Chapter Fifteen: Now or Never

Finally, the day came. It’s the last day of their vacation. The moment Madeleine opened her eyes she knew it was the beginning of the end. The way the sun rose was bright as usual, but there was something different, or missing. It must be how the breeze suddenly became quite cold.  Madeleine took her fur sweater and bundled herself in it. It’s quite chilly this early in the morning, but she wanted to have a last view of the ocean.

When she got outside, Hyunsik was waiting there in a dark blue sweater that hugged his lean frame quite well, and his faded jeans. There were two bicycles waiting at the garage with the van.

“Good morning, Madeleine!”

Madeleine carefully stepped out with him. “What’s this for?”

“Let’s go bike together,” he said, patting the pink bike beside him. “Jeju Island is beautiful especially when you’re riding through it on bicycles. And I want to show you around one of Korea’s top vacation destinations. So, are you up for it?”

Madeleine beamed. “Sure, I’d like that. It’s our last day anyway, and I think it would make an awesome memory.”

Hyunsik picked up a pink helmet from inside the pink bike’s front basket and fixed it over the blonde girl’s head. He adjusted the straps just right, and Madeleine’s heart raced at the close proximity of his face from hers.

“I heard that there’s this nice café just off the coast. We’ll drop by there for some breakfast, then maybe we could go to the beach. Sound okay?”

Madeleine nodded and mounted her bike. Then even before Hyunsik finishes putting on his helmet, she sped out of the driveway.

“Hey! Where are you going?”

Madeleine laughed and waved. “Last one there’s a rotten egg!”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Ilsoon woke up to an empty room and smelled fried breakfast food coming from the kitchen. Then she realized that someone is actually cooking in the kitchen whereas her mother would opt to cook in their own cottage. Wait, don’t tell me—

“Good morning, Soonie!” chirped Eunkwang as he placed newly-fried eggs on the center plate. “Hungry enough for breakfast?”

Ilsoon mentally groaned and playfully smacked Eunkwang’s forearm. “Eggs again? I should have told Peniel to get up earlier to prepare some pancakes!”

Eunkwang scowled and messed up her already messy bed hair. “Aish, you ungrateful squirt. At least I cooked something. And sweetheart, those are pancakes.”

Ilsoon’s eyes bulged out of their sockets. “They are?” She quickly sat down and took a bite. Indeed they are! “These are actually pretty good!”

“Are they? That’s good. Me lessons with auntie weren’t wasted, then,” said Eunkwang. He put the pan in the sink and let water run over it.

I took one more bite and asked, “Why are you suddenly interested in making pancakes?”

“Why? Don’t you like them?” Eunkwang countered.

“I do, but that hardly mattered before. What’s the deal?”

All Eunkwang did was smile at like he knew something Ilsoon didn’t. And it ticked Ilsoon off.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“Hyunsik-ssi, let’s take a picture here!”

The two were at the beach after a lovely Western breakfast at the café. The wind was blowing through Madeleine’s blonde hair and Hyunsik thought she looked like an angel. He smiled and took her Polaroid, but as they posed for a picture, a nagging thought bothered Hyunsik’s mind.

I have to tell her.

“Wow! This looks great,” Madeleine squealed. “The sea really looks good in the morning.”

As Hyunsik gazed at her, he knew how much it would affect her once he told her what he was thinking. He clenched and unclenched my fists in his pockets in frustration. But he knew he had to do it, and the sooner the better.

“Madeleine.”

She turned abruptly and tilted her head. “Yes?”

“C-come with me.”

Hyunsik lead her right at the edge of the beach. He took off his shoes and continued barefoot on the sand. They walked along the sand for a while in utmost silence, with nothing but the sound of the crashing waves ringing in their ears, as Hyunsik contemplated on what he was about to say. But Madeleine seemed to have noticed his hesitance, because she came up to him and said,

“Is something wrong?”

Hyunsik took a deep breath. I have to do this. “Madeleine, look, I have to tell you something. Sit down beside me.”

He spread his hanky on the sand for her to sit on, like a real gentleman. Then he played with my fingers while she looked at him with concern.

“Madeleine, you see, I was thinking about what you said to me, you know, last night,” he began. This was harder than I thought.

Madeleine’s cheeks flushed bright pink. “Wh-what about it?”

Hyunsik took another deep, controlling breath. “And I told you I would respond to your confession today, right?”

She nodded.

Hyunsik bit his lip before hurriedly blurting out the words: “I… Well, I can’t respond positively to your confession.”

Madeleine went rigid. Hyunsik couldn’t bear look at her, so instead he looked out into the ocean. He blew a raspberry before continuing.

“I can’t respond positively to it… because I have someone else in my heart.”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Ilsoon was glaring now. “Come on, oppa. Tell me! I know that look!” Ilsoon insisted.

“What look?” Eunkwang retorted as he tried to hide the smile on his face.

“I saw that smile. Who is it for? Come on,” whined Ilsoon so loudly that it probably reached the hill across the sea. Eunkwang put a hand firmly on .

“Alright, alright! Just keep it down, will you?” he said. Her eyes widened and her face warmed up under his hand. But she nodded, and he removed it.

“So? Who are you making all this effort for?” she insisted. Aish, this girl is a lot pushier than her brother.

“W-well… I’m trying out Western food to… You know, to impress Madeleine a bit.”

Ilsoon’s eyes widened and she dropped her fork. What?

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Madeleine wanted to keep a straight, stoic face. For once I wanted to be strong. But it didn’t happen. Her face suddenly felt hot, and she found it hard to string words together.

“May I know who it is who got there first?” she asked quietly, her voice coming out ragged but high pitched.

Hyunsik fiddled with his fingers. “I didn’t want you to find out this way. I had no premonition about how you would feel about me. If you had tried to show me how you felt, I’m sorry that I didn’t understand it.”

Madeleine bit her lip. No tears… Please, no tears. “Who is she?” But as soon as she said it, she suddenly had a terrible feeling of the name he was going to utter.

“I… It’s Jung Ilsoon.”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“Wait, so y-you’re preparing this… For Madeleine?” said Ilsoon, flabbergasted.

Eunkwang nodded with a smile and turned his attention to the pan. He whistled as he worked, and it was obvious that he was happy. Ilsoon, meanwhile, suddenly felt a heavy weight drop on her shoulders. She slumped against her chair and lost her appetite.

“But oppa, I have something to tell you.”

“Wait just a second, Soonie, okay? Let me just finish this.”

Eunkwang didn’t seem to notice her existence after that. He was too busy preparing a plate of stacked pancakes. Ilsoon watched as he placed the platter on the counter and carefully drizzled maple syrup over it. Then he got a plastic container from the fridge holding fresh fruits. He put some of them on the pancake stack, and some more on the plate itself. When he was done, he washed his hands and wiped them on a paper towel. Then he faced Ilsoon.

“What was that you wanted to tell me?”

Ilsoon bit her lip. “It’s just… I… I forgot. But I did notice that Maddy was not in the room when I woke up. Her bed was made.”

Eunkwang’s forehead creased. “That’s strange. Where would she be this early—”

Just then, the front door burst open and Madeleine barged in, her face shadowed by her blonde hair and one of her hands covered . As she passed the two by the table, they heard a faint sob coming from her.

Much to Ilsoon’s disappointment, Eunkwang immediately hurried after her bestfriend, leaving the dark-haired girl in the kitchen. After a few minutes, Hyunsik came. He was sweaty and red, and his eyes were very sad. They lit up a second when he saw Ilsoon, but darkened again when he saw her dejected look. He sat beside her slowly and hesitated before saying anything.

“What’s wrong, Ilsoon?”

Ilsoon turned to him with a fake smile. Hyunsik knew because it was too obvious. “Hm? Nothing’s wrong! Wanna eat?”

“Uh, no. I kinda picked something up on the way home. C’mon, it’s written all over your face. What’s wrong?”

Ilsoon lowered her head and bit her lip. “I can trust you, right, Hyunsik?”

“Of course. What is it?”

Ilsoon clenched her fists on the table. “It’s over even before I could have my say. Did you see what he just did? He left me here, not even hearing what I want to tell him!”

Hyunsik’s eyebrows met at the center. What is she saying? With a horrible pause, he thought, did she confess to anyone? Who was it?

All of a sudden, Ilsoon stood up and ran out of the house. Hyunsik ran after her out into the beach. When he caught up with her, she was squatting right at the edge of the beach, the waves barely touching her toes. Her arms were folded into her body like she wanted to make herself scarce. But what the heartbreaking thing about it was, she was bawling her eyes out and crying in a despairing, depressed sort of way. Hyunsik’s shoulders slumped and he felt tears gather in his eyes. He fell on his knees beside her and wrapped his arms around her in a needy, urgent hug. Ilsoon’s petite form shook under his embrace, then she softened and clutched his waist in a desperate attempt to keep herself together.

“It hurts, okay?” came her muffled voice. “It hurts to have it happen again. Do I deserve this, after suffering long and hard enough to abandon my dream and my favorite city to come here, a place where I first felt this pain?”

Hyunsik gripped her body harder. “This is your home, Ilsoon. This is where everyone is. Your family is here, your brother is here—”

Ilsoon shook her head. “You don’t get it.”

“Then make me! I want to understand! I want to understand you!” Hyunsik pulled away and held her by her shoulders. Ilsoon just hung her head.

“You wouldn’t, okay. Just—”

“Ilsoon!”

Ilhoon and Sungjae were running down the beach toward them. At the sight of the two Ilhoon picked up his pace and knelt right in front of Ilsoon. He embraced her and gasped in relief. Sungjae ran up to them and panted, then patted Hyunsik’s shoulder.

“What… What happened?” he asked. But Hyunsik didn’t move nor reply, just stared at the Jung siblings. When Sungjae felt that the two needed time alone, he silently but forcefully urged Hyunsik to leave with him. Ilhoon and Ilsoon were left on the beach.

Ilhoon inhaled, then said, “I’m thinking it’s time for you to tell me what happened to you. From the beginning.”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-