“Dara are you sure about this?” Bom asked as she watches me pack my things.

 

“Yes, I already made my decision. I’m going to look for him”, I told her as I continue to throw my clothes inside my bag.

 

“But you don’t know where he is”, I stop on what I was doing since I knew she was right. I don’t know where on earth could he be but I don’t care. I’m willing to sacrifice all my savings just to find him.

 

“I’ll find him, Bom, I will— I don’t care if I search the whole wide world just to find him. I definitely going to get him back”

 

“But noona. hyung is from another planet”, Seungri blurted out from behind Bom. He had also been coming in my place very often and I'm not really sure if I'm happy about it.

 

“Thanks Seungri you just let my hopes really high”, I said sarcastically as I gave him the looks.

 

“I’m just reminding you that his an alien, you might have forgotten”

 

“Seungri!” Bom warned him as I glared.

 

I don’t know whether he was trying to make me laugh or just irritating me, but I had no time for his stupid jokes. I shoo the two outside my room as I continue to pack my things.

 

After the talk with Jae and missing him for like centuries already, I came to this plan of searchig for him. I'm really going insane everynight I dream about him. I was really stupid of letting the only man I love go, for giving him heartaches and making him suffer . I was at fault and I accept that.

 

After putting everything in the suit case I decided to head out. I stop a few inches away from the bed room door as I saw the man that enters the apartment. He was wearing his usual get up, jeans, simple t-shirt and his cap. Two men in black uniform were with him.

 

“Sangjangnim!” Seungri was also surprise to see the man standing before us but as the man look at him. He immediately bowed down in respect.

 

He was the YG president Yang Hyun Suk, the only guy who knew where he is. A new hope emerges inside of me as I look at Mr. YG. He is someone Seunghyun consider us his second appa. The man who took them in and help them reach their dreams.

 

“You, should be in the practice room, what are you doing here?” he asked Seungri.

 

“I was just—hyung why are you here?” he turn the question back to him.

 

“I’m here for Ms. Park”, he turns to me. “You’re leaving?” he asked as he eyed my suitcase.

 

“neh”, I softly answer.

 

“To find him, right?”

 

I nodded.

 

“We need to talk, if that’s okay with you?”

 

“Yeah”, I answered since I really need to talk to him and find out where he had hid him.

 

Seungri went back to his rehearsal as the two who was supposed to be Mr. YG’s bodyguard was outside, Bom on the other hand make us some coffee before heading out telling me that she’ll come back later once we are done. She never really wants to leave me, but I had to have a one on one talk with this guy.

 

 “Just gave him a year, Dara. I promise I’ll bring him back but for now, let him fix himself, let him stand up and reach for his dreams. He had asked me for it and I made a promise. I’m going to make his dream come true with the condition he had to only focus on it. You know how important those dreams are for him. He almost gave it all up for you but you broke his heart and now he is pursuing it again, I don’t want him to lose focus for the second time around”

 

“But—”

 

“Remember the thing I asked you before?”

 

“Neh”, I look at my cup as I remember his word.

 

“And I think you already knew the right answer for that”

 

I swiftly nodded. A long time ago we also had a talk like this and that time Top’s fame is almost on its highest peak, he asked me something like ‘If TOP"S going to choose between me and his career is he going to consider choosing me?’ And at that time I doubt him, I thought he was enjoying his new life that he already had no time for me, and I was a fool for thinking that way.

 

“He will surely give up everything for you, even his dreams. Would you like to be the hindrance in TOP’s career?”

 

I swallow hard as those word came from him, me, a hindrance in his dream?

 

“Just a year, Dara. Gave him a year to reach his dreams and once that one year is gone, I will no longer oppose your decisions. One year is just what I asked”

 

---

 

“So you’re no longer leaving?” Bom asked as Dara called to cancel her flight.

 

She came back with Seungri since the lather insists in checking his noona after she had a talk with their president. He knew that the president really oppose relationship in their group especially TOP and GD. He said it will ruin their career though TOP had himself a girlfriend before he enter the group and try to keep it a secret. But after sometime he also found out about it. He strongly opposes it but TOP stand up for her that’s why he doesn’t want his hyung and her noona to give it up that easily.

 

“I’m not”, she said in a sad lifeless tone, “Sorry for bringing you guys so much trouble”

 

“Did that old man, black mail you or something?” Seungri then asked.

 

Dara just gave him a tired smile looking away and then excuse herself and went back to her room, Seungri silently followed her.

 

“I thought you love him” Seungri said, “are you just going to give him up just like that, why are you like this?”

 

““Yes I love him”, Dara turns to face him with a broken expression.

 

“Then why are you giving up on him? Is it because of Sangjangnim? Forget about him we all knew he oppose you, noona. Don’t you love, hyung?”

 

“I love him, Seungri— I love him more than anything else in this world, and there is nothing that I would like better than to hold on to him forever. But I know it's not for the best.— So no matter how much my heart is going to break, I've got to let him go so he can know just how much I love him. Maybe if I'm lucky, he'll come back, but if not, I can make it through this. I’ll try to make it through this", the tears that she thought had dried up once again roll on her cheeks as she let go of what she truly felt.

 

“noona”, he clamps Dara into a tight hug cooing her back. He knew it was hard for her to make that decision seeing that she once again started crying.

 

“It’s for the best” she mumbles trying to make him believe that her decision is really for the best. She actually don’t want to ruin the career he was trying to have, the dream he always dream off since they where a child. She remembers how proud he was every time he’ll tell his dreams to her. How he told her that he’ll became a star and will surely make her proud. At first she thought it might be impossible and all of those was just a dream to him but now it’s getting reachable for him, she don’t want to became a hindrance to it. She doesn’t want him to give up on his long time dreams just because of her selfishness. Yes, she wants him back but will she be able to be happy when she knew she will be the reason why he wasn’t able to make his dream come true.

---

 

Sandara’s POV

 

I went my way in a hurry to the yg building after I received Youngbae’s call.

 

‘What the hell came up in his mind to act that way?’

 

As soon as my feet landed inside the building I sprinted into a run toward there dressing room and was greeted with a heavy aura. Jiyong was sitting on the side with balled fist, eyebrow crossed and I think I heard him curse under his breath after kicking the chair in front of him.

 

“Noona”, Daesung worried voice greeted me making me glance at him.

 

“Where is he?” I asked.

 

“At the rooftop, Seven hyung left him there”

 

“I hope you can enter some sense in his brain”, Jiyong uttered with grinded teeth as irritation rings in his voice.

 

“Don’t worry I’ll talk to him, sorry for the trouble”, I gave them a bow and went my way to the rooftop.

 

I’m really going to pound that brat for causing trouble. Who in the right mind will storm inside their president office and called him good for nothing old man. Do he want to get fired and not only that he also throw his anger to his hyung after not finding his main target.

 

Aisht!!!!

 

I open up the door to the rooftop and saw him leaning on the wall, his back facing me while he was burying his face on his palms.

 

Is he crying?

---

*flashback

 

Balled fist, eyebrow connected and teeth grinding together, Seungri storm back to his company. his eyes and feet was on fire as he make his way to the top floor where the president office was located.

 

“Hey, Seungri?” Jiyong greeted as they saw their maknae.

 

“I’m really going to pound that old man”, they heard him mumble as he past them.

 

The three look at ano another as the saw their maknae trembling in anger, at once they knew something is wrong and trail behind him. Seungri’s step became quick as he saw the door toward their sajangnim office.

 

“Yah, Old man!!!!” he shouted but no one answer him. He was about to trash the room but his hyung got a hold of him.

 

“Yah, Seungri what do you think your doing?” Jiyong asked as they where blocking his way and trying to pin him on the wall. He look at them with murderous eyes as he throw random curse. “He is doing it again. I’m really going to make him pay. He can’t control us and the person around us. He such an a—“, he hadn’t finished his last words when a punch landed on his face.

 

“Stop it you brat!” Jiyong jaw tighten as he heard insults coming from their maknae’s mouth. “don’t talk about hyung like that. You would be nothing if not because of him. We owe him so much have some respect”

 

“but he is—“

 

“Looking for me?” all eyes turn to the door as Yang Hyun suk enter the room. Once again Seungri’s eyes turn into slits but his hyung hold him in place.

 

“you—“

 

“SEUNGRI!!!” Jiyong warned.

 

He glared at him shook their hands off his shoulders and storm out of the room. He adore his hyung so much and so his noona, that he hates seeing them broken. He is there number one fan and he gone very close with the two that cause him to get angry to the person who he thought was destroying their almost perfect relationship.

 

*end of flashback

 

“Seungri”, a soft hand place on his shoulders and he saw his noona standing beside him. He was actually outside the rooftop trying to get some fresh air to calm his self.

 

“what are you doing here?” he asked Dara who took a seat beside him.

 

“I heard what happen and I was really disappointed”, he watch her as she look far away, “You shouldn’t done that”

 

“But it is his fault”

 

“No, it isn’t”, she look at him and smile, “It wasn’t his faults. It’s entirely mine”

 

He just look at her confuse.

 

“If I didn’t get affected with rumours and words of other people we wouldn’t have break up. It wasn’t sangjangnims fault that I’m weak”

 

“But you could return back to each other if he just cooperate and tell us where he is but instead he told you not to look for him”

 

“It’s my decision if I would listen to him or not so it’s still my fault. Maybe we weren’t really meant for each other—“

 

“ANI”, Seungri immediately protested as he hear those words from her, “after what happen I’m certain you two only belongs to one another”

 

“Aigoo, your bias”, Dara chuckle as he mess his hair and start laughing as their number one fan is being persistent about them.”If we really are meant for one another whatever happen destiny will find its way to get us back together”

 

“do you really believe on what Youngbae told you about that destiny thing?” he asked fixing his messy hair.

 

Wind blow softly as Dara look at the sky above her. He always hear Youngbe talking about the thing he called destiny he believes that someday he’ll find the one destine to him that’s why he was really calm about relationship. And like him she also wanted to believe that destiny will find it’s way to get them back together, she wanted to believe that he is the one destine to her and so is she to him. She wanted to trust destiny like how Youngbae trusted it.

 

“I believe it”, she then said and Seungri watched her amaze.

 

“If that’s the case, I would blame destiny if this didn’t turn out nice”

 

“Yah! Why are you always looking for someone or something to blame?”

 

“Well, I can’t really blame you. Can I?”

 

 “you really are something lil’ panda. If you didn’t make us worried you gave us trouble”, Dara shook her head in disbelief, “You better apologize to your hyungs, arraseo?”

 

“noona, you knew I’m not really use to—“

 

“don’t make excuses you apologize to them or I will no longer talk to you”

 

“are you blackmailing me?” he laugh, “that won’t work on me”

 

Dara raise an eyebrow and that makes him gulp a lump in his throat. If there is someone his afraid the most, it was her and she knew that. He was a very special dongsaeng to him, actually more like a true brother to her.

 

“are you serious?” Seungri asked as he looks at her and she just nod at him with serious face.

 

“Ara, I’ll apologize”, he sigh in defeat making Dara smile.

 

“then let’s go”, she pulled him with her downstairs where the others are waiting. 

 

---

Sandara’s POV

 

Time passed and I can see how everyone tries to cheer me up. Visiting me at home and even my office, bringing me around every weekend and not letting me be left alone and I was really glad and thankful to them. I try to live normal; the way I used to be but that’s just something I do outside the four corners of my room. The longing pain hadn’t left me yet and still killing me every night.

 

It wasn’t long when we realize where he was since a news about his Japanese activities came out. I was in the bigbang dressing room when that news flash and every eye were focused on me as mine were focused on the screen. I felt a my heart  pounding fast inside my chest as I stare at his face on the monitor; it felt centuries since I last saw him. He stares straight at the camera as he showed that smile of his that surely melts me.

 

 “Noona—“

 

“I’m alright you guys don’t have to worry”, I assured them with a smile.

 

I’m happy seeing him doing fine now. After what I did to him I can’t asked for more, right?

 

“So what are your plans?” I was startled a bit as Jiyong suddenly sat beside me looking at me curiously after I excused myself out to get some fresh air.

 

“Nothing”

 

“You already know where he is, aren’t you planning on following him?”

 

“His trying to persuade his dreams once more, I don’t want to ruin it”

 

“nae”, he nodded looking ahead “but hyung need to know what you truly felt”

 

“I guess I just have to wait”, I meekly reply.

 

I was kindda taken aback when Jiyong suddenly place his hands above mine and I look at him confused. He gave me reassuring smile as he gave my hand a squeeze.

 

“You know we'll back you up if sangjangnim don’t keep his promise, right?”

 

“Thank you”

 

This was the first time I actually saw this side of Jiyong, he used to keep his distance from me before, that result of us being awkward to one another. But now, his here to support me and comfort me just like everyone else and it makes me feel really happy.

 

 

 

“Where here”, Jiyong beams out as he stop the car beside the street.

 

“Where?” I asked as I had no idea where he brought me at this late hour. I just come along since he was too persistent about it and I his eyes twinkle with anticipation.

 

We came in a small stall where Jiyong greeted the ahjumma happily. It seems he always went to this place as he no longer worry if people notice him as he took of his disguise and drag me to a small table in the corner.

 

“What are we doing here? Isn’t it dangerous for you—“

 

“SHHH”, he cut me off “since it’s a gloomy day for you—“, he paused “ani, let’s change that”, he smiled at me innocently.

 

“Since I receive my check, shall we drink to our hearts content?”

 

“Finally after all that happen to me you’re the first one that asked me to drink”, I chuckle as I gave him a nod and he immediately called the ahjumma for drinks.

 

Maybe this something I really need at this moment to erase the heavy feeling inside my chest and I was really glad with his offer.

 

“Is there something wrong with my face?” Jiyong asked as I watched him pour me a drink.

 

“No”, I smiled.

 

“Then why are you starring at me like that?”

 

“I really thought you hate me”, I blurted out without thinking that makes him frozen for a second before he put down the bottle and look straight at me.

 

“I don’t”, he said with a small smile.

 

“But it looks like that before”

 

Jiyong is Seunghyun's closest friend among the members since they already knew each other before they even became group members so I was hopping among all the guys he’ll be the one closest friend to me and Seunghyun, plus he was also part of my peers but it didn’t end that way. Since our relationship was revealed, Jiyong started to drift away from the group. He didn’t meddle around with our relationship like the president but I always felt an awkward aura whenever his around and looking at us. He is the one that always makes me felt uneasy waiting for Seunghyun in their dressing room. Though we got a formal relationship, saying our greetings and small talks, we never really got to know each other like now.

 

“Well, I did”, I almost sprout the drink I had sip when I heard him say that.

 

So he really did hate me.

 

“I see”, my tone drop as everything seems to be awkward again.

 

“Yah!” he placed his hand on my head making me look up at him. “I sort of hate you when you disappear from some time and came up with another man but before that and right now”, he smiled “I don’t”

 

“Yeah, I also hate myself that time”, I said agreeing to him. Disappearing from Seunghyun must be one of the stupidest mistakes I came up.

 

“Let me mix that”, he took my glass once again and started mixing beer with large amounts.

 

“Oh!” my eyes widen in excitement as our glass where almost full. I admit I’m somehow a heavy drinker but I didn’t expect he is too.

 

“You think you can handle this?” he asked before handing me my glass.

 

“Ofcourse”, I proudly reply as I took it happily.

 

“Good, don’t worry I’ll drive you home”

 

“Well, that’s if you’re going to be awake after some more rounds”, I chuckle.

 

“I’ll make sure of that”

 

“This is for the new friendship”, I cheer as I raise my glass high up in the air and I just heard him chuckle as his glass meets mine.

 

---

 

“Seunhyun”, Dara softly mumble as her head was resting on the table falling asleep after three more rounds of alcohol. Jiyong hands stop midway as he heard her mumble his name. He let go of a sigh before looking back at her sleeping form and reaching out to wipe the tear that roll down her face.

 

“This is the reason why I always envy hyung”, he then said as a bitter smile emerges on his lips.

~o0o~