I walk to the door with light heart and huge smile on my face. These are happiest days in my life so far. Marrying Jiyong is something that I've always dreamt of. I can't even believe my bravery to asked him. I smile as I open the door, not peeping through the glass first like I usually do. I don't know why I don't peep today, maybe I'm just being too happy to forget.

My smile vanishes as soon as the door opens. I freeze, not knowing what to do. My mom is standing there, looks furious. I want to greet her but nothing comes out from my mouth. Instead I gasp and drive my mom mad, "Ya, can't you even greet your mom?"

I'm about to open my mouth when Jiyong calls my name. My heart stops and I turn pale. Mom looks even more furious than she already has, and she glares at me. "So I see you're living alone with him, Seunghyun-ah."

Jiyong bows awkwardly to my mom and invites her to come inside. She glares at Jiyong as she walks to the couch. She sits down in silent and looks around our apartment, I believe she must be evaluating it. She does that every time she's visiting someone else's house. She always think her house is the best and everyone else's always lacking.

She shakes her head several times and scrunching up her face. She lowers her head and suddenly she's crying. No, she's even sobbing. Jiyong and I fall silent, not knowing what to do. I walk to her, intending to soothe her. But as soon as I wrap my hands around her shoulder and call her, she wards it angrily.

"Don't you dare call me mom! I don't have a gay son!"

Ouch. It cuts like a knife. "Mom," I start to cry, "I'm sorry."

"You're sorry? You're sorry, Seunghyun-ah? Then tell me why you-" she holds the back of her neck before she passes out.

I catch her as she falls and I lift her, carrying her to our bed. I wrap her with blankets and gaze at her sadly. I never meant to hurt my mom like this, but I just couldn't help falling in love with Jiyong. I've always been brave and blatant about us in public, once I even said "I love you GD" in one of our concert. But I can never do that in front of my mom, my family. I'm helpless.

Jiyong hugs me from my back, and I feel even sadder. I ward his hands gently, not wanting to hurt his feelings. "Not now, Jiyongie."

Fortunately he nods, understanding the position I'm in. I sigh in relief, thankful to have Jiyong beside me. I don't know what can I do if I don't have him. He walks out the room, leaving me alone with my mom. I lower my head, sobbing. To be honest I need Jiyong beside me, but I can't risk him being scold by my mom.

I don't know how long have I been waiting for my mom to wake up. But suddenly I hear her voice calling me, "Seunghyun-ah" I look up, my mom is awake.

I hold her hand but she wards it again. "I want you to stop seeing him. Come home, live with me again."

I sob and I shake my head, "I can't. I lo-"

"Don't say anything silly. You don't love him, you can't love a man."

I persistently shake my head, frustrating my mom. "I have set you up with Sohyeon, you remember her, right? Mrs. Kim's daughter."

"Mom, I don't want to be set up with anyone. I have made my choice." this time my voice is not shaking.

"You crazy bast-"

"I have proposed him, mom. I'm marrying Kwon Jiyong."

She stands up, shock with what she just heard, "You're marrying him?! Have you lost your sanity, Seunghyun-ah?!"

I stand up, shocking my mom, but I need to be clear with my dream, "Yes, mom, I have gone insane!"

She slaps me, hard. "You crazy bastard!" she sobs, "You are not my son." she covers her face with her hands, "Not anymore."

"Mom..." I hold her tight, "I'm sorry..." my voice's slowly fading.

She wards me again and open the door roughly. Jiyong's standing there, bringing some food that I believe is for my mom. My mom grabs him by the collar, choking him. I run to stop her but she's unstoppable, she pushes me. "You bastard, don't you ever think you'll marry him." She pushes Jiyong roughly, spilling the food that Jiyong brought. He's groaning and I see smoke puffs from the food. It's boiling and Jiyong's burnt. My mom walks to the door and slams it as she leaves.

I run to him, "Jiyongie, are you alright?" I sob, can't believe what my mom just did, and worried something bad happen to Jiyong. I open his shirt only to find his stomach is burning red. 

"Oh , your stomach is burning red." my voice's shaking.

"I'm fine, Seunghyun-ah, I'm really fine." he groans again. He's a bad liar.

Not knowing what to do, I can only apologize to Jiyong. "I'm sorry." I hid my face behind my hands and continue sobbing.

He hugs me and pats my back, "We'll work this out, Seunghyun-ah. We're strong."

"She told me to leave you, she is setting me up with her friend's daughter, I don't know, I don't know." I'm shaking, I've never been this sad. I never want to hurt my own mom, but I'm truly in love with Jiyong. I can't change the way I am, I love men.

"We're strong, Seunghyun-ah, nothing to worry about."

I look up to him, "She already set me up, Jiyongie."

"What?"

I sigh, "She already did, with her friend's daughter, my childhood friend."

He falls silent and I sob again, "What should I do, Jiyongie?"

"We'll find a way, don't worry. They don't know us."

I nod, calming myself down and I help him up. "Let's clean you up." He groans again, it must have been really hurt. I feel really bad for him. He cared about my mom even though she hates him. I lift him and I carry him to our bed. He keeps groaning and it's hurting me too. I can't see him in pain like this. I clean up the wound and give it some medicine before I wrap it with gauze.

Jiyong can't stop crying, he even screams. All I can do is hold him and soothe him. "It will heal soon, it won't hurt anymore, I promise."

After I finish wrapping it with gauze, I kiss his stomach, trying to soothe him. I gaze into his eyes, just to fall in love with him all over again. I wipe his tears and I kiss his lips several times until he stops crying. I lie beside him, sighing. I don't want to lose him.

"It has to be you, Jiyongie. It has to be you."

He rolls over to face me and he hugs me. We fall silent for quite some time, until I break down and start to cry again. He leans against me and sigh. Damn, his hair smells good.

"You fool, stop crying. We're going to be alright."

"Promise me." I sob again.

"I promise."

"I won't see the girl or my mom. I know that sounds wrong, but I won't see them until I'm officially married with you." I sigh, "I love you so much, Jiyongie."

"I love you too, Seunghyun-ah."

*************************************************************************************************************************************************************************

"Guys, we have something to announce." I smile and invite Jiyong to the front.

I wrap my arm around his waist, and smile widely to the audience, which are TOP, Daesung, and Youngbae. "We're getting married."

"Woah! For real?!" Daesung stands up and clapping his hands.

I nod, and Daesung rushes toward us, hugging us altogether. TOP joins not long after that, congratulating us. Youngbae congratulates us outside the circle, smiling to himself.

"So, who proposed?" asks TOP.

I raise my hand, and smile shyly like an idiot. "I did."

"Aigo, our maknae has grown to a man!" Daesung teases me.

"It's been a while since the last time I call him maknae." Jiyong adds.

I smile and I kiss his lips without hesitating, I want to show everyone that he's mine and I love him. I have always been so proud to call him mine. And about my mom...well, it's been several days since her surprising visit to our apartment. I haven't talk to her again ever since. I don't dare and I don't want to hear her telling me to leave Jiyong.

I love him (I can never get enough saying it to the world and to him), and I want to grow old with him. No one can stop me.

--

President Yang has found out about us and even about TOP-Daesung. Thankfully he doesn't mind to have people that have different ual orientations. I'm really grateful to have him as our CEO. He gave us freedom to choose what we want to be, and like a father, he supports us no matter what.

Now it seems like everyone know about us. They all give their blessings to us and support us as a couple. The only obstacle and the only people who's not supporting us right now are our family. Jiyong's parents have long banned him, since they found out that he's gay. I sometimes can't believe at how parents can easily ban their child just because they're different.

--

We're having YG family concert next week and we're practicing hard. President Yang has arranged the stage specifically for me and Jiyong. Jiyong is ecstatic upon hearing the news and he just can't stop telling me about the stage. I can only nod and smile to see him being cute like this. I sometimes think he's younger than me.

I smile and my mind flies back to the moment Big Bang first debuted. He'd scold me anywhere, anytime. Especially in TV shows. I was hurt, to be honest, but I couldn't do anything since Jiyong stated the reason to me. He didn't want public to notice us. I had no power that time and I just let him do whatever he thinks best.

Until the news stated that he's being violent towards me. It snapped him and he felt down. I felt bad for him, so I cheered him up.

"Let's show them how close we really are."

From that moment on, he'd always affectionate toward me. He fed me food in public, even kissed my cheek in public, held my hands, hugged me, and so on. Our relationshiop got stronger thanks to the stupid news.

It's our recess time and I'm gulping down as much water as my throat can. The dance routine exhausted me. I glance at Jiyong and I see him laughing to himself. I walk to him and snap my fingers in front of his face. He looks pissed for a while, just like the old times.

"What are you thinking, Jiyongie? You laugh to yourself. Creepy."

He chuckles, "Nothing."

"Even scarier."

He laughs again and he hugs me, burying his face on my neck. He's sweating really bad but weird enough he smells really good. I hug him back tightly and I kiss his head. I squeeze his hair and it's enough to . Handle yourself. My little brother's rising even though I'm trying hard to ward the thought of him . I hold my breath, trying to keep control of myself. It's in public for God's sake.

Thankfully TOP comes in time. "Okay guys, stop with the lovey dovey, we still have to practice."

*************************************************************************************************************************************************************************

My handphone rings. Lee Hana. I pick up the phone hesitantly, not wanting to hear her scolding me.

"Hello?"

"Oppa," I can hear her crying, "mom..."

I freeze, "What happened to mom?"

"She's in comma. She tried to suicide. Please come here. She needs you." she sobs.

She hung up, leaving me in shock. Just then Jiyong finishes his shower and walks toward me. His face changes after he sees me. "What happened, Seunghyun-ah?"

"My mom's in hospital right now."

He gasps, "I'm sorry, she's been hospitalized for how long?"

I shake my head, dizzy. "She's in comma, Jiyongie." I choke, "She tried to kill herself."

"Seunghyun-ah..." he walks closer to me.

I turn my face to see him, "I need to see her, Jiyongie."

He nods, "Of course, I'll take you there, you can't drive now."

I open my mouth, wanting to reject his kind offer because I don't want things to get complicated, but he stops me. "I won't come with you to the hospital, I'll just drive you there."

I nod, agreeing the condition and he drives me to the hospital. I feel anxious and I'm crying because I don't want anything bad happens to my mom. I haven't apologized to her. Not long after that, we arrive at the hospital. Jiyong drops me off on the lobby and I enter the hospital in a rush. I run all the way to the floor that my mom's in.

Upon arriving at the floor, Hana welcomes me with a yell. "You did this to her."

I lower my head, "How is mom?"

"How surprising, you still care about mom. I thought you only care about your gay boyfriend."

"Ya, watch your mouth." anger starts to fill in.

"She did this because she is depressed. And the reason why she is depressed is you!"

I fall silent because I knew that too myself. I sigh and I walk forward but she pushes me. "'If you want to see mom, you'll have to leave your boyfriend for good. You can't break mom's heart twice."

"Nonsense."

She pushes me even harder, "Then don't even think about seeing mom."

"Ya! I'm her son! I have the right to see her!"

"Have you forgotten, oppa?" she depresses the 'oppa' part, "you're no longer her son."

I sigh, defeated. "What do you want?"

"For God's sake! Weren't you listening? You've become more stupid. Leave him for good."

I shake my head, "I can't"

"I'll do it for you then. I have his number." she pulls out her phone from her pocket.

"Ya, ya!" again, I'm defeated. "I'll do it myself."

I leave her and walk to a corner, hesitating. I spend about 30 minutes before finally dialing Jiyong's number. He picks it up right away. "Seunghyun-ah?"

I can't say a word. He calls my name again. "Seunghyun-ah?"

I scrunch my face, about to cry. "Hyung, just go home first. I'll be home later." I hung up right away.

"Oppa! Oppa!" Hana's running to me, "mom's awake."

I run to her room just to see her lying on the bed weakly. "My son, Seunghyun-ah, you have come back to me."

I walk closer to her and she holds my hand tight. "Come home, live with mom again."

I can't stand seeing my mom's crying like that, after all she's been through because of me. As I think about Jiyong, he must be worrying over me right now and I feel really bad for him. But then I release a sigh, looking at my mom again, and I finally give in. "I will."