Thankfully, the effects of the caffeine soon wore off, and Siwon was able to revive the fallen leader.

“Lord, have mercy,” he intoned. “Christ, have mercy. “  He clasped his hands together soulfully. “May your healing hand touch the wearied spirit of our leader. Grant him peace and patience in this time of—“

“A-frickin’-men,” Heechul interrupted. “Okay, Leeteuk, we’ve been sitting here forever listening to Shisus. Can we please do something else now?”

Siwon frowned in disapproval. “If you deny God in front of others, he will deny you on Judgment Day, Heechul,” the younger member warned.

Leeteuk sensed an oncoming conflict, and quickly intervened. “Alright, guys!” he loudly called. “Today, we are going fishing and berry-picking!”

“Fishing?”

“Berry-picking?”

“Yup,” the leader affirmed. “Mostly because we don’t have enough ramen noodles to survive another day. So we’ll gather our own! And to do that, I’ve come up with a plan.” Here, he paused for dramatic effect.

“What are you doing? Finish your sentence.” Kangin demanded.

“Well, in a variety show, they’d pause the picture here and be flashing some words across the screen, so…”

“ARE YOU IN A VARIETY SHOW? FINISH THE SENTENCE!”

“Okay, okay, geez… Anyway, I thought that we should divide up into an A team and B team, like we did on Explorers of the Human Body. Remember, guys?”

“Easy for you to say,” Kangin muttered. “You were on the A team.”

“Yeah,” Hangeng piped up, “You weren’t the one who was catapulted backwards into a pool!”

“I had to kiss Eunhyuk,” Sungmin reminisced.

“I think it’s a good idea,” Kibum said. “We’ll get more done this way.”

“Weren’t you on the A Team too?” Shindong asked suspiciously.

“Let’s vote on it,” Siwon suggested. “All in favor?” Eight raised their hands. “All against?” Six other members raised their hands.

“No opinion,” Zhou Mi declared.

“Okay, then, we’re going in teams!” Leeteuk announced. “Just to keep it simple, we’ll keep the teams we had in the last episode of EHB.”

Sungmin furrowed his brow. “So, Team A was…” he frowned, trying to remember. “Leeteuk, Heechul, me, Donghae, Siwon, Kibum, and Kyuhyun?”

“Let’s take one more to balance it out,” Siwon decided. “Hangeng, Kangin, Shindong, Eunhyuk, Ryeowook, Henry, or Zhou Mi?”

“Am I not even an option?” Yesung wondered.

“I guess you could be, but it would be unexpected,” Heechul remarked dryly.

“Are there no unexpected results?”

“We pick Zhou Mi,” Kibum decided. “He and Sungmin can help Kyuhyun.” He nodded at the still-comatose maknae.

“Good choice,” Leeteuk approved. “And Team A will be going fishing.” Donghae cheered.

Ryeowook trembled. “We’re going back into the forest?”

Eunhyuk slapped his back. “Welcome to the second-rate team.”

“We’re wasting daylight here!” Leeteuk barked. “Everyone, go get ready, and we’ll start our day, okay?”

Henry raised his hand. “I think we should add a rule: whoever brings back the most food gets bigger servings at dinner tonight.”

“YAH! Canadian! Do you want us to starve?!” Kangin shook the youngest member back and forth. “Team B never wins, you idiot!”

Leeteuk banged a small rock against the log like a gavel. “Meeting dismissed!” he announced. Team A happily went off to their tents to change, while Team B sat around, muttering mutinously.

“We’re dead. We’re tho dead,” Yesung said.

“Tho dead?” Ryeowook asked.

“Thowwy. My lipth are thtill thwollen,” Yesung explained.

Shindong buried his head in his hands. “Canadian… What have you done?”

Hangeng clapped his hands. “Okay, no more negativity,” he declared. “I think we have a good chance of winning, actually.”

“Yeah,” Kangin added, “Since they’ll probably end up scaring the fish away, and all we have to do is find berries…” He trailed off. The hearts of Team B began to fill with hope again.

“Let’s do this!” Eunhyuk cheered. Team B retreated to their own tents to change as well.

Hangeng crawled into the tent he shared with Heechul.

“Your team is so dead,” Heechul grinned.

Hangeng shrugged mysteriously. “We’ll see.” He began rifling through his duffel bag. “Huh. That’s strange. I swear I packed it…” he muttered. Heechul gave him a curious look. “My other set of underpants,” the Chinese man explained. He squinted suspiciously at Heechul. “Did you take them?”

“Yah, do you really think I’d want those?”

Hangeng cocked his head to the side. “Well, if not you, then I don’t know who else could…” he trailed off and his eyes went wide. “Underwear Thief!” He crawled out of the tent. “HENRY LAU! 內賊! GET OVER HERE!”

Over in the KyuMi(n)ry tent, the Canadian was frantically diving under his sleeping bag. “Hide me!” he squeaked.

Zhou Mi gave him a bored look. “Sorry, don’t feel like it.”

Hangeng’s footsteps were drawing nearer.

“Help!” Henry, in a complete panic, tried to leave the tent, only to be blocked by Sungmin. “Hyung! Why~?” he whined.

The violent rabbit gave him a burning look. “Last time you tried to escape up a tree, I almost died, remember?”

“HENRY LAU! GET OUT HERE!”

The youngest looked at his tent mates with watering eyes. “I’m too young to die!”

Zhou Mi patted him comfortingly on the back. “Don’t worry. I know an excellent undertaker.”

CLANG. CLANG. CLANG. CLANG.

“Huh. Apparently the pot now functions as a funeral bell,” Kyuhyun commented.

CLANG. CLANG. CLANG. CLANG.

“No…” whispered Henry. “No!”

CLANG. CLANG. CLANG. CLANG.

“I WILL RIP THAT POT APART WITH MY OWN HANDS EVEN IF IT’S THE LAST THING I DO!”

Just a short one this time... Sorry... :| But if you have an extra minute, mind checking out my new oneshot? http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/112331/twas-the-night-before-christmas-christmas-comedy-leeteuk-oneshot-superjunior     <--is this how you write in links? **is a computer n00b** 

Later, gator! (I'm so cool ^^)