It was Kim Hanbin. It really was him.

I hadn't seen him for 3 months. He still looked the same; the long nose, the downturned eyes, the faded dimples. He smiled as I walked closer, although he was visibly shocked to see me as well. I, meanwhile, didn't know how to react. I was angry at him for disappearing all those months, but I was also confused of this anger. At the same time I was happy and relieved to see that Hanbin looked healthy and happy compared to the last time I had seen him.

"Hey, oppa," I greeted Bobby oppa without looking at Hanbin.

"Hey, girl! How are you?" said Bobby oppa. He stood up and gave me a hug.

"I'm great. How are you, oppa?" Again, I purposely left Hanbin out of the conversation.

Hanbin had also stood up to greet me. He leaned forward for a hug but I left him hanging and I took a seat. Both Bobby oppa and Hanbin were now standing up while I was sitting.

"Me too, I'm great. Hey, do you want anything to drink? Hot chocolate, maybe?" Bobby oppa asked me.

"Yeah hot chocolate sounds good," I said.

"Good, let me get it for you. Now you two stay here while I go to the counter, yeah?" Bobby oppa said. I could have sworn he winked at Hanbin while doing so.

Then Bobby oppa left. Bobby oppa, I am so gonna get you back.

Hanbin slowly sat back down. I felt him staring at me and I took out my phone and logged in on Instagram. Because that's what people do when they're nervous.

Hanbin cleared his throat and leaned forward towards the coffee table. He took a deep breath as though he wanted to say something, but stopped midway and sighed. This happened several times before the words finally came out of his mouth.

"Hayi-ah," he finally said.

Without saying a word, I lifted my eyes from my phone to Hanbin without moving my head.

"I--sorry I didn't know you'd be here. Bobby hyung just said he was going to treat me for coffee, he didn't mention anything about you," Hanbin said carefully.

"Oh, should I leave, then?" I lifted my eyebrows and pointed towards the door. I was trying my best to hold in my anger.

Hanbin leaned forward and took my phone. He put down my phone and held my hand.

"Hayi-ah, I'm sorry," he looked into my eyes. 

"Are you? What for?" I asked as I regained control of my hand. I really was curious what he was sorry for. For leaving without saying anything? For vanishing for three months?

Hanbin hesistated. I waited.

"I'm sorry for leaving you that day. I wanted to call, but I never had the chance. And I've been really busy these past few months, you know that. And I know you were busy too so I didn't want to disturb you," he said slowly.

"You don't need to apologize. It's not like you needed to call. There's nothing going on between us," I said coldly. 

And I wasn't lying. There is nothing going on between Hanbin and I, so there was no need for him to apologize or for me to be angry. Yet there I was, confused by my anger. I had missed Hanbin and I worried for him, even when I told myself that I was happy while promoting with Suhyun and Bobby oppa. I wanted to call Hanbin but I couldn't muster up the courage to tap that green button on the screen of my phone.

Am I in love with him?

Hanbin looked into my eyes. He saw through me, he saw through my coldness. 

"I just want you to know that even when I didn't call you, I was always thinking about you," Hanbin said.

He took out his phone from the pocket of his sweatshirt. In his phone's gallery, he showed me screenshots of him sending text messages to vote for the HiSuhyun unit on Inkigayo and MusicBank. He showed me a picture of himself posing next to a cardboard cutout of me, while holding a banner which bore the writing "Good luck Hayi-ah!". Then there was a video of Hanbin and Jinhwan reenacting the dance for I'm Different -- Hanbin as me and Jinhwan as Suhyun. The video ended with them fighting over Bobby.

I laughed, and Hanbin laughed with me. He looked at me endearingly, relieved.

"I'm sorry, Hayi-ah. I know I shouldn't have ghosted you like that," Hanbin said

"Yeah," I nodded.

Bobby oppa finally returned with just one cup o