Chapter 1

Taemin took the cold damp cloth and started to wipe down the counter. The morning sunlight was filtering into the small café. The beam of light hit the shining wet surface of the counter catching his eye. He stared at the light, vision blurring and turning white around him everywhere but that spot on the counter top.  His mind went blank for a brief moment. He sighed. When he felt the hot tear slowly roll down his cheek, he snapped out of it and wiped his cheek and continued to clean off the counter top.  I can’t think about it, I have to focus on work.

It had been 2 years ago today.   He couldn’t stop thinking about him and what happened.  His blank thoughts turned into those thoughts again of years ago that he was trying not to think about. But thanks to that tear forcing him to remember it all, his eyes started to puddle even more. He kept wiping at his eyes.  He left the wash rag on the counter and went to the kitchen. He walked over to the sink; splashed water on his face, ran his fingers through his hair and looked into the mirror on the wall behind the sink. He took a deep breath “come on you can do this.” he said to himself in a shaky voice.

“Taemin, Please go unlock the doors. Its 8am already.”

“Yes boss.” He turned around and his Manager saw his sad face, his red puffy eyes

“Were you crying?”

“No, I wasn’t.” He wiped his cheek as he answered softly.

“Taemin I’m sorry... do you need to talk about it?”

“No I’m fine, but thank you for your concern.”

“Are you sure? Did something happen why are you crying?”

“I’m not crying, it’s nothing, I said I’m fine!” Taemin snapped.

“Taemin, why are you yelling at me?”

“I’m sorry.” He started to tear up again. He walked past the manager so he couldn’t see the tears that were begging to be released.

“Taemin” he said making Taemin stop in his tracks “if there is anything I can do just let me know, and if you need to go home or leave early, you can.”

“I am working today. It will keep my mind busy. But thank you. I am sorry I yelled at you it won’t happen again.” He continued to walk out of the kitchen and into the dinner.

“Well if you change your mind and want to go home, just let me know.”  He spoke loudly from the kitchen as he watched Taemin walk away.

Taemin picked up his wash cloth from the counter top on his way to the front door to unlock it.

After unlocking the door, he went back to cleaning the counter.

The counters were clean but he kept doing it over and over. He wiped along till he got to the register and he saw the small table top calendar; the date staring back at him, the big black bold numbers taunting him.  He slammed the calendar closed and threw it under the counter.  “Why is this still so hard? Why did you leave me, it’s unfair.  I can’t move on, I’m stuck. I’m lost without you. I’m sacred, I’m angry. I hate your family, they hate me, and how dare they take that last moment away from us. From me, I needed that. Where is my ing closure? You said you’d watch over me, are you? Where are you? Yep that is right, I’m alone. It’s not fair. You’d said… you said… Oh it doesn’t matter. I love you, if I think of you; you can’t and won’t ever disappear. You live in here.” He touched his heart. .. “And always will.”

 His thoughts were so loud, he was moving on automatic around the café wiping and sweeping and realigning the salt and pepper shakers on the tables over and over all while his thoughts screamed at him, echoing forever in his head. Today of all days on this date they were always non stop.  Any other day he could remember the happy times; but on this bitter date he grieved for the past for what could never be, and the loss of him. He tried hard all the time not to feel sorry for himself. But being alone, he never got to process everything. There was no one to talk to about this. 

“Taemin, you cleaned the entire restaurant probably 4 times already. Just sit at a table and wait for customers. You can go home; Wednesdays are always our slowest days.”

“No, I’m fine thank you but I will stay.”

He began washing the windows.  He tried to think about the good times, but none came to mind even though there were so many. He just kept seeing their faces, all their faces, yelling at him pulling him away from him. “So unfair.” 

His thoughts slowly dissolved into mind numbing nothingness once again as he wiped the windows. Something caught his eye. He squinted to see what was hitting him in the eye. He looked away from the window and his eyes focused pass the glass to the ground outside. The sun was shining down on a bright key on the sidewalk outside the café.  A single thought popped up. A memory he hadn’t thought about in many years. It was the memory of him, giving him his lucky key when they were 10yrs old. He smiled to himself. He walked out of the cafe and picked up that key. Sorry, I shouldn’t have gotten so upset, it’s just hard without you and I miss you, I knew you were watching over me like you said, this is my proof. I’m sorry, I love you Kibum. You always knew how to make me smile. He stuck the key in his pocket.

He went back inside and washed the other window. But he did so this time with a small warm smile on his face. As he finally had it, a good memory and he wanted to hold on to that one as long as he could before something triggered it to change again against his will.

A man walking along outside knelt down to tie his shoe.  He saw something out the corner of his eyes, something moving, somebody waving?  He looked up. He saw a man washing the window. Oh I thought someone was waving at me. He stood up and looked at him getting a better look, he noticed he was cute. He had a kind face there was a smile on his face but something else behind those eyes, something, intriguing. He wasn’t sure why but he felt he had to go inside and at least meet this person. He stepped inside the small café.

Taemin didn’t hear the jiggle of the bells above the door when the door hit it as it opened. He didn’t see him looking at him from outside and he didn’t see him come in and sit down.  Taemin was replaying his lucky key memory. 

He heard his boss clear his throat. Taemin turned his head to look for his manager and saw his 1^st and only customer so he didn’t bother looking for his manager knowing that that is why he made a sound. He had to take his order.

He walked over to the handsome man. “Hello I’ll be your server, would you like some coffee this morning?”

“I would like orange juice please.”

“Anything else?” He said while looking at his notepad writing down ‘orange juice’. He didn’t need to write it down, he could just go get it but he did it anyway.

“Um, I’m not sure what I want to eat though. I just felt I had to come in here. I’m not really all that hungry.”

“We have eggs, toast... It’s mostly a western style breakfast; I can get you a menu?”

“What do you recommend?”

“We have a special on pancakes today, if you want to order some?”

“I think I just want pie. Do you have pie?” He smiled from ear to ear.

Taemin didn’t look into his eyes until that moment. He looked up from his notepad. “Pie? For breakfast?” Taemin tried to hold back from sobbing. His voice was so quiet. He liked to eat pie for breakfast sometimes too.

 “Yes, with lots of whipped cream.” He smiled again. “And I mean lots of it.” He giggled.  

But Taemin didn’t cry he smiled. This man was cute, the thought of thinking he was cute was frightening when he realized he had thought it. He cleared his throat. “Umm. Yes. I can get you that. One orange juice and 1 pie with whipped cream coming up.”

Taemin flipped his notebook closed and walked to the back to get his juice. Taemin whispered to himself “Kibum did you hear that? He likes his pie for breakfast like you do.” He half smiled. “Sorry I thought he was cute. Please don’t be mad. I feel bad about thinking it, especially today. Sorry.” He filled the glass. “Oh I forgot to ask him what kind of pie he wanted.” He brings the juice to the counter top and places it down. He looks in the case of cakes, pies and other disserts “I’ll give him your favorite.”  He cuts the pie and places it on a white plate and squirts whip cream all over it like he use to do for Kibum, and takes the juice and pie over to the customer.

“Here you go please enjoy.”

“Thank you.”

Taemin walked away to wait behind the counter.  He drifted off into space again.

The man took a bite. “Excuse me.”

Taemin walked back over to the table. “Yes may I help you with something else?”

“This is the best pie I have ever eaten! And it’s the right amount of whipped cream too. And Pumpkin is my favorite!”

“Thank you. I actually made the pie last night.” Because I was missing my Kibum.

“You made this, what’s your name? I’m coming to eat here every day I think. Oh goodness this is so good. Thank you” He smiled and talked and ate all at the same time.

Taemin smiled a real smile... How long had it been since he had a real smile? He blushed. “Thank you.” Their eyes locked for a moment, Taemin’s cheeks turned red. Then all of a sudden he felt guilty.  His smile started to fade, he yelled at himself in his head. I’m sorry Kibum I’m so sorry. I will apologize in person today, I swear.  I didn’t know he’d like it like you do. I thought he would just enjoy it but not LOVE it.  “I’m Taemin I’m sorry I forgot to introduce myself when I took your order.” His eyes started to puddle.

“I’m not mad, don’t cry. I was thanking you not scolding you. I am praising your awesome pie making.” He smiled and playfully nudged Taemin’s arm.

Taemin felt warm and dizzy. “I’m sorry I have to sit down if you don’t mind.” He sat across from the man. “Sorry I took it the wrong way. I’m just having one of those days you know. When everything eats at you and your brain won’t shut off ya’ know?”  But as soon as he said that he tried to take the conversation back. Taemin’s face dropped, his depression showing on his face. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be talking about myself.”  He stood up and smoothed out his little apron. “Thank you for the compliment, I’ll be up at the register whenever you are ready to pay. Please take your time and enjoy the pie.”

“Wait. My name is Jinki. It’s nice to meet you. And you really are a good cook.  Wait, did you say your name was? Taemin?

“Yes.”

“Do I know you from somewhere?”

“Um I don’t think we know each other.”

“Where did you go to school? Maybe we went to the same high school. I feel like I know you.”

“I went to school here.”

“Oh. hmm then that isn’t it. I went to school in Daegu.”

Taemin felt dizzy again. “I’m sorry I need to sit down.” Kibum was from there, he likes pie, you whipped cream. Why does he have a cute smile? I’m going to be sick. It was all too much for Taemin. He literally couldn’t take it.

“Here please sit down at my table its ok.”

“Thank you.” Elbows on the table he put his head in his palms. “I feel sick.”

“Um. Do you want me to get your manager or some water?” He looked at the younger man. There was no response.

Taemin put his hands down. He had tears in his eyes.

“Are you ok? Here let me get someone for you.” Jinki stood up to get the manager.

“You can’t get him for me. It’s too late. Just sit down. And give me a minute.” Taemin’s voice trembled.

“Ok I won’t get your manager.” He said calmly, he sat back down.

Taemin rolled his eyes that Jinki didn’t know what the hell he was talking about. “Sorry.” He wanted to cry harder but didn’t. He laid his head on his forearm and the other arm flopped out across the table. He never told anyone what happened 2 years ago and the joy that came before it.

Jinki looked at the hand. Then back up to the top of Taemin’s head. “Please don’t cry.” He placed his hand atop Taemin’s. 

Taemin felt the warmth. He took a shaky breath. “I miss your hand, this isn’t fair.” He mumbled to himself.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t hear you.”

Taemin picked up his head, his eyes red, you could see he was trying hard to suppress his tears.  “I’ll be alright.” He sniffed. “I use to know someone who was from Daegu.” He moved here when he was 10 and we became best friends.  I don’t mean to rush you all of sudden, but since you seemed to be really friendly and nice I must tell you, I feel dizzy, and I have a huge headache. I feel like an Army is marching across my forehead. Can you pay for this now, or have my manager ring up your bill, because I think I have to go home now.”

“It’s ok” he patted Taemin’s hand. He walked up to the counter. He rang the little bell; the manger came out from the kitchen and saw Taemin with his head down on the table. He then looked at Jinki. “I am sorry about my staff. He won’t be like this next time. Other than that how was your meal?”

“It was fantastic. He is an excellent cook. That pie was exquisite. He feels sick, he told me, so don’t be mad at him for lying down.”

“He will be alright. I told him to go home but he wouldn’t go.”

“Well he needs to go home right now. He said he felt sick, had a headache.”

“Well that is more than he tells me. Don’t worry sir. I will make him go home.”

“I’ll come back. This is now my favorite café diner because of him.”

Jinki pays for his bill and walks back to the table and rests a hand on Taemin’s back. Taemin had drifted off to sleep. The warm hand on his back stirs him awake.  “Will you be ok?”

Taemin sits up slowly and covers his face with his hands and wipes at his dry face. He takes a deep breath, lowers his hands “Yes I’ll be fine. I have to go, excuse me.” He stands up. Jinki’s hand slides down his back and off of him as he gets up.  The caring gesture of a simple human touch of comfort made him feel strange, guilty maybe,  of being weak and making someone give him attention.  “I am sorry for my behavior, you have been very understanding, and I will be more professional next time.”

“It’s all right we all have bad days, it’s not your fault you got a headache.   I would be upset if you didn’t take a rest and sit down.”  He rubbed Taemin’s shoulder. “Your boss said it was ok for you to go home now.  So you can go home and sleep.  It’s a shame. It’s such a beautiful day to be sick.”

Taemin awkwardly smiled, “The funny thing is every year it’s this sunny on this date. It’s like it does it to me on purpose.”

“Hmm?”

“Nothing. I think I would like it to rain just once on this day.” Taemin tried walking towards the door, but stumbled.

“Here let me help you.” Jinki wrapped Taemin’s arm around his neck, and walked him to the door. “I don’t have to work today if you would like me to walk you home?”

“No, I’m fine, just walk me to the bench over there, I’ll sit there for a bit. Then I will go home.” They walked outside. Jinki sat them down on the bench.  They faced the little cafe.

“So why do you want it to rain today?”

“I’m dizzy; I don’t want to burden you. You can go I’ll be alright.”

“Did you just avoid my question?” He nudged him.

“I just met you, why are you still talking to me and being nice?”

“Why not?”

“Well I don’t want to talk about it with a stranger! Even If I did know you, I probably wouldn’t tell you.” he said in a snide tone.

“Did I do something to offend you?”

“No. You have been nice but I just don’t understand. And I have issues. I’d be too much for anyone to keep up with me. “

“How about this… I’ll come back tomorrow and you have some of that pumpkin pie waiting for me, and we can get to know each other and we won’t be strangers anymore.  I’m human too; remember that, so I have issues as well, everyone does. Life and friendships shouldn’t stop or be prevented just because life gets in the way with all its little issues. A friend told me that once. I like you, your honest, and please do not be offended when I say this, but you’re handsome too, so you shouldn’t frown like that. Let’s start over. I’m Lee Jinki nice to meet you today on this lovely city bench. Let this be the day you remember the day you met Jinki the pumpkin pie eater. I’ll remember this day as the day I met Taemin the man of mystery.” He tried to make Taemin smile but failed.

I can’t

“Well? Is it a deal? I’ll come back tomorrow and get to know you?” Jinki asked.

Taemin stood up and bowed. “Thank you for helping me. I feel better now" he lied. "I must go.” Taemin walked away fast.

Jinki sits there watching the man walk away. “Did I say something wrong?”

Author’s note:  Just in case you missed it, This line->    ‘He wasn’t sure why but he felt he had to go inside and at least meet this person.’ ……That was Jinki’s guardian angel making him feel like he should go into the café to met Taemin.  (there will be more on that in Key’s POV)

And the reason Jinki thinks he knows him is because they are meant to fall in love. …you’ll find out more about that in later chapters….Just thought I should tell you that, I don’t want to confuse anyone. lol. (that will also be part of Key’s POV)

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Did Jinki know Kibum when he was kid???? Or is this just a sign from heaven they should know each other, or just a coincidence about the pie and being from Daegu???