Kyungsoo had woken up. He was actually awake and only a few feet away from Jongin. He could’ve touched him if it weren’t for the thick wall of earth and dirt surrounding Kyungsoo. Jongin hadn’t said a word since entering the room, just standing still, watching the spot where he knew Kyungsoo to be, trying to figure out how to proceed now. Luhan was asking Lay in detail about what Kyungsoo had said when he had woken up but Jongin had stopped listening after a while. He didn’t understand how they thought it more important what he’d said than getting him out of his earth dome.

A hand Jongin recognized as Chanyeol’s was placed on his shoulder in a way Jongin guessed was supposed to be comforting. After their rescue mission Chanyeol and Jongin had grown closer and Jongin had started to notice how Chanyeol always knew how Jongin was feeling without him having to say anything. Chanyeol was always there to comfort him when the stress of not knowing what was going on with Kyungsoo became too big, or to drink tea in the middle of the night when none of them could sleep expecting B.A.P to burst in through the doors with guns and other weapons. They didn’t always speak but Chanyeol still managed to make him feel better in times of desperation.

Now, however, was not the time for comfort. Now was the time for action.

Jongin stepped out from Chanyeol’s hand and walked up to the earth. It was rough, with roots sticking out from different places and if it weren’t for it being in the middle of a fairly modern house, Jongin would’ve thought it being a completely natural phenomenon.

“Soo? Can you hear me?” Jongin asked quietly as he placed a hand on the earth. It felt warm under his touch, as if a fire was brewing underneath it. He hadn’t expected an answer but the silence unnerved him.

“I know you feel scared right now, but could you please come out from there. We’re all worried about you and we just want to see that you’re okay.” He continued. The room was silent, everyone listening to what he was saying and Jongin just hoped that Kyungsoo was doing the same.

“Bad choice of words, I’m sorry, you’re probably not okay. Not after what they’ve done to you. But I promise you that will never happen again. I won’t allow it. I can’t see you hurt like that, it breaks my heart.” Jongin didn’t know if he was imagining it, but it almost looked like tiny cracks were starting to form around his hand.

“I just need you to be okay, to feel better again. I just want to see your smile, your tears, you being you...”

Taking a wavering breath, willing himself not to cry, he continued. “I’ve missed you, Soo. And I’m sorry for not coming to get you earlier. I’m sorry for a lot of things.

Will you forgive me?”

The earth under Jongin’s hand started to vibrate and by pure reflex Jongin threw his arms over his face just as the wall around Kyungsoo came down with a crash, covering the whole room in a layer of dirt and soil. When Jongin lowered his arms the first thing he saw was Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo was curled up in the corner of the room on top of the top half of the ruined bed. He, as well as the rest of the people in the room, was covered in a fine layer of dust but Jongin didn’t care about that. Kyungsoo was looking at him. His eyes were wide and slightly red, eyelashes sticking together and there were clear tear tracks running down his grimy face.

The whole room was in complete silence, the only thing moving being the dust floating in the air looking for a place to settle down. That’s when Kyungsoo extended a shaky hand before placing it on the wall, using it to haul himself up on unstable legs. No one was breathing. A pin could be dropped and it would deafen the world. Kyungsoo didn’t as much stand up as he fell into Jongin, arms circling his neck to pull himself closer to bury his face in his neck, inhaling the scent of the person who’d been the only thought to keep him fighting death. He was finally home.

“You have nothing to apologize for.”

~ * ~

Jongin wanted to do more. He wanted to help, be there for him, do anything, but Kyungsoo was avoiding him. Kyungsoo was avoiding everyone but Lay, and Jongin was missing him. He’d just gotten him back but he was still gone. He didn’t blame him, it wasn’t Kyungsoo’s fault but Jongin still felt empty and alone. He had asked Luhan about it but he’d just answered that it would take time. However Luhan had ensured him that Kyungsoo would open up and come back to him.

Kyungsoo was staying in Lay’s room and the only times he would come out was for dinner, and that wasn’t even every day. Most day’s Lay brought his dinner with him to eat with Kyungsoo in their room. The lucky days that Kyungsoo joined them he would avoid eye contact with everybody. But it didn’t matter to anyone, they were all just happy to see him and to see him gaining weight and a bit of colour again.

Jongin wondered what Kyungsoo and Lay were doing the whole days being cooped up in their tiny bedroom, but he guessed he would get to know when Kyungsoo started talking to him again.

Meanwhile, Jongin, Luhan and Chanyeol were planning what to do next. They still needed to find seven more people and to do that they needed some kind of plan. They’d been lucky with Chanyeol, him being famous and all, and Luhan had known where Lay were all along so that hadn’t been a problem either. They all knew that they would need to split up sooner or later, to be able to cover more ground, but right now wasn’t the right time. Kyungsoo still wasn’t good enough and even though three out of five pretty much had their powers under control, both Lay and Kyungsoo was still on the unsure side. And if they were to split up, Luhan would much rather not have two people being on their own if he could help it  At least not in the beginning.

It was during one of their usual planning sessions that Chanyeol suddenly interrupted Luhan by asking him to repeat the names of the missing people, looking as if he’d suddenly remembered something important. And he had.

“I know of a Baekhyun.” He said after Luhan had mentioned all the names. “I don’t know if it’s the one Baekhyun, but I was the right Chanyeol for you so maybe this is the right one too.”

“Can you elaborate on how you know him and how we can find him?” Luhan asked after a couple of seconds where both Jongin and Luhan had waited for Chanyeol to continue his experience.

“I don’t know this Baekhyun personally, and I’ve never actually met him either. He’s a fashion designer who’s known for not being known. You know, famous for never showing his face so everyone’s speculating about what he looks like, how old he is, if he’s actually a he. But this Baekhyun has designed a couple of stage outfits for my band so that’s why I know of him. If I remember correctly he’s currently staying in Tokyo, but I might be wrong.”

A quick google search later and Jongin could give them the confirmation that Chanyeol was right. Baekhyun the designer was living in Tokyo. Now the only question was where in Tokyo. That piece of information was nowhere to be found so their plan for the moment was to simply set camp inside the designing headquarters and hoping that either someone would let slip where Baekhyun lived or that said person would show up himself. It was definitely not a foolproof plan but it would have to work. At the moment it was all they could do, unless they wanted to travel aimlessly around the world, blindly looking for people that only one out of five remembered.

~ * ~

They had brought a spare bed into Lay’s room the day Kyungsoo woke up. A bed they all thought Kyungsoo used. Everyone except Jongin. The first night he’d been stirred awaked by someone climbing into his bed he’d been scared less. However when said person came close enough for Jongin to realize that it was only Kyungsoo he instantly relaxed. He’d been meaning to ask if everything was okay but he was too tired and he thought that he could just do it in the morning.

The next morning Jongin woke up to an empty spot beside himself and during the day he was starting to question that maybe he had just dreamed about Kyungsoo sleeping next to him. Then it happened the next night again. And the next after. Jongin was thinking about bringing it up to Kyungsoo during the day, but considering that Jongin always woke up alone he guessed that Kyungsoo actually didn’t mean for Jongin to notice him. So Jongin decided to let it be. Kyungsoo would come to him when he was ready. That was what Jongin had planned to do at least.

Jongin always woke up after Kyungsoo had already left. That was their routine. Except for today. Jongin was more or less half awake when he felt the body next to him move and before he could realize what he was doing he was throwing an arm over Kyungsoo’s waist, pulling him closer.

“Please stay.” He whispered against Kyungsoo’s neck and with that did the tense man in his arm let go. Jongin could feel how Kyungsoo relaxed in his arms and before he knew it Kyungsoo had turned around to bury his face against Jongin’s chest, small sobs shaking his body.

“I’m sorry.” Kyungsoo exhaled, hugging himself closer to Jongin.

“It’s okay. You have nothing to apologize for.”

~ * ~

Needless to say, Jongin and Kyungsoo stayed in bed the whole day. The morning was spent in quiet, Jongin holding Kyungsoo close, both of them taking the much needed time to just cry and be together. By noon Lay brought them lunch, whispering something to Kyungsoo and ruffling his hair before leaving them alone to eat their food. They were sitting facing each other on Jongin’s bed, eating, when Kyungsoo started speaking.

“I’m sorry.” He said, looking down at his food.

“For what?” Jongin asked after having swallowed his ginormous bite of rice and stew.

“For… for avoiding you, I guess.”

“Well, your apology is accepted but it’s invalid.” At that Kyungsoo actually let out a small laugh and it was all Jongin needed. He could feel his insides getting warm from just the sound and sight of Kyungsoo smiling.

“You’re still using that?”

“I guess so. Since you’re still apologizing for unnecessary things.”

“I am sorry, though,” Kyungsoo said but before Jongin could interject he continued “I was just so scared.”

“For what?” Jongin asked as he reached over and took Kyungsoo’s hand in his.

“Seeing you dead… again.”

And with that Kyungsoo told Jongin everything. He told him everything he’d been through as a living experiment in the B.A.P. head quarters. Every painful moment of having to live through another day. Every experience leading up to just wanting to never wake up again. The reason for him finding his powers and why he didn’t dare to look at either Luhan or Jongin, him being too scared that he would find himself in the same situation again, having to watch them die. He told him of how he regained his memories through tortuous experiences with electricity and fire, knives and scissors. How he had been so, so, scared when Jongin and Chanyeol had came to rescue him because he was sure that this was the ending blow.

Jongin was horrified. He could feel the hairs all over his body standing up in disgust of how anybody could put another human being through that sort of hell. He was so horrified. By Kyungsoo’s experiences but also by how Kyungsoo retold them. He didn’t cry. He wasn’t angry. He didn’t sound scared. He was retelling it all matter-of-factly as if he was reading out of a book. It scared Jongin. And he couldn’t help himself but feel immensely guilty. He knew it wasn’t his fault for what had went down but he wished he could’ve done something to prevent it from happening. Or at least have been the one to get kidnapped instead of Kyungsoo so that he wouldn’t have had to gone through it all.

“It’s not your fault.” Kyungsoo said as if he knew exactly what Jongin was thinking. “What has happened, happened and I’ll just have to put it behind me. It will take some time, but I know I can do it. Especially with your help.” He said the last thing as a question and Jongin immediately went forward to engulf Kyungsoo in a hug.

“Of course you will. And I will always be by your side whether you need me or not.” He whispered trying and failing not to cry “You are so incredibly brave, you know that right?”

“No. But if you say so I’ll try to believe it.”

“Good.”

“And I’m sorry for making you cry.”

“Well, your apology is accepted but it’s invalid.”

AN:

I just realized that I asically update this like once a year and that's kind of sad seeing how I'm really slow in the progression of the plot oops. But hopefully I won't take toooo long until next chapter because I'm soon up in 100 pages and when I reach that I will bake a cake yay.

I like how when I started this chapter I was like "yeah, so much will happen in this chapter!" and well we see what happened there ^^' I swear I have a plan when I start writing but somehow that plan always flies out the window because my characters decides to do something differently... stupid characters... they should all learn to listen to me!

But I've edited all the old chapters now! Yay! Finally! And that combined with all the going on in my life with performances and auditions I feel like I have absolutely no free time to write... sadness... And with I mean things that I love to do ehehe

Okay that's kind of a lie... I do have time but somehow whenever I find myself alone I decide to rewatch Rupaul's drag race, like what's up with that? So I could definitely be a more effective writer... And maybe, just maybe, I actually could focus on my not-finished stories instead of joining fic fests all the time? Just a suggestion from me to me, ey. (I might've joined EXOleague... oops...)

But hoped you liked this chapter if you're still patient enough to read this with the very few updates~ <3 You're all golden~

(I might've quoted one of my very dear friends in this chapter and that makes me both embarrassed and happy at the same time... The quote is quite stupid but I hope you like it anyway because he who says it is awesome and deserves the world x))