!” I widened my eyes and stopped walking. How could he come to a conclusion like that? “It´s the opposite! I always say something bad to you and even make you pay for everything.”

It was like that a lot. We would eat together or have coffee but it would be almost every time Donghae, who would pay for it all. Even if it was me who invited him out. It wasn´t fair, because the whole situation came from my assumption that since the latter makes more money, he should pay. But let´s be realistic, Donghae has more money but isn´t actually rich. And also I myself have enough money to spend, I have two jobs after all. I just wanted to make things clear between us.

“Is it about that thing in the restaurant again? It just slipped, I´m not mad,” Donghae told me with a small smile on his lips.

“It wasn´t just today, I´m like that pretty often,” I said to make him realise that he shouldn´t let me off so easily.

“Actually I understand your friends now,” Donghae threw his arm over my slouched shoulders. “It´s a good feeling to take care of you. I feel like I´m doing something nice.”

Here we go. I can´t believe my ears, I turned Donghae into one of my victims. Just like Kangin and Yesung and many more. That´s horrible, I didn´t want that, I didn´t want to be so pitiful that even a cold guy like Donghae would begin taking care of me. I was an adult and I was fine by myself, I didn´t need anyone babying me!

“Don´t,” I huffed and Donghae bent his head to look into my hidden face. “I´m not a child. I can take care of myself and you have to tell me, when I say something hurtful to you.” I announced so childishly that I wondered, if I shouldn´t have stayed quiet instead.

“I see,” Donghae hummed, “so I shouldn´t visit you when you feel down anymore? Maybe I shouldn´t pay for the meat either and when we´re at it, don´t you think you should divide your pay from zoo with me?” Now, he was just mocking me.

“I´m serious, Donghae,” I looked into his eyes to show him my determination but what I saw made me completely forget about everything. “Why are your eyes so shiny?” I blabbered right away. There wasn´t any hint of their usual darkness. Yes, they were glassy and deep but I guessed it was how they were naturally. I couldn´t stop looking.

“What?” Donghae for the first time lost his footing and looked away embarrassed. His cheeks were beet red and only then I realised what I had said. Me and my mouth. And just when I wanted to apologise and take care of the bad atmosphere I kept making. So unfortunate.

“I just felt you looked so happy just now that it kind of shocked me,” I tried to explain, “not like you would be happy because of me or I don´t know but I only wanted to tell you that you seemed different. I don´t know how to explain it, it wasn´t meant bad, I swear!” The more I talked, the more I was getting entangled in my own words.

“Hyukjae, stop talking, please,” Donghae pulled his arm away from my shoulders and raised his scarf so high that half of his face was perfectly hidden.

“Are you mad?” I was very worried all of a sudden. This time I really didn´t want to offend him. What do I do now? “Donghae?” I tried to look into his face but Donghae kept averting his eyes.

“Donghae!” I called and losing my patience, I grabbed with both my arms his face and forced him to look at me. Donghae was so shocked that he practically stopped breathing and I felt really sorry, especially because the reason why he was so upset just couldn´t come to my mind. I wished to beg for forgiveness but I failed to identify the problem and for that I felt even worse.

“Hyukjae?” Donghae mumbled really quietly still looking at me wide eyed. I realised that I was thinking for too long and this whole time I was holding the poor brunette still.

Even after he called my name, I didn´t know what to do and in the end it was Donghae, who came to senses first. He sighed and closed his eyes. He opened them again after a while with endearment written all over his face. Seeing that, I calmed down, he wasn´t mad at me. From worried my expression melted into relieved. But only for like three seconds before I got the shock of my life.

Donghae with his hands took off my palms from his face and pulled on my wrists. I made an uncertain step forward and my body stopped only with an impact of Donghae´s lips on mine. I couldn´t believe that I was kissed by a guy! I complete forgot, Donghae was gay, wasn´t he?

Fanservice:

EH: My height is 174 cm.
Guest: Without insoles?
EH: YES. 

Hello. It´s sunday and the promised update that will hopefully make you bite your lips. :) I really liked SiHyuk interaction just now. Siwon complaining that Hyuk doesn´t call and a few days later Hyuk complaining that he called but Siwon didn´t pick up. Such a mess. Thank you for reading and have a nice day. - PandaHero