cr to @hbubbleteah on IG for the poposter 

also this is a long update - most of my updates are really long!

 

 

"Wow SarSar, you're so lucky! You get to see ChanYeol~." Kayla says - I know she's upset, she really misses Kris. 

"I know !! I'm so happy!" I try to rub it in her face. 

 

I know what you're thinking - I'm a horrible friend to do that to her. But I'm actually an amazing friend. You see, when my parents first told me they were going to Seoul for a possible hotel opening and business conferences - I immediately begged to go. They said no at first because I would be all by myself in a different country and they wouldn't be around much. Then I made the suggestion that Kayla comes with me. They were hesitant at first, but finally gave in. 

 

I called Kayla's mom and asked for her permission and told her not to tell Kayla anything. I just needed her permission that she could come to South Korea with my parents and I. She was hesitant at first as well, so I had her talk to my mom. I guess she felt a little better talking to my mom because she finally agreed! 

 

"I wish I could go! I'm so jealous." Poor thing looks like she's about to cry. 

"Aweeee, don't worry - they'll probably be back in L.A soon. For concerts or some other event and you'll see Kris then." I pat her head. 

"Why are you being so cruel, you wench?!" She gives me a dirty look. 

"Hey - be nice to me or I'll rip your plane ticket in half!" I said to her - hiding my smile.

 

It took her a while to catch what I said. 

 

"Wait..... WHAT!?!?!?" She screams - she's definitely hyperventilating. 

"You really think I would go to our dream place and not take you with me?" I shake my finger at her. 

"We'll, no - but with your parents.. Me.. My parents.. What?" She's freaking out. 

 

~~~~~~~~><~~~~~~~~

 

 

We are boarding the plane. Kayla and I look at each other and  can't help but squeal from excitement. We're flying out to another planet it seems to surprise our wonderful boys. Kayla told Kris she was going camping so she wouldn't have a phone for a couple days. While I told ChanYeol that I've started taking summer classes so, I'm quiet busy. Which doesn't really mean anything because he's so busy we barely get chances to talk to one another. 

 

Kris has already asked Kayla to be his girl. She of course immediately said yes. I am 100% sure she didn't say yes just because he's a star. She truly loves this guy for his personality. She would never stoop down to that level. 

 

On the other hand, ChanYeol hasn't asked me. And I'm okay with that. We are still getting to know each other. And it has been really difficult this past month because he's been so busy and plus the time difference. There are sometimes days where I don't hear from him. I sent him little texts here and there to let him know I'm thinking of him. Even if he doesn't reply - I know he's received them well. 

 

"OMG can you believe this!?!?" Kayla squeezes my arm as we take our seat. She gets the window seat because I'm terrified of heights and would probably die if I looked out the window. 

"I actually can't. I still feel like I'm dreaming." I lay my head on her shoulder. 

"Sleeping pill kicking in, huh" she laughs. 

"Oh yes..." I yawn. 

 

 

I fell asleep before we even took off the runway. I really hate flying so I always take a sleeping pill before I board a plane. I had weird dreams about ChanYeol. There are some side effects to sleeping pills, I guess. 

 

When I wake up from Kayla shaking me, we are landing in Tokyo Japan. We have a 2 hour layover here until we get on the plane to Seoul!!! We exit the plane and go to our next gate to wait. 

 

I turn my phone on so I could call BaekHyun to tell him we are almost in Seoul. 

 

"Hey Baeks!" I smile into the phone. 

"Heeey! Are you guys in Seoul yet?" He asks. 

"Not yet, we are in Tokyo now. I just called to let you know. " I tell him

"Great! I can't wait to see you again!" 

"Me, too! I'm so excited! Has ChanYeol detected anything yet?" I ask him. 

"He has no clue. Although Kris is kind of suspicious because Kayla all of a sudden decided to go camping at the same time you're coming here." He sounds worried that the plan will be ruined. 

"I'll call him next and try to get that idea out of his head. " I assure him. 

"Great! SuHo and Chen will meet you guys at the hotel when you arrive. Then well get rolling with the plan." He chuckles. 

"Thank you so much, Baeks! You've really been a big help!" I can't help but feel that Baeks and I are going to be great friends. 

 

Kayla looks nervous. I ask her what's wrong and she shows me her phone. There's 5 messages from Kris. 

*i miss you! Why'd you have to go camping now?..*

*kaylaaaa~ SarahAnne is coming here and you go camping... Is there something you're hiding from me?* 

*i really hope you're camping or ill be upset if you come here and didn't tell me beforehand.*

*bbaaaabbbbeeeee~ answer me...*

*ok, I'm really suspicious now...*

 

I decided to give Kris a call before we board the plane. So that he doesn't get to suspicious. 

 

 

"Hello?" Kris answers his phone. 

"Hey, Kris! I'm in Tokyo!" I sound too giddy. 

"Oh nice~ you're almost here..." There's still a hint of suspicion in his voice. 

"I know~ I'm so excited but I'd be alot more excited if Kayla was with me, but her parents just wouldn't budge. I asked them a million times.." I lie through my teeth. 

"Oh really? Why did they say no?" He asks. 

"Because its too far and they weren't going to be there - so they were worried." I keep coming up with lies. 

"Oh yeah - I guess I could understand that. I really wanted to see her." Aweeee he sounds so sad. 

"I know... You'll see her another time though..." I smile thinking (another time meaning later today!)

 

~~~~~~~><~~~~~~~

 

We finally land in Seoul! It's so beautiful. Even the airport. Kayla and I are fangirling over the airport. It's unreal - it still feels like we're dreaming. We make our way out of the airport and there's a black limo waiting for us. Kayla, myself and my parents all get in and go towards our hotel. 

 

"Are you girls excited to explore South Korea?" My dad asks with a smile on his face. 

"We are ecstatic, dad!" I give him a big hug!

"Just don't run off to weird places. We'll have someone with you girls If you'd like.." My wonderful father offers. 

"It's ok Mr. Johnson, the members of EXO are going to show us around." Kayla explains. 

"Yes, dear, but they're stars so they can't go everywhere with you." My mom chimes in.   

 

That made Kayla and I question if that's what's really gonna happen. Are we even going to be able to hang out with them? Will we get to spend time with the rest of EXO? Because they have been extremely busy with everything that we barely get to talk to them on the phone. 

 

~~~~~~~><~~~~~~

 

Kayla and I are sharing a room. As we are unpacking our things there's a faint knock on the door. 

 

"Room service." A males voice comes through. 

 

 

Room service? We didn't order anything. Kayla decided to go tell the guy that we didn't order any room service. When she opens the door, she squeals a happy squeal. 

 

I run over to see what all the commotion is all about and I'm greeted by arms wrapping around me!

 

"SarahAnne! You're here!!" Baeks screams. 

"Can't...breath..." I choke for air from the tight hug. 

"Haha, sorry I just got too excited!" He pulls away. 

"It's okay.. I'm so happy to see you! I thought Chen was coming! Oh hey SuHo!" I give SuHo a hug. 

"He's here - he just ran into an old friend down at the lobby, he'll be up shortly." SuHo says and smiles his gorgeous smile. 

"I just really wanted to come, too." BaekHyun explains. 

"I'm glad you did! It's so nice to see you again!" I give him another hug. 

"Hey hey hey!~" another sweet voice says. 

"Chen!" Both Kayla and I say excitedly.  

 

We sit around our hotel room and talk about what and how we're going to do the surprise. 

We come up with our final decision. I'm going to go back to a broadcasting station with them and surprise ChanYeol in their waiting room - while their manager takes Kayla to their dorm so she could surprise Kris. Perfect. 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~><~~~~~~~~~~~

 

I could tell SarahAnne was waiting for me to kiss her, she kept in her breath and waiting for it to happen. So, I kept teasing her just a little while longer. 

 

"Me, t-" I interrupt her words. I couldn't take it anymore. Her lips were calling out to me, and her pouting wasn't helping either. I needed to taste her. I could feel everything she wanted to say through that kiss. God, I've missed her. 

 

I slightly pull back to let her catch her breath and so I could catch mine as well. I'm still looking into her eyes. I feel like there's so many untold stories behind those beautiful green eyes. A smile creeps upon my face. 

 

"Your eyes are green..." 

"They change color - depending on my mood or the lighting." She chuckles. 

"What mood are you in that they're green?" I ask her and peck her lips again. 

"Happy." She simply says. 

 

 

We sit down and talk for a while. We have a lot of catching up to do, but it's time for me to go perform on stage. I give her another kiss and tell her that I'd be right back. 

 

Even though I've been performing for a while - I still get stage fright. But today, it was a different kind of feeling - I didn't think about the audience - I didn't think about the lighting - I didn't think about the cameras. I only thought of SarahAnne.  The performance was great. No mistakes. No voice cracklings. Just perfect. Everyone seemed in such a good mood. 

 

When we got done with our performance - they told us Seungri was going to share our waiting room since we were runner up for 1st place. Seungri. SarahAnne is a huge BigBang fan. I wonder how she is going to react. 

 

 

We all walk into the waiting room and I see she has prepared lunch for all of us. Even though she looks exhausted from the flight - she still took the time to prepare us and our staff lunch. 

 

"You didn't have to do this..." I say to her as I grab her into a hug. 

"It's no big deal, you guys are so tired - it's the least I could do. " she says with a smile. 

 

The rest of my members thank and hug SarahAnne. Baeks is looking at me and motioning for me to tell her about Seungri. 

 

"So, SarahAnne... Are you still a BigBang fan?" I ask her. 

"Of course I am. Just because I'm hanging out with you, doesn't mean I've given up my loyalty to them." She giggles. 

"Just don't fangirl too hard." Baeks teases her.

"What do you me-" her eyes open wide. 

 

~~~~~~~><~~~~~~~

 

I'm frozen. I've died and gone to heaven. Was I saint in my previous life that all of these wonderful things are happening to me?!?!

 

I was wondering why ChanYeol asked if I was still a BigBang fan when.... SEUNGRI WALKED INTO THE WAITING ROOM!!! 

 

"Hey hyung! Your performance was amazing!" Kai tells Seungri. 

"Oh thanks! You guys killed the stage! Scary rookies you are!" He hugs Kai. 

"Oh hi, I'm Seungri." He holds his hand out to me. 

 

I'm still in shock. ChanYeol has his hand over my shoulder - thank god - because if he didn't I would have fallen over. 

"H-h-hi, I'm SarahAnne." My hands shaking I grab his hand. 

"Nice to meet you. Sorry if I sound rude, but who are you?" He asks. 

"SarahAnne." I reply. My voice is too high pitched. 

"Haha, I got that ~ are you a coordi?" He asks while laughing. 

"No, hyung. This is my girlfriend." ChanYeol says. Girlfriend!?!?! Since when? He's never asked me to be his girlfriend!

"Oh wow! She's pretty, Chan! Good job!" He winks at ChanYeol. 

 

 

Everyone's eyes are on ChanYeol and I. I can feel my cheeks heating up and I know I'm blushing hardcore. For once, ChanYeol just called me his girlfriend. And second - IM IN THE SAME ROOM AS SEUNGRI! 

 

"She may be ChanYeols girlfriend, but she's a BigBang fan" Baeks teases. Everyone starts laughing and ChanYeols grip on my shoulder tightens. 

"Oh really!?!" Seungri turns around towards us again.   

"Yeah... I've been a VIP for 5 years now..." I say blushing. I just want to hide behind ChanYeol. 

"Wow that's great! Am I your bias?" Seungri asks smiling. 

"Haha, I like you a lot, but DaeSung is my bias." I say and shift a little closer to ChanYeol. 

Everyone starts laughing at my comment and Seungri blushes. 

 

 

ChanYeol didn't let go of me once. I could tell he was a little uncomfortable with Seungri being there and his group being my bias. So to not make him feel bad, I stayed by his side the whole time. I even stole a few pecks from him when no one was looking. 

 

I got to know the rest of EXO a little better and Seungri. He really is a funny one. The waiting room was always booming with laughter because of Seungri's funny jokes. 

 

It was time for them to go back out on stage and see who got 1st place. There was a TV in the waiting room so I could see them. As they're showing the results ~ the camera rolls over to ChanYeol ~ and he looked straight into it. I felt like he was looking at me and I blushed all by myself. The results are in...... Drrdrrddrrdrrddrrmmmm *drum roll*

 

EXO WINS ANOTHER ONE!! 

 

They're all so happy and Seungri happily congratulates them. They give their speech and when the encore starts - they keep their promise to their fans and grab SuHo to throw him into the air~ it was the cutest thing I've ever seen in the world. 

 

They all come rushing into the waiting room. All of EXO, and a couple more idol stars that I've been a fan of. I'm in awe. There's cameras everywhere recording their happy celebration. 

 

I don't see ChanYeol anywhere... I give EXO hugs and congratulate them... Everyone is so happy that I kind of feel I'm invading their space. I make my way to the door and walk out. 

 

I see ChanYeol talking to someone. I'm about to go over to him until I saw who he was talking to. Sulli. I stay away. I don't want to interrupt. Then they get really close to each other and someone takes their pic. I'm not really the jealous type... But seeing that - felt like a dagger stabbed my heart. They talk for a couple more mins and he starts walking towards the waiting room. He doesn't even see me sitting on the bench a little further down. 

 

Are they an item?... Am I being played? But he called me his girlfriend in front of Seungri... I feel tears well up... I don't know what to do or where to go. I'm in a foreign country. I take my phone out and was about to call Kayla when I hear someone call my name. I quickly try to wipe my eyes and put a smile on my face...

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~><~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

I walk into the waiting room and I don't see SarahAnne anywhere...

 

"Hyung... Where's SarahAnne?" I ask XiuMin. 

"I saw her walk outside - she looked uncomfortable." He explains feeling guilty. 

 

I walk out again and see her sitting on the bench. How did I not see her before? I'm about to walk to her when I notice a tear run down her face... Why is she crying? Oh no... Did she see me take a pic with Sulli and got the wrong idea?

 

"SarahAnne...." I call out her name...

 

She quickly wipes her face and turns towards me with a smile. Is she trying to act in front of me?

 

"What's wrong baby?" I sit next to her as I put my arm around her. 

"Nothing... Why would something be wrong?" Her voice is shaky. 

"SarahAnne... Don't lie to me..." I pull her closer to me... She's resisting it seems.  

"Congratulations on winning first place!" She tries to change the subject. 

"Thank you, but stop trying to change the subject." I grab her shoulders so she's facing me. 

"I'm not... Really. I'm just tired. It's 3am in L.A.  Jet lag." She faintly smiles. 

 

I let it go for now...I don't want to stress her out. I walk back into the waiting room with her. She wants to say bye to everyone before I drive her back to her hotel room. 

 

We get into the car and she face palms herself. 

 

"What's wrong?" I ask her.

"We can't go to the hotel... We have to go back to your dorm. Kayla is there... She's surprising Kris." She says with a worried look. 

"Haha, you girls love surprises huh?" I laugh. 

 

We turn around and head toward our dorm. So, since there's always fans in front of our dorms - I always keep disguises in my car. SarahAnne wears my beanie and hoodie. While I wear a cap, a face-mask and a bigger zip up hoodie. We have to be really sneaky so we don't get caught. 

 

I park a little down the street. We start walking towards the dorm and a bunch of fans get up and quickly sit back down. "It's not them" I hear one of them say. Thank God they have no idea. As we're getting closer I get more nervous. I put my hand over SarahAnne's shoulder and put my head down just in case. 

 

 

 

Phew. We made it in without being noticed. 

 

"Are they always out there?" SarahAnne asks. 

"Pretty much." I tell her. 

"Wow, that must really you guys have no privacy whatsoever." She seems worried.

"Yeah, I know. I don't think I'll ever get used to someone always following me." I tell her. 

"If you ever want to get away. Just come to L.A ~" she smiles. 

 

 

It seems like she's loosening up again. I'll ask her later why she was crying earlier. 

 

"SURPRISE!!" Kayla screams as soon as we turn the lights on. 

"Oh - it's just you two." She looks so disappointed. 

"Haha, thanks." SarahAnne pretends to be hurt. 

 

She walks over and hugs both SarahAnne and I. She looks so tired. We sit there and talked for about an hour. Kayla was so nervous the whole time. Then we heard the buzzer - which meant they were on their way up. We hide Kayla upstairs in Kris' room. 

They all barge in and they all look irritated and Baeks is cursing under his breath. 

 

"Oh hey - what are you two doing here?" Luhan asks. 

"We decided to spend some alone time together." I tell Luhan. 

 

He comes over and sits on the couch with SarahAnne and I. 

"You look exhausted." SarahAnne says looking at Luhan. 

"You have no idea, and coming home and not being able to get in for 20 mins because fans are swarming you doesn't help either." Luhan says frustrated. 

 

Kris is the last to walk in. As soon as he walks in SarahAnne and I look at each other and think of ways to get him to go to his room. He usually takes a 30 min shower and then hangs out in the kitchen before he goes to bed. 

 

"Hyung - can you do me a favor?" I ask him. 

"Why are you here? Hey SarahAnne." He looks irritated. 

"Hey, Kris. You look exhausted. You should go to sleep." She says. 

"I got to take a shower first. What's your favor, Chan?" He says as he yawns. 

"Can you please go and get my guitar out of your room, I want to play for SarahAnne." I ask hoping he does it. 

"What am I? Your personal butler. Get it yourself." He gives me a look. 

"Hyuuunngggg please! Saranghae bbuing!" I try aegyo - 

"Arghhh you're frustrating." He says as he walks up to his room. 

 

 

We all stop moving and talking and waiting for what was going to happen next. 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~><~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

I'm so tired and frustrated. These fans really need to understand the meaning of privacy. All I want to right now is hear Kayla's voice and sleep. 

 

Seeing ChanYeol and SarahAnne earlier really made me sad. I wanted to hug and kiss Kayla. But her parents didn't let her come this far away. 

 

I walk into the dorm and saw that SarahAnne and ChanYeol were there. I thought he was taking her to her hotel room. I guess they couldn't part ways. I don't blame them. 

 

When I'm about to go shower ChanYeol asks me to get his guitar. If SarahAnne wasn't here I would have told him to get lost, but I had to show manners. 

 

I walk into my room and was about to grab the guitar when someone grabs me in a hug from behind. I freaked out because I thought a fan had broken in into our dorm. So I immediately push the intruder off of me and was about to go off when I looked at the shocked look on her face. 

 

"OH MY GOD KAYLA!!" I scream. 

"Kris..." She's still in shock. 

 I run over to her and pick her up the floor and hug her. 

"I'm so sorry I thought you were an intruder." I feel so bad and hug her tighter. 

"It's okay, sorry I scared you..." Her voice is shaky and she hugs me back. 

 

Everyone comes upstairs and sees us hugging. 

 

"Did you think I would come here and not bring your wonderful girlfriend along?" SarahAnne laughs. 

 

I break away from the hug and bring Kayla to my side. 

"You really got me. I had no idea!" I squeeze Kayla and smile at SarahAnne. 

"Aren't our girlfriends amazing." ChanYeol says with a cheesy smile. 

"You asked SarahAnne to be your girlfriend?!" Kayla asks/screams. 

"Well, no, but I hope she's okay with me telling everyone she is." He looks down at SarahAnne and she looks sad.

 

Hmmm, I wonder why. I notice Kayla and SarahAnne exchange looks. I'd have to ask Kayla about that later. 

 

Everyone leaves the room to give Kayla and I some privacy. 

"Don't do anything erted." Tao says as he's walking out. 

 

I throw a pillow at him as he closes the door and sticks his tongue out at me. 

 

We just sit there for a while hugging. I can't believe she's in my arms. I have missed her so much. Is it possible for her to look even more beautiful than the first time I saw her? With every passing minute I fall deeper and deeper in love with her. 

 

"I love you." I can't help but say those words out loud to her. 

"And I love you, Kris." She smiles and looks up at me. My heart skips a beat. She's so breathtaking. I lean in closer to her. 

"I've missed you so much..." I say and I kiss her softly. 

She pulls away from the kiss and says "I've missed you more" and kisses me again. 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~><~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kayla and Kris looked so happy together. I'm so happy for them. 

 

ChanYeol called me his girlfriend again. What is up with him telling everybody I'm his girlfriend except for me? And don't think I've forgotten about earlier. Him and Sulli taking a picture together and seeming so close. 

 

"What are you thinking about.." ChanYeol asks as he pokes my forehead. 

Everyone is spread out all over the living room. Some sleeping, some eating and some watching tv.

"How 2 months ago, never would I have thought I'd be watching tv in EXO's dorm. How I'd never meet a member of BigBang. How I'd never be here sharing these moments with you." I say. 

He smiles down at me and then his smile disappears...

"Can you tell me the truth now?" He says out of nowhere. 

"Truth about what?" I ask and raise my eyebrows. 

"About earlier at the broadcasting station." He says "I saw you crying, SarahAnne, and don't tell me you were tired. Just tell me the truth. I want to be able to comfort you." He puts his hand around my shoulder. 

"I saw you..." I finally said after a couple silent minutes. 

"Saw me what?" He asks confused. Men. Always pretending to be innocent. 

"With Sulli, ChanYeol." I'm getting annoyed. 

"Ok... I thought that's why you were acting like that." He says. I just look at him waiting for him to continue. 

"It's nothing what you think, babe, I promise. She's from the same company and she just came to congratulate us on our win." He explains. But I still feel weird. 

"Why did she only congratulate you and not come in the waiting room like everyone else." I asked. That seemed to get him thinking. 

"I know she congratulated everyone on stage, but I don't know why she didn't come in the waiting room. But I promise you it's nothing more." He looks at me. 

" ok." I reply and snuggle up to him. Even though I still have this weird feeling, I believe that ChanYeol really isn't doing anything behind my back. 

"Babe..." He pulls me out of my thoughts. 

"Hmmm?"

"Can you come up to my room with me real quick." He asks blushing. 

I panic. What? Why? 

"Uhm...." Was all I could manage. 

"Haha, stop thinking erted things." He teases and I immediately blush.

"IM NOT!" I said too quickly. 

 

 

 

We walk up to his room and walk in. Wow, for a guy his room is really neat. We sit down on his bed and he turns and faces me. I could see he's thinking hard about something. 

 

"I know I don't have much time left with you. I know we won't see each other as often as we'd like. I know we won't always be able to talk everyday. I know this is really difficult for you. And myself. I know all of the risks I'm taking. I know all of these things, but I still don't see enough reason behind them to stop me from being with you. SarahAnne, I want to be with you. Forever. I know it may seem silly that I'm making such a confession without fully knowing you. I know it may sound crazy to you, but I've never felt like this in my life." 

I feel tears coming on as I listen to his deep voice fill my ears. 

"When I think about you, I feel as if every struggle I'm going through at the moment disappears. You make me feel good about myself, you make me happy. You make me forget about all the bad things in the world. I've been having a really hard time lately, but having you in my life makes it a little easier. SarahAnne.... What I'm trying to get at is... I know I've said this a few times today, but I never properly asked you... Would you be mine?" He takes my hands into his and looks me straight in the eyes. 

"It doesn't sound silly or crazy. At first it did... To me. I thought why am I thinking this way when I just met this guy. No one has ever caught my attention as you did, ChanYeol. I think about you every waking moment. You're the last person I think of before I sleep and the first when I wake up. Yes, you have said it a few times. And it hurt my feelings that you didn't even ask me. But now that you are.... Of course ill be yours. Always." I lean in into his chest and he wraps his arms around me.