Joonmyun froze at the sound of the voice, then he turned and looked over at the figure he had only distant memories of. He began to mumble softly a name that seemed so foreign to his lips. "J-Jongin...?" He heard that low chuckle he only remembered a little from high school. He walked into the room and took a seat on the edge of the bed.

"You know very well you shouldn't be in the hospital," he spoke in a gentle tone.

Joonmyun nodded and sat up, "Y-You're here--"

"I'm here only for you," Jongin nodded and held Joonmyun's hand. "Stop blaming yourself. It's not your fault."

"But I--"

"It's okay to be selfish once in a while, you runt," Jongin squeezed his hand and smiled softly. "You love Jongdae. You care for Yixing. You have a bright future. Just be selfish. what anyone says or thinks of you."

"But I hurt Yi--"

"Yixing is going to be hurt, but you need to talk to him about that on your own terms. Let him know how you feel. How you see the situation is different from what he thinks you see it as," Jongin nodded.

"H-How do you know about all this?"

"I did say I was here for you..."

Joonmyun launched up and looked around the empty bedroom. "Jongin! Jongin! Where are you?" He ran around the room looking for his friend. "I'm sorry! Jongin!" Tears welled up in his eyes as he franctically searched until he bumped the bookshelf and his backpack fell. A worn out envelope fell out and he began to cry at the sight of it. "K-Kyungsoo... Jongin... I-I..."

It's not your fault.

It's not your fault, Joonmyun.

You have a bright future.

Just be selfish.

His hands patted around until he grabbed his cellphone and went through the contacts. He chose his beloved friend and hit call almost too quickly for his phone to respond. Ring... ring... ring... His heart was pounding-- "I thought we weren't going to talk until we were CEOs, runt."

"Jongin... you--"

"I'm very much alive. What's up, kid?" He heard the reassuring chuckle and he let out a sigh.

"I have a lot to tell you."