February 2010

Youngjae’s POV

“Youngjae-yah, have you heard about the new student?” my classmate said as I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked up from the book I was reading, turning to the owner of the voice. “Is there? I thought our school doesn’t accept transferees…” I simply said and turned to read my book again.

“You’re studying again? But it’s just the start of the school year…” he said, sitting on the chair in front of me.  I just smiled, not bothering to look at him. “I need to study or else I’ll repeat a year or even get kicked out…” I said.

“You don’t need to study, Youngjae. You’re even smarter than all of us combined!” he exclaimed, making hand gestures at every word he said. “Thanks..” I smiled. I’m used to those kinds of compliment, and I don’t have to blush like a tomato like what’s happening in animes or mangas where they put a shade of red in a character’s face.

A few moments later, the class suddenly fell into silence, and I knew the teacher just came in. I closed the book I was reading, focusing my attention to the teacher since I’m not that rude. She had that usual smile on her face. I don’t know why but I feel comfortable with it.

She was our Math teacher when we were in first, so we know her well. “So, guys, as you a;; know, our school doesn’t accept transfer students and this will be the first and last time. He is assigned to our class, and I hope you’ll all get along with him”

“So it’s a boy~!” one of my classmates squealed, followed by the squeals of my female classmates and cries of frustrations by my male classmates. When the class got noisier, our teacher stomped her foot on the wooden platform few times to ease our noise.

Most of my classmates covered their ears since it was really ear-wrecking. Good thing I always wear my earplugs ^_^ … After the class have been controlled again, our teacher finally called the new student.

“You may now come in…” she said, pointing at the door. Then, a head of a boy poked from outside. I looked at my female classmates to see their reactions. Most of them gasped in awe. Few have their eyes wide and jaw dropped, as if they’ve seen a ghost. I wondered why, so I looked at the student. He had a light brown, messy hair, a nose that I can’t even describe if it’s pointy or large, a pair of pink full lips and a pair of piercing eyes in which if you look at them, you’d be melting.

Yeah, he’s handsome, so what?

I stared blankly at his dark brown orbs, suddenly realizing that he’s staring back at me. That was when my heart skipped a beat. He’s looking at me.

I looked away, pretending to stare at the window. “Please introduce yourself” I heard our teacher say. I looked in front again, and luckily, he’s not looking at me anymore.

I examined him this time. His hair is a bit messy, and some of his bangs were covering those piercing eyes. Then, he had loose necktie, an open jacket, two of his buttons were ed, revealing his collarbones. And most of all, his uniform is not pressed well.

Yes, he may have some utterly good looks but I swear he can be labeled as the ‘bad boy’ or ‘troublemaker’ or worst ‘thug’.

“Jung Daehyun. 16 years old,” he said, not even having enough respect to bow. He really can be described at bad boy’ by the way of his greeting. But then again, our teacher just gave him a smile.. “Why don’t you tell us your interests?” she asked.

He just looked at her blankly, then at us. “I love cheesecake.” He said flatly. The whole class must be laughing right now but because of this Daehyun guy’s gaze, we just stared at him.

“Is that all?” our teacher asked. “Neh.” He replied. She then pointed him his seat, just a seat away from mine. There were only three seats at the very back of the class: the one I’m sitting right now, the seat beside me, and Daehyun’s seat.

After the homeroom was over, the teacher called me out. As I was making my way out of the classroom, I could feel many pairs of eyes looking at me, wondering why I was called out. I just wish they could mind their own businesses.

Once out, I saw our teacher with a sad look on her face. “You may wonder why I called you out and why we accepted ‘such’ student in this school…” she trailed off. I just tood there, silent, showing that I’m listening.

-

The day went by, me thinking if I could do it. For the first time, I started doubting myself. I noticed that Daehyun isn’t very sociable, just like me. He never talked to any of our classmates and he always sleeps in class.

What Ms. Jung said to me earlier kept replaying in my mind even before I sleep.

She said that she asked the director of our school to accept Daehyun because she thought he might be changed back to his old self again. He was the son of Ms. Jung’s cousin, so she wanted to take care of him.

She said that Daehyun was a really good boy when he was young, but he started to change when he entered high school. Ms. Jung’s cousin left Daehyun with his mother, and was courting another woman even if Daehyun was still a child. “Please help him, Youngjae…”  she told me.

After that, I just stood speechless. She said she’d be waiting for my answer. How am I supposed to do it if we don’t even talked to each other?

Then I recall someone talking to him. Han Hyunseok. She was talking to him earlier even if he just ignores her. She is a noona, four months older than me. She’s really friendly, outgoing, pretty, smart and humble. She’s even the president of our class.

A perfect girl for the perfect job.

-

The next day, I told Ms. Jung that I can’t do it. I told her that maybe Hyunseok can do it. She sighed, understanding my situation. She knows I’m weak in these kinds of thing, so she just smiled at me even thought I failed her. “It’s okay, Youngjae-yah. You can go back now…” she smiled sweetly at me.

* * *

Days passed, weeks passed and months passed. The Daehyun I see right now is way different from the Daehyun I saw from the first day. He’s smiling now, and mingling with others.

His appearance changed a lot. He looked cleaner.  His hair is finely combed now, and his uniforms are well pressed and he wears his uniforms correctly. He wouldn’t have been like that if it wasn’t because of Hyunseok. I know she could do the job well.

They were always seen together, often labeled as ‘the couple’ but they would always deny it. I don’t know why but I felt like there was something tight around my chest. Suddenly I became nervous. Every time I felt it, I always go to the doctor to  know if I was having a cardiac arrest.

But the doctor always said that that I’m fine, except that I’m a bit stressed.

The cycle goes on and on, me seeing Daehyun and Hyunseok laughing at each other as if they were lovers, and that weird feeling around my chest comes again. I tried to ignore it, but as time goes by, it becomes worse and worse. Sometimes I just feel like crying because I couldn’t handle the pain anymore.

Days passed again, and that cycle just went by. I always found myself thinking about Daehyun, but that weird feeling would come crossing my mind by the time I recall him having fun with Hyunseok.

I hate it. I hate what I feel towards him. I hate that I hate what I feel towards him. I hate it that I’m still the old me. I hate it that he changed into a completely different person that made me feel like this towards him.

I hate that even though our eyes met several times already, we haven’t actually really talked to each other or he doesn’t even know my name.

I hate it that every night I cry, just wasting my time thinking why I’m acting and feeling like this. It confuses me and I hate it. Sometime, I’m making myself believe that it must be that I…

But that wouldn’t make any sense.

He’s a star in the sky, and I’m just a bird, flying towards him. But no matter how hard I try to reach him, I end up hurting myself and fall again. Just like a bird who flies towards the sky

End of Youngjae's POV

PRAISE TO YOUNGJAE FOR BEING SO DRAMATIC AND SENTIMENTAL!!!!!!! *le change mood* I still can’t believe school’s starting in two days…  TWO FREAKING DAYS!!!

PS: the ulzzang up there is Jung Bora ^^