x

 

    My mind was in a blur. The thoughts flying in my head drowned around me, the cobble path in the garden, the cold chill of the night and the darkness that enveloped the garden so suddenly. It’s been minutes since the meeting with the Majesties had adjourned or so it may seem. I was dismissed by the Captain to my own time and was to go back to my chambers. Yet, it’s pass dusk and I find myself alone in this empty garden not realizing how long I’ve been circling it. 

 

    The chill that broke through my bones had been the only reminder of my existence at that moment. The shake of my shoulders waking me from my stupor had suddenly made me too aware of where I was. I clutched to my arms for warmth but jumped when another set of warm hands beat me to it. I look up to see Kai with his bright smile standing next to me. 

 

“You’re going to get sick.”

 

“Where did you come from?” I said through chattering teeth. 

 

    He flinched at the sight and quickly slipped out of his top coat. I watch as he slowed his actions and gently hanged the coat atop my shoulder as if I was fragile flower he’s scared to bruise. I try to pull the coat off of my body but his hands catch mine.

 

“Let me at least do this for you.” He tells me gently as he pulls the collar closer to my core. 

 

“Kai.” I clearly wanted to start something but just couldn’t make anything out. I was in a lost for words. Something ethereal was in front of me, dreamlike as he smiled only at me. Ever since his arrival, I couldn't help but feel enchanted by how much he's changed since I last saw him.

 

“Ren. You’ve been walking for hours. I’m not going to ask you what you’re doing here circling the gardens. I’m not going to ask you anything you don’t want to tell me or are not ready to tell me. But I need to say something”

 

“Kai…I” I wanted to say not right now. But his next words stilled me.

 

“Ren, come home with me. Your job here is done. The Queen and the Prince had given you leave from your duties as a guard. If you so choose.”

 

   It's not the first time I'm hearing it. The order came from the Queen and apparently the Prince had relayed it to Captain Lu Han. The thought had saddened me. I guess I hoped he'd talked to me after what happened. I thought maybe he'd tell me himself. Say something to me. But the acknowledgment, it's not in my place. It had never been my place to deserve that kind of acknowledgment so why I thought he'd give it to me, I don't know. I frowned closing my eyes because there's a tightness of my chest I can't bare.

 

“Ren,  there’s nothing for you here. The Prince had given you leave and he even excused you from your duties as his personal guard. Captain Lu Han also added that if you choose so, you are also excused from the ceremony the day after tomorrow.”

 

   I looked up at him that last bit hit me harder than the rest. It was as if I was being thrown out, forced to leave since I’ve over extended my use. It hurts to hear it from Kai even more since I feel the castle, the Prince and even the Captain slowly severing their connection to me.

 

“Ren, all I’m saying is… let’s go home.”

 

    Home is such a tempting notion right now. I missed my father so much and I longed to be with him again. But something inside me wants to stay only if it's just for the ceremony, even though I know in my heart it’d only hurt. 

 

"I barely trust anyone. Everyone is out to get the crown and well-"

 

“I thought we’ve become friends…” He began again. His eyes full of hope and anticipation now slowly breaking right in front of me, unbecoming of a Prince.

“Good friends.” I said low and soft.

“Really? Truly?" And suddenly he was beaming with joy.

"I can be your friend, Prince Sehun. Let's start with that."

“Everything had been chosen for me. My future had been set in stone before I was even born. And for once, I want to choose for me.” 

“This, this is my only chance in happiness. This will be the first and last time I get to choose for me and I don’t want to make a mistake. So please.  Please help me. Help me find a Queen, Lady Hei-Ran.” 

 

“I don’t know. I just figured, if you were able to befriend me, I would think you’d do great befriending the Prince. You know he doesn’t have very many.”

“Minah. I bet my gold in Park Minah.” I began to say

 

 

“Ren—”

 

“Kai, I will stay for the ceremony. Though the Ren in me wants nothing more than just to run home, I, Kim Hei-Ran, want one more night…”

 

    He looks at me in stern consternation but he quickly lets it go and looked away and into the lush garden.

 

“I understand. I guess you’ll miss this… all of this.”

 

    I frowned. That wasn't it at all.

 

    I look out into the farthest wall of the castle and I’m reminded of a thief of the night dressed in nightgown who scaled the wall, escaped, but came back. She slipped and fell on a boy also seeking adventure in the constraints of the suffocating castle. And instead they found each other and the walls had gotten more bearable.

 

“Not all, but some.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

    The Prince sits outside the balcony, legs dangling off the ledge in the air like a child. No, he’s not thinking of jumping, no he’s not depressed to the point of wanting to end his life. But he is saddened. The weight of his heavy heart making it seem like he had already fallen and hit the ground.  The face of the one he cares about looking up at him in shock, he had seen Hei-Ran's eyes well up earlier after he announced his decision. As if he had betrayed her, he kept telling himself it had been the right choice. Getting her out of the castle is the best choice. Keeping her safe and alive is the right choice. Even if that choice led her to someone else. 

 

    He chances a glance at the lush of the green grass and he’s reminded of a barefooted girl who tried to escape once a upon a time. ‘Thief of the night’ who scaled the walls of the Rose Castle. She dared to be different. She was very different. The other girls had paled compared to her. He must’ve fallen and Sehun thinks he’s fallen since the very first time they met. Even with her disheveled self, dirty from the day’s work in the shipping dock. Hei-Ran held her father’s hand unwilling to leave him in filial piety. He can still remember her every fidget, her very cautious move, the way she looked when she braved to leave for her father’s sake. Selfless she had always been. Beautiful is her heart. Now even more with her every action refined, she exudes the eloquence far from any noble lady he had ever met. Now he has to let her go.  His plans in action. Now she can lead a fruitful life away from the dread of the life in the castle. She can be happy even if it’s not with him. That is one of the conditions he and Kai had agreed upon. Now everything is in place. All that’s left is one last goodbye.

 

 

x

 

HEI-RAN'S POV

 

    If there was something I wanted more than ever, it is to find the me that everyone sees though I do not. I’ve heard it enough while I was back home how adequate a girl I am but I must clean up a bit and find myself a good man. It seems ages ago. I couldn't even picture it back then. Now, the pretty dresses and the makeover had helped tremendousl. A good clean up had done treasures for my esteem. It was holding myself to new standards for a better me. For the first time, I had taken care of what's important, me. I never thought myself lady-like or pretty, but right now I’m in awe with the ladies in waiting had offered for me today. The feeling of adequacy, it's my first time seeing myself beautiful. Full gown that dragged on the floor with floral accessories like a watercolor painting in a clean canvas. The bodice that clung to my skin is lace with a touch of color in just the right places. Simple, like I had been made the canvas by the creator. The flowers that bloomed the vines that s around my bodice, hugged tight flowing from one end to another with careful pink, blue and purple brush stokes. I watched the dress dance with my every move glinting against the lights in my room and I felt like a crystal figurine beautiful and enamored. 

 

“It had been a pleasure serving you, my Lady. I-” Sunmi had started to say but the look in her eyes had almost broken my heart. They have all been good to me. These ladies labored day and night when all they wanted was for me to try my hardest and win this contest. I’m truly thankful for them.

 

“Sunmi, thank you for all of your hard work. All of you have tried so hard— I’m sorry I couldn’t win this for all of you.” I reach to touch her hand and she lowered her head some more as if hiding her face. 

 

    And she did with good reason. When her voice broke and I saw tears running down her face, it took all of me not to do the same. 

 

“It’s just that, this was so abrupt and I really thought you were the one.” Sunmi began to say.

 

“It’s okay. I’m okay, Sunmi. The Prince, the Crown had always been a far reach thought for me. I never had a chance.” I mused as I squeezed her shoulder for comfort. 

 

“It wasn’t that far off, my Lady. He regarded you higher than just a lowly priest’s daughter. He looked at you differently. And you the same. I can see it and we can all see it.  How he looks for you in a crowd. How his face softens when he finds you. How at peace you become when you see him, soothing, calming with just his presence. Also… I am your head lady in waiting and I know about your tryst. “

 

“Our tryst? Oh Sunmi. Uh. Well it’s not like that. It can hardly be called that.” I shy away. I had no idea someone had noticed our meetings.

 

“Lady Hei-Ran, regardless my lady. We thank you for coming into the Prince’s life. I’ve seen him grow up you know. Apart from his First Guard, he had never had a friend. At least he’d have good memories to look back to later on in his life. Thank you.” Silence stilled both of us finding answers in each other’s gaze. Until a knock had woken both of us and we look away to shake away the glum. Sunmi opens the door and I hear a familiar voice I didn’t expect.

 

“Lady Minah. The Lady is—“

 

“Oh Lady Hei-Ran. I’ve been wanting to see you. After the news, I’ve been so busy with the arrangements—“ She trudges inside the room and finds my face and stops when she sees my current state. 

 

“Lady Hei-Ran pretty as always. Why do you looks so down?” I rush to embrace her tight with my emotions pouring. I couldn’t help but pull her tighter to me. Minah had been the kindest person to me here. I think somewhere deep inside I knew she’d win this. I know I’d never pass the Daughter’s Mansion if not for her. I know that if there is anyone who deserves to be here, it’s her. 

 

“I am so happy for you. I knew it’d be you. From the beginning I knew it’d be you.”

 

“Oh, Lady Hei-Ran. Thank you. I miss you already.” I pull away and takes a look at her face.

 

“I will miss you as well. But oh dear, come sit for awhile.” I pointed to the  lounge behind me. 

 

“So what will you do now?” 

 

    Innocently I answered with no pretense as I smoothed out my dress settling down in my chair.

 

“Find me my own Prince and marry I suppose.” Suddenly, regretfully I look to her and she catches my apprehension.

 

“It’s just right you do.” She says with a smile. 

 

And I do the same. Easing again into the conversation. 

 

“But first, I want to take care of my father.”

 

“And your mother?”

 

“I don’t know my mother. My father was a priest and well though I can’t put the pieces together, I will not ask. I am just grateful for all he’s done for me. It’s my turn to take care of him.”

 

Then she looks to me wide eyed and her expression suddenly turned weary.

 

“I’m.. I’m sorry to hear that. I didn’t mean to—pry.”

 

“It’s okay. How about you? I- I mean- You know Queen to be and all.“ I began to stutter and she suddenly chuckles.

 

“I’ll miss you.” She begins to tuck a piece of hair that fell in front of my face and gingerly looks at me with intent.

 

“Oh Lady Hei-Ran. Take care of yourself."

 

   She moved towards the throne, her eyes only focused on the Prince. A sharp pain hit me in the chest. Like all the air had been out of me. I held my breath aching with my every move. Stiff on my spot, I felt the ground shackle me still. I needed to watch this. I needed to see it and live in the every second of this moment.  I needed to feel every hurt and pain so I can move on and go on. But when I chanced a glance at the Prince I’ve regretted it. Our eyes met for the briefest second, and I faltered. Tears fighting to fall from my face must’ve shown it all. Because he remained watching me pained and narrowed. Could I have called out to him? Would he have taken it all back and changed his mind? Would he and I...

 

 

 

“My Prince.” A gentle voice woke him and his focus broken in an instant. She smiled and curtsied in the most regal way that only Park Minah can pull together.  He held out his hands and she unhesitatingly takes it. They walked to the middle of the grand ballroom and they began to dance. And suddenly I was just another face in the crowd. The two locked eyes, unbreaking as they were the only two people in the room and I alone watching, fading in the background. 

 

 

 

 

 

   That night someone knocks on the door of Lady Hei-Ran, slips a sealed letter and walks away unnoticed. It read.

 

“I hope you enjoyed yourself in the ball. I had picked a garden theme in your honor.

I hope you’d remember your time in the Rose Castle, with me,

like a breath of fresh air, my dear thief of the night.

Now you may escape and live your life fruitful and free.

Thank you for being by my side as short lived as it may have been.

Thank you for the adventure. 

 

Your friend,

the Night Crawler”