A sea of people, there were too many people and you had a tight hold on him or that was what you tried to told yourself. But the truth was another, a really big another. That the moment he said that name your hold on him started to loss grip, starting to letting him go, it was slow and without warning. You did looked behind once and you saw those chocolate eyes that knew what you were doing, so you would look fast forward and try to reject that truth that you could see in his eyes. The sea of people was the excuse, letting the grip dissapear, and you did said his name like a prayer and with the following of an apology. And you left, and you did turn around and you saw him looking for you, and for a moment you swear he saw you and smirked, but it had to be the blink of eyes because the next moment he was looking to the other side. And you ran, it was again your turn to dissapear like a magician. You ran with shouting of your name, with the echo of a name, with closed eyes. Because you knew the way like the palm of your hand, so you ran. Without breathing and looking you ran.

You didn't stop, you didn't need to and couldn't. Because maybe he could be following you and maybe he already knew as he seemed to know everything about you and you so little about him. Discovering him with every new day with him that brought new surprises. You run without watching back, you knew were you where headed and that was enough. You took sharp turns, you did so that noone could follow you, you knew how to loss someone, and that said something about you and Kim Jongin. You were running without breath but you were almost there so you would push a little more. Just a little.

It was a pain that travelled through your whole body, it was painful to breath, your pains cried with any movement, your brain was pleading for a break. But you kept going, it was a slow killer that even it was pleading for a break. It was the fastest and hardest you had run in a while. You had run with Jongin but  that was nothing, a walk through the park. This was madness, this time was of true pain and desperation. You heard the murmur of your name, didn't check the hour maybe you should still be at school (but no it was too dark outside), you felt movement close to you but you didn't pay no mind, if anything you push a little harder. Climbed that stairs like it was such a struggle, holding to the handrill  as it was your life saver, your only connection to the world and you were slowly dying. The crack of wooden, of one of the treads and you knew you were been followed, so you try been faster and running and jumping to your door and closing it with lock, while letting your body rest against the close door.

It was an automatic action, your eyes were looking at those closed doors like it could look trough them, like they could melt it. And perhaps not only the doors but also what you were really looking at, the real reason behind everything. You wanted to make it dissapear, make it not exist. And then you could stay with Kim Jongin getting lost and getting found. For the longest of times you wanted to forget your secret, letted be and move on. But like a repercussion that makes you remember of what happened before. That was the name Kim Myungsoo, a injury re opened, and it hurted. Because it made the wish stronger and you wanted to push away Kim Jongin. Because you remembered ice c