Though it had been cold and chilly lately,  the bright sun and the high spirit of everyone from the return of the Crown Prince had made it a perfect day for riding. The dates or so it had to be called for the sake for the lady participants, were now refurbished with a handful of guards and a party so big, it had become and excursion for the castle. Instead of a daily date alone with the Prince, now the lady participants are now to share the time with the Prince, two or three at a time. And I was officially to go in all of them as a precaution.

   Many things had changed of course. Suddenly, my wardrobes had gone through a make over. Using the same delicate fabrics, I felt it lighter and a bit more practical. I had been allowed to bring a dagger or two with me that I sheathed on a strap in my thigh, boot and corset. This was only after a couple of days training with Captain Lu Han after he deemed me suitable for the task in hand. 

"You are better than I thought. A bit rusty because of circumstances." He looks at my wardrobe. But then resigns to finish the compliment by handing me my first dagger that very same day.

"I feel so much at ease now. I thought I needed to groom you fit in this position. It seems you are more fit than some of my men." Then he whispers. "Please don't tell them I said that though."

   Today, the goal is horseback riding with Lady Yuri and Lady Sooyoung for the day. Two of the most opposite participants, they were chosen for the task because of their previous skills. I for one am a good rider so it was saw fit I came as well. No one has caught on yet of my new position as the lady participants' guard since Lady Minah had accompanied another date to the theater the other night with Lady Selis and Lady Emilia making it a random grouping of excursions than preference. Matter of fact, a few know of my position's existence; the Queen, First Guard, and the Prince.

   I ride back with Captain Lu Han as usual and he is as stern and alert as usual. And I found myself mirroring him now.  Straight back and broad shoulders, I mimicked it with the way my shoulder rolled back for width. It was absurd. I began to shake my head. Just when I thought I had left behind that life, mirroring others to survive. After taking this position, here I am again doing the same thing. My survival is a position and once again, I am doing everything I can just as I did as a lady participant. I'm mirroring another. 

    The day of riding could've been exhausting but I found solace in the ease of our excursion. I had not been asked to do anything else but ride alongside the Prince and the participants and it had been enough for me. Once in a while I would glance to the Prince to see if he's looking my way but he had not spared me time the whole day. 

   By the end of the day, I've noticed the Prince had inclined himself to be more receptive to the Lady Yuri. Though both had been an adequate rider, Lady Yuri had proven to be more flirtatious and engaging to the Prince leading the Prince to respond to her every whim. By the time we had dismounted, Lady Sooyoung was just about ready to leave feeling defeated about the day while Lady Yuri had latched herself onto the Prince successfully. It seems like the Prince had his own way of unwrapping the participants and he's able to weed them by himself. I watch Lady Sooyoung as she walked slumped to herself like she had been eliminated already. The way the Prince had made his decision at the spot had made it clear not only to Lady Sooyoung but also to everyone in the party. She did not peak the interest of the Prince. It wasn't that hard when Lady Yuri had made herself available in everyway, swooning at his every word and brushing her full chest against his slightly leaned-in shoulder.

   I felt a bit uneasy watching them flirt so much the whole day and I too wanted to leave just like the Lady Sooyoung but I still had a job I had to keep an eye on both the participants. When I didn't find, Lady Yuri, I gestured to Captain Lu Han that I'd be off on my own. I had only kept my eyes on the Lady Sooyoung and had resolved for Lady Yuri to be with Prince Sehun but he too was no where to be found. I figured he had enough of the day and he too already retired for the day. But still Lady Yuri couldn't be found.

   Moments later, as I wandered around in search, I finally found myself by the stables. Dusk was upon us and I had started to jog in worry that I still hadn't found her. Then I heard a giggle and it both shocked me and stopped me in my tracks. The distinct shrill of a woman's voice had made my steps stutter and curiosity had overcome me. I began to walk towards the back of the stables and the voices had become louder and more distinct. A man panting, a woman groaning. And ... I gasped to myself realizing what was going on. I should've walked away then but I had been more curious or maybe I had known. Because the temptation had not warned me and I trudged towards the back hiding myself behind the wall that now separates me and the couple doing whatever indecent thing they are doing there. 

   I should've walked away. I shouldn't have peeked. I should've left it alone since it was none of my business and more so. I shouldn't have felt what I did feel when I saw who was behind the wall. Lady Yuri and Prince Sehun locked in a passionate kiss. The Prince pressed against the wall, Lady Yuri had her body thrown for the Prince to enjoy. Her gown misplaced and unlaced. The Prince's hand on her bare thigh. He had pulled her close to him enjoying everything she had to offer him and he had not refused. 

   Another moan from Lady Yuri as Prince Sehun moves his wet and slick mouth to her neck and I had to hide myself clamping my own mouth to stop my own acceptance. He looked more into it that I had hoped.  I had imagined that maybe Lady Yuri had thrown herself and the Prince was forced into the situation but they were hidden behind the stables. It couldn't have been unplanned. He had been enjoying it from the looks of it with the way he now devoured her neck and then lips. To say that I was disappointed with the Prince, is an understatement. But more so, uncharacteristically of me,  I had been too engrossed and couldn't take my eyes off the Prince that I had been too mesmerized. I was shocked and repused yet as I stood there watching like it had been a show for me alone. The every linger of his mouth on her skin had me waver and suddenly I was clutching to my own dress. 

   Instead of moving along and remembering my vow to stick to my position, I had somehow wanted to be in the Lady Yuri's place. I had wanted to feel some kind of warmth form the Prince. Disappointed, I was. Yet, I had been excited to see this side of him. Now more than duty, I am jealous. There is a desire I could not place and I have wants that I can not admit to. 

It is not my place. It is not my place. I thought to myself but then I close my eyes and I somehow feel a warmth that pulls the very string of desire in me. I am in no place to want. And I think about his lips on my skin and his mouth devouring the every bare inch of my dignity and.. It's not my place.  I could only bite my lip to suppress the moan I want to let out as I watch him change their position. Pinning her against the wall and tightening his grip on her thigh like he had worshipped her body and bringing it closer and closer still. 

   I had to peel myself off the wall and forced myself to walk away. It is not my place. I have no right to want...

   Parted lips that called to him and spoke his name, Prince Sehun could not get the picture out his head.   He had Lady Yuri in the palm of his hands begging for many things he never knew he can ever be so open to offer and yet he thought of something else, someone else.  Had he imagined holding someone else at the very moment another supple grace had been throwing herself to him? Had he been imagining another voice that moaned in response to his every touch? Had he really imagined carding his fingers through a mess of red hair and calling her his forever, that very moment he was holding tight to Lady Yuri's deep raven ones? It is a damn shame the fantasy had to end the moment, Lady Yuri had called his name again asking him to look her in the eyes. It had broken the spell in an instant and he found himself running away faster than his feet can take him.

   It was Captain Lu Han who stopped him in track shaking him off of his daze.

"You look like you've seen a ghost."

   Eyes still distant, he answered without looking at the other man.

"I might as well have."

"Oh?" Captain Lu Han stared at him in confusion. But nothing else was said. Prince Sehun retired straight to his quarters leaving Captain Lu Han in the middle of the hallway.

"Oh this can't be good." Captain Lu Han says to himself. He gestures to the nearest guards to come forth and he does in a blink of an eye answer to his call.

"I will be staying tonight. It's another night of dancing I presume." He orders the sentry. It's already a known fact by now. The days the Prince has these kind of days, the dancing maiden will be visiting and Captain Lu Han will have to be there to assure the Prince. Nobody else needs to know why the extra close protection is needed but it happens more often than not.

   Sehun shuddered at the thought. The way he held onto her every curve his hands, his body and his mere mind thought it had only been Lady Hei-Ran. Prince Sehun turns to his side and wants to push the thought away. His hands clenched to the fabric beneath him, his hands had felt ghosted by red tresses that tickled his knuckles and palm and now he's restless.

How could this be? Why could I not let the image of her go?

  Prince Sehun tosses again and this time he grunts in frustration. He's been trying to ignore her and trying his hardest to prove to himself that he can protect her. It was a mere threat from the bandits, him losing the one and only person he's ever cared about, his mother's warning and his duties calling out for priority. He presumed that after the Lady's plea, he would let her go. Because she is right. It'd be cruel to keep her. But why of all things he wanted her the most, needed her the most. 

   Colorful flowers and lanterns fill the garden. Though this is not the royal garden, it has the same physique and grandeur to receive the public inside the castle grounds. It's the Lantern Festivals, a hundred year old tradition lighting up the castle enticing the whole kingdom to enter and join in the festivities. It is started with the preferred guest parading into the castle ground holding lanterns of their own. The public lines the pathway like stars in the night sky. And joins the sun that is the castle that is adorned with colorful ones making the Rose Castle the brightest star in the kingdom. It is a magnificent sight to see. However, for now, the participants are stuck inside another receiving room, getting ready for the festivities. The guards are in their posts, still uniform-clad as usual and it's a annoying to see. In my perspective, I scan the grounds below and nothing looks amiss but I am bothered by the guards that line the pathway and the garden itself. Maybe it was just me but it seems too uniformed and obvious to have so many gather just for a festival. There is no discretion as to their placement and I want to smack Captain Lu Han for being so obvious. I look back at the group of lady participants and they are all accounted for. They are grouped amongst themselves and I  stand by the window as another is stationed in front of the receiving door. 

   We are to come out soon and join the royal family as they officially receive the guests. Then we are to spend time with the Prince and hopefully show the guests how the contest is being won. That is where I am at a lost. I am supposed to watch the participants the whole time however, I was also meant to participate in the schedule. Nobody knows of my position and so the Captain and I devised a plan where my absence will be accounted for and my duty will not be missed.

   It's been days already and still I have not been graced with anything but a curt nod from the Prince. It almost seems like he's avoiding me but I know better. I am nothing at this point but his soldier. I understand this much and so I try not to complain much about my situation. I have to admit I miss our little talks and I've missed the real Prince Sehun joking around with me and asking me about my adventures, but it's comforting to know that I am still here and he's decided to keep me for now. I feel like I've seen the Prince almost all hours of the day because of my new position but the distance we have now makes me feel so far away. For once, I actually feel like the lowest ranked contestant or even a lady in waiting, somebody who does not need acknowledging. All thoughts aside from the incident from the other day, I had to will every ache and confusion to linger way, way back in my mind. Right now, at this moment, my tantrums and breakings had no turn to be felt. I am but another soldier under the Prince and I am just that.

   The Queen looks more than pleased by our situation. I catch her smiling sheepishly my way once in a while. I know she is more than happy to regard me as a new soldier of the kingdom and not as a prospect for her son. Still, I find her grimacing to herself when the Prince looks my way for no apparent reason. Brief as it is, it is disturbing nonetheless. It's as if he doesn't know me at all and just sees me as another one of his men.

   When the time came, we were introduced individually and the crowd showed preference through their hoots and hollers. Lady Minah looks to be the crowd's favorite and I can't be anything but happy for her. The lady participant introduced was then led to Prince Sehun in the dance floor for a quick waltz around the center showing off her magnificence to the more preferred guests who are able to gather around the center. Everyone else is able to watch from the line of soldiers in the perimeter. It is a beautiful show of the contest and for the first time, we were able to gauge the ranking of the participants as per the crowd's preference. Lady Minah and Lady Emilia are two favorites and it wasn't a surprise. They have showed prestige in many ways none of the other ladies have. I was surprise to see the crowd respond to Lady Yuri when she had giggled after the Prince had whispered something to her. The show is so becoming of a fairytale that everyone including me, was enamored by it all. I couldn't help but forget my place in this whole thing. Until, my name was called and I had to be shaken out of my daze when Captain Lu Han had nudged me from the side. I suddenly couldn't breathe as my fisted hands had been uncurled by the Prince himself and he received me with a smile. Something unlike what he had shown me the past couple of days. I was surprise more when he leaned into my ear and just basically breathed into it gently as if saying something endearing to me. I had not heard anything. He didn't seem bothered by anything.  Still,  I smiled pretending like I saw the other participants had done to him. I let go of my distress and just let the moment be because Prince Sehun is holding my hands and I had felt comfort. I had felt the warmth and comfort of home as he held my hands and cradled it into his. As the other hand pulled me closer to him, I had resigned to let go of my inhibitions and just let it be. Because this is just a show to the crowd and a dream to me. This will be the closest I'll ever be to him again. I will never see myself walk next to the Prince again nor would I be pressed against him. He'll never look at me with tempt, lust or even love in his eyes. And though sad I had resigned to my own place. I look past him and he seem to do the same. We were cold beings holding onto each other at the moment yet separated by a shield whence separating us.  I have missed the Sehun that snuck out of his quarters to see me by my wall. I miss the Prince that wanted so much to hear about adventures. I miss him just sitting close to me and enjoying our time. And as we accidently catch each other's gaze, I see a shocking plea of yearning and ache from the Prince that night he came to my room.  

"You'll always be by my side, right?"

   I wish now that I could take back what I'd said that night. I wish I could've said "Yes!" and exclaim that It's because I do not want to be apart from him. I wish I could've said that I'll be anything he wants me to be and I'll stay as he wishes me to and because I want to be with him too.

   Then, I was reminded of the different Prince who devoured another woman as if graced with experience and lust by the stables. I then felt the unease of it all and the show that is just a dream and the splendor of my pretentious situation. I am nothing without my position and right now, I am nothing but his soldiers. Not his lover or friend, just another passing person under his wing. 

[Prince Sehun's POV]

   And in the way she twirled around the dance floor with a sparkling smile so pure and light that he’s forgotten to breathe. He knows better than to hang on to this with everything he and Hei-Ran, had agreed to. But as she smiled and finally gazed at him. Even from beyond the line of dancing, he could feel it. He could feel the pull, the want, the need and as they stare without breaking contact, he knew right there and then, he’s found his only breath. That one that’ll sustain him for years to come. The one who’ll stand with him through it all. He’s found his Queen.  No regal propriety, no amount of manner and poise of what ought to be. Just pure lovely, Hei-Ran and her heart. He tightens his hold on her hand and brings her closer to him. The song is mere seconds away from concluding. But he doesn’t want it to end. A hairsbreadth away she doesn’t pull back or push him away. She stares with equal amounts of interest until their skin touched and she felt the very small contact radiating through her. A sharp breath stifles out of and he suddenly perks up alerting her. She steps back too quickly and the tie had suddenly been cut. The connection lost and she’s running away. The crowd parts for her but not for obvious reasons, they just do unmanned by everything else but themselves. She just left him in the middle of the dance floor without another word.

  But he doesn’t go after her, he doesn’t move, but instead accepts another candidate pushed by his taker. 

[Lady Hei-Ran's POV]

   It was the cold air that finally lets her breathe and she catches the heart that wants to leap clutching tight to her chest. It should've been enough to scale the wall to gain some freedom. With the new position, she had been granted many things now, and scaling the wall in the dark of night is one of them. But what was the use when there is nothing that awaits her in the bottom. She’s reminded of Lady Yuri, of Prince Sehun holding her tight in his arms in the stables. The way his hands roamed her body, experience showing from her unnerved face. But that wasn’t what irritated Hei-Ran. It wasn’t Yuri at all and her experience and her willingness. It was the Prince himself. He’d look at her with want, with lust. Eyes deeply intent in devouring her as he crashed their lips together as he pinned her against the wall and hitched her up to straddle him. He’s touched her every inch and she let him. 

   The heat inside Hei-Ran confused her in many ways.  In truth, as much as she had been so jealous, she came back to her room thinking of those hands roaming in her pale cold skin. The heat of his hands kneading every dip and curve of her. She’d wondered and thought of Sehun pinning her against the old dainty wall of the stable, her legs straddling him as he carried her height. She’d wanted all that. She’d wanted to be in Yuri's place. But that can never be. She’d become his guard.

   Hei-Ran slowed her pace now and began to let herself sink in the lush of the green grass. 

   What would happen to her now? Clearly she had no place here especially with the way Prince Sehun had received her when he came back.  What was she to do now? Where is she to go? There's no way she could stand to watch anymore of this contest if it especially would show how Prince would do his own 'unwrapping'. She wanted no part in it.  She thought about her duty, her responsibility and somehow almost lost her footing when she realized what staying here a bit longer would mean for her and her father.