SUNDAY

Dara opened her eyes slowly then realized what's happening to her. She felt weight on her shoulder, Jaejoong was sleeping next to her while wrapping his arms around her body. Dara didn't even know he untied her last night. Dara trailed her fingers around her wrist, feeling the burn of the red marks on her skin, but it could be worst if Jaejoong didn't put an ointment on it. 

Dara looked at Jae, he was still sleeping soundly, he looked so peaceful and didn't look to be someone who do all these things. He still looked ike her Jaejoong, the sweet and kind Jaejoong. Dara sighed sadly, what happened to him? Dara never imagined or not even a thought about Mrs.Kim cheated on Mr.Kim passed on her mind. Jaejoong must be so shock that he turned this way. Dara could tell Jaejoong adored his mother, from the way he told Dara some stories when he was a kid with his parents, but he just put some distance on them after he grew up. The way how Jaejoong introduced Dara long time ago to his parents, showed how proud he was of Dara, and how he respected and trusted his parents to introduce Dara to them.

Jaejoong is always alone, their parents are always away to work, and they just send him money. Jaejoong is technically a parentless kid whose financial is supported, even though he is not that close to them, Dara knows, even though Jaejoong never admitted it, Dara knows, She deeply knows, that Jaejoong loves his parents, he proves it by inviting them into a family dinner whenever he got a chance.What kind of a kid who doesn't love their parents?

Dara is sure Jaejoong must be too shaken by all of this. He is angry, betrayed and disappointed with his mother. Jaejoong needs help before it's too late, and Dara is more than willing to help, but before that, Dara needs to help herself out from here first.

Dara slowly put his arm away from her stomach, and when she's already able to sit up, she put her pillow beside Jaejoong so he could embraced it instead and moved his legs away from hers. She heaved a relief sigh when she's already able to climb ff the bed. Dara quickly moved towards the door, but much to her disappointment, the door was locked.

"I knew you'd try to run away." spoke Jaejoong calmly and the calmness drove her crazy. It made her having a goosebumps. wasnt he sleeping? "You can't escape."

"I want to go home." Dara mumbled scaredly, still standing in front of the door.

"This is your new home. You have to stay with me." Jaejoong still said it calmly, made Dara wondered if he really held his anger in or he wasn't mad?

"You know i can't live here. This is your home. I have my own hom-"

Jae squinted his eyes and his hand fisted into a ball, he slammed his fist to the bed and growled"Shut your mouth up and get back to the bed! i told you this is your home!

Dara got scared again and she quickly reached for the door knob, turning it repeatedly while banging the door, "HELP!!!! HELP!!!"

"Scream as much as you want, no one is home. Get back to the bed now while i'm asking nicely." he threatened, made Dara stopped yelling. Dara looked at him with a scare gaze, she didn't know what to do now. she grew tired after a while and jaejoong took deep breath to calmhimself before talking.

"Dara... i told you i'm changed. Come back here." Jaejoong sounded calmer now after seeing her face turned white, he bit his lips before hesitantly begged, "..please, come back to the bed. I won't hurt you.."

I won't hurt you..I won't hurt you..

Dara couldn't help but thinking of Jiyong. He said that before to her.

Jaejoong rolled out of the bed, and slowly approached her. She continued with her door banging, didn't care if it'd bruise her hand or not, but Jaejoong seemed to tell the truth. No response at all from outside of the door. Dara pushed herself to the corner, and squatted down, putting both of her arms around her head, protecting herself, expecting the worst from Jaejoong.

It took a minute until someone broke the silence.

"It really broke my heart to see you like this...and it broke myself to know that i'm the one who caused this.." Jaejoong sounded close to her, made her buried her face on her knees.

"I thought you're going to understand me. I'm scared, Dara. I'm begging you, i'll give you anything, i'll put my pride down and let you step it, but please don't leave me as well. I can't be without you." Jaejoong truthfully spoke again and reached for her back, wanting to pat her back to make her calmer, but he was surprise with her flinch.

Dara showed how much she scared with her eyes and Jaejoong saw that. Jaejoong felt like pulling Dara's arms already to make her fall in his arms like what he did before, but seeing how much his love scares him, really made him felt like his heart is being punched. He already felt that quite few times, whenever he saw bruises he made on Dara's arms, and face when he threw her the cola can, he has to say that he was upset too to see that, but he was the reason behind those bruises. Jaejoong wanted to stop, but Dara was starting to be on his nerve lately, he is already stress with the divorce and he couldn't help but made his stress away to do those harsh thing to Dara.

"I am sorry." Jaejoong apologized with a small voice, but Dara could hear it. Jaejoong stood up and unlocked the door, got out from the door leaving Dara alone and closed the door. Dara didn't hear any sound of the door being locked again, so she waited some time after she already felt a bit better and much more calmer. She stood up, wiping her wet face with the back of her hand, and she tiptoed to the door, making the softest sound she could made. The door was unlocked and Dara looked to the left and right before she rushed to the stairs. She was right, she was in the second floor.

The sight in front of her as soon as she reached the first floor was terrible. Jaejoong was standing in the kitchen with a knife in his hand, that he put on his other wrist.

"JAEJOONG!" Dara forgot her first plan and rushed to the kitchen. She stopped a few steps away from Jaejoong, and Jaejoong was already facing her with the knife still pointed at his skin.

"What the hell are you doing? Put the knife down!!!" Dara cried out.

He chuckled bitterly, "Why should i?! Someone like me doesn't deserve to live anymore! I don't have any purpose to live!!!"

"Jaejoong, please.. please.. don't do this.." Dara begged, reached out her arm and opened her palm, but Jaejoong stepped back.

"GO AWAY! LEAVE ME ALONE AS YOU WISH!" He yelled then whispered, "You are making me crazy."

"Jae, please.. put the knife down, you don't have to do this for yourself... Think about your dad, your mom,"

"DON'T YOU EVEN DARE TO MENTION HER! I HAVE NO MOTHER! i don't care of a cheater like her! He broke me, he broke my dad's heart... Now you're going to leave me too like her! No one cares me anymore, i don't see any reason to stay alive!" He sounded desperate already.

"How could you say that?!  We broke up, and that doesn't mean i don't care about you anymore.. I care about you, Jae...That's why i'm still not leaving.. Please give the knife to me.." Dara had to sound calm while her inside was already bursting with insanity.

"Don't you fckin lie to me! I hate liars!!" he shouted and pointed the knife at Dara. Dara gulped and felt her heart being squeezed in pain because it was so sad to watch Jaejoong like this...

"Jae, you know me..Do you think i'll lie to you?" she spoke shakingly, but still managed to do well.

Jae stared at her, and after seconds his eyes were filled with tears, finally another mental breakdown. His grip on the knife was loosen and he finally dropped it. Dara quickly grabbed the knife and put it away from Jae, then she grabbed his hand and guided him out of the kitchen, to the living room. Dara made Jaejoong sat on the couch and she inititated to hug him first to comfort him. Jaejoong's embrace for her was no kidding, he was like really using his strength to squeeze Dara while buried his face on her neck. Watching a man cry, hearing all his sob and whimper with your own eyes and ears just made your eyes watered as well. Dara patted and his back, while looking at the ceiling to stop her tears from falling, but it still fall anyways.

Jiyong walked back and forth for the thousand time today in the practice room with his phone on his hand. This morning, he tried to give a call to Dara but she didn't pick up. Yesterday when Seungri called her, she didn't pick up too. Somehow it made him feel worried. He wanted to give another call for Dara, afraid if she's angry with him and purposely ignore his call, but something made him feel uneasy. He said he wanted to give a day to be away from her so she can calm herself more, and has at least a day off from him. He realized he has been pressuring her and she must be fed up with him, but he just couldn't stop with his attempt to call her once again, but he has to keep his words. He must stop putting pressure to her so she can be free but...but...

"Yah hyung! Can you please, for God's sake, stop moving back and forth like that?!" Seungri tiredly said, he already feel irritated to see him going back and forth like an iron looking so miserable while staring at his phone. 

"Just give her another call if you want to, seriously...Haist.." whined Youngbae this time. TOP and Daesung didn't even care as they were playing by themselves.

"Do you think she'll hate me if i call her again?"

"For God's sake! Don't you have any dating experience at all?!" Seungri exploded, had enough with his pabo hyung.

"Well, i just dated twice...." Jiyong confessed.

Seungri rolled his eyes like an annoying ahjumma, "Excuse me? That amount of your dating life is the same as mine when i was in the junior high school."

"He's a player but now he doesn't even a girl to mess with." pointed TOP in the corner, earning a nod with a big laughter from Daesung. Seungri coughed loudly to cover their conversation.

"At least i'm  useful at this time. Why don't you tell me about you and Dara so i can give you advice." He sounded like a professional using the formality and such, but Jiyong who was so confused what to do, decided to tell a story and left the detail about the abuse.

"So, me and Dara....."

"Feeling better?" Dara asked while his hair. Jaejoong has stopped crying for a while, and his sob also already subsided. Jaejoong nodded like a kid while playing with the hem of her shirt. Dara slowly pushed him away, breaking the hug. Jaejoong whined like a kid who is going to be left by his mother, but Dara immediately shooed him.

"I'm just going to make some breakfast. Well, it's already your lunch time. I'm sure you are hungry as well, right? Where's your dad?"

Jae nodded weakly then answered, "He's in America... staying away from Korea for a while.."

Dara had to change the topic so he won't be reminded of his parents again, but she seemed has no idea about what topic they should talk about. She quietly checked the fridge, and it seemed like there's nothing to cook. Only eggs and kimchi inside. The kitchen was a mess too, so Jaejoong did try to cook last night.

"Jae, kimchi fried rice okay for you?"

"Yeah..." he answered softly as he laid down on the couch. 

Dara started with the ingredients, and cooking the vegetable, preparing the egg, rice and kimchi and everything. While doing so, she couldn't help but think that that day is just their usual activity whenever Dara visited Jaejoong. If only Jaejoong didn't change, and if only they didn't break up....

Dara sighed and asked herself an important question. Does she still love Jaejoong? She is lying if she says there's no feeling left to him in her heart. She spends quite long time with him and he was the first that made Dara realized what love is. He taught her lots of things, helped her a lot, and fill her empty life with his presence. Dara didn't know what she is going to be if Jaejoong isn't by herside months ago. Even with all the bad things he did to her, she still has to say that he's a great guy. And a great guy like him can't waste his time to be even greater. Dara wishes Jaejoong could be back to his oldself, and shows the world how great he is. Wishes couldn't happen if you just wish only, action is needed too. 

When she was cutting the kimchi, she felt arms from her back snaking around her frame. Her grip on the knife tighten before she loosen it a bit.

"Jae." Dara used the scolding tone.

"Hm.." He rested his half of his face on her shoulder, "Let's be like this for a while."

Dara felt a lump in but she still letting him hugging her.  She understood how he needed comfort the most now. It's better than facing the angry Jae. she just witness him crying for the first time and now, all she can gives is only comfort for him, before she found another way to help Jae.

Jaejoong closed his eyes, feeling the warmth of Dara's body in his arms really made him relaxed and xalmer, but he could feel how tense she was under his touch. It really made him upset because now she doesn't respond to him in the same way as she used to before. Jaejoong really want to change, at least today he tried to behave well, but he questioned himself. Can he act like this everyday? He doesn't even sure with himself. Jaejoong regretted how he treated Dara but somehow in other point, he really turned violent even without Dara around. 

With Dara's knife, he ripped the blue towel in her place because he knew it's not hers. It was Sanghyun and he wasn't even in Seoul to begin with. It really angered Jae because deep down he knew who she borrowed the towel for. Two words to express what he thinks about Kwon Jiyong, the new guy who always butted himself in their problem and now trying to take Dara away from him : Hatred and Jealousy.

Before that, when he arrived home after that night where he caught Jiyong sent Dara home, he even punched a mirror and broke his coffee table by throwing it. He still has the wound from that on his knuckles.

And even before that, he did something bad too, breaking his furnitures in the house again.

He's also afraid to hurt Dara. His anger is really easy to start with since he began to stress and once he's angry, he sees nothing but red everywhere. Everything that pisses him off, he really wanted to throw a punch at it. No matter if it's a person, or thing... He saw her black eye and she had to cover it with her hair at school. It angered him too, because he couldn't accept the fact that he caused that. He knew he doesn't deserve the love of Dara now, but he just can't let her go. He needs her love and her care, and He knows he IS the best for her.

"What can i do to win you back?"

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thank you for reading ! ^^