Me and Hoya got out from the taxi and walked to the dorm. Now it's him whose silent. I was thinking whether I should talk or not. I don't want him to get the idea that I care about him that much, eventhought that I truly care about him. I took a glance at him for a several time he just looked straight to the path in front of him.

We arrived in front of my dorm. Hoya sent me home and he's still not talking a bit. I wonder if he's shy or mad? I let go of his hand and faced him.

“uh... Hoya, thanks a lot for today... uh.. I had fun.” I said smiling to him awkwardly, but he just got nothing to say and left. I was worried maybe he does mad at me. “Hoya!” I called him, he looked back. “I'm so sorry for what happening today. You're my close friend, I don't want you to be mad at me.” The word friend was actually came out with a weird feeling inside of me.

Now he's facing me. “Mad? I'm not mad at you...” but then his face getting serious. “Friend? You still considering this relationship as friend?” I was startled at his sudden act. “Bora, you called this friendship? after what we through together, do you think this is all just a friendship?!” He yelled at me. I was scared, I stepped back a bit.

“Hoya..... calmed down, will you?” I said to him. I was shocked, he never thought of this as a friendship? Was he actually think this as a relationship?

But then he approached me and standing in front of me. His face was just an inche away from my face. I could barely sense his breath. Then Suddenly, he kissed my lips passionately and harshly. He was wild, he was touching me everywhere. He pinned me to the wall in front of my dorm. I didn't want to respond but my body said different. I kissed him back as passionate as he is. His kissed could control me and my body. He lifted me and positioning my leg circling around his waist. We was making out in front of my dorm's door. We stopped for a while to catch our breath. I looked at his eyes, his eyes were full of lust.

I backed to my sense as I my phone rang in my bag who. I pushed him and I stood up properly.

“This is wrong! I can't do this...” I was stress out. “What were we doing? Oh gosh! Hoya! Let me straight things up... You never said that you love me at the first place, you always go out with other girls. How could I accept this as a relationship? Yes, I love you, I used to! I see you went out with this and that girls, my heart is torn a part. How could I stand it? I already forget you. I only recognize you as a friend!” I said to him. He was speechless, then he found words to speak.

“Bora don't lie to me. I know you love me too, you always have. Don't deny it! Girls? I never went out with other girls?!” He yelled to me.

“Hoya! I don't deny anything. This is how I feel now! I don't see you like I used to see you. YOU ARE JUST MY FRIEND!” I yelled back to him.

“Bora! What were you talking about?!” He caught my hands and hold both of it I struggled at his hands trying to make it release from his grasp.

“Don't pretend like you don't know anything!! Firstly, you never say that you love me. Secondly, I saw you kissed Naeun, so you definitely has something with her, and Thirdly, I hate you!” I struggled more and he let go of me

“Bora let--” then I slapped him hard before he could finished his words. I just need to slap him somehow.

He stayed quiet after the slapped and I walked to the door and went inside my dorm, locked the door.

Hoya's POV

What is this feeling? My heart it hurts. I felt like it's crumpled. The pain in my cheek is merely a small pain compare with what I feel in my heart. I stayed silent, standing in front of her door for more than 5 minutes. I stayed trying to gather my soul that was lost because her. I move my head left and right checking if there anyone around. I moved my body a bit, walking to the stairs. I walked down the stairs like a drunk man, I got a blank stares, I punched everything around wall, sign, door, anything.

I didn't know that she witnessed the day Naeun kissed me and confessed to me. Was she saw all the event? I didn't kiss Naeun, she was the one who kiss me. I don't know where should I go now. Everything looks like not in its place. Maybe I should just go to the club.

Bora's POV

I went inside the dorm and cried silently, I sat on the couch until I realized that there's no one at home, my cry getting hard and hard. I can't buried it down like there is nothing happen. I wished I have my members here. I need someone's to comfort me up. I just hate being this lonely. I cried for a good 10 minutes. I wept my tears and checking my phone, my vision still blurry after the cry. I text my members, where were they? They answered saying still on the way back to the dorm. I knew them so well, they must be just went in to the car.

Because of the loneliness, I felt scared. I decided to call someone in my contact. 'Hyunseong', that name was the first one came up from my mind. I dialled his number. Not long after the dial he answered.

“Hello, Hyunseong here, what service do you need?” He asked directly.

“Hyunseong-ah, why were you.. always like that.. when I called you.” I said still sobbing a bit.

“I always said it right? When you need something just call me. I'm always ready for you 24 hours.” I giggled at his answered. “But, Bora? Were you crying?” He asked worriedly. I didn't answer him. Silent took me over, I wonder should I tell him I am crying or not. But then he said, “Ok, I know you were, then you're calling me to get me to you. That's the service you want.”

“Hyunseong-ah, it's not like that--” With that he hung up the phone. Now he's really going to the dorm.

I waited for him and he was quick. The bell rang I opened it and there Hyunseong smiling widely with a pizza and some cokes in his both hands. I gave him the look and he said.

“It's to make you feel much better.” He said, I just nodded and helped him with the cokes in his left hand.

“Hyungseong, please take a sit.” I said to him while I searched for a glass in the kitchen.

“Bora, why don't you just sit down and talk about it me?” He was waiting for my answer but then he said again, “Don't make me come and get you to sit here, Yoon Bora.” He said like a parents.

“Wait, till I found the glass. We just moved all the glasses somewhere and I forg—uufft” Then someone hug me from the back and lifted me up. I screamed, “Oh my god! Hyunseong!” He just laughed and put me down on the couch.

“Didn't I say it, right? Now let's talk about it.” He said seriously. I don't know wether I should tell him or not. “Bora..... I'm waiting.”

“Hyunseong, you should learn to be more patient.” I said to him then I added, “Oh and manner also to your Sunbae.” As always he only rolled his eyes. Well, Hyunseong it really close to me, so honorific is something that we didn't use. Then he gave me the look, asking for me to start telling the problem. “All right Hyunseong. I'll tell you. You know Hoya right?”

“Infinite?” He asked. I nodded.

“I..... I... I like him, no I love him... used to be.” Hyunseong surprised at what I said. He was ready to ask but I stopped him. “Don't ask first.” He readied himself to listen to me. “It's been a month or more since we got close. But somehow it feels like years. It's like that our personality really match each other. We got closer and closer, until suddenly... he kissed me for the first time.” Hyungseong surprised again.

“KISSED?!!” He shocked.

“Yeah, so after the kiss we were like a couple. Texting, calling, and even sometimes we're dating. But then when I visited him in his set recording their new program. I suddenly saw him kissing with Naeun.” Hyunseong looked like he didn't know Naeun, “Apink?” Then he mouthed an O. I continued, “I was miserable at that time. I wanted to protest and asked him, but then something hit me.” I stopped and looking at him. “He never said that he loves me, Hyunseong. So, I didn't have the courage to ask him. But then he ask to meet up a week later. I was going reject it but he pleaded so I agreed. We meet up and I decided to stay away a bit from him and avoid his skinship. But it's not working. I'm too in love with him. Everything seem so right when he held me in his embrace.”

“Eww Bora, you look like a teenager who's deeply in love and yet you're not a teenager ok.” He said annoyedly.

“Just listened.” I replied to him. “But then in the middle of the date I met Dongjun. I greet him happily since me and him haven't meet each other for so long. Then he asked, 'you guys going out together? Did I miss something?' I answered him 'No, we're just good friends.' Dongjun's question maked me realized that I'm letting my guard down. So, Hoya had this terrified look at me until we got to the dorm.” I memorized what was happening back then, then I felt like another tears going out. I covered my face first to let out a sob and continue slowly. “So, we.. arrived at the dorm. He.. was protesting about... why am I still considering him as his friends? And... he was mad and..... there we had a big fight and... I slapped him.” I cried at the word slap. I was hurting him.

“Bora, sshhh. Continue.” He came to me and took me into his embraced.

“I slapped him and I said that... I loved him but not anymore... after knowing him kissing with other girl.” I cried again and covered my face with my hand. Hyunseong now opened his hand to me and hugged me. He let me crying on his shoulder.

“Let it out. Cry as much as you want.” He said, I cried hard until about I don't know how long. I stopped crying but still need Hyunseong embraced. “Are you fine, now?” I nodded still hugging him and resting my head in his shoulder.

“Hyunseong..... Thanks a lot.” I said to him.

“You're welcome Bora. I'm glad that you trust me.” He said. “But..... Bora I know that I'm handsome and cute and everything that every girls would go crazy over me, but can you... let go of me, you're hugging me too tight and I can't—breathe--” I let go of him and smiled saying sorry to him.

“Sorry, I was feeling too comfortable, I guess.” I smiled sincerely.

“There, there, Bora's smile. She's back.” Hyunseond said, I just giggled. “Should we start eating pizza now?” He suggested. I nodded and we started eating.

Hyunseong always be my mood-booster but I never telling him over my secret or my problems. He always tells me if I have problems or anything just call him and he'll go right up to me. He's very kind to me that's why I don't want to take advantages of him.

But still in my heart, this pain still exist. The hole in my heart that will hard to be healed will remain. The fact of it can't be deny. The pain may not be felt but the hole will always remain there.