Mopping the empty cage of monkeys, I was trying to hold my breath. It was Tuesday and to Yesung´s happiness I was feeling much better. I wish I could deny it but the truth is, I definitely liked Donghae saying those words. That he would see me on stage no matter what. You can´t hold back feelings like these. I really wanted to be praised in my current gloomy state of mind.

“It ing stinks!” I turned my head towards the brunette man standing in the doorway and holding his nose. “That´s the worst job I´ve seen you do so far.”

“How did you find me here?” I asked quite surprised. Even if he managed to enter the zoo as a visitor, finding me here wouldn´t be easy.

“I went to the staff room and looked it up on the board,” he shrugged as if it was completely normal to trespass.

“Donghae, you can´t just walk around like that. You shouldn´t be in the cage either,” I sighed knowing my words would fall into a deaf ear.

“I think so too, why am I in this smelly cage. Hurry up so we can go feed penguins,” Donghae´s voice was high pitched because he was still holding his nose. I smiled and continued mopping the floor.

“Haven´t you noticed?” Donghae then broke the silence with a weird question.

“Noticed what?” I asked without even raising my head. I wanted to finish this work quickly.

“How do I look?” Donghae asked again and this time I had no choice but to look over my shoulder at the brunette by the door.

At first I didn´t find anything special apart from the weird pose he was sporting in the doorway. But then I noticed something different after all. Donghae wasn´t wearing a coat but an old padded jacket. He had sweatpants that were the same as the smiley ones I landed him before and old sneakers were decorating his feet that used to wear leather shoes. So he had ugly clothes, but what am I supposed to take from that?

“Um, did you change your style?” I tried with a joke.

“Exactly! And why?” Donghae continued with a wide grin on his face. I often see Donghae smirk, excited smile like that is also kind of new on him.

“I wonder,” I told him quietly because I was pretty curious by now. What´s with the change?

“Hyukjae, you really are no fun,” Donghae sighed and walked into the cage. I watched him weirdly as he grabbed a rag from the bucket of clean water and began cleaning the empty bowls for food. My eyes widened so much that I was worried they would fall of the sockets and end up in my equally wide opened mouth. Am I seeing things or did Donghae actually come to help me?

“What are you waiting for?! I´m not gonna do it by myself,” Donghae spat and I finally woke up from my shocked state. I smiled so much that the corners of my mouth started hurting and swung the mop around happily. “Tsk,” Donghae just snorted and continued wiping the bowls.

“I think you should give me half of your pay, I worked harder than you anyway. You were daydreaming most of the time,” Donghae said when we returned after a few hours to the staff room and heated up the lunch.

“You wish,” I rolled my eyes and spooned some rice.

“Ungrateful,” Donghae feigned hurt and shook his head. I chuckled loudly and almost choked on my food. The short man could be really fun when he´s not trying to be a bastard.

“I have to finish some work so I won´t be seeing you for some time,” I raised my head to look at the man in front of me.

“I see,” I only answered because I didn´t know why he was even telling me. It´s not like we promised to see each other at least once in two days or anything. It made me wonder, what´s going on in Donghae´s head. Is he planning ahead when he wants to meet me? That explains the times he was really angry because I wasn´t in a place he expected me to be or the other way, when I was somewhere, where I wasn´t supposed to be. I really wish I could read his thoughts or at least make him tell me.

“But it´s just so I could send the assignment earlier and then visit your musical,” he added in much quieter voice but I heard him and almost dropped the cutlery.

“Uh,” I only mumbled and suddenly became aware of the embarrassment I was feeling.

“I hope it´s worth, Hyukjae,” Donghae then snorted with his characteristic smirk and it threw me back into being timid.

“I think so,” I could only say bashfully and quickly pushed a big spoonful into my mouth.

On Friday I was barely able to let some food through my throat. Yes, I needed strength but I was super nervous. It was worse than on the premiere and I could feel my stomach making caterwauls every few minutes. I knew I was trembling and sweating way too much.

“Hyukjae, you okay? Aren´t you sick? You don´t look too good,” Kangin caught me and immediately began worrying.

Forget about the performance and his threatening words. When it came to the real deal, Kangin would rather make complicated arrangements than force me on the stage feeling bad. I felt really great being treated so well. Until I remembered once again Donghae´s stabbing words. I was being babied by my friends over and over.

“I´m fine, just nervous,” I told him the truth but Kangin didn´t seem to believe me and put his palm on my forehead.

“Indeed, you don´t have a fever,” he mumbled just for himself, “it could be a stomach ache then.”

“I´m seriously okay,” I forced myself to relax a bit. I wonder how bad I must look to make him think so far.

“You better not be lying to me Lee Hyukjae!” Kangin then tried to act tough but when I fearlessly nodded my head, he just ruffled my hair and wished me good luck before leaving.

I bit my lip and looked down on my shoes. No good. I had to calm down. First I hated acting like a wimp, Donghae warned me many times not to do that. But the worst thing was that I was probably feeling so nervous exactly because of him. I got a message earlier that he arrived and that I better do well, if I don´t want him leaving early.

You got it right, it threw me totally out of pace. Of course I would do well, I´m perfect on stage. But the fact was, that this exact truth I was hoping to convey to Donghae. That there were things I was good at, that I had things to take pride on. The stage was the only place, where I could gain the upper hand, even only a little bit. My body convulsed again. Today is going to be a rough day, I could tell.

The bell rang and the lights went off in the audience. I was waiting behind the curtain because the first scene was one of mines. Of course I wasn´t there alone. I was just a part of the choreography and my face would be rarely seen as I was standing right behind the main actor. But that was the purpose, I wasn´t supposed to outshine him and at the same time I had to be well seen for the others so they could follow me in case they weren´t certain in the timing or steps. You could say I was practically invisible but an important part of the whole play.

I finished perfectly as always. Scene after scene without a single mistake I was able to properly guide everyone to the grand ending. I forgot all about my nervousness and there was nothing else but confidence and eagerness in my performance. I was satisfied with myself and with a great smile on the lips rushed to find Donghae. I found him in the foyer.

“Donghae, so how was it?” I asked him as soon as I caught him.

I was overly excited. Way too much and missed one important fact. Donghae was just a spectator, spectator that failed to even see me and the whole structure of how the musical works and what is my role was a mystery to him. I tried to persuade myself, that it wasn´t his fault and that I shouldn´t have invited him in the first place when he simply couldn´t understand it. But still it hurt. It hurt like hell.

“Please, don´t invite me ever again. What a waste of time. And do something about your dumb life, Hyukjae.”

Fanservice:

My excellent son Lee Hyukjae!

Of course, this genius has been doing everything well ever since he was young~

We are planning to talk when we meet you in a while and i hope to hear a lot of your tales of heroism~
Bye ^~^

From Dad in Seoul♥

Hello! Finally an update, huh? I guess in this story it will be impossible for me to update more than once or twice a week but you are still curious I hope. It may seem that Hyukjae and Donghae are running in circles but trust me, things are changing slowly. :) Also I was thinking of putting some funny parts from Hyukjae´s letter to ELF here but I thought that Hyuk´s dad was even funnier so enjoy the fanservice. Thank you for reading and don´t fall sick! - PandaHero