Hell... That was an understatement for what Myungsoo was living with. It was worse than hell. Myungsoo had been successful in getting Sungjong to fall for Hoya, but Sungjong wouldn't give his heart to him completely. Myungsoo didn't feel accomplished at all. Living in his personal horror movie, that's what he felt like.

He felt that was he was slowly dying inside. Seeing Hoya and Sungjong holding hands. Then they were hugging. And then all the small touches. And then kissing on the cheek. And then full out making out. Yeah... Myungsoo was there for all of it. It was worse than being burned alive, worse than dying of frostbite, worse than swallowing poison, worse than being stabbed and beaten by strangers. Everything wasn't as bad as being destroyed slowly, inside out.

That was the pain of love...

This was the pain that Myungsoo had been trying to evade his entire life. This was the pain that he didn't want Sungjong to feel. He was only dealing with this pain for Sungjong, only Sungjong. Everything that Myungsoo did had to do with Sungjong; was for Sungjong. He chose to harbor this pain so Sungjong wouldn't have to, so Sungjong never had to feel it.

"Myungsoo..." Sungyeol murmured worriedly, placing a hand on Myungsoo's shoulder.

He glared at his hyung with cold, dead eyes. The usual coldness and glare of intense hidden emotion was wiped away. His gaze was dead, emotionless, and lacking mental comprehension. He was dazed. Swallowed by his sadness, his sorrow, his tears, his pain, Myungsoo's poker face was no longer a ruse. Sungyeol flinched visibly at his dongsaeng's lifeless face.

"This wasn't a good--"

"I know..." Myungsoo answered quickly.

"Then why--"

"I have to live with it..."

"But--"

"For Sungjong..."

"Are you even listen--"

"No, I'm not listening to you..."

"How did you--"

"Because you're predictable."

"Myungsoo--"

"You're not convincing me otherwise..."

"But, Myungsoo--"

"It's for Sungjong's sake..."

"Dammit, MYUNGSOO!! Let me FINISH!" Sungyeol yelled.

Myungsoo just placed his chin on the palm of his hand.

"You're going to kill yourself..."

"I'm not suicidal, hyung."

"Myungsoo... Rethink this..."

"I already know that my preference on love is demented and completely defected. But I'm not changing my way of thinking."

"Myungsoo..."

"Just leave me alone..." He got up and put on his shoes and snatching his jacket.

"Where're you going?" Sungyeol asked.

"Taking a walk. I'll be back before midnight."

"Before ten."

"Midnight," Myungsoo growled.

Sungyeol bit his lip and exhaled hotly. "Fine. Be careful."

With that Myungsoo exited the dorm and walked away calmly, which turned to frantic jogging as thoughts of Hoya and Sungjong together plagued his mind. Myungsoo was soon just running as quickly as he could on two feet once the tears began spilling and the pain in his chest grew. He didn't know where he was running to or anything. All he knew is that he'd made a mistake, a mistake that couldn't be fixed. He had given away his heart, his love, his soul and entrusted it all to one person, who Myungsoo had turned away from and let go.

Myungsoo was an empty shell now. He had willingly given Sungjong everything, every single little thing, and then had run off. Well... That was who Myungsoo was. He gave everyone else his problems and then ran. He'd shoved Sungjong into Hoya's arms, and then ignored Sungjong. It was a mistake. Myungsoo hadn't rid himself of a problem. He'd created multiple problems, all of which would plague him until the epicenter of this chain of problematic causes and effects was solved. The thing is... What was the nub of this entire situation? And COULD Myungsoo fix it?

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A/N: Next chapter? !! ^^ Hope you enjoyed! ^^ And I know it's short >< Mianhae~~ <3