CHAPTER 12

I enjoy the wonderful night with Taemin, our first date. We had dinner and went for a walk at the Han River. I made that night like if it was the last night, because it was. I kiss him like I will never kiss him again, I hugged him trying to take his scent with me. Once the night it’s over I will never see him again.

-This was wonderful- Taemin say with a smile that reach his eyes. -This is actually my first date. Did you know that?- he asked me. I was surprise to learn that.

-No, I didn’t know that. I thought you…- 

-That I had experience? - He interrupted. -No, I never went out with anyone before- 

-So that mean that what happened yesterday was your first time too?- I say with curiosity. 

Taemin nodded and looked at me with the sweetest smile. In that moment I took my phone and took a picture of him. That was actually my only picture on my phone. Taemin took my phone and and took some other pictures of us, smiling together, making silly faces and finally another one kissing. It was the perfect ending for the perfect date. 

-Taemin, can I asked you something?- I asked.

-Yes, anything.- 

-What were you and Minho talking about the night of the Karaoke?- 

Taemin went silent for a moment, and then he smile a little embarrassed. 

-You notices.- he said.

-It’s there something going on between you two?- I was trying to keep it cool, I did felt a little jealous. That night I caught them, Taemin even seem nervous. And the way Minho likes to have any kind of fiscal contact with him it was pretty obvious that something it’s happening there.

-No, there is nothing between us. But that night Minho actually confess that he was attracted to me, he was asking me for a chance.- Taemin told me the true very casually, he was trying to be honest. But it was evident that I was jealous, no matter how much I was trying to hide it. Taemin seem amused by it, just casually smiling at me and looking me with mocking eyes just waiting for the moment that I would say something. 

I it up, I didn’t say a word about it, just nodded like he just told me he likes cats instead of dogs. “No big deal” I said to myself. When Taemin notice my fail poker face, he hold my head between his hands to direct my eyes to him. 

-I told him I was interested in someone else- He said trying to make me feel less uncomfortable. It was like he could see right through me. He knows what I’m feeling, what I’m thinking. I just hope he can’t see in my eyes that tonight it’s our last night together. Now it got me thinking what will happen when I leave. Does Taemin will get sad? does Minho be there for him?. Or maybe everything will change. Taemin destiny will become different now that he will grow up with a father. 

Finally, when our date was over, I walked with him to his car, we kissed for long time before saying goodbye.

-Would you like to come with me to my apartment?- Taemin invite me. I honestly wanted to spend all night with him, but no just this night, but all my nights for the rest of my life. But if I go with him I wasn’t going to be able to leave him. I wanted to do this as quick as possible before I could change my mind.

-No tonight Tae. There is one thing I need to do. I promise we’ll have plenty of nights.- I lie. By tomorrow Taemin will become someone else and this will never be in his memory.  

-Ok. Then I’ll see you tomorrow. Don’t be late. I’m still your boss- he joked pointing a finger at me.  We both smile in agreement and kiss one last time. When we broke the kiss so Taemin could leave, I hold into him for a few more seconds telling him my secret goodbye. 

-Wait!- Taemin stopped me.

-What is it- I said turning back.

-I want to give you something- Taemin said getting a small box from his car. When he gave me the box, I took a look at it.

-What it’s this? - I asked shaking the box, making it rattle.  Than I opened the box to find bracelet made of wooden beads and a small cross hanging from it. -What it’s this for?- i asked looking at the bracelet. A moment of deja vu invade my senses. This bracelet was a gift from my father, and his father gave it to him. I can even see carved on one of the beads our last name initial. “K” for Kim. But there was another letter carved next to it, it was the letter “T”

-My father gave that to me- He said. -He told me to give that to someone very special to me. Look, and it have our initials carved on it.-

I looked at him with socked. Why it’s Taemin saying that. He never met his father and he knows I know that. 

-Your father?- I asked making sure that he said those words. Taemin just smile with happiness and excitement that he was giving me something precious. He nodded to my question. 

-When did you father gave you this?- I became uncertain of what was going on.

-When I turn eight years old, on my birthday. That day he told me that when I meet someone special, I should give this bracelet. That with this bracelet, he will always find his way to me. So if you ever get lost, this can help you find your way.- He said putting the bracelet on me.

I didn’t want to ask any more. Hearing Taemin talking about his father like he knew him gave me goosebumps. That was the beginning. Things were beginning to change already. I haven’t even left and I can see Taemin it’s changing, he’s remembering his father now. Silently I begin to cry. Taemin thought they were tears of joy, but they were actually tears of sadness. I gave him one last huge and walk away. 

-I’ll see you tomorrow- he said before telling me for the last time that he love me. 

Jongin, 1992

Jongin’s room

I’m finally back in 1992. Everything look just like the way I left it. My room, my cloths, my stuff were all there. I look at the clock 3 am, probably about the same time I left for the future. Leaving 2015 was harder than I thought. S