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Granted By: Primadonna_Angel

Title: Secrets

Author: Nubci4

Title [9.5/10]

Everyone seems to be holding secrets in your story, so I believe that your title fits very well. It's a good working title at the very least. It doesn't reveal much about the story, but at the same time it tells just enough to catch the reader's attention.

Foreword/Description [6/10]

The description is interesting. I feel that it gives a bit too much away, however. But, considering the story, this is fine. It entices the reader to read the story.

Appearance [8/10]

The appearance of your story is very smooth. It's not distracting and make it easy to read. Aside from some font changes that occur very, very seldom, the format of your story works.

Plot [9/10]

This plot is one of the most interesting that I have seen in a long time. It's not quite the most original that there is, but you've given it a new spin. You're creative with it and have made it your own.

Grammar [8/10]

Your grammar is excellent! I saw only a few minor issues that most people overlook. However, I noticed that you are planning to publish this as a book later on. You will need to know this then.

When you are addressing someone, you are supposed to put a comma before their name.

Example: In this sentence from chapter four of your story:

“Swallow your food Luhan!” I said.

You should have a comma between 'food' and 'Luhan', making the sentence look like this:

“Swallow your food, Luhan!” I said.

Publishers do take note of this. The good ones at least. And believe it or not, people have been turned away from being published for minor mistakes such as this one.

Pay close attention to your comma usage. That is the only real issue that I have found with your story.

Flow [8/10]

Your flow is good. The story is decently paced and the chapters have just enough happening in them to hold the reader's attention without giving them an overload of information. You leave just enough for the reader that makes them want to continue on.

Characterization [9/10]

Your characters... They make me attached to them. That is a very good thing in a story. If an author can get their readers attached to a character, then they have done their job correctly. You do not have more characters than is needed to progress and tell your story. You also have them develop well as your story continues. This is done very well and will help to maintain reader interest.

Comments/Enjoyment [10/10]

Overall, I give this story an 84/100. 

Your story has made it's way onto my favorites list. I'll be keeping a look out for it. I enjoyed it very much. Hwaiting on your goal of publishing this! Expect it to do well. The market for this type of novel is in high demand.