Inklings

I Won't Say I'm In Love

Taeyeon’s POV

“I’m home.” I hollered as I took off my shoes near the doormat and threw my backpack on the floor. I let my feet slip into my slippers and closed the door. I exhaled deeply, placing my hands on my protruding belly to prevent the insane amount of food that I previously consumed from bouncing around. I over indulged on an ‘All-You-Can-Eat’ buffet which upset my stomach, but it was all worth it. After all, I got to spend time with Tiffany.

I heard the rustling of feet and the clanking of plates coming from another room.  I walked over to the source of the noise, curious to who or what I would encounter.  While scanning my surroundings, a body collided into my own. “Sorry!” I said hurriedly, bowing my head in frustration.

The person before me chuckled in response. “It’s okay Taeyeon.”  I raised my head and discovered my father.  He was slightly taller than me and wore glasses which were an official trademark of this family. “Welcome home,” he greeted me as he walked out of the kitchen with a heaping plate of food.

“Where is mom?” I asked as I walked over to the dining table.

“Your mom is tending to our family shop right now. She'll be back in a few hours.” He said as set his meal on the table. I pulled out his chair for him to sit in. He looked at me and smiled.  “Why thank you. That’s very sweet of you.” He said while proceeding to sit down in his spot and start eating.

“You’re welcome. Do you need anything else Dad?” I warmly smiled back as I started to leave the dining room.

“I’d like some water please.”  He coughed.

“One water coming up!” I chuckled. I walked into the kitchen, placed my hand on the cabinet door, and pulled a glass cup out of the cupboard.  “Do you want ice in your water?” I asked while making my way to the fridge.

“Yes please.” He mumbled through his food.

I walked back into the dining room and placed a glass filled with ice cubes and water next to my father’s plate. “Here you go. Do you need anything else before I go to my room?”

He nodded his head and motioned me with his hand, telling me to sit down at the table. As I pulled my chair out and took my seat, he swallowed his food and asked, “How was your outing with Tiffany?”

A heavy sigh escaped my lips which raised an eyebrow on my father’s face. In noticing this I quickly put a smile on my face and said, “It was good. We ate a lot at the buffet. I’m super full.”

He slouched into his seat, giving me skeptical looks. I tried to veer my gaze away from him, occasionally looking at him hoping that he wouldn’t suspect anything.  I prayed that could have fooled him a little because I didn’t really feel like talking about the outing I had with Tiffany, but my dad was a tough cookie to crack. No one could trick him. Not one bit. When I was younger I remember that he told me had this special gift where he could read and exploit other peoples’ emotions very well, especially when it came to his children.

A tiny smile formed on my face when the memories of a young rambunctious Taeyeon would pummel the neighborhood bullies from hurting her friends and family. When father found out what young Taeyeon had done she would try to justify her actions by saying things like: ‘They were hurting my friends. I had to do something about it,’ or ‘You don’t understand Dad! They messed with my siblings. If the bullies mess with them they mess with me’. If that didn’t work then she pretended to be a perfect little angel in front of her father in order to not get in trouble, but to no avail. The young Taeyeon got reprimanded anyway by her father for her courageous, but foolish actions. A light laugh left my lips as I reminisced about my childhood and how I thought I could fool my father by hiding my emotions or actions. Another laugh escaped my lips because to this day I still get scolded my by father and still get myself into troublesome circumstances. Maybe I just cared for people that I cherished way too much for my own good that I forget about myself. I had an inkling that someday that philosophy would lead to my own downfall.

“What’s so funny?” My father questioned, his loud voice snapping me out of my thoughts.

“Nothing Dad,” I said shaking my head. “I’m just thinking. Don’t worry about it.”

“Okay, well… What happened between you and Tiffany?” He asked, correctly guessing my suppressed emotions.

“Nothing bad happened, but I noticed something off about her and I don’t really want to talk about it.” I bluntly stated. “I don’t think it’s my place and my business to do so.”

After a moment of silence my father sighed as he leaned his body forward and placed his hands on table, his fingers intertwined. “That proves you're trustworthy Taeyeon." he smiled. I smiled back at him. "Did she pay for you?” My father asked, continuing his avalanche of questions.

I lowered my head in shame.  I heard a content huff coming from my father. I looked over to him with a confused look on my face.  “Is it a good thing that she paid for me?”

“I just didn’t expect that she would.” He grinned. “People these days are stingy with their money, especially teenagers.”

“Aren’t adults just as greedy?” I poised.

“Yeah, you have a point Taeyeon. Humans are just selfish creatures.” My dad huffed.

I nodded, realizing how serious the conversation became. The atmosphere that hovered over us felt extremely heavy.  “What were we talking about again?” I said to lighten the mood.

“Oh, silly me”, my father facepalmed his forehead, which helped to loosen the seriousness of the previous aura surrounding us. “I’m always going off into such strange topics. Sorry Taeyeon.”

“It’s okay.” I giggled. “Well about the whole payment thing, I think that Tiffany was returning the favor when I paid for them when we all went bowling.”

“Them? Who else did you pay for? Was it Leeteuk? Another boy?” he looked at me in shock.

“You ask so many questions Dad.” I shook my head tiredly. “Leeteuk and I broke up remember? He’s going into the army soon. “

“Oh,” my father said embarrassed. “Well, I liked Leeteuk. He was good to you. I hope one day you find a good partner like him.”

“A partner?” I said with a hint of confusion. “What do you mean by that?”

He waved his hand, dismissing my question. “It doesn’t matter. You shouldn’t be dating at this day in age anyway.” He looked into the distance and closed his eyes to add to the theatricality of his actions. “You teenagers don’t know love even when it hits you,” he sighed. “It hits you right here,” he placed his hand over his chest. “Right here in the heart.”

“Dad,” I groaned. “Where are you going with this?”

He looked at me strangely and smiled, “Nowhere actually.” I swear that I could hear a hint of sarcasm in his voice, but I dismissed it. My father continued on. “I was just rambling Taeyeon. Anyway, who did you pay for?”

“I paid for Sunny and Tiffany.” I stated.

My father ran a hand through his short black hair. “Who is Sunny?”

“Sunny is a friend of Tiffany’s and mine. There were no boys with us, it was just us three.” I reassured him.

“Ah, I see. That’s good.”  He seemed content with my answers. I took this as my cue to leave.  Suddenly my father grabbed my wrist. “Whoa, hold on. I want to talk with you. We haven’t talked in a while. I miss you Taeyeon.”

Even though I was feeling tired and reluctant to talk with him and eager to crash into my bed to get some shut eye, I chose to slump back into my chair. “I miss you too Dad.” I attempted to smile despite how fatigued I was. “You owe me though.”

He lightheartedly chuckled at me as he ruffled my hair with his hand, “Whatever Taeyeon.”

“What do you want to talk about?” I asked him while attempting to fix the tangled mess resting on my scalp.

“When are you inviting Tiffany over?” he asked eagerly. “Your mom and I are excited to meet her.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at him. “I invited her over for dinner on Saturday at six o’clock. She’s excited to meet you guys too.”

“Just for dinner Taeyeon?” he pouted. “Why don’t you also invite her to sleepover for the weekend?”

My face lit up at his request. “Wait a minute. Are you serious?”

He nodded his head.  “I am very serious. Your Mom wouldn’t mind if she did either. In fact, I think it would be a good idea to introduce her to your younger sister as well. As a growing toddler, she needs to be exposed to new people.”

"Wow,” was all I could say. I was speechless.

He lightly chuckled at my reaction. “I suggest that you have Tiffany come over for dinner on tomorrow instead of Saturday so then she can spend the night.”

“All this for Tiffany?” I was shocked; actually I was elated with joy. “You put a lot of thought into this Dad.” I smiled.

He grinned in satisfaction. “Well, you know that I don’t like your brother's friends very much. It’s nice to finally meet new people that I approve of.”

“You’re so harsh to him you know that?” I laughed.

“Well I don’t like them Taeyeon. Your brother is a good kid, but his friends are not my cup of tea.” He scanned his surroundings, hoping that my brother wasn’t around to hear what he spouted. After he sighed in relief he looked into my eyes with utmost seriousness.  He leaned in a bit closer, his gaze reeling me in. “When Tiffany comes over,” he whispered loud enough for me to hear, “you might have to keep her away from him.”

I slapped my father on the shoulder and shouted, “Yah, Dad! That’s so gross. Please, don’t mention that ever again.”

My father brought his hand to soothe out the throbbing pain in his shoulder. He pretended to wince at the touch. “Well your brother is a hormonal teenage boy. Who knows what he’ll do? I’m just trying to warn you when Tiffany comes over.”

I quickly rose out of my seat, shuddering at thought of my brother making a move on Tiffany. “I don’t need the mental image Dad.” I groaned.  In fact, I was disgusted. “I’ll make sure that never happens.” I said as I turned away from the table and made my way to my room.

“Where are you going?” he asked.  I turned back around to see my father looked at me quizzically. It seemed that he wasn’t finished with his barrage of questions and his insistent talking, but I was.

“I’m going to go to bed now. I’m really tired.” I yawned as I outstretched my arms expressing my exhaustion.

“Alright Taeyeon,” he said disappointingly as he rose out of his seat. “It was nice talking to you.  Thank you for staying up with me. We'll talk more, hopefully soon. Goodnight.”

“You’re welcome. Goodnight Dad.” I said as I let my outstretched arms slowly embrace him. “I love you.”

He reciprocated the caring action and proceeded to kiss me on the forehead. “I love you too Taeyeon. Goodnight.” he said sweetly.

As we released each other from each other’s embrace I went to my room while my dad took his plate to the sink. After I closed the door the whole house was immersed in silence. While I got myself situated my room I thought about the brunette being welcomed into our home and embracing her into our family. My heart warmed up knowing that Tiffany was going to come over and spend some quality time with my folks who loved her to death even though they haven’t met her yet and me who still was unsure of my feelings. Either way, we were all excited for our very important guest to arrive at our doorstep.

A smiled started to form on my face. I was very excited to have Tiffany come over and spend the night. What were we going to do? What would we do?  What should we do? As many questions rushed through my head I crashed onto my bed and stared at the patterns on my ceiling. My mind slowly started to calm down after staring at the formations it made. I could feel my eyes becoming extremely heavy from the lack of sleep I had been receiving.  Before I rested my eyes for the night I looked over to the clock and the time read ’12:09 AM’. I couldn’t help but let a little smile from across my face in knowing that a certain brunette girl was going to visit later in the day.  I let out one more yawn before I let my body fall into slumber. Thank goodness that today was Friday.

---

“Hey, Tiffany!” I shouted as I ran up to her after we finished our session of detention.

The brunette covered her ears and winced at my boisterous voice. “Hey, watch your voice Taeng! Do you know how loud you actually are?”

“Sorry about that.” I apologized.

“You should be.” She cutely retorted, sticking her tongue out at me.

I crossed my arms in front of my chest and pouted. “Fany, don’t be like that.”

“Don’t be like what?” She placed her hands on her hips.

I playfully shoved her shoulder with the palm of my hand. “Like that.”

“And why shouldn’t I act like that?” The brunette teased.

I reached for her hands and latched my fingers around her own. “Because, it’s a special day today.”

“What’s so special about today Taengoo?” She cutely scrunched up her face.

I captured her hands into my own and said, “Today is our last day of detention Tiffany! We should celebrate.”

“What do you have in mind?” She inquired.

A satisfied expression appeared on my face. “Why don’t we have dinner at my house?”

“I thought that I was going to have dinner with your family on Saturday?” The athletic girl questioned.

“My family changed their minds. They want to see you today and they would like for you to sleepover.” I emphasized the last few words.

“What?” Tiffany said with shocked eyes. “Are you serious Taeyeon?”

“You think I’m kidding?” I laughed. “Why would I be joking about this?”

“I just never expected it.” She ran her hand through her hair in disbelief. “It’s all so sudden.”

I smiled at her. “I didn’t expect it either, but I’m glad that it did.”

We gazed into each other’s eyes, her warm, welcoming brown orbs eliciting a rush of excitement down my spine. My body shivered at the foreign sensation. I wasn’t used to this feeling, but that didn’t mean that I wasn’t open to it. The way Tiffany looked at me made me feel special. Just by looking into her eyes made me feel like I was different.

“Let’s go then.” She said excitingly as she dragged me towards her car.

We got inside the car while clicking our seatbelts in and settling into our seats. Tiffany inserted the key into the ignition, turned it, and the engine started to roar. I turned my head towards her and sent her a smile. She looked over to me and raised her hand to pinch my cheek.  A rush of heat accumulated around my face, and then the temperature in the car rose. Mind me, that the heater in the car wasn’t either. I averted my eyes away from Tiffany as a light chuckled escaped my mouth. “You’re so cute.” I heard her say which made my heart start to pound against my chest.

I placed my hand over my cheek that Tiffany pinched. “Thank you. You can say the same thing about yourself.” I replied, trying not to stutter and slur my words together. She warmly smiled, her attention fixed upon the road before us. As we kept on driving, I realized that she was heading in the direction to where my house was located. It was odd of her to do so because we could have gotten her things at her house, then go to my own. I raised the question and she looked over with a subtle, but a noticeable sullen expression. I bit my lip in hesitation. Did I say something wrong again?

A rush of confusion and fluster started to contort my face, which Tiffany noticed. She grinned weakly and said, “I have a few errands to run which is why I’m dropping you off first. After I’m done, I’ll go over to your place. Is that okay with you Taeyeon?”

I nodded my head in response, however I wasn't content with the outcome. Curiosity replaced my frustrations. I was suspicious as to why I couldn't tag along with Tiffany. The brunette turned to look at me, patted the top of my head with her hand, then she placed it back on the steering wheel, putting her attention towards the road forgetting that these subtle things ever happened. The muscles in my face pushed and pulled the corners of my lips in response to Tiffany's actions, but they ceased when I heard the car's engine shut off and unclicking of both seatbelts. I turned my head and to my dismay I saw that we were in front of my house. I looked back to face the brunette and said, "We're home already?"

She nodded her head. "Yep, but you don't have to worry. I'll be right back." Tiffany stuck her pinky out in my direction. I silently chuckled at her and returned her friendly gesture by interlocking my pinky with her own.

"Promise?" I asked.

The bright-eyed brunette nodded her head. "Promise. I'll be back."

"Okay. I trust you." I smiled as I got out of the car, pulling away from her warm hands. As I safely landed on the pavement, I closed the car door and waved goodbye as she pulled out of the driveway. 

As the car disappeared in the distance, I made my way to the front door of my house. I grabbed the handle off the door and before I turned the knob thoughts of a sullen Tiffany rushed through my mind. I stood there on my porch, my feet glued to the ground for a couple of minutes while thinking about what Tiffany was up to. There was a reason why Tiffany didn't let me go with her. An eerie inkling came over me causing my body to shiver in discomfort. Goosebumps started to creep and crawl over my body. "I hope that you'll be back Tiffany. I'm worried about you." I whispered for my ears to hear. My chest started to ache and I could feel my arm start to tremble, which was odd. I looked down at my hand and saw that I gripped the doorknob too tightly, quietly unleashing my frustrations.

I tried to shake the thought and the pain away from me because tonight and for the next few days, I needed to focus on preparing my eventful weekend with Tiffany. 

I turned the knob and entered my house. To my surprise I saw my family already prepping for our very important guest coming tonight.

"Hello Taeyeon!" My family greeted me happily.

"Hello Mom! Hello Dad! Hello Jinwoong!" I responded. "How is Hayeon?"

My mother set the plates down on the table and walked over in my direction. She outstretched her arms and wrapped them around me. "Hayeon is sleeping. I missed you Taeyeon."

I wrapped my arms around my mother and replied, "I missed you too Mom. I was only gone for ten hours."

"Ten hours is too long." She laughed. "I'm glad that detention week is over."

"I learned my lesson. No more skipping class. I promise." I chuckled.

"Good." My mother smiled. She pulled away from me and placed her hands on my shoulders. "When is Tiffany coming over?"

"Around six." I said.

"Well, it's already five o'clock." My mother stated. "Will she be here on time? I would love to see her."

I nodded my head. "She'll be here. She just had to get her stuff at her house and run some last minute errands."

"Alright Taeyeon." My mother smiled, taking her hands of my shoulders and letting them swing at her sides. "It's been a while since we've had visitors you know?"

"I know Mom." I said.

"This is going to be very interesting Taeyeon." My mother laughed. "This is going to be so much fun for you and for our family. I'm so excited." I laughed at my mother's enthusiasm. Seeing my family so happy about meeting my cute little mushroom, I couldn't help but feel joyous. My family was excited to meet someone I truly care about.

I started to walk towards my room and said to my mother, "I'll go clean then."

"Good idea." My mother agreed. "When you're done help me with dinner okay?"

"Okay!" I reassured my mother.

I entered my room and closed my door. I scanned my surroundings and decided that this room was clean enough. I was tired out from detention. I sauntered over to my bed and plopped onto it, face first. As I let the bed mold to the curves of my body, I stretched out every knot and tangle in my muscles. 

I turned my body around, my eyes staring at the patterns on my ceiling. My mind made all kinds of figures and shapes out of it. I couldn't help but laugh when my mind made a picture of Tiffany out of the dots on the ceiling. I still couldn't believe that the mushroom was coming over tonight and spending the whole weekend with my family and me. 

This weekend was going to be very interesting.

Very interesting indeed.

And I couldn't wait to immerse myself in every single minute of it with her.

 

 

 


Author's Note:

Sorry for the wait guys! I truly apologize. I'm very busy with school, clubs, and other extra-curricular activities. Please understand. Thank you!

It took me a while to write this chapter and it will probably take me a while to write the next one because of school.

Thank you for waiting! I truly appreciate it. :)

I love all of you. Thank you for sticking with me and this story.

What's the "Song of the Chapter" for today?

Hmm...

Here!

"Aruarian Dance" by Nujabes: http://youtu.be/g9hwjQBQFIo

This song is very calming. Its set that mood of relaxation.

Taeyeon's brother played a little snippet of the song on her instagram and it's from the anime Samurai Champloo.

Thank you guys again for patiently waiting! I am grateful for all of you readers. I love you all. <3

Sincerely,

PandaJR :D

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Comments

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wahidah1975
#1
Chapter 17: It sad...fany life...hope you update soon authorshi
St-renaissance
#2
Chapter 2: There are many characters as well ??
St-renaissance
#3
Chapter 2: Liking this so far
Kiyumi #4
Chapter 17: anniyo authorshii... HEehehe Im Still Here to cheer you up.. and support your story.. hehehe
keep Fighting Authorshii.. hehehe
krystalhasna #5
Chapter 16: don't worry autor we will wait for you!!!!!!!
but can hyou please update one last time before you go please autor we wanna know what happened next !!!
troublemaker92 #6
Chapter 15: Im curios~ what happen to fany's past? Can you tell us when you update author shi? Update soon
kwonyoonji
#7
Author-nim, you are a great author. :)
And I freakin love your story line ♥.♥
A-YoGG
#8
Chapter 15: I dunno what to say hmmmm lol but im excited for the next chaptah :") update sooon^o^